Crystal Walls
by Lioness1968
Summary: You never know in what form love emerges… Information: Femslash.. dont like, dont read
1. Chapter 1

**Pairing: **Sara Sidle & Sofia Curtis

**Rating: **R

**Spoiler warning: **None!__

**Warning: **Mature sexual content and coarse language. _Femslash, but if you weren't into gay stories you wouldn't be here… Right? _

**Disclaimer: **Some of the characters and situations in this story belong to Alliance Atlantis, CBS, Anthony Zuicker and other entities, and I do not have permission to borrow them. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes_.__Any errors are mine. _

**Summary: **A look into my own alternate universe…

** Crystal Walls! **

_**Chapter 1**_

**The present:**

"Sidle, are you coming?" Doug called out, "I would like to get on the road sometime today!"

"Yes, in a minute," Sara answered back, "go get the car and I'll meet you out front."

Doug went into the garage and retrieved the car and when he drove up in front of the main door Sara was standing waiting for him. Sara threw her bags on the backseat and climbed into the car and soon after they were on their way towards highway 80.

"Ever been to Sacramento before?" Doug asked.

"No, the closest I've been is Putah Creek State Wildlife Area for some hiking. What about you?"

Doug smiled, "yes quite some times, had a girlfriend there once but it's a few years ago so the town has probably changed some since. Regarding the matter I don't get why our presence is required I know they have their own lab so shouldn't they be capable of doing the investigation themselves?"

"Well, according to Stephanie Douglas they are not only understaffed it as much seem like their lab equipment is so old that the equipment build into this car is more up to date." Sara shrugged "and as I understood it the police department there is all over them they need answers ASAP because they suspect the guy they are looking for might be a serial rapist. So apparently John thought it was faster sending us out there instead of having the lab tech sending us the samples."

Doug shrugged "guess that make sense," he briefly gazed at Sara, "so, is the lab rumor true?"

"Guess it depends on which one of them you are referring to" Sara grinned, "If there is one thing I learned fast it would be that there are always rumors in a lab and that it's extremely rare there are much true to them."

"No guess not, but the one I'm referring to says that you are going to be the new supervisor when John retire."

Sara gave him half a smile, "yeah I heard that one too but to the best of my knowledge it's only a rumor no one has said anything specific to me."

For the rest of the trip they just small talked. Two hours later they arrived in Sacramento and Doug did know his way around town and soon after they parked in front of Sacramento's CSI laboratory, they went inside and were met by a middle-aged man.

"Hello and welcome to Sacramento I'm supervisor Gregory Cox."

"Hello, and you're welcome I'm Sara Sidle and this is Doug Baker."

They all shook hands and subsequently they got a brief tour in the lab before going into Mr. Cox's office; he gave them a short introduction to the case and then suggested they all went out to dinner.

Doug asked if they shouldn't go by the local police department or at least take a look at the evidence that were gathered so far but Gregory thought it could wait to the next day. He suggested that they spend the night going over the case file so they knew exactly what had been done and what they needed to take a further look at and furthermore they couldn't get to speak with the leading Detective on the case until the next day.

So they went out to dinner and afterwards Mr. Cox guided them to the motel where they'd be staying while being in town, he gave them a copy of the case file and said goodnight and left.

Doug and Sara got a drink together in the bar before calling it a night. Sara had taken a cup of coffee with her so after unpacking she went out on the little balcony and sat down and looked out on the city drinking her coffee.

**Tbc… **


	2. Chapter 2

_**Chapter 2**_

**Two and a half years earlier: **

Tears were running down her cheeks as the taxi pulled out and started driving her towards the airport, she knew it wasn't a fair way of leaving Vegas or Grissom but she just couldn't stay any longer even if that meant leaving Gil. She hadn't said anything to him – afraid he would talk her out of her decision – but she had left him a letter explaining that she had to leave to bury her ghosts.

After escaping the miniature killer and returning to her job she seemed to be increasingly ground down by the constant scenes of death and abuse that made up her daily life and everything had just culminating a month later when Hanna – a youthful murderer who had previously 'run her in circles' – had showed up again and revealed her own old scars.

Sara knew that first she had to come to terms with her troubled childhood. For years, she'd told herself it was over, that it had no impact on her present, but now she realized that was a myth. Instead of dealing with the pain, she ran. First getting into college early moving across the continent, physically distancing her from the source of the torment.

Later, she dove into her work, pushing a professional satisfaction to cover for her personal unhappiness. But the abuse she had suffered formed the foundation of the life she built for herself, and the cracks were becoming more pronounced. The damage had always been there, just below the surface. Trust was something rarely given; she had a drive to succeed, to be recognized, that bordered on obsessive; nagging questions about her self-worth, especially in personal matters, continually gnawed at her confidence.

Now Sara knew she had to address her demons. They were creeping out of her nightmares and into everyday life. Her ability to deal with cases was suffering, and her turn to alcohol had been a near-disaster.

Leaving Vegas had brought her back to San Francisco. Not sure about what to do with her life or where it would go from there she had simply chosen to move in at a B&B for a while to figure out what to do and to start a long process of healing.

Sara knew her mother lived in Frisco, since she was twenty-one she had received message every time there had been changes to her mother. When she was twenty-five her mother were transferred from a maximum security mental facility where she had been locked up since the day she killed her husband to an open institution which helped the long-term 'prisoners' to be ready to again be able to stay and succeed in society.

It was about six months after her mother had moved to the institution Sara had received a letter from her. Laura had never apologized for her action or showed any regrets for killing her husband but she did felt terrible for it was her two children who had had to pay the price for her deed. She did not expect that Sara would ever forgive her for it but she hoped one day she would/could find it in her heart to get in contact with her.

Four months later Sara had answered back and from thereon they had written each other occasionally but Sara had never visited her. Three years later Laura had moved out of the institution and into a flat but it had been around the same time Sara had moved to Vegas so they still hadn't met but kept up the writing.

Three months after returning to Frisco Sara had finally picked up the phone and called her mother telling her she was back in town and two weeks later they had met for the first time since Sara was thirteen years old. It had been very awkward in the beginning both very careful not to say anything inappropriate or offensive. They had worked through a number of issues and slowly they had got to known each other again and Sara had finally managed to come to some peace and understanding with some of the things from her childhood.

Being in a much better position emotionally and psychologically; unable to avoid her ghosts, she'd finally faced them, and it had lifted a weight from her psyche that she'd never known existed. So six months after leaving Vegas Sara knew she needed to find some kind of work but any kind of law enforcement was out of the question.

So when she was offered a trip to Costa Rica working as a photographer on a research project she had accepted and it had ended up being the best decision she had taken in many years. Just to meet other people who came from very different professional and talked about anything but death and destruction had been so refreshing it had been a woman in psychological balance with herself and filled with a renewed energy that had returned to Frisco six months later.

Initially she moved in with her mother, but it was a small apartment she had so it wasn't a solution that was sustainable in the long run, but after a few months it was succeeded to find an apartment in a housing complex in Oakland. Sara wasn't the type who didn't work so after she had moved; she started searching for a job, for a time she had had a few hours a couple of days a week at Berkeley where she taught science.

A step in the transition program from the institution was to prove that you could fit a job so even before Laura had left the institution she was connected to a hostel for homeless people in a job training program. She had quickly managed to make herself indispensable and was quickly offered a permanent position. Thanks to her experience in running a B&B and her understanding of users' situation it had only taken her five years to work her way up to the position as warden.

The days Sara hadn't been teaching she had enjoyed helping out at the hostel, always analytical, Sara had presented her mother with plans and suggestions for the house while she had put her knowledge of rules and laws available to users.

It had been through the hostel Sara had gotten in contact with a children's home called The Rainbow Home, lying further down the street. Laura had recruited a few of the older children who lived there to facilitate the outstanding work, such as easier cleaning and kitchen help. Thanks to Laura the two places had also signed a cooperation agreement which meant, whenever one house had something in excess it was passed on to the other house.

It had been Laura who had proposed Sara to contact The Rainbow Home, she had noticed how good a contact Sara had with the young people who came into the house and thought that perhaps there were other children at the home who could benefit from Sara's experience.

Sara had glossy rejected the idea in the beginning the last she needed was to relive her own time in a children's home. But Laura had not given up she was sure it would be healthy for Sara to see everything from an adult perspective not to mention it would be good for the kids to see that one well could be somebody and have a good life even if you had spent some of your childhood in a children's home.

Sara had finally let herself be persuaded to speak with Ms. Carmen Apollo - the warden of The Rainbow Home - after a long talk they had agreed on that Sara could make her teaching qualifications available she would be there three to four times a week from 6.30 to 8.30 p.m.

Sara had been told that most of the children were not less talented than other children but because of their upbringing many of them had difficult to concentrate for extended periods of time because they were more busy to monitor their surroundings. So Sara's work activities would be in the study room, it was a space where the children felt safe and where there would be peace and tranquility and just by her presence it would allow them to ask for help and guidance whenever they needed it.

When Sara had said yes to the agreement she had not in her wildest imagination thought that it would be a decision that would forever change her life!

It had been a tough start, Sara had repeatedly been about to give up and it was only thanks to her stubbornness she hadn't. The children had greeted her with a great distrust and unwillingness and several of them had never talked to her in the beginning. Sara had been fully aware that it wasn't her as a person the kids disliked but what she represented, an authority.

But Sara was well able to remember the suspicion she had entertained against foreigners as a child so she had chosen a different approach, instead of making herself up like a typical teacher she had simply chosen to sit down at a table with her laptop. She had already downloaded some 'edu-tainment' programs at once offers education and entertainment for kids.

She hadn't asked or encouraged any of the children to try it she had just turned up the volume and started one of the games and it hadn't lasted long before curiosity among the youngest children had been greater than their distrust toward her and slowly they had come over to see what she did. It took three evenings before the first child finally had overcome his aloofness and asked if he might try which he naturally had been allowed to, after that the rest of the evening had gone with several of the children in turn had tried various games.

The older children had been somewhat longer to thaw toward her but just that the children had moved a table closer each time she had been there had been reason enough for her to retain her tactics.

The final breakthrough came about two weeks later when Dylan a young guy started talking to her, that he had indicated his acceptance of her had been the final turning point for the others to start talking to her as well. Although Sara mainly had been 'hired' to provide homework help had many evenings been used to talk about much else, the children had been very fascinated and amazed when they had learned that Sara even in a period of her life had lived at a children's home but it had meant that she had gone from just being an adult to being one of them and her popularity was not diminished when she through Berkeley had obtained four computers for shared use.

Sara had repeatedly noticed a little girl standing in the doorway looking into the room but without rising measures to come in and whenever their eyes had met she had turned and disappeared again.

One evening when Sara was entering the room, she found the little girl sitting in front of one of the computers; she had been so preoccupied with the game she was playing that she hadn't noticed Sara before some of the other kids noisy had come into the room.

Her first instinct had been to flee but seeing Sara's relaxed and encouraging smile had prompted her to change her mind and stay. Not to scare the girl away Sara had simply let her sit by herself while she had put her attention towards the other kids.

The next couple of evenings had been the same the girl had faithfully sat at the computer when Sara had arrived and stayed until an employee had come and fetched her because it was her bedtime. It took over a week before Sara heard the girl's voice for the first time, it had been a night where two second-class pupils had sat and discussed ways of spelling a particular word finally Amy had looked up from the computer and said none of them were right and had spelled it for them.

Sara had been speechless not only that the girl's spelling was correct but as much that none of the other children did any measures to contradict her they had just written the word as she had spelled it, and Amy hadn't said anything else rest of the evening.

A few nights later, Sara randomly ran into Carmen and had taken the opportunity to ask a little further into the background story of Amy.

It had appeared that Amy's story was somewhat different than many of the other children's; she wasn't from a home with violence or other abuse as so many others, her mother had died of cancer when she was three and two years later she had lost her father and sister in a traffic accident. Both her parents had been an only child so there had been no family who could take her, the grandparents on her mother's side was still alive but both were in their eighties a lived at an old-age home and was not able to take care of a little girl, so it had left child service with no other option but to place her in a children's home.

Carmen though had been reasonably confident on Amy's behalf the fact that she wasn't older gave her a good chance of being adopted, actually they were already in contact with a family who were very interested to adopt Amy so hopefully she wouldn't be staying at The Rainbow Home for long.

About two weeks later Sara had her first real talk with Amy. When Sara one evening had entered the study room she had found Amy sitting on one of the small sofas crying, earlier in the day she'd been introduced to the Smith family which was the family who wanted to adopt her and Amy had certainly not cared about them.

Sara had had to hide a smile when Amy with a five-year-old directness had said that under no circumstances was she going to live with that family she would rather stay where she were. When Sara had asked for further details to what were wrong with the family Amy had looked her straight in the eye and said that they were stupid their son didn't even know what state he lived in.

Sara had subsequently tried to explain Amy although they may not have been the world's smartest people they could very well be sweet and nice anyway, but Sara had only been faced with a little of her own stubbornness there. Amy had not been responsive or willing to change her mind but had stubbornly held on hers, so Sara had chosen not to press further on.

A part of The Rainbows politics concerning an adoption order any family who applied for adoption would have to commit oneself to on a regularly basis to come by the house and visit the child so the family wouldn't be completely foreign to the child if the appropriation went through.

So over the next month the Smith family came by to visit Amy and on several occasions they took her with them to various events, but counter to what was intended by the visits things were far from developing in the desired direction. Amy had gotten more and more depressed and moody she had pulled away from the others and no longer participated in some joint activities and eventually she had only left her room around mealtimes and the evenings Sara had been there.

As anyone else Sara had noticed how much Amy had changed so she had once again visited Carmen to figure out what was going on with the little girl, Carmen had assured Sara that it was a very natural reaction from a child who was to be adopted.

For all children who were placed at The Rainbow home, it was mandatory that they were evaluated by a psychologist and based on his evaluation Amy among other things suffered from separation anxiety so it was an expected reaction from her with the upcoming changes in her life. Furthermore the Smith family was very experienced in adoption situations, their son Ben was also adopted so they had already been through it all once before so Carmen was sure that given time everything would fall out for the best for all parties.

Sara who personally didn't have the greatest trust in psychologists had nevertheless chosen to believe Carmen and the very competent staff surrounding the children.

After moving back to Frisco Sara had repeatedly encountered some of her old coworkers and several of her old friends, her return had been rumored for her former supervisor Peter Reeves so slowly she had begun moonlighting nights at the SF CSI team. After doing that for six months Sara had finally accepted that it was in that line of work she belonged and could make herself most useful so she had said yes to work there on a permanent basis on the night shift.

Bryan Jackson, a middle-age man in his forties had been the only remain from her previous time on the night shift, a few others of her former coworkers was still there but were now working on other shifts.

Dan Lewis, was still the leading Doc in the coroner office in many ways Doc Robbins had always reminded her of Dan except Dan still contained some of the shy boyish behavior she so often had witness in "super Dave."

Two weeks after school had started again Carmen Apollo had called to hear if Sara would be interested in resuming her work at The Rainbow Home.

At first Sara had been very hesitant not that she didn't wanted to help out but because of her job, she knew she could get called in before or in the middle of a tutoring lesson and was afraid her absence could end up disappointing the kids. But Carmen had assured her that the children could easily understand and relate to it as long as they were informed about it, and finally Sara had said yes.

Except for Amy who had moved out and now lived with the Smith family it had been the same kids that had greeted her, quite a few had admitted they had missed her but not the homework and told her what they had been up to during their vacation but after a few evenings they finally had come around to the homework.

**Tbc…**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Chapter 3 **_

One evening after Sara had gotten home her mother had called to hear if she could come by because she had something she needed to talk with her about, and Sara of course had said yes. Laura had arrived a hour later and by the way she had acted Sara pretty fast understood it was something very important her mother wanted to talk about, they had made coffee and soon after been seated in the living room. Laura had looked very nervous and not really sure about how to get started but Sara who was clueless to what it was her mother wanted to talk about had just stayed silent, but to this day Sara could still remember the subsequent conversation.

"Sara, what I'm about to tell you probably goner come as a shock to you and maybe I should have told you about it earlier," Laura hesitated, "but the thing is that I have been in contact with your brother Craig just as long as I have been in contact with you!"

At first Sara had just looked at her mother in disbelieve her ability to speak was suddenly gone but she had finally managed to burst out a "what?"

Laura had given her half a smile and started talking again. "Back when I first wrote you I wrote him as well and just like you he answered back," Laura explained. "It was two very similar letters I wrote the two of you, - no expectations only my hopes for the future – but contrary to you he one day showed up on his own initiative while I still lived at the institution."

Sara had been floored to the stool just sat like a rock sculpture eyes wide open her brain trying but not able to comprehend the things her mother were telling her.

Laura continued, "Over the years he kept coming by on a regular basis and slowly we rebuilt our relationship like you and I have, he helped me finding the flat and moving in and like you he comes by whenever he has the time."

Laura stopped talking and for several minutes the room went dead silent but Sara finally found her voice.

"Does he know about me?"

"Yes he does," Laura smiled, "he has followed you and your career since the day you started at Harvard."

"What?"

Laura chuckled a bit not really use to Sara's lack of words, "the first times we met he hardly told a word about his own life all he talked about was you and how great you were doing."

"Why didn't he contact me if he knew where I was?"

"I don't know that for sure Sara it's something you'll have to ask him yourself."

Sara narrowed her eyes, "why are you telling me this… I mean why now?"

Laura sighed, "Different reasons I guess, I've always wanted to tell you but never been sure about when the right time was for doing so, but the case is that Craig also lives here in Frisco and even if the chances are slim the possibility of the two of you bumping into each other is presence and since I don't know if you even will be interested in meeting him I think I at least should warn you about his presence."

Sara gave her mother an odd look, "and you expect us to recognize each other after all these years?"

"Oh, that I'm certain of," Laura assured her.

Tilting her head to the side Sara narrowed her eyes suspiciously but didn't say anything.

"Look Sara, whether you want to meet him some day or not is entirely up to you I just wanted you to know to give you the possibility to make your own choice."

After a silent moment, Sara lifted her head and looked at her mother, "what about Craig does he want to meet?"

Laura blinked and stared at her daughter, "yes he does but he wants it to be your decision whether you meet or not. Look there's no urgent so why don't you think it through very thorough before making your mind up, okay?"

"Mm-hmm" was all Sara had said.

Over the next weeks Sara had done a lot of thinking and the more she thought the more questions was bobbling up in her head so after three weeks of thinking she had finally told her mother that she wanted or maybe more needed to see her brother. It had happened a few nights later in her mother's apartment.

Standing in front of her mother's front door a mixture of emotions had rushed through Sara's body she clasped and unclasped her hands nervously her stomach was in knots, she got palpitation as her finger reached the doorbell willed herself to be calm as she waited for her mother to open the door.

Laura opened the door, "hi sweetie, come on in Craig is already here."

"Hi mom," Sara said with a calm voice she far from felt.

They went into the living room, a tall man stood by the window with his back towards them he slowly turned around dark eyes bored into dark eyes as the two stared at each other in shock, almost as if they were each seeing a ghost.

Sara was completely frozen in place her mouth fell open for a moment before she closed it promptly her eyes were wide, her expression something between surprise and disbelieve.

Craig's mouth also dropped open revealing a tiny gap between his teeth he started to take a step forward, but his progress stopped as if there were some sort of invisible shield holding him back.

Sara's posture had turned rigid and she desperately tried to gain control of her emotions. Craig bit his lip, and Sara recalled the familiar quirk her brother used whenever he was nervous. The view put her body in motion slowly she approached her brother; she reached out to touch him for the first time in what seemed like a lifetime and, to both it pretty much had been.

Craig watched her getting closer and closer he slowly stepped forward to meet his sister, he reached out and pulled Sara into a tight embrace. The two Sidles held onto each other both with tears in their eyes wondering about what might have been had they not been separated so many years ago.

Several minutes later, Sara released her brother and stepped back, wiping her tears with her sleeves, "hey" she said with a voice sounding awkwardly in her own ear.

"Hey Sara," Craig said with the same husky voice as Sara's just deeper.

Sara just kept looking at Craig even if he had turned into a man he still in so many ways looked like she remembered him. The shy boyish smile the little scar above his right eyebrow even the glint of humor in his eyes that so often had brought him into trouble as a boy was still there. Sara lightly shook her head finally understanding why her mother had been so sure that they would recognize each other if they accidentally met some day.

"You look good, Craig, grown up but still as I remember you" Sara said truthfully.

"Thank you," Craig smiled "you on the other hand have changed a lot you're not the skinny lanky girl I once knew you have turned into quite a beautiful woman, Sara."

"Thank you so how has life treated you?" Sara replied, giving him an inquisitive look.

Craig looked down and shrugged, "hard in the beginning" he murmured, "but it got better along the way and today I have a good life."

Sara gave him an assuring smile, "Craig, its okay to say you have a good life, I'm glad to hear that's the case you deserve to be happy."

"Yeah I know it's just… I guess a part of me always feels ashamed and guilty for bailing out on you leaving you behind."

Sara went closer and placed her hand on her brother's lower arm, "Craig, you were a kid yourself and it's not like neither of us had any influence of where we went so stop blaming yourself it's not your fault how things turned out back then and as you can see I'm still alive and kicking," Sara said giving him a little smile.

"I know" Craig sighed and smiled back, "it's just not that easy, but yeah you really do look great sis so has life treated you well?"

Sara took a step back and chuckled, "you tell me?"

Laura who had stayed in the kitchen the whole time walked into the living room to call them to the dinner table.

Craig glanced at Laura as she walked into the room, "mooom?!"

Laura looked back at her son, "what?"

What have you been telling Sara since she suspects me to know everything about her life?"

"Oh, um," Laura stuttered as her cheeks turned light pink, "I might have mentioned that you knew she went to Harvard," Laura tried to change the conversation topic, "kid's dinner is ready so let's eat while it's still warm."

They all went to the kitchen and sat down as the dishes had been circulated Craig looked at Sara's plate and arched a brow and chuckled.

"Lamb isn't your thing, sis?"

"Meat isn't my thing hasn't been for years," Sara answered before telling him about Grissom's experiment with a pig years earlier, "After that I became a vegetarian."

"Think you would have become one anyway," Craig said "you were already into animal rights and welfare at the ages of five; I can still remember when you have found a kitten and made me promise that I would wake you up twice at night so you could feed it."

"You still remember that?" Sara said blushing at Craig's remark, "and sorry about that it wasn't fair to demand it of you knowing you had to go to school the next day."

Craig started laughing at Sara's reaction, "Cupcake, I'm five years older than you I don't think you could have persuaded me into doing it if I didn't wanted too."

Sara's face turned even redder hearing Craig using her old nickname, "you remember that too?"

Craig narrowed his eyes and tilted his head a bit and gazed at Sara, "Cupcake, I'm might in my forties but I have in no way incipient senile dementia, of course I remember and I also remember why I started calling you that in the first place. Sara we might have been apart for many years but that does not mean in any ways that I have erased you from my memory, you were and will forever be my Cupcake."

Sara looked sheepish down on the table and almost whispered, "I don't even remember why you started calling me Cupcake."

Craig waited until Sara finally looked up again, "then let me refresh your memory, every time dad were done beating the crap out of me you were the one who always took care of me, afterwards you would come into my room to see if I was alright without saying a word you would crawled into my bed and snuggle up behind me and very gently let you hand stroke over my arm until I stopped crying."

Craig cleared his throat softly. "When you were sure I was okay you would get out of bed and sneak into the kitchen and here things never failed regardless what kind of cake we had in the house you would always return with two glasses of milk and two cupcakes. Whether there was a larger unexplained reason or you simply just loved that cake I never figured out but it always made you giggle whenever I called you it."

He chuckled lightly, "I never really liked those cakes but just to see the smile that would appear on your face when I took the first bite always made me feel better and was enough to eat it. So for me, calling you Cupcake both became synonymous with our little rituals and as much it was the word that always could bring a smile to your lips and seeing you smile always made me glad."

"Oh," was about all Sara could say because of the lump in her throat and because she didn't really knew how to respond to what Craig just had said.

To save the mood Laura chuckled and said, "Sorry kids but I don't have any cupcakes in the house so you'll have to settle for some ice-cream.

"Fine," the siblings said with one voice making them both laugh.

Rest of the evening went in a good atmosphere both Craig and Sara had told about their life, it had come as a shock to Sara when Craig had told her he was married and had two kids but she was happy for him, actually it had also been a shock to her learning he worked in a bank that wasn't really a place she would have pictured him ending up.

The evening came to an end the siblings got up at the same time and after saying goodnight they left the house together, it had been arranged that Sara would come by Craig's house three days later to meet his family, they said goodnight at the parking lot and went to their cars when Sara reached her car she turned and looked at Craig.

"Craig, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure" he said walking towards her.

"I'm just wondering if you have known where I was since Harvard, then why have you never looked me up or called."

"For the same reason you never looked me up," he answered.

"I never knew where you were," Sara said self-righteous.

"Sara, for the last ten years you have been among the ten best investigators in the country and Sidle isn't your everyday last name so my guess is it would have taken you under an hour if you wanted to find me. So why didn't you?"

"Because I was afraid you wouldn't have anything to do with me that I would be a memory of the past," Sara flatly admitted.

"And that's exactly why I didn't contact you either, Cupcake."

Sara hugged him, "well, I am glad that mom told me about you," she said releasing him "looking forward to meet your family, goodnight Craig."

"Me too, night Sara" he said walking back to his car.

Sara went straight to bed when she came home it had been a good while an exhausting day she slept the minute her head hit the pillow and for once her dreams were good - confusing and a mess of the day's events – but definitely good.

Her visit at Craig went well, she had immediately liked his wife Ellen it took her some time suddenly having to deal with that she was an aunt but both children had been nice and well-mannered, according to Ellen no thanks to Craig who had a tendency to spoil them. But she had said it with a very loving voice well aware her husband's upbringing had everything to do with that and Craig hadn't contradicted her he had just looked very affectionate at her. The night had come to an early stop when Sara's office had pages her and ninety minutes later she had been on her way to a crime scene.

A man had been found murdered on his living room floor and his little boy was missing from the home. A neighbor had called the police after seeing a car leave the driveway in high speed without closing the front door. But except pointing out in what direction the car had left and what kind of car he thought he had seen there hadn't been much more he could tell them.

So while Sara and her partner for the night had worked the scene a lot of patrol cars had searched the area where it was most likely to hide a car. Twenty hours later the car had been pulled over by a patrol car and without any drama a woman had handed over the boy, it had turned out it was the ex wife that had killed the man because he had threatened to get full custody over their son. So thirty-six hours after vanishing from his home the boy had safely been handed over to some relatives, after finish up the paperwork Sara had gone home glad that they had manages to find the boy alive.

The good mood Sara had arriving in at The Rainbow Home had totally disappeared when she had walked into the study room and found this shadow that once had been Amy on the sofa, when their eyes met Amy's had looked so haunted that Sara felt her heart stop.

Her pale face seemed to glow in the golden light of the study room and Sara shuddered, what she saw was a ghost from her past, a reminder of her childhood, Amy had remained still which had floored Sara for a moment not really sure about how to handle the situation. Slowly Sara had approached the little girl she kneeled down in front of her bringing herself in eyelevel with Amy and smiled.

"Hi, what are you doing here?"

Amy shrugged and mumbled, "Living here I suppose."

A million questions flew around in Sara's brain but she was wise enough to know Amy wasn't the one she should be asking anything.

"Well, I'm very happy to see you again I have missed you," Sara said.

Amy furrowed her brows and looked confused, "you have?" she asked almost unable to believe her own ear.

Sara gave her a big smile and nodded, "of course I have who wouldn't miss a sweet girl like you."

Amy's eyes widen, "you think I'm sweet?"

"Not only do I think you're a sweet girl you are also very smart so maybe you want to help me teaching your roommates?"

Amy's sad face slowly went into a smile, the world-weariness was not completely gone from the little girl's face, but her smile was genuine, she got to her feet and followed Sara to the table and helped opening the computers.

None of the other kids had said anything about Amy's presence after coming into the room but the little smile on their faces every time they sneak peeked at Amy told Sara that they were genuine glad to see her in the room with them.

The last kid had barely left the study room before Sara were on her way to the wardens office, Carmen were sitting in her office two mugs of coffee already standing on the table and just as she had predicted a knock was heard on her door at 8.35 p.m.

"Come in" Carmen called out.

Sara opened the door, "hey, am I disturbing you?"

Carmen smiled and nodded towards the coffee mugs, "no you're expected."

Sara arched a brow and walked in and took a seat, "why is Amy back?" She blurted out.

Carmen narrowed her eyes, "You know the rules restrict me from telling you everything so I'm giving you this information as a fellow city employee, understood?

Sara got the message, "understood!"

"Well, Amy had completely refused to integrate from day one, she almost fled into her room and had only come out at request, the whole thing had escalated after the holidays when the family had told Amy that she wouldn't start school since everything still was new to her so they didn't feel she was quite ready yet.

Except for telling them they were stupid and that she wanted to go back to the Home Amy hadn't said a word since and after another month like that the family had finally given up and returned her to The Rainbow Home." Carmen arched a brow and slightly tilted her head, "actually…thinking about it you're the first one she barely has talked to after coming back."

Sara's brain was working in overdrive, "so what happens now?"

Carmen shrugged, "for now she stays here and then I guess we just have to wait and see if another family comes by and wants to adopt her."

"What about school?" Sara asked.

Carmen looked sad, "won't happen The Rainbow Home can't afford to pay for kindergarten so she will have to wait until she can start in elementary school…unless," Carmen hesitated "you volunteer to teach her?! We have a mentoring program that pairs some of our children with adults if you'd be interested in that…"

Sara who was totally unprepared for that question just shook her head, "um, no. I don't know the least about kids and with my job, I…I just needed to know how to handle this."

"It's okay Sara, I do understand and you are already doing a great job as it is," Carmen insured.

Sara got up and said her goodnight and left the room she stopped in the hallway and leaned against the wall lightly banged her head into the wall "shit" she cursed, she pushed herself off the wall and went back and knocked on Carmen's door and opened it without waiting for an answer, "Hi…where do I sign up?"

Carmen chuckled and looked up from the papers in front of her, "I'm already on it!"

Sara was half in shock as she walked towards her car wondering what she had gotten herself into, she just committed the spare time of a workaholic to a troubled child she knew absolutely nothing about.

_Have I acted before thinking?_

She got genuinely afraid as her mind began to spin scenarios off all the things that could go wrong.

_Have I gotten myself into more than I can handle?_

The last thing Amy needed was another disappointment she had already been through the worst in her young life. Sara felt the bile rise in her throat as a thunderstorm of thoughts echoed in her head.

She was about to leave the car and go back to Carmen's office to call the whole thing off but for some inscrutable reasons her body refused to move she leaned back and took some deep breath before turning the engine on and heading home.

When Sara had gotten home she had dropped down on the couch and for a long time just glanced at the ceiling and tried to sort out her thoughts subsequently she had picked out her phone and called Carmen asking if she could be the one to tell Amy about it which had been okay with Carmen.

Next she had called Ellen and Craig wondering if they maybe had some books or anything from when their kids had been in kindergarten. Ellen had been sure it all were packed away in the garage and promised to go look the next day and then call back when it was ready for Sara to pick up.

Afterwards she had gone to bed but sleep hadn't come easy she were still much in doubt whether she just had made the biggest mistake in a lifetime.

**Tbc…**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter 4**_

The next day she had arrived at The Rainbow Home earlier than usually so she could talk with Amy before tuition began, she found the little girl in her room.

Sara lightly knocked on the open door, Hi Amy."

Amy looked at the watch at the sound of Sara's voice, "you're early."

"I know" Sara said sending the girl a smile, "can I come in?"

Amy shrugged and slightly nodded.

Sara walked in and sat down on a stool and looked at the girl sitting on the bed, "how are you doing? Settled in yet?"

Again Amy just shrugged and mumbled, "I'm okay."

Sara's fingers were nervously drumming on her thigh all the sudden she felt very unsure about how to approach the very withdrawn girl. "So" she hesitated "hear you want to go to school."

"Yeah" Amy answered looking at Sara unsure about where she was going with that, "but I can't go before next year because I'm not old enough."

"Hmm" Sara said, "that sucks." While Amy considered Sara's words she was planning her next move, smiling nervously she looked at Amy and took a deep breath. "I know it won't exactly be like going to school but…" she hesitated.

"But…" Amy said all her focus on Sara while holding her breath.

"Perhaps I could come by and teach you various stuff several days a week? Kind of being your private tutor!"

Amy's eyes widen, "for real? You mean that?"

Sara smiled, "yes I mean that but only if you want me to it's an offer not a request."

Amy's face shortly lit up in a smile but it quickly disappeared again, she looked down on her hands without saying a word.

Sara narrowed her brows and looked at the girl's reaction wondering what was going on inside her head, "Amy, its okay for you to say no if you don't want to, I know it's not the same as going to school."

Amy shrugged "I want to" her voice nothing more than a whisper, "but…"

"But what Amy? It's okay you can tell me, I promise I won't get mad."

"I don't think I will be allowed to, Carmen thinks I'm too young for school," Amy said with tears in her eyes.

Sara got up and went over to the bed and took a seat on the edge, "Amy, please look at me," she waited until the girl looked up, "I would never suggest a thing like that unless I'd already had cleared it with Carmen actually it was her idea."

Amy looked a bit confused, "true?" She asked her voice high and a little nervous.

Sara looked into the girl's eyes, "Amy, I don't know how this will go, it's not a thing I have ever done before, so I probably goner do a lot of things wrong. But there is one thing I can promise you right here and now, I will never ever lie to you, no matter what. No matter what I'll have to tell you, good or bad, I will say it as it is, and that's the truth."

Amy gave her half a smile and nodded, "okay."

Sara exhaled relieved, "okay, then perhaps you should run by Carmen's office and tell her your decision?"

Amy crawled out of bed and walked towards the door but stopped in the doorway and glanced at Sara, "um, when do we start?"

Sara smiled, "well, today is Friday so normally school is closed now, so what about we start next week?"

Amy nodded as she disappeared down the hallway but only to show again a few second later, "can I still come down to the study room tonight?"

Sara got up and giggled, "sure you can I expect you to help me with the computers when you're done talking to Carmen."

Amy left her room with a big smile on her lips.

Sara went down to the study room and waited for the other kids to show up, when everyone had arrived they slowly got started, two fifth grader were talking about their school project, - solar system, - Amy didn't say anything but followed their discussion very intensive. Meanwhile Sara had been surfing around on the internet she got up and excused herself and left the room and went down to Carmen's office and knocked on the door.

"Come in" she said.

"Hey, you got a minute?"

"Sure, come in Sara, heard your talk with Amy went fine," Carmen smiled.

A smile matching Carmen's played at her lips, "yeah, I think so."

"So what can I do for you?"

She bit her bottom lip and took a deep breath, "I was wondering if I could take my study group out on a field trip tomorrow."

"What precisely do you have in mind when you say a field trip?"

"The planetarium, the fifth graders have been working with the solar system in school this week."

Carmen's brows furrowed, "as voluntary worker here I'm not allowed to let you out on your own with the children and I think twelve kids is a bit much for one to handle."

Carmen thought for a moment, "You of course can take Amy since you're her mentor and your position as a city employee should clear you so you can bring the rest of the kids. But I still think twelve is too much for one but I'm off tomorrow and would love to tagalong, but…"

She hesitated only a second before continuing, "I'll have to say no, the Home simply can't afford a trip like that."

With a shifty glance and a facial expression looking a bit guilty Sara said, "Um… I kind of anticipated that so um… I have already bought a group ticket though the internet, and I happen to know that you also can by a cheap group ticket to the cable cars which" Sara quickly added, "I'm willing to pay for as well."

Carmen chuckled, "shall I expect you also have said it to the kids just to make sure I wouldn't say no?"

Sara bit down on her lower lip, "um, no not yet but if that's what it takes for you to say yes, well then…"

Carmen leaned back in her chair and laughed, "hmm, wonder how many would believe me if I told them I was being blackmailed by the law enforcement."

Sara shrugged and laughed, "Hopefully none, so can I tell the kids about our trip?"

Carmen shrugged her shoulders and chuckled "sure you can and I can promise you that the night watch goner love you for it since none of the kids will be able to sleep tonight in pure expectation."

"Sorry" Sara said without being even close to mean it she got up and left the office and went back to the children as she sat down one of the boys looked at her.

"Where have you been? I can't figure this one out," he said pointing in his book.

"I just went to talk with Carmen," Sara answered the boy.

Another boy looked at her, "are we I trouble?"

Sara winkled her brows before saying, "no, I just went to get her permission to take you all out on a field trip tomorrow afternoon."

At first the room turned silent, the children alternately looked at her and each other none of them quite sure that they had heard correctly.

Sean an eight year old boy just looked at Sara and said "huh?"

Carol a twelve year old girl also looked at Sara, "really?"

Dylan who was fifteen and the oldest in the group narrowed his brows, "hmm, weird usually we never go anywhere."

Amy who was sitting beside Sara pulled her sleeve to get her attention, "am I a part of the group?"

Sara smiled to her, "yes of course you are."

Amy smiled back at that, "so where are we going?"

Everybody looked at Sara at that question.

"To the planetarium," Sara answered a little nervous.

"Wow" one of the fifth graders said. Carol nodded "that could be fun. Cool with me," Dylan said "definitely sounds better than spending the whole day here."

"Well, all of you seemed very interested in the topic when we talk about it earlier so I thought the planetarium might be exciting to visit."

Rest of evening was spent talking about the upcoming trip and Sara was flooded with questions on what you could see there since none of the children ever had been there before.

It was twelve kids waited in suspense for Sara to arrive she barely made it inside before she was surrounded, Carmen eventuallytook pity on her and quiet them down and told them some ground rules for the trip and finally they went on their way. They arrived at the planetarium and went inside Sara picked up the ticket and went back to the group.

"The main show in the theater is in a half hour" he told them, "Do you want to look around until then?"

Most of them nodded so they walked down the dark halls they stopped in front of a bright sculpture of the solar system where a mechanical moon encircled the earth. Dylan pushed a button and Neil Armstrong's famous words wafted through the dark hall.

Sara looked at the group, "anyone who has a favorite planet?" She asked.

"Hmm, I like that one," Theo said pointing.

"Saturn" Sara smiled.

"I like the loops" Carol said.

"That's Saturn's rings" Sara corrected, "not loops." She glanced at her watch, "people, the show is about to start."

They sat in the theater, staring at the lit ceiling, which sparkled in comets and meteors and constellations, the children was enthralled by the spectacle and none of them said a word before an hour later when the show ended.

Afterwards the kids walked around the halls looking at the different sculptures again recognizing several of them on their own after watching the movie. Sara found Amy standing in front of the gift shop looking at some books standing on a shelf.

"Hi, let's go inside and see what they got."

They went over to the books Amy just had been looking at, "hey, this one looks good" Sara said, handing it to Amy to inspect.

Amy looked at it; "mmm" she said handing it back to Sara.

Sara narrowed her eyes, "Do you see anything else you like better?"

Amy shook her head, "no" she said seeming uneasy about picking something.

Sara took two copies and another book and paid for them before she caught up with Amy who was already leaving the shop.

"Here you go," Sara said handing Amy the book, "you goner need it when we start school," she smiled encouraging the girl to take the book.

Amy looked unsure at Sara but finally she took the book and pressed it tight to her chest whispering, "thank you!"

"You're welcome, kiddo."

When they reached the others Sara handed a book to Sean and Carol and told them it was for the study room so they could look at them next time they talk about solar systems.

Sara looked at the group, "so, anyone up for some ice-cream before we go back?"

Soon after anyone in the planetarium knew the answer to that question, they found a little shop further down the street that sold ice cream and soon after everyone was seated each one with their own ice-cream sundae. When all were done they went back to the Home, everyone thanked Sara for a fun day and went inside. She went by Ellen and Craig on her way home and picked up the books Ellen had managed to find.

Sara spent Sunday to clean her apartment scrubbing and dusting things that were already clean. Later she went to the mall, she wheeled her cart down the aisles through produce and picked up a bag of tomatoes, a bunch of grapes, apples and carrot. She stopped for a moment to think not really sure about what kids liked. She went by the big refrigerators and piled in juice, milk, eggs, and the rest of the essentials, bread, pasta and cracker with and without chocolate followed.

She dismissed meat, dinner would be pasta and tomato sauce sure all kids liked that, Sara ambled to frozen foods for ice cream, one thing she for sure knew Amy liked. She got all of the fixings for a sundae, done she headed towards the exit and watched the cashier ring up her purchases at the register.

When she got home, she unpacked her groceries, assorted boxes of school books and separated those they would be using as a start; she had looked up directions from her work to the Home and mapped out the route, done she plopped down on the couch with a cup of coffee, soon after she dozed off and didn't wake up again before it was time to leave for work.

The next day after getting some sleep Sara headed towards the Home to pick Amy up, she could feel the butterflies in her stomach, for some reason she felt both nervous an unprepared. Amy was standing on the landing in front of the Home with her recently acquired book, she waved as she recognized the SUV, Sara pulled over and jumped out and waved back.

"Hi, ready?" Sara asked.

"Hi, mmm" Amy nodded.

After securing Amy on the backseat she got into the driver's seat and looked at the girl in the rearview mirror, Amy was looking down on her book lying in her lap so she never notice Sara was driving them to the mall until she parked the car.

Amy glanced around and frowned, "the mall?" She looked inquiringly at Sara.

"Yeah" Sara smiled "think there are a few things you need before you are ready to start school."

Amy just shrugged and followed Sara, they went down to the bookstore and walked inside, Sara walked along the shelves until she found what she was looking for.

"The first thing you need is a backpack," she looked at Amy "so, which one do you like?"

Amy looked unsure at Sara who just smiled and nodded towards the shelves, so the girl turned her attention to the backpacks standing on the shelves in all kind of colors and sizes. Sara was quite surprised when Amy handed her a plain white one after using rather long time looking at a pink one.

Sara kneeled down and looked at Amy, "are you sure this is the one you ideally want?"

Amy shortly looked at the pink one, "its fine" she said.

Sara shrugged, "guess its okay but I don't think it's the one you prefer to have, so why don't you get the one you really want?"

"Because it's too expensive, the white is much cheaper," Amy finally blurted out.

"Mmm, but your first backpack is a big thing, and I promise you I can afford it, and it will make me happy if you take the one you really want instead of the cheapest."

Amy thought for a moment she looked back at the shelves and slowly she reached out and took down the pink one, "um, I think I like this the best."

Sara took it and looked at it, "yeah, I definitely think it's just the right color for you," she smiled. "Let's go find a pencil case and you goner need a pad or a spiral binding as well."

On their way to the counter they walked by some children's books, Sara stopped and looked at Amy, "I have always been fond of books what about you? Do you like them?" She asked as she took one out from the shelf and glanced at it.

Amy shrugged, "I guess I like the smell of them but we don't really have any at the Home."

Sara briefly closed her eyes and cursed herself for inadvertently underlining how it was to be living in a children's home. "Hmm, maybe we should change that a bit," she said wiggling her brows, "what about we buy a few books? And if you don't want to keep them when you're done reading them then you can place them in the study room for others to read."

Amy thought about it for a moment before nodding, "Yeah, we can do that."

"What do you think about this one?" Sara asked handing her the book she was holding in her hand.

"Milly, Molly," Amy read out loud before flipping the book around reading on the back.

"What is it about?" Sara asked.

"It's about two girl's adventurer and how they learn to deal with a lot of different things through the people they meet; they have different ethnicity and various multi-cultural friends."

"Sounds exciting," Sara smiled.

"Mmm," Amy answered lost in turning over the pages of the book.

Sara found three more from the series and took two copies of each, one for her and one for Amy sure about it were books Amy would want to discuss whenever she was done reading a chapter; they reached the counter and paid. Afterwards they went into another store to get a car seat for Amy so she would be safer in the car.

Sara looked at her watch and was quite surprised about how much time they had spent in the mall, "sorry kiddo, but I'm afraid that's all the school we reach today if we are to achieve back to study class in time."

Amy looked downcast, "are we going back now?"

"No, I thought we could find a place and get something to eat first, are you hungry?"

Amy shrugged, "I guess."

"Okay, so what kind of food do you like?"

"I like pizza" the girl giggled.

Sara chuckled, "pizza it is let's find a place where we can get some pizza."

They found a place and got something to eat before driving back to the Home, most of the kids were gathered in the study room when they arrived. Sean immediately came over to greet them, after saying hey to Sara his attention fully went on Amy.

"Whoa Amy that's a cool backpack you got there."

Amy's eyes were glowing, "yeah" she said grabbing Sean's sleeve and dragged him over to the little sofa, she opened the back and showed him the other things they had purchased, Sean took one of the books and started turn over the pages, Amy glanced at him "want to borrow one?"

"Nay" he said sounding not to convincing, "isn't it a girl's book?"

Amy looked very grown up at him, "it's about how you ought to treat other people not matter who they are and this applies equally as much for boys as for girls, don't you think?"

Sean shrugged, "yeah guess so" he smiled to Amy, "okay, can I borrow this one?" He asked holding one of the books up.

"Sure, then we can swap when we're done" Amy replied.

Sean looked towards the table where the others were gathered, "Hmm, guess we better join them."

They got up and went over to the others; soon Sean was doing his homework while Amy was reading in one of her books, she kept reading until one of the staff members came and fetched her because it was her bedtime.

Amy got up and looked at Sara, "will you pick me up tomorrow?"

Sara lightly shook her head, "no kiddo not tomorrow but I will be here Wednesday if you're up for it?"

"I am" she nodded, Amy briefly looked at her backpack, "and thank you."

"You're welcome kiddo, sweet dreams."

"Goodnight" Amy said walking out of the room.

**Tbc… **


	5. Chapter 5

_**Chapter 5**_

Rest of the week flew away; Sara had for a while thought about getting a new car the old one had turned out more than once lately that it wasn't as reliable anymore as could be desired, beside her car wasn't really a model that was build for transporting a child.

After spending some time on the internet Sara had finally narrowed it down to two cars it would either be a Chrysler PT Cruiser or a Jeep Liberty Limited 4x4, both seemed very similar more or less with the same equipment and same high standard in safety and price-wise close as well, so she decided to test drive them both before making up her mind.

There hadn't really been any big different between the cars the Chrysler was a bit larger but the Jeep was more than big enough so it had ended up being a few minor details that had settled it, specific it had been the big Sky Slide Roof and the Inferno Red Crystal Red color the Jeep came with that had made her choose that model. The car dealer had given her a fair price for her old car so a couple of hours later she had left the store in her new car.

Sara had accidentally overheard two children talking about Amy's upcoming birthday so she had called Carmen to find out how the Home celebrated a thing like that and it hadn't pleased her hearing the answer to that question.

The Home would buy her a little present and the kitchen would make her a layer cake and that would be it. The next day Sara had called Carmen again and asked if she could take Amy and the rest of the study group, and if Amy had other friends at the Home, out to celebrate her birthday.

Amy barely spoke a word to other than Sean, and Carmen who wasn't really that surprised about Sara's call, had said yes and would try to find someone that could tagalong. After talking to Ellen, who had suggested McDonalds, Sara had called them and booked a room for a birthday party. Afterwards she had found a bowling alley in walking distance from the McD and booked four lanes, and now she just hoped it would be something Amy would enjoy.

The day before Amy's birthday it hit Sara that she still hadn't bought her a present so she went to the mall, standing inside she realized she had absolutely no idea of what to buy a girl who was to turn six years old.

At first she thought about getting her a book but dismissed it, it had to be something special, so for a while she just walked aimless around. She thought about calling Ellen for advice but dismissed that as well, this was something she had to do herself. She came to a stop in front of a jewelry store; she looked through the shop window for awhile before going inside, one of the shop workers came over to her.

"Hello, can I help you?" The woman smiled.

"Hey, well I'm looked for a birthday present for a girl who's about to turn six years old, any suggestions?"

"Maybe" the woman answered, "any price limit?"

Sara shook her head, "no, not if you have the right thing."

The woman brought Sara over to some glass shelves, "a thing that's very popular among girls these days is a charm bracelet," she showed Sara some different models in gold and silver. "If it's something she is going to wear every day I will suggest silver since it is somewhat more hardy than gold.

Sara nodded, "well, I hope it's something she will like to wear every day, so I'll take the one in silver.

"Very well," the woman said, "do you want some charms to put on it?"

"Sure" Sara smiled, "what would you recommend? I'm not sure about what to put onto a thing like that."

The woman thought for a moment, "What's the girl's name?"

"Amy" Sara answered.

"Then maybe an A, when's her birthday?"

Sara nodded in agreement and answered "tomorrow."

The woman thought again, "that should make her a Scorpio."

"Yeah, and if I remember correctly mars should be her planet," Sara added. "And I better get a book while we're at it.

The woman was about to put the charms onto the bracelet but Sara stopped her and asked if she could wrap them in separately, the woman nodded and found one big and four small soft velvet boxes and wrapped each present in gift-wrapping paper suitable for a little girl.

Sara had arranged with Carmen to keep the birthdays party as a surprise, so none of the kids from the study group knew anything about it until a staff member came by their rooms and told them to change into their finest clothes and subsequently go down to the study room.

Everyone was in the room when Sara arrived she didn't tell them where they were going only it was a party for Amy and that she wanted them to come along and help her celebrating Amy's birthday which of course everyone wanted to help with.

They all stood at the bottom of the staircase while Carmen went to the girls room to pick her up and the minute they saw her they all started singing – happy birthday – Amy wasn't sure about what surprised her the most, the kids singing or the fact all of them was in their finest clothes. Sara met her on the last step.

"Hey kiddo, happy birthday" Sara smiled.

"Thank you."

"Are you ready to go celebrate?"

Amy's brows arched, "are we going somewhere?"

"Mmm, if you want too."

"Okay, where are we going?"

Sara wiggled her brows, "now that's a surprise you'll have to come along if you want to find out."

Amy just giggled as they all went out to the bus waiting for them, soon after the bus drove up in front of McDonalds, when everyone had left the bus Sean gazed at Sara.

"Are we going in there?"

"That was the plan" Sara chuckled, "unless you rather want to go back home to eat."

"Let's go" Dylan said walking towards the restaurant the rest of the children quickly following him.

Several staff members was standing in the door waiting for them and put a party hat on each one of them as they walked through the door, subsequently they were guided into a very nice decorated room, seated the waiter wrote down what soda each kid wanted and a few minutes later he returned with them. Amber the staff member that had come along gave Amy her present from the Home; Amy opened it and revealed a red sweater.

"Thank you" Amy said to Amber.

Dylan reached over the table, "here shortie, for you" he said looking a bit shy.

Amy opened it and found a little teddy with a chain and a hook, "thank you, Dylan" she said sending him a big smile.

"You're welcome shortie, think it's designed to hang on a backpack," he chuckled.

"I also have a little present for you," Sara said handing Amy a box.

Amy's eyes widen as she took the gift from Sara and they got even bigger when she opened it, "for me?" She breathed holding up the bracelet making the other ones gasping.

"Yes for you" Sara smiled, "it's a charm bracelet so I think something is missing," she said handing Amy another present.

While Amy unpacked the present Sara notice Sean was sitting looking a little sad and she instantly knew why. Gently she kicked his leg to get his attention and when he looked at her she handed him one of the present under the table.

At first he looked unsure but when Sara winked at him his face lit up in a smile, meanwhile Amy had opened her present and found a small Scorpio she furrowed her brows and looked inquiring at Sara.

"Your zodiac sign is Scorpio" Sara explained, "we all have one, which, depends on what time of year you were born, I for example is Virgo."

"Oh" the girl said.

"I'm an Aquarius," Dylan said.

Sean gazed at Sara, "what are you if you are born in July?"

"Depends on when in July you're born," Sara answered.

Sean narrowed his eyes slightly, "the twenty-fifth."

"Then you're a Leo."

Sara handed Amy another box.

Amy looked at her, her blue eyes sparkling in the light, "another one?"

"Mmm, let's see if you can figure that one out," Sara said.

Amy opened the box and looked inside, "um, I think it's a planet."

"Good" Sara said, "Any idea of which one?"

Amy shook her head.

"Its mars, just like we have a zodiac sign we also have a planet and yours is mars." Sara looked at the other kids, "and before you all start asking, it's a thing we can look up next time in class." Sara handed Amy the last box.

Amy opened the box and took out the A, "think I can guess this one" she smiled, "A for Amy."

"Mmm" Sara nodded.

"Thank you very much, Sara."

"You're welcome kiddo, and happy birthday."

Sean cleared his throat, "I also have a present for you with a little help from Sara," he said handing the box to Amy.

Amy opened it, "whao… Sean thank you it's a book," she said placing it on the bracelet beside the other ones, she got up and walked over to Sean and hugged him making his face all red.

"You're welcome" he stuttered.

The waiters began bringing the food in and soon after everyone was eating and having a good time, after eating the children played around until Amber and Sara gathered them and told them it was time to move on.

When they got outside the kids looked around wondering where the bus were but Sara just smiled and told them that the evening wasn't over yet and lead them down to the bowling alley, Sara went over to find out which lanes were theirs while Amber brought the kids over to the shoe shelves.

It had been a quiet start the children's insecurity by trying something new had showed through clearly all afraid to make a fool of themselves but after looking a little on the other lanes and seen that most others wasn't particularly good either they had finally thrown their inhibitions and gotten into the game and the rest of the game progressed under loudly laughing.

When time had expired all had gathered at a long table to round off the day with some well-deserved ice cream, when they got back everyone went into the study room to talk about their day before bedtime. Sara laughing had tried to convince them to do some homework but had been overruled by twelve children.

Soon after they got back Amber came into the room to fetch Sean and Amy so she could put them to bed, Sean smiled and said goodnight to Sara before running upstairs. Amy walked to the door and said goodnight but instead of walking out she turned and walked over to Sara and wrapped her arms around her neck and hugged her.

Sara who was totally unprepared for Amy's action simply wrapped her arms around the little body hugging her and hugged her right back. Until then their only physical contact was when Sara had put her hand on Amy's shoulder in the mall to guide her.

Sara had carefully avoided physical contact with the girl not sure how Amy would react to it, not sure how _she_ would react to it. But Amy hadn't given Sara any time to think only to react which she instinctively had done and much to her own surprise she had to admit it felt good and naturally to give Amy a hug.

"Thank you for a very lovely day," Amy whispered against Sara's neck, "and thanks for the presents."

"You're welcome sweetie, and thank you for wanting to spend your birthday with me."

Amy released Sara and went upstairs to her room. One by one the kids went up to their rooms, Dylan was the last one to leave the room he stopped in the doorway and gazed at Sara.

"You know, except for Sean I think you're the first one I have ever seen Amy hug it was really a nice thing you did for her today," he smiled and shrugged "but I guess I don't have to explain to you how much a thing like that means for kids like us, goodnight Sara, see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight Dylan," Sara barely managed to say almost wordless to Dylan's sharp perception.

The weeks flew by. Sara really enjoyed her job and as she had gotten to know her Teammates better it had turned out to be some great people. She always looked forward spending the afternoons with Amy. She had quickly discovered that Amy's intelligence was well above average and she had several times taken herself in thinking how much Amy reminded her of herself at that age.

One day in December Amy and Sara were sitting in her apartment Amy suddenly looked up from the book she was reading in and gazed at Sara.

"Do you have a family?"

Sara looked at Amy, "yes I do now but for many years I didn't have one."

Amy merely nodded and glanced at Sara, "how does your family celebrate Christmas?"

"Hmm, that's a good question I haven't celebrated Christmas with them since I was a little girl."

Amy glanced around, "do you decorate your apartment?"

"No, it's not something I've had the habit of doing, normally I'm use to work both Christmas night and Christmas day so guess I never saw any reasons for decorating, and I'm not even sure I know how to decorate a home."

"Are you also working this Christmas?"

Sara shook her head slowly, "unfortunately yes I am, it's my Team who has the watch this year, but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't have time to come by and wish you a merry Christmas."

"You know," Amy said looking around, "I could help you decorate if you want me too."

"You can?" Sara asked with a smile.

"Mmm" Amy nodded.

"Well, it will require a trip to the mall because I have nothing to decorate with."

Amy looked at the watch hanging on the wall, "well, I don't think we have time to do it today."

Sara also looked at the watch, "nope, but I'm off work Saturday, so perhaps we could do it there?"

"Well, I don't have any plans," Amy said.

Sara chuckled, "then Saturday it is. She got up, "want to help me make dinner?"

Amy nodded and got up and followed Sara to the kitchen, "what are we making?"

"Um, how does pasta and tomato sauce sounds?"

"Goood" Amy giggled.

Sara found all the ingredients they needed Amy helped putting the things for the tomato sauce into the food processor before sitting the table and soon after they were both seated and eating, afterwards they cleaned up and then it was time to go back to the Home.

As the evening progressed Sara couldn't help but wonder about Dylan's behavior, usually he was very indulgent towards the younger in the group, but the whole evening he had been grumpy and snapped at the others, so when the evening came to an end Sara had asked him to stay.

She narrowed her eyes and looked at him, "having a bad day?" She asked.

Dylan shrugged, "day, year, life take your pick," he answered without looking at her.

"Yeah, I know" Sara sighed, "but whatever is wrong cannot justify your way of treating the others the way you have been doing all night."

"I know" Dylan said "sorry."

"Well, I don't think I'm the one you should be apologizing to. So, want to tell me what have brought you into this very bad mood?"

Dylan finally looked at Sara, "do you know I'm been offered a full scholarship to a college in Tucson, Arizona, through my skills as a wrestler?"

Sara smiled "yes I have Carmen mentioned it one day I was talking to her." She furrowed her brows, "Er, I thought it was a good thing?"

"Oh, it is that's my ticket out of here," he shrugged "but like everything else in my life it's going down the drain."

Sara looked surprised at him, "why?"

Dylan shrugged "because I'm stupid."

"Who says you're stupid, Dylan?"

"No one" Dylan answered, "But the school not only expect you to be good at wrestling they also expect you to pass all your examination and I don't, I'm flunking physics." He shrugged despairingly, "so guess I can kiss that scholarship goodbye."

Sara breathed a sigh of relief, "why haven't you mentions this earlier, Dylan? The whole idea of me being here is coaching you guys through the homework you don't understand."

"Yeah I know but I don't think two hours a day is even close to being enough for me to get it, I mean it Sara, I really suck in physics."

Sara chuckled "at least you know it which gives us a huge advantage," she wiggled her brows, "time."

Dylan looked confused at her, "what do you mean?"

"The examiners don't start until next week so as from tomorrow you will come along for some private tutoring when I come by and pick Amy up."

Dylan paused a moment before adding tentatively, "what about Amy? I don't want to steal any time away from her."

"She'll be fine, Dylan" Sara insured, "think I can managed tutoring both of you at the same time."

"Okay, if you say so" Dylan got up and walked towards the door, "thanks for offering the help, Sara, goodnight and see you tomorrow" he said leaving the room.

After talking to Carmen about Dylan she went home and after a shower she went to bed.

The next day's went with a mix of physics and young children's books, Amy never said anything about Dylan's presence she just followed his work very interested which Sara took as a good sign. But not to disappoint Amy Sara had arranged with Dylan that he could take a hard-earned break Saturday and then they would use the entire Sunday to go over it all one last time.

As arranged Sara picked Amy up Saturday so they could go Christmas shopping at the mall for decoration.

Sara looked at Amy, "how knowledgeable are you in the area of Christmas decorations?"

Amy tilted her head, "hmm, think it's just about taking the things you like, a bit like when you asked me to pick the backpack I liked the best," she answered.

Sara chuckled to herself, Amy always impressed her with her straightforward way of seeing things, "yeah, guess you're right. Well, then we're better go find a cart and take a walk through the aisles and see if there's anything we like."

As they walked towards the first store Sara felt Amy's hand slip into her own. Amy looked nervously up at Sara but she just winked back at her and squeezed her hand lightly so they walked liked that until Amy needed both her hands to pick up Xmas decoration for closer studying.

They scouted the aisles stopping every so often when Amy found something she liked, after looking it over she would turn to Sara for her approbation before tossing the item in the cart and walk on to the next shelf in search for more ornamentation.

Having 'emptied' the shop they went back to unload they purchase into the car before going back to the next store and start all over again. After being through three stores Sara decided it was time to get something to eat, they found a little café in the shopping plaza and sat down outside watching the other traders.

Sara gazed at Amy, "so, do you think we have enough?"

Amy lightly shook her head from side to side narrowing her eyes, "hmm, I'm not sure we still haven't been it that store," she said pointing.

Sara's eyes followed the direction the girl was pointing, "The candy store? I don't think they have any Xmas paraphernalia," she chuckled.

Amy rolled her eyes at Sara, "of course they do," she said with a lot of conviction in her voice, "They both have candy canes and chocolate Santa Claus's and other stuff."

"Oh" Sara smiled, "guess we better take a look then."

Done eating they went into the candy store and soon after they left with several boxes of sugary confections and a Sara wondering when the word _no_ had left her vocabulary. After getting home and unloading the car Sara dropped down on the couch meanwhile Amy began unpacking all of their purchase onto the table.

Amy looked at Sara, "what's next?"

Sara shrugged and smiled, "guess you just put each ornament where you like it to be I don't think there's any order to it."

Amy nodded, "okay, want to help?"

"Sure" Sara answered getting up from the couch, they slowly began distribute the decorations around the apartment. "So, gotten started with your Christmas wish list?" She asked.

Amy shook her head, "no not yet."

Sara arched a brow, "well, there's only ten day to Christmas so I think Santa need to know soon."

Amy nodded but didn't say anything. They finished decorating the flat and afterwards they went to the kitchen and helped each other making dinner and soon after it was time for Sara to drive Amy back to the Home, but not before they had packed a back with decorations stuff for Amy to put up in her room.

Sunday went with physics only interrupted by short breaks for meals and Dylan was really beginning to get the hang of it, so Sara was quite confident when she drove him back that Dylan would pass his examiner the next day.

Since none of the children had homework up to the Christmas holiday they spent the last night to play various board games and drinking hot chocolate and eating popcorn.

Before leaving the Home Sara went by Carmen's office to hear if she could get a copy of the kids Christmas wish list. She had promised them to come by on Christmas Eve day to wish merry Christmas and had decided to buy each a small gift.

Carmen just small laughed while she made the copies she had long gone given up trying to tell Sara that it wasn't something she needed to do; Carmen put the copies into an envelope before handing them to Sara.

**Tbc… **


	6. Chapter 6

_**Chapter 6**_

Next day after cleaning her abode Sara was just about to sit down and look at wish lists when it knocked on the door.

"Hi sweetie, am I disturbing you?" Laura asked.

"Hi mom, no come on in I was just about to go over some wish lists."

On their way to the kitchen Laura looked around and chuckled, Amy helped decorating, huh?"

"Um-huh" Sara nodded as they sat down with a cup of coffee. "So, what brings you by?"

"Coffee," Laura chuckled, "no I've been in a computer store nearby so thought I would stop by and say hallo."

"Wow mom, are you finally getting a computer?" Sara laughed.

Laura rolled her eyes, "god no that's not for me, it's a Christmas gift for Ellen, a notebook I think it's called actually quite a small one." Laura nodded towards the envelope, "wishes from your study group?"

"Yeah" Sara confirmed opening the envelope, "thought I would buy each one a little something."

"Want me to help you go through them?" Laura asked.

"Sure" Sara answered.

"Hmm, it's not exactly cheap things they want," Laura said looking up from a list.

Sara shrugged, "it's okay if it costs a few bucks."

"Yeah, not that I know what it is but how much does an iPod cost?"

Sara laughed, "more than a few bucks, and it's a music box you can have in your pocket."

Laura arched a brow, "how do you listens to music if it's in your pocket?"

Sara smiled, "you plug in a headset."

"Oh" Laura said, "well, this one wants Disney stuff."

"Okay, Carol seems to be into Harry Potter," Sara said.

Laura giggled, "Here is an easy one it just says toys."

Sara picked up Amy's list anxious to see what she wished for but as her eyes followed the words on the page her face turned more and more pale she dropped the paper on the table and got up and went over by the window and just looked out.

Laura frowned; her eyes followed her daughter before she picked up the paper. _'Dear Santa'_ she read soundlessly, _'you can give my Christmas present to someone else all I wish for is a home and a family, Sincerely Amy.'_

Laura took a deep breath not really sure about what to say to her daughter, what could she say?! No word in the world could erase the pain Sara felt right now, so she stayed quiet and waited for her daughter to speak.

Sara felt nauseous her face was contorted pain coursed through her body as she remembered her own childhood. She felt her stomach sink and her heart break, how many times hadn't she wished for the same thing back then? …And been disappointed… just as Amy was about to be. This was neither a wish nor she or Santa could fulfill.

Sara went over and sat down, "life sucks" she blurted out.

"Yes, it sometimes does, I see prove of that every day, but sometimes life can be beautiful as well."

"Yeah right," Sara snorted, "try telling that to a six-years-old orphan girl, I'm sure she thinks life is wonderful" she sarcastic added.

Laura sighed, if there was one thing she quickly had learned about her daughter, it was, that it was almost impossible to talk any sense into her when she was in a bad mood.

"No she probably don't, but I actually think that she is more fortunate than most others in her situation she might as well been placed somewhere else much worse than where she is now, and I know The Rainbow Home do everything they can to find the children a new home, so although it isn't going to be before Christmas then I'm pretty sure that they will manage to find a new home for her."

Sara kept staring into space for awhile exhaling loudly; she knew her mother was right but still… "Yeah, I know you're right it's just… I still remember how it felt hoping and how much it hurt realizing it wasn't happening. I know how she will be feeling Christmas morning and I can't do a damn thing about it, and… that really sucks."

"Yes it does" Laura agreed, "but even you can't conjure," she paused biting her lower lip, "but now we are on the subject then there's something I've thought about for a while," Laura took a deep breath, "Sara, have you ever thought about adopting her yourself?"

That question completely shocked her. She'd never given much thought to a family before, beyond the recognition that her rare periods of sexual activity carried the chance of an accidental pregnancy.

Sara eyes widen and her mouth felt open as she looked at her mother in disbelieve sure she must have heard wrong or it was meant as a joke, except her mother wasn't laughing. Sara let out a few shaky breaths, trying to regain her composure wondering if her mother had lost her mind suggesting a thing like that.

She'd never considered herself good with children. She had always been uncomfortable around them and never felt they would like her. Just the thought of having a child the very idea of another human being looking to her for nurturing and guidance terrified her, one thing she at least knew for sure was, that kids needed so much more than she had to give.

Not even if it had gone far better than she had hoped it would. Amy actually seemed to like her and the feeling was mutual.

"No" Sara answered letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "I'm not what a child need" she simply stated, as calmly as she could.

Sara didn't even know if she wanted children, but she did know she wanted to at least have the option. Her past personal life hadn't been the greatest. At the very least, she intended not to make the same mistakes of burying herself in her new job. She was going to have a life outside of work.

Laura shrugged, "I think you're wrong sweetie, I believe you're everything she needs."

"Mom, I don't know how to raise a child on my own, not to mention my job. I can't leave a six-years-old child home alone because I'm called out to a crime," Sara sighed.

"Sara, if it should come down to that there isn't a thing you can't do on your own if you put your mind to it, but the fact is that you don't have to do it on your own anymore, you both have me and Craig to step in and help out whenever you need it. I know you're still trying to get use to it, but sweetie, you do have a family who's there for you."

Sara leaned back in her seat, "I know mom, but it's not only that. You know how it went last they tried to locate her and it was even with high qualified and experienced people, competences… or skills if you want, I'm not even close to possess. Sara paused for a moment, "and who says she even want to be with me, or even are ready to try another adoption?"

Laura tilted her head and looked at Sara, "sweetie, you already know the answers to those questions; I think the question is, are you ready?! Listen, I'm not trying to talk you into anything I was just wondering if it was something you had thought about considering you more or less spend all your spare time with her anyway. Then why not go the whole length?"

"I'm not using all my spare time," Sara protested.

Laura's brows arched, "um, how many days did the two of you spent together… hmm, let's say last week?"

"Six" Sara mumbled.

"Mmm, and it's probably the same for the week before and etc. and that's fine you are within your rights to decide how you use your free time," Laura smiled "and as I said it was just a thought." She picked up another letter, "better finish the list so you can go shopping," she teased knowing how much Sara disliked shopping.

Sara just scowled at her mother. While they finished the list they talked about Christmas, Sara asked if Laura perhaps could find someone at the hostel that could come by The Rainbow Home on Christmas Eve just for half an hour in the afternoon dressed up as Santa and hand out the gifts, which her mother thought should be possible. They ate lunch together before Laura went home and Sara went to the mall.

Christmas Eve started with Sara drove past the hostel around noon to deliver the bag with gifts and briefly talk with George who had promised to act as Santa Claus. Two hours later she drove to The Rainbow Home, she had a few days earlier through her mother given Dylan money so he could buy a small Christmas tree.

After arriving Sara and the kids used an hour decorating the study room and the tree, Sara went to the kitchen and found a bowl and filled it up with various kinds of candy and chocolate and finally they all sat down and listened to Sara reading out loud – A Christmas Carol, by Charles Dickens. –

When she was done they spent time talking about what the story meant until Santa Claus interrupted them, the little ones could barely believe their own eyes whereas the elderly just smiled and went along with it.

Santa sat down in a big armchair; Sara had put a little note on each present so George could say a few words to each child before handing them their gift, so he began calling a child to him one by one.

Carol was told about magic referring to the Harry Potter stuff she was receiving, Sean heard about racing referring to the red (Disney) car he was about to get, Dylan looked totally confused over his story about going deaf if you stayed to long in too much noise until he opened his present and found an iPod.

Amy hesitating walked over to George when he called for her, not really expecting anything since she hadn't wished for things, opposite of what he had done to the others he leaned forwards and whispered her story to her.

"I know what you wished for, but a wish like that takes a while longer to fulfill than you gave me, but I promise I won't forget your wish, and you know? Christmas isn't the only time of year where wishes can come true." George handed her a present, "so even if you didn't wish for a gift I think you deserve to get one today, anyway," he smiled "hope you like it."

Amy slowly opened the present and revealed Milly, Molly dolls, "thank you, Santa," she said before going back to her seat.

George continued to share gifts, Sara went over and sat down beside Amy and looked at her, "something you wished for?" She asked nodding towards the dolls.

Amy shook her head, "no didn't even knew you could get them as dolls, but I like them," she said giving Sara half a smile, she got up "think I'll place them in my room now," she said and left the room.

Sara briefly closed her eyes, even if Amy had smiled it was the sadness in her eyes that had burned itself into Sara's heart, the thing she had feared the most had just been confirmed, and it hurt.

Dylan came over and sat down, "she'll be fine" he said as if he could read Sara's thought, "the first Christmas is always the worst."

Sara nodded, "yeah… so like your present?"

"Yep, seems good old Santa is all-knowing after all," he paused, "unless, someone has gossiped to him," he small-laughed.

Sara chuckled, "yeah, guess you never know," she got up "better get Santa on his way there are probably other children who want to get their presents as well."

Dylan just chuckled and shook his head as he watched Sara walking over to Santa well aware of who the real Santa was.

Sara thanked George for his fine work but he was just happy to help and promised to return the suit back to the rental store.

Sara looked at her watch she was suppose to relieve Doug at the lab at 7 p.m., she wished the kids a merry Christmas and went upstairs to look for Amy and found her in her room.

"Hi you" Sara's voice was soft and comforting.

A brief smile appeared on Amy's lips "hi."

Sara walked in and sat down on the edge of the bed, "I have to leave now and go to work but not before wishing you a merry Christmas and give you your present," she handed the girl a little box, "merry Christmas, Amy."

Amy took the box and put it down on the bed without opening it, "thank you Sara, and merry Christmas to you too," she said.

Sara frowned, "you don't want to open it?"

Amy shook her head, "no."

Sara licked her dry lips and spoke quietly, "why not, Amy?"

"Because" she said fighting with the tears in her eyes, "you ain't suppose to do that before Christmas morning," her voice barely a whisper as she added, "with your family."

The sight in front of her simply broke something inside of Sara and made her act before thinking, she picked Amy up and placed her on her lap and just held her close.

Amy covered her head on Sara's shoulder as a wave of tears began to overtake her small body. Sara just kept holding the girl and gently brushed her hand over her hair until she stopped crying fighting with her own tears not to fall.

"Sch baby" Sara soothed and again without thinking her started talking, "listen sweetie, I know it's not the same, but it will really make me and my family happy if you will spend Christmas day with us, they really want to meet you."

"They do… really?" Amy sniffled against Sara's neck.

"Yes they do, I have told them so much about you and how sweet you are, so they are really looking forward to meet you."

Amy picked her head up from Sara's wet shoulder and gazed into her eyes, "you have told them about me?"

"Yes of course I have," Sara said wiping Amy's wet cheek with her hand, "sweetie, you're a lovely sweet and bright kid and a big part of my life, so don't think I could stop telling about you even if I tried," she smiled.

"You think I'm those things?" Amy asked.

Sara started tickling Amy until she laughing dropped onto the bed; "nay" she said wiggling her brows, "I know so." She got up from the bed, "I have to leave now or I'm going to be late, kiddo."

"Okay" Amy said handing Sara the box, "Will you hide it until tomorrow?"

Sara took the box, "sure sweetie, see you tomorrow at 8 a.m.," she said walking towards the door.

"Okay, see you tomorrow."

On her way to work Sara called her mother to tell her that she was bringing Amy with her and listed up all the things she needed her mother to go buy for her. Laura had just chuckled and told Sara she was a fast learner when it came to using her family to do things for her, but had promised to get the things Sara needed and she would call Craig to let him know Amy was coming.

Sara picked Amy up at the arranged time after driving awhile and sure about it wasn't the road to Sara apartment Amy looked at Sara through the rear-view mirror and asked, "Where are we going?"

Sara caught Amy's eyes in the mirror and smiled, "we are going to my brother and his family."

"Oh" Amy said.

Sara suddenly realized that Amy didn't know anything about her family so she started telling her about it, "my brother's name is Craig and he is married to Ellen and together they have two children, Allison who's about fifteen months older than you and Ian who's nine years old and then my mother will be there, oh, and of course their cat Garfield" Sara giggled, "you'll figure out why he's called that when you see him."

Amy narrowed her eyes, "bet his red and fat," she small-laughed.

They soon after arrived at Craig's house and went inside. Amy half hiding out behind Sara feeling a bit uncertain and shy suddenly to be the center of everyone's attention, but it only lasted until Allison grabbed her hand and dragged her into the living room to show her the Christmas tree simultaneously crying out to the adults that it was presents time.

They all sat down except Craig who went over to the tree and found a present to each of the kids to shush them down. Amy looked genuine surprised getting another present than the one Sara had given her the day before. She read the little card that was attached to the gift saying from Laura.

"Wiiii…" Allison shouted, "I got the doll I wished for," she gazed at her brother, "what did you get?"

"The light sword I wanted," Ian answered.

Allison looked at Amy, "what about you?"

"A diary with a padlock," Amy said with a big smile.

"Cool" Allison answered waving for Amy to come over, "you're turn to pick a gift."

Amy just looked confused at her, "huh?"

Allison smiled, "just take a gift and give it to the name on the card."

"Oh, okay" Amy said, she took a gift and went over and gave it to Ellen, "for you" she smiled.

And so it went on for the next forty-five minutes but finally all the presents were handed out, Amy was sitting on the floor beside Allison with a pile of presents in front of her almost too overwhelm to believe they were all hers.

Allison gazed at Amy's presents, "did you really wish for books?" She asked with a hint of aversion in her voice.

"Mmm" Amy said, "I like books, I like the way a new book smell and the little squeak sound it makes the first time you opens it."

"You sounds like Aunt Sara," Allison laughed "that's something she would say."

Amy gazed at Allison, "don't you like books?"

Allison narrowed her eyes, "hmm, some I guess especially if they are funny." Allison got up, "want to see my room?"

Amy nodded and rose, "sure."

Just as they were about to leave the living room Ellen's voice reached them, "girls, breakfast before playing."

Allison turned towards her mother, hands on her hips, her head slightly tilted, rolling her eyes, "mom, do you think breakfast can wait two minutes? This is actually important, just so you know."

Laura left the room to hide her laugh, Sara had to bite into her lips not to burst out in laughed, Ellen swallowed hard to keep a straight face, "fine, but both of you will be at the table in two minutes."

"Yeah, yeah" Allison waved as they left the room.

Soon everyone was gathered around the dinner table talking and eating breakfast together, now and then Sara peeked at Amy and it made her glad to see that the girl seemed to be comfortable around her family. After eating the girls disappeared back to Allison's room, the boys went outside to try out Ian's new football, the three women kept sitting at the table with another cup of coffee.

Ellen looked at Sara, "she is really a sweet little girl no wonder you like spending so much time with her," she said.

Sara was about to answer but instead she got very aware of the dialogue between the two girls now sitting on the living room floor playing.

"Just wait until you see our church it have some really beautiful paintings on the walls."

"Are we going to church?" Amy asked.

"Mmm" Allison nodded, "in the afternoon we do it almost every year." She looked at Amy, "do you believe in god?"

Amy stayed quiet for a long time but finally she nodded, "yes I do, I can't hate him if I don't believe in him," she stated firmly.

Allison's mouth felt open and her eyes widen, "you hate god?" She asked in disbelieve, "why?"

Amy shrugged but didn't say anything, Sara was about to get up and go into the living room well aware why Amy wasn't answering but her mother's hand stopped her; Allison crawled over and placed herself beside Amy.

"You know" Allison said given Amy a little smile, "sometimes I think it's okay to hate another person even if mom says it not," Allison moved closer, "once I yelled at god and told him I hated him for giving me the most stupid brother on earth," she entrusted Amy.

Amy gave her half a smile and swallowed hard, "I hate god because he took my family," she confessed in a low voice.

Allison frowned, "that wasn't nice of him" she said comforting, "no matter what mom says I wouldn't like him either if he did that to me."

None of the girls said anything for a while both seemed caught up in their thoughts, "maybe" Allison hesitantly began, "you can ask god for a new family when we get to church?"

Amy slowly shook her head, "no, I don't think that's a good idea, I already did that once but I really didn't like the family he gave me."

Allison narrowed her eyes, "maybe he didn't knew what you wanted, it may be like when you wish for a new thing like a doll, you have to say what kind you want and size and what eye color."

Allison got up and ran into her room and returned with a felt-tip pen she picked up Amy's diary and went back on the floor and handed the diary and pen to Amy with a smile.

"Let's write down what kind of family you want," she suggested.

Amy looked uncertain at her, but Allison just nodded encouraging, so slowly Amy began writing with an Allison watching, at some point Allison interrupted.

"You want to be allowed to go to school?" She asked with a surprisingly voice.

"Yes" Amy answered, "Unless I can't ask for that?" She added.

"Oh, you can," Allison nodded eager, "I just don't understand why anyone would ask for that."

"You don't like school?" Amy asked almost speechless.

Allison shrugged, "guess some of it is okay, but I really hate math," she admitted.

Amy's eyes widen, "I love math in contrast to almost anything else there's only one right answer to the question."

Allison started laughing, "yeah, but the problem is to find that answer" she said, "and I don't seem to have much luck in that department."

"It's actually not that difficult" Amy said, "you just split it in small bites instead of trying to solve all at once."

Allison giggled, "You sound just like Aunt Sara," she arched a brow as her eyes glanced over the things Amy had written down, "hmm, you know" she said, "a lot of the things you have written down actually fits fine on Aunt Sara."

Amy slightly jumped by Allison's word but she didn't say anything, and Allison didn't seem to notice she just kept talking.

"Perhaps we can ask god for Aunt Sara? Then I will also be your family which means we can play all the time," she paused "and maybe you could help me with my math," she hesitating added.

Amy looked doubtfully at Allison, "I don't think it works like that, I'm not sure you can ask for a specific person," she lowered her voice, "not even if you like that person a lot."

"Of course you can" Allison said confident, "my mom says you can say or ask god about anything" she insured, "so let's try it when we get to church?" She smiled urging.

Amy lightly nodded, "okay, guess we can try it if your mom says it's all right" she answered.

"Good" Allison smiled, "hey, want to see my diary?"

"Sure" Amy answered. They got up and disappeared into Allison's room.

"Shit!" Ellen said burying her head in her hands, "I never meant 'asking god' as using him as a wish list" she explained, "maybe we should cancel the trip to church just to avoid the girls are disappointed."

Sara didn't heard a word of what Ellen was saying her mind were still focus based around the conversation she had overheard trying to organize all the thoughts it had result in.

"No" Laura said, "I don't think that will be a good idea, the girls will just start questioning why we're not going."

"Yeah, they probably will" Ellen sighed.

The boys came back in and soon after everyone were busy with either making lunch or playing with the children until they once again were gathered around the dinner table eating. Ian talked very enthusiastic about his new football, Allison looked forward to church and asked when they were leaving, and were told it wasn't before 4 p.m.

Laura gazed at Sara, "are you going to church with us? Or when do you have to leave for work?"

"I have to skip church," Sara answered "I have to be at the lab at 4 p.m. we have shared out the day between us so I have to be there to 8 p.m."

Amy looked crestfallen down at the table until Allison spoke up, "can Amy stay while you're working, Aunt Sara?"

"Well" Sara said, "I think it's up to Amy to decide whether she likes to stay or go home."

"Do you come back when you're done working?" Amy asked nervously.

"As soon I'm off work" Sara promised.

Allison strongly nodded to Amy, "okay, then I will like to stay and go to church with Allison" Amy said with a resolute voice.

They all left the house at the same time Sara going to work, the rest to church, but not before Sara had handed Amy a piece of paper with her phone number on so she could call if she needed to talk to her.

Laura caught up with Sara as she reached her car, Laura handed her a envelope and wished her a merry Christmas before going back to the others, but Sara who was already running late just put it in her back pocket and left.

**Tbc…**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Chapter 7**_

After sending John home she sat down the day's event still on her mind, Amy had surprised her in so many ways during the day but definitely in a positive way. As she shifted a bit in the chair she got conscious about the envelope in her pocket she took it out and opened it.

A yellow Post-It with her mother's handwriting saying _"just in case"_ was stocked on the first page she moved it and read the headline. _'Guidance on completing an adoption application.'_ Sara briefly flicked through the pages before putting them aside.

According to John it seemed like anyone had decided to behave this Christmas which of course was a good thing but it didn't leave her with much else to do than looking over some old case files.

Although she tried to ignore the papers from her mother her eyes kept drifting back to them, sighing she leaned back and with a slightly trembling hand she picked them up and began reading them carefully.

Without really thinking about it Sara picked up a pen and began to fill in the blanks: The work section was easy - it was a strange but nice feeling to fill the section about her own family and opportunities of help from them - she had come to a stop when she reached the housing section.

Her flat did have a spare room but it simply wasn't built for housing two people so again without really thinking about it Sara logged onto the internet and began to research the North Beach real estate market, after an hour of searching, she had managed to reduce ten houses to three very different houses.

The first one was a typical American townhouse in the heart of the city.

The second one was more a mix of Spanish and Mexican style and the biggest one but also the one of the three who was most impractical placed in relation to her work and the rest of the family.

The last one was in Greek style and had immediately captured her eye; it was built with rustic stone and tiles from Greece. It had a large enclosed garden with a large terrace covered with Greek flagstones, from what Sara could see in the pictures several of the rooms inside had floor tiles and stonewalls which gave the house a raw and yet very rustic appearance. It appeared to be a very open house, the kitchen, dinner and living room area sort of melted together yet the big granite pillars to bear the roof seemed to give the feeling that you went from room to room.

Even if it wasn't the biggest of the houses there would be more than enough room for two people, the house was lying in a closed residential neighborhood and almost in the middle of Craig and Laura's home and not too far away from her job either.

It wasn't the cheapest house, but entering Harvard on a full scholarship had never prevented her to take jobs wherever she could but instead of putting the money in the bank she had chosen to invest them. So years of living like a poor college student and investing like a pro and chosen stocks that had soared during the late-nineties bull market had paid off handsomely so there was more than enough in her savings for a nice house, she wrote down the realtors name and number before closing the internet.

The next couple of sections was mostly financial related so it wasn't really before Sara reached the last section - application regarding random or specific selected child - Sara began to think about what she was doing.

Subsection one to four was regarding random child so that she could skip. Subsection five referred child's name and current residence; - subsection six referred to the adopter's prior and present knowledge regarding the child,- but what made Sara very conscious about the whole thing was the last question: Subsection seven referring to the adopters contribute according to the child's need and qualifications in safeguard and serves it interests.

Sara pondered over the question for a while when all else had failed she had always turned her trust to science for answers but this was one thing were science couldn't help her.

If there were something she had learned and learned fast it was that no matter what road she traveled in her live, each path lead to misery in the end. So, she had always thought it was for the best she continued on her own …really not felt like she had no other choice.

Sara knew that had lived with it for so long it almost had become her own invisible follower, but it would never fail to show up as a reminder every time she had moved on or, a huge ball of emotions ran through her, more correctly every time she had fled.

She sighed so how could she even be considering bringing a child into her life; she knew all too well how difficult it was to allow any touch without suspicion when you had been touched by violence. And yet something in Amy spoke to Sara, even if she were unable to define it she had never felt awkward or uncomfortable around the girl. It had been so naturally and easy holding her hand or giving her a comforting hug, actually it had made her feel more alive than ever.

Coming to think about it her life had never been so solid and stable and… and happy as it was right now, a little smile crossed her lips as she remembered a thing Brass once told her after a tough case._"If you dare to look, if you dare to choose, ultimately, it doesn't matter what shitty things life brings you, because it does give back something good." _

She, of course hadn't believed him at the time just thought it was a whole lot of crap but now… now things were different… now she wasn't so sure anymore, maybe he actually had been right, maybe… maybe it was time for her to let go of all the painful memories of the past and start believing in herself and her ability's and look towards the future.

Sara sat straight up and with a determined look on her face she filled out the last field before putting the application back in the envelope.

She almost jumped out of the chair when Joe's voice sounded in the room she'd been so caught up in filling the application form that she hadn't noticed the time, they talked for a little while but since there wasn't anything to hand over Sara was soon on her way back to her brothers house.

Sara was greeted by two vivacious little ladies telling her about church and what else they had been up to while she had been gone.

"We saved you some dinner" Amy told.

"Mmm, and some dessert too" Allison added.

They dragged her to the kitchen where Ellen already had started heating the food and soon after Sara were seated at the table eating with a girl on each side of her telling her some more about their trip to church.

Amy had been very impressed about the painting on the walls and the priest's story about why they were celebrating Christmas. Allison got up and went to the bathroom; done eating Sara leaned back in her chair and gazed at Amy.

"Have you had a good day, kiddo?"

"Yes" Amy nodded "am I going back now?" she asked sadly.

"No, not yet unless you want too" Sara quickly said, "I meant it as being here all by yourself" she smiled while ruffling Amy's hair.

"Well, I missed you a bit" Amy admitted, "But you have a nice family, Allison is really cool to hang out with."

Sara smiled "yeah, you two seems to have fun together," she giggled "even if she doesn't like books or math."

Allison sat down again and rolled her eyes, "Aunt Sara, it Christmas vacation which means no talking about school or homework."

Sara burst out laughing, "Yes!"

Allison nodded encouraging to Amy but she just shook her head, after signaling forth and back a few times they were finally interrupted by Sara's voice, "so which one of you are going to speak up? You clearly have something you want to say or ask."

Amy just looked down on the table so Allison finally decided to speak up, "Aunt Sara, can Amy stay for a sleepover?" She quickly added, "You can stay as well I'm sure mom doesn't mind you sleeping in the guestroom."

Before Sara could say anything Allison yelled out, "mom, can Sara sleep in the guestroom?"

Ellen came into the kitchen, "Allison, what are you shouting about?"

"Amy and I want to sleep together so can Aunt Sara stay as well?"

"Have you asked Sara about it?"

Allison turned her head towards Sara who looked at Amy, "do you like to stay, sweetie?"

Amy smiled shyly and shifted her weight nervously, "yes, but only if you stay."

"Can she mom?" Allison pleaded.

Ellen nodded quickly and smiled, "of course she can but it's not mine its Sara's decision."

Laura had entered the room wondering what all the fuss was about; both Amy and Allison looked at Sara holding their breath, "its fine with me b…" was all Sara managed to say before Allison's jubilant shout interrupted her.

"Allison calm down now" Ellen said, "and let Sara finish what she was trying to say."

"As I was saying" Sara smiled, "its fine with me but I have to call the Home first and get their permission before I say yes."

"Okay Aunt Sara, want me to get your phone for you?"

Ellen was about to raise her voice at Allison but Sara just winked at her and looked at Allison, "sure kiddo it's in my jacket."

Allison ran into the hall and took the jacket and returned and handed it to Sara, she picked out the phone and pressed in the number to the Home, it was Carmen who answered.

"Hey Carmen its Sara."

"Hey Sara, is everything okay?"

"Yes everything is fine, I was just wondering if I could keep Amy overnight, she and my niece is really hitting it off and would like to have a sleepover."

"I'm glad to hear that Sara, unfortunately I can't give you permission for that."

"What? Why not? It's only for one night" Sara said as she got up from the chair.

"I'm sorry Sara, but there are rules I have to comply. You as well as I firsthand knows how the system works and I do not have permission to let the children stay overnight outside the home not even though I trust you."

Sara massaged her temple. She knew all of this too well, once she had lived it now she worked in it or against it and now… this… it was as if all of the injustices of the system were hitting her at that very moment… and suddenly every frustration was getting a voice.

"That's bullshit Carmen, I know for a fact the Smith family kept her overnight several times, so I don't see why I can't" Sara said with an ice-cold voice.

Carmen ignored Sara's voice knowing that she just felt frustrated, "yes they did" she answered, "but it's completely different rules that apply when it's an adopter who has the child" she calmly explained.

Sara briefly looked at Amy while listening to Carmen's explanation and what she saw almost broke her heart and all she could hear was this voice that kept telling her.

_Don't waste this opportunity; you'll never know if you'll get another._

"So unless you're…"

She stood motionless for what seemed to be an eternity. Her mind was racing "I will…" she cut her off.

Sara felt like the words were being yanked from her throat she closed her eyes wondering if she actually had said it out loud, but the "what?" she heard Carmen say seconds later confirmed she had.

"I will" Sara repeated, "I mean… I am I have already filled out the application form and I'm happy to come by with them if needed."

She picked the envelope from her jacket and took the papers out she felt both scared and elated as she looked them over one last time before signing the last page.

Carmen had finally found her voice again, "no Sara that won't be necessary, and I'm glad to hear you have come to that decision I think it will be good for the both you."

"Yeah, I hope so too" Sara said, "we will come by tomorrow for a talk."

"See you tomorrow and merry Christmas, Sara."

"You too" Sara said closing the phone.

She turned around and came face to face with her whole family but the only one she had eyes for were Amy it wasn't until now she realized she had heard the whole conversation and uncertainty and guilt suddenly overflowed Sara for making a decision without even asking Amy if it was something she wanted.

Amy's facial expression was something between shock confusion and disbelieves her mind not quite able to comprehend what she just had heard but when she saw Sara kneel down reality finally dawned on her.

Amy slowly began walking towards her and not even the tears rolling down the girls' cheeks could hide all the emotions going through her little body she never hesitated or stopped she kept walking directly into Sara's open arms and wrapped her own arms around her neck as she felt Sara's closing around her body.

Sara just held her close as Amy cried into her shoulder she fearfully wondered what was going through Amy's mind.

"Damn, god works fast" Allison blurted out in a low voice.

The adults so caught up in the scenario outplayed in front of them that none of them notice to tell the girl to watch her languish.

"Amy! Are you all right?" Sara asked her voice betraying and exposing her own raw emotion. "I'm so sorry, sweetie" she continued anxious, "I should have asked you first before saying anything to Carmen."

"You… you want me to come live with you?" Amy muffled against Sara's neck.

"Yes, I would like that very much" Sara paused, "but it's up to you baby, whether you want to be a part of my live or not, but I will love having you as my child."

"Why… me?" Amy sniffled "I'm not anything special."

"Amy!" Sara called her name until she lifted her head up and they were face to face, "don't say that you are the sweetest and smartest child I have ever met and being with you always makes me happy so to me you are the most lovely and special kid in the world."

Amy buried her face in Sara's shoulder once more and slowly let Sara's words sink in, satisfied she nodded and smile, "I want to live with you too" she whispered.

"Sure?" Sara asked relieved.

"Mmm" Amy confirmed "that's what I asked god for in church" she told.

"Nice to know he listens" Sara smiled.

Craig chuckled at that knowing Sara would put science above god any day, "well Cupcake, about time you came to your senses" he smiled.

"Think we all could use some coffee on top of this" Ellen smiled walking over to the coffeemaker.

Amy raised her brows "Cupcake?" She giggled.

"Mmm" Sara chuckled, "according to Craig I was always eating cupcakes when I was around your ages so he thought it was the perfect nickname for me."

"And he calls me whirlwind and Allison is pumpkin" Ian laughed "and mom is his wildcat."

"And you…" Sara said as she got up bringing Amy along and lifted her above her head, "also has a nickname" she giggled wiggling her brows.

"What is it?" Amy asked holding her breath in suspense.

"You are my Sunbeam" Sara smiled.

Amy thought for a moment before lighting up in a big smile, "I like that" she said.

Sara pulled her in for a hug, "good so do I" she said before putting the girl back on the floor.

"Coffee is ready" Ellen Said "anyone up for some ice-cream?"

They all were so soon all were seated around the table talking about this and what and eating ice-cream, Amy was gradually having a hard time keeping her eyes open after eating her ice she crawled onto Sara's lap and leaned against her, Sara wrapped her arms around her and it didn't take long before Amy was fast asleep. Allison who was just as tired as Amy curled up on her father's lap and was soon asleep as well.

"Think we better postpone the sleepover" Sara said. "Ellen, can I borrow some of Allison's night clothes and some underwear and a t-shirt?" She asked.

"Sure" Ellen got up and found the things.

"Thanks" she said as she got up, "better get her home, night everyone."

Amy slept through the drive home; it wasn't before Sara placed her on the couch she woke up.

"Where are we?"

"Home sweetie" Sara smiled.

"What about the sleepover?"

"Allison felt asleep as well so we decided it could wait," Sara looked at her, "there are some night clothes in the bag why don't you put that on while I make your bed."

Sara tucked Amy in and stayed in the room until she felt asleep again she kept a little light on just in case Amy would wake up during the night and finally she went to her own room and collapsed on the bed to emotional drained to even think and it didn't take long before she was fast asleep.

Sara slowly woke up as the sun reached her face it didn't take long before she was aware that she wasn't alone in the room, she opened her eyes a bit just enough to see Amy's silhouette.

"I know you're awake" Amy giggled.

"Do you now" Sara smiled pulling the girl down beside her and tickled her, Amy just laughed, she stopped tickling, "slept well, Sunbeam?"

"Mmm" Amy nodded trying to catch her breath.

"Good. Hungry?"

"Yeah a little" Amy answered.

"Uh, how do pancakes sound?"

"Goood" Amy said jumping out of bed.

They went to the kitchen Sara got the coffeemaker started and found the ingredients for pancakes and some apple juice and soon after they were both seated at the table eating. Afterwards they went to the bathroom Sara filled the little tub and help Amy taking a bath and dry up before sending her to her room to dress up while she took a shower.

Sara found Amy in the living room reading in one of the Milly, Molly books, she looked at her watch, "ready to go, sweetie?"

Amy looked up, "where are we going?"

"Back to the Home I promised Carmen to come by today."

"Am I going back?" Amy nervously asked.

Sara sat down on the table in front of her, "only if you want too."

"No, I want to stay with you."

Sara gave her a smile, "and I want you to stay, but I need to talk to Carmen about how to do this the right way, and you goner need your things too."

Amy nodded and got up and followed Sara down to the car, they arrived at the Home and went inside.

Sara looked at Amy, "why don't you run up to your room and start placing the things you want to bring with you on the bed while I go talk to Carmen?"

"Okay, can I find Sean first and tell him I'm moving?" Amy asked.

"Yes you can" Sara smiled, "I'll come find you when I'm done."

"Okay" Amy said running up the stairs, Sara walked to Carmen's office and went inside.

"Hey Sara come on in."

"Hey" Sara placed the envelope on the desk and sat down.

Carmen looked the papers over, "well everything looks find except you haven't put down and address."

"I know" Sara answered, "but my apartment isn't suitable for two people so I'm buying a house but ´cause to Christmas I haven't been able to get in contact with the realtor so I can't close the deal before tomorrow provided that Amy likes the house, otherwise we'll have to find another one."

"You're letting a six-year-old child decide what house to buy?" Carmen small laughed not really that surprised.

Sara arched a brow, "Yes, I want her to grow up in a house she likes, to give her some good childhood memories to think back on. Actually…" she paused "I think it will be good for both of us to start out in a place that's new to both of us. So, how does this works?"

"Well, a lot of the things we can skip since you already have been through it, I will send a copy of your application to Amy's caseworker she will then regularly visit over the next six months and if she finds everything satisfactory she will recommend the adoption set for approval and when you sign the adoption papers is a reality."

"And that's it?" Sara asked surprised.

"Yes that's it" Carmen smiled, "so, is she staying until you can get the house?"

Sara shook her head, "No, I promised she didn't had to and my apartment has a spare room so we'll manages until we can get the house, she is upstairs right now packing the things she wants to bring along," Sara gazed at her watch, "so if we're done I better go help her" she smiled.

Carmen nodded, "we are, and hopefully I'll still see you after the holiday."

"Yeah about that, you will but I'm afraid I'm going to cut down the number of days I can come by to two."

"That's fine Sara it's still better than nothing, now go enjoy the rest of the holidays."

Sara got up and went upstairs to find Amy; she was standing looking into her wardrobe, her backpack and a few other things already lying on the bed. Sara walked over and stood beside her and looked at the clothes, most of it seemed old something that was passed on from some of the older kids, which Sara remembered all too well.

She looked at Amy, "anything you just can't live without?"

Amy wrinkled up her nose, "no not really."

"Then let's take a few things so you have something to put on and let the rest stay here for others to use" Sara said "then you and I can take a trip to the mall tomorrow and buy you a new wardrobe."

Amy smiled a little shy, "can I get something in pink?"

Sara chuckled "you can get whatever color you like," she began putting the stuff into a bag, done she gazed back at Amy, "anything else you want to bring along?"

Amy shook her head, "nope that's it."

Sara wrinkled her brows, "what about your books? Milly, Molly books?" Amy looked down on the floor and mumbled something. Sara went over to her, "what baby?"

"I gave them away" Amy said, "to Sean so he wouldn't be so sad about me leaving," she looked at Sara, "are you mad at me now?"

Sara bent down, "no I'm not mad at you sweetie, first of all I think that was very sweet and thoughtful of you, second of all it's your books so what you choose to do with them is entirely up to you, and you still have a copy of them at home, Sunbeam," Sara smiled. "So, he got a little sad, huh?"

"Yeah" Amy nodded, "he's happy for me but he said he's going to miss me, so I um," she looked unsure at Sara, "I promised I would come by and visit him."

"And you will" Sara assured her, "you just let me know when you want to visit him and I'll drive you, okay?"

"Okay" Amy smiled, "can we leave now?"

"That we can" Sara answered pointing at the door, "after you my darling!"

On their way home Sara looked at Amy through the rear-view mirror, "are you up for a little detour? I have something I like to show you."

"Sure, what is it?" Amy asked.

Sara wiggled her brows, "you'll see when we get there."

"Hmm" Amy narrowed her eyes, "not even a hint?"

"Too late" Sara chuckled as she pulled over and stopped the car, she got out and went to the back and helped the girl out of the car.

Amy glanced around, "where are we?"

"Well, when I filled out the adoption application I thought we could use a bigger place so I looked around on the internet and found this place," she pointed at a house, "so thought I would hear your opinion about it."

Amy's eyes widen, "it's a house" she breathe out.

"Yes it is" Sara said as she kneeled down, "listen Sunbeam, it doesn't have to be this one we can find another one if you prefer that, I just think it could be nice for us to live in a house instead of an apartment."

"Families living in houses" Amy flatly stated.

"Yes some do" Sara agreed, "and others don't but if you like to we can be one of those families who live in a house."

Amy placed her hands on Sara's shoulder and tilted her head, "I think I would like that, do you think we can see the place?"

Sara was about to answer when a male voice was heard, "I think that could be arranged."

Both girls head turned and looked at an elderly man standing in front of them, "hello ladies, I'm Philip and I own the house" he smiled.

"Hello I'm Sara and this is Amy and we are thinking about buying your house" Sara smiled back.

Philip nodded towards the house, "well, come on I'll be glad to show it to you."

They all went inside and was met by Mary Philips wife; they were shown most of the house before they were invited to sit down for coffee and soda.

"I really like the house" Sara said, she looked and Amy "what do you think, Sunbeam?"

"It's so beautiful" Amy said with shinning eyes.

Mary got up and looked at Amy, "I think you missed seeing what I think could be the perfect room for you, want to see it?" She asked.

"Yes please" Amy answered and got up and followed Mary.

"It's a very sweet girl you have" Philip said.

"Yeah, I think so too. Can I ask why you're selling the place?"

"We're both retired now and want to move back to LA to be closer to our children; actually we already have bought a house there, so if you're interested you can take over this place as soon as we have emptied it."

Amy came running back all breathless, "my room has a door directly out into the garden."

Sara chuckled and arched a brow, "your room?"

Amy came over and took Sara's hand, "can we live here? Please, please, please" she begged.

Sara smiled and looked at Philip, "think you can consider your house for sold" she said.

After making the necessary arrangements regarding the buy Sara and Amy went home, after eating lunch they went into Amy's temporary room and unpacked the few things she had brought along and finally they cuddled up on the couch each with their book.

When Sara got up to make dinner Amy had fallen asleep so Sara let her sleep until dinner was ready, after talking some more about the house Sara changed the subject.

"Sweetie, I have to work tonight, so either you have to come along and sleep on the sofa in the lab, or we could try calling Allison and hear if she is up for a sleepover."

"Can I tell her about the house?"

Sara laughed "yes you can."

"Okay, then let's call her."

Sara shook her head and cast a quick glance at Amy, "and you are sure you will be okay being there by yourself?"

Amy tilted her head and thought for a moment, "Yeah, they are my family now so I think it will be okay."

Sara gave her a big smile, "yes they are so do you want to call?"

Amy shrink on the chair, "no, you do it."

Sara called and arranged the sleepover with Ellen, afterwards they cleaned up the kitchen and packed a night bag and went over to Craig's house. The whole family was gathered around the kitchen table playing scrabble. Allison immediately called out for Amy to come help her.

Amy went over to Allison but instead of looking at her letters she just said, "We bought a house today."

Allison mouth felt open and her eyes widen, "are you moving away?"

Sara smiled, "no Allison actually we are moving closer it's only a few blocks away from here."

"What direction?" Craig asked. Sara told him where.

"Oh, that's a nice neighborhood, we looked at a Greek house down there before buying this but it wasn't for sale, unfortunately."

Sara started laughing so much tears was rolling down her cheeks. "No way" Craig growled, "you don't say that's the one you have bought?" Sara who still was laughing just nodded.

"Yeah" Sara finally managed to say, "they are moving back to LA and they have already bought another house so we should be able to get it within a week."

Ellen gazed at her, "time for coffee before you leave?"

"Yes thank you" Sara answered while sitting down. After drinking her coffee and saying goodnight to Amy Sara left for work.

When Sara arrived at the lab she went down to her supervisor's office and knocked on the door.

"Come in" Reeves said.

"Hey Reeves do you have a minute?"

"Sure, for now it seems to be a quieted night, what's up?"

"Due to personal circumstances I need to transfer to day shift."

Reeves narrowed his eyes, "well, I don't mean to pry but is everything okay?"

Sara lit up in a big smile, "yeah I actually think so."

She shortly told him about Amy and her reasons for asking for a transfer and as a father of three children he easily could understand her and see why she needed to switch. He knew one of the guys on day shift had applied for a position on the night shift so he promised to speak with the director Stephanie Douglas and the supervisor of the day shift John Moore and get back to her ASAP.

**Tbc…**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Chapter 8**_

It had required something of a habituation in the beginning a somewhat greater upheaval than Sara had expected just the working hours in the day had been something she suddenly had to adjust to but after a lot of years of only working nights it had been lovely refreshing to see the sun again.

It also meant she had been teamed up with some of her old colleagues from pre-Vegas, Mike Jensen… an old rat in the trade actually Brass had reminded her lot of Mike. Nelly Williams… had over the years ended up as much as a private friend as a colleague they always had fun together and both liked going hiking and she had been the only one Sara had kept in contact with after moving to Vegas. Jennifer Tango yeah well… Willows had been pure joy compared to Jennifer she wasn't and would never be one Sara would think very highly about. Doug Baker… a new guy had only been a CSI for a couple of years but he had turned out to be quite bright and a fast learner. Sara really liked working with him in many ways it had felt like getting a new Greg.

The next days was a mix of buying house, clothes and furniture and talking with Amy's caseworker and packing all the stuff in Sara's apartment, but finally the day arrived where they could move into their new home.

Sara and Amy arrived at the house in the morning and through most of the day moving trucks and delivery trucks came by with their things. Sara had called in for a couple of vacation days so they could get properly into place; it took two days before the house stood tolerable as they wanted it.

Both Amy and Sara's rooms was in place and so was the main living area one of the spare rooms was still filled up with a lot of boxes but they mostly contained books. Sara's room was lying opposite Amy's and had exit directly to the terrace area which was already furnished since the outdoor furniture had been a part of the deal.

In the other end of the house was a room about 24sq yards, after using a couple of days watching the light in there during the day Sara has finally decided what to use the room for, so one day while Amy was playing in the garden Sara started decorating the room.

The bookcases from her flat was already standing along one of the walls she moved her old futon so it stood along the windows for the perfect reading light, a small round table with three chairs was standing in the middle of the room. The other end would require a trip to the mall before she could finish that so instead she began carrying the boxes with books into the room. She unpacked them and placed her books on the top and Amy's on the bottom shelves. After making lunch and sitting the table Sara went out in the garden to see what Amy was doing.

"Hi Sunbeam, what are you doing?"

Amy tilted her head, "thinking."

"Okay" Sara smiled, "about what?"

Amy narrowed her eyes against the sun as she looked up at Sara, "do you think we can buy some flowers to the garden?"

"Yeah, I think we can, if we can find some flowers that can stand being outside this time of year" Sara answered, "let's eat lunch and then we can take a trip to the mall and see what we can find."

They went to the mall. Their first stop was in the garden centre where they managed to find a few different plants that could bear being outside, afterwards they went to the furniture store to look for an office suite for Amy. They found a sweet little desk with drawers and a swivel chair that fit perfectly, next stop was the IT store where they were greeted by a sales man.

"Hello ladies, how can I assist you?"

"Hello, well we do have a big computer at home, but I think we need a smaller and lighter one for… hmm, I don't know…" Sara paused and lightly shook her head from side to side, "for a girl around six-years-old" she smiled.

Amy's mouth felt open as she gazed at Sara, "I'm getting my own computer?"

"Mmm" Sara chuckled, she looked back at the sales man, "it has to be light so she can carry it herself if she wants to bring it to her room or over to a friend's house without hurting her back."

The sales man nodded, "then I think a notebook might is the right thing for her they are small and not very heavy," he looked at Amy, "want to see our selection?"

Amy just nodded; they walked over to the shelves with notebooks the sales man asked how many programs it was suppose to contain so he could pick out the right dimensions, soon eight notebooks in various colors and brand was standing on the floor in front of Amy.

Sara kneeled down and looked at Amy, "any of them you like?"

"They are all fine, but" she smiled to Sara, "the dark pink is really cool."

Sara took the pink notebook and held it in her hands "better give it a try and see how it feels writing on it."

Amy tried it and nodded affirmative, "it's much easier writing on this one than the one we have at home" she said.

Sara gazed questioning at her, "so, this is the one you want?"

Amy nodded, "yes please."

Sara got up and handed the notebook to the sales man, "we'll take this one."

Done shopping they went to the candy store for a big well-deserved ice-cream before going home. The minute they got home Amy began unpacking the notebook but only to be stopped by Sara.

"Sorry Sunbeam, but we need to take care of the plants before it's getting to dark to see anything in the garden and you have to help since you're the one who knows where to put them."

"Okay" Amy put the notebook back on the table, "can we do it now?"

"Sure, you can start carrying the plants to the spots where you want them then I'll find the watering pot and a little shovel so we can dig some holes."

They met up in the backyard and went from spot to spot and planted the plants until all of them were in the soil.

When they got back inside they sat down and began installing programs into Amy's notebook Sara connected it to the wireless router so Amy had access to the internet, they downloaded an msn program and subsequently Sara called Ellen to get Allison's address and soon after the two girls were engrossed in talking with each other through msn.

Sara got up and carried the boxes with Amy's desk and chair into the room she had been working on earlier and began assembling it; afterwards she went back to the kitchen and started cooking dinner.

After eating Sara got up and looked at Amy, "come on sweetie, I have something I want to show you." Amy got up and followed Sara as they walked into the room Sara started talking again. "I thought we could use this room as a combined library/study room it has the perfect light for reading."

"Whao" Amy blew out as she looked around, she walked over to the shelves, "I didn't knew we had this many books," she giggled as she looked over the kid section.

"I think you have been buying some books without telling me I haven't seen this one before," she said holding up a copy of Mark Twain's "The Adventures of Tom Sawyers."

"I might have bought one or two" Sara admitted with a smile, "actually I thought we could use that one as a bedtime story."

Amy nodded as she read on the back, "it sounds exciting."

"It is" Sara promised, "It was one of my favorites when I was a child."

Amy put the book back on the self and went over and sat down on her new chair and twirled it around, "and I have my own desk" she laughed.

Sara went over to her, "yes you do" she said as she kneeled down in front of her, "but I think we need to adjust your chair a bit." Amy stopped spinning and got up while Sara adjusted the chair, "there, think that's the right height for you" Sara smiled.

Amy sat back down, "perfect" she said as she began twirling again.

Sara got up, "you can keep spinning until I'm done with the kitchen and then its shower time."

Amy wrinkled her nose and tilted her head, "can't we make it tub time instead?"

Sara small laughed "you really like the bathtub, huh?"

"Mmm" Amy giggled "especially if it's filled with soap bubbles."

"Okay sweetie bubbles it is."

Sara was sitting on the toilet watching Amy while she was playing in the bathtub; they talked a little about New Year and decided to invite the rest of the family over to celebrate it with them. Sara helped Amy washing her hair and suggested to get it cut a bit which Amy would think about.

Afterwards Sara tugged Amy in and read the first chapter of Tom Sawyers, she turned the bedside lamp on gave her a hug and said goodnight.

Sara was off work New Year's Day and the day after since her Team had worked Christmas so one of the other Teams was covering New Year.

On New Year's Day Amy spend a couple of hours in the afternoon decorating the house while Sara was in the kitchen preparing as much of the dinner as possible, rest of the family arrived late in the afternoon and they barely made it through the front door before Amy was showing them around. After the tour the kids disappeared into Amy's room while the adults sat down at the dinner table and got a cup of coffee.

"It's a very beautiful house, Sara" Laura said.

"Yeah" Craig said, "but I'm not satisfied about what should have been my office now is a library" he laughed.

Sara just shook her head and rolled her eyes at her brother, "yeah mom, we think so too, I really think we are going to like it here."

The kids came running into the room Allison went directly over and took her dads hand, "dad, I really need a door that leads outside in my room just like Amy have" she breathe out.

Craig arched a brow and looked at his daughter, "no you don't until now the front door has worked just fine."

Allison turned towards her mother, "mom!"

"No sweetie" Ellen answered, "you heard your father."

"Told you so" Ian chuckled.

Sara smiled "but if you want the three of you can grab a soda in the fridge."

The kids went to the fridge and then back to Amy's room.

"So, have you thought about what to do with Amy during the day when vacation ends?" Ellen asked.

"I have been meaning to talk to you guys about that, I know she really wants to go to school so I have been thinking about Allison and Ian's school."

"Well, it is a private school but if you can afford buying this house the financial circumstances shouldn't be a problem" Craig said.

"We chose it because it has a great reputation and it also means that they didn't had to changes for middle school or high school when that time comes they can stay there to 12. Grade" Ellen told.

Sara nodded, "so any requirement to enroll a child there?"

"A reference don't hurt, which I will be glad to write, and they will want to see both of you for an interview, and since it's in the middle of the year they probably goner test Amy to see what grade will be the right one for her to start in" Ellen smiled.

"And you're satisfied with their school program?" Sara asked.

"Yes we are" Craig chuckled, "frankly I'm more concerned about whether any school can meet your expectations since she can't start at Harvard yet."

"Sara really, it is a very great school with some very qualified teachers, I don't think you goner regret enrolling Amy there" Ellen insured.

Sara narrowed her eyes and looked at Craig, "fine I'll take your words one that and call them" she smirked sending him a smile.

They talked a bit more before Sara got up and went to the kitchen to finish dinner; Craig brought the children outside in the middle of the evening to watch some fireworks just in case they wouldn't be able to stay awake until midnight.

None of the kids had been awake when they entered the new year and around 2 a.m. they family broke up and went home. Sara cleaned the kitchen but decided the decoration could wait, Amy were still dressed but Sara didn't had the heart to wake her up so she just tugged the duvet around her and let her sleep before going to bed herself.

For once Sara was the first to wake up after dressing she went to kitchen and started the coffeemaker when it was done she poured herself a mug of coffee and went out on the terrace.

A third of the terrace was made almost like a greenhouse three sides was closed with glass and a glass roof but open to the rest of the terrace but it gave the possibility of sitting outside even when the weather wasn't too warm.

Sara was sitting reading the newspaper when the most horrifying scream she had ever heard got her out of the stool and into the house. She found Amy standing in front of her bedroom door shaking her glance something between fear and panic while tears was running down her cheeks. Sara got down on her knees almost sliding the last feet towards Amy and wrapped her arms around the shaking girl.

"Baby, what wrong?" Sara asked her own voice almost in panic.

Amy didn't say anything she just stood rigid her body still shaking.

"Its okay sweetie," Sara whispered softly, "did you have a bad dream?"

"No" Amy said as her body slowly began relaxing, "you were gone" she stuttered.

Sara could have hammered her head into the wall that instant minute. _How stupid can I be?_ Until today every morning had been the same, Amy would wake up first and come into her room and crawl into her bed and wait for her to wake up, so of course it would scare her shitless to find the room empty.

"I'm so sorry baby, I didn't mean to scare you" Sara said comforting.

"I thought you were gone" Amy repeated.

"Yes you did sweetie, and I'm so sorry for that, but you need to know one thing" Sara said leaning back so she could look into Amy's eyes, "no matter what happens I will never ever leave you."

Amy looked at her with imploring eyes "never?"

"No baby never, I might be late or have mom or Ellen to look after you due to my job, but I will always come back home to you, and I will never go anywhere without telling you first, so you can be damn sure if I haven't said anything I'm somewhere here in the house, okay?"

Amy nodded and dried her eyes and gave Sara a little smile, "you said a swearword."

Sara's brows rose, "I did? Oops!"

"Can I use swearwords?" Amy asked.

"No you can't" Sara said taking Amy with her as she got up, "and neither can I" she said before placing a kiss on the girls forehead. "Sweet little girls like you shouldn't even know such words" she smiled.

"I'm not that little" Amy giggled.

Sara, bend down in her knees and dragged herself forward, "no you are actually quite a big girl" she panted.

"No I'm not" Amy laughed.

Sara stopped and narrowed her eyes like she was thinking, "hmm, so you are small enough to be carried and at the same time big enough to use swearwords, is that it?" She chuckled.

"Yep that's it" Amy answered laughing even more.

"Nope Sunbeam, no swearing in this house and that applies for both of us" Sara smiled.

Amy shrugged "okay, it's not like I know that many words anyway."

"Glad to know" Sara said as she put Amy back on the floor.

"But I do know another word" Amy said with a teasing twinkle in her eyes.

"Oh, you do" Sara said playing along, "and what word may that be?"

"Pancakes" Amy shouted with joy.

"Oh, you're clever, Sunbeam" Sara laughed, "well, all right! But only if you help making them."

"Okay, deal" Amy answered walking to the kitchen.

After eating and getting dressed they went into the library Amy opened her notebook and began playing a game while Sara opened her laptop and went through her mailbox.

Sara kept peeking at Amy still unsure about how deep the morning's event had hurt her; Sara could easily imagine what it must've been like standing feeling all alone in the world, and even if she did seem to be fine now it didn't necessarily meant she was.

"Why are you staring at me?" Amy asked without looking up from her game.

Sara blinked a few time so caught up in thoughts she didn't even realized she had gone from peeking to staring, "sorry sweetie didn't mean too, guess I just got caught up in thinking about the morning and how you are feeling about what happened."

Amy stopped her game and for awhile she just sat with her head slightly tilted and thought about that but she finally looked at Sara. "At first I was scared until I saw that you weren't gone, and when you told me you never leave me I remembered you once told me that you would never lie to me so it made me feel better."

Sara leaned forward and rested her hands on Amy's thighs and looked into her eyes, "and that's a promise I intent to keep I will never lie to you" she said.

"Okay" Amy nodded "then I feel fine now."

"Good" Sara said ruffling Amy's hair, "want to feel even better?" She asked wiggling her brows.

"Mmm" she said, smiling broadly.

"What's your biggest wish?"

Amy looked confused "um, living with you."

"Thank you very much" Sara smiled, "but you are already doing that, so it's not that."

Amy shook her head, "then I don't know."

"Hmm" Sara chuckled, "guess we'll have to wait until you figure it out so we can be sure about it is something you really wish for."

"Or you could tell me" Amy encouraged.

"That I could but I won't you are a very smart girl so you will figure it out on your own."

Amy got up and gazed at Sara, "I will go for a walk now, I think so much better when I'm walking."

Sara bit down on her lip to prevent a laugh, "okay Sunbeam, I'll be here when you come back."

A little while later a loud scream was heard for the second time that day but this time it was filled with joy instead of fear. Amy came running through the door and jumped into Sara's lap.

"Am I going to school?" She breathless blew out.

"Like I said a very smart girl" Sara smiled, "yes you are."

"When, when, when…"

"Wow baby, don't forget to breath" Sara grinned, "we have to enroll you first so I'll call the school tomorrow and try to get an appointment as soon as possible. I talked to Craig and Ellen and they suggested Ian and Allison's school they say it's a great school."

"And I will also know someone in advance" Amy added.

"Yes you will" Sara granted her, "but it leave us with another problem until you can begin" she continued, "I'm going back to work tomorrow and you are too young to stay home alone, so how will you feel about spending the day with Laura?"

"She's nice so I think it will be okay but isn't she working?"

"Yes she is but she says it won't be a problem bringing you along to the hostel and you can take your notebook and some books with you."

"Okay, do you think I can go by the Rainbow and visit Sean when he comes home from school?"

"If Laura says you can then it's okay with me," Sara allowed, "so up for a board game?"

"Sure" Amy crawled down and found a game.

Sara dropped Amy off at the hostel on her way to work; she had already filled out the school application through the internet. Ellen had text her that she had delivered an recommendation then she brought the kids to school, so after saying good morning Sara called the school to get an appointment which she got the following day.

Amy also spend the next day with Laura onto Sara came by after work and picked her up before heading towards the school for their interview, they were greeted by the schools superintendent Brenda O´Sullivan.

"So you want to go to school?" Brenda smiled looking at Amy.

"Yes very much" Amy nodded keen.

"Well, always a good thing when it's that way around," Brenda handed some papers to Amy, "I will like if you will fill out this little test for me so we can figure out what grade you belong in, so why don't you go sit over by that table while I'm talking to your mother and then we can look it over when you're done."

Amy jumped in her seat when she heard Brenda use the word mother, she looked nervously at Sara but she just winked at her, so she nodded and went over to the table and began filling out the test.

Brenda told Sara about the school prospectus and Sara asked a few questions and told it was her brother who had recommended the school. About seven minutes after leaving her chair Amy returned and handed the papers back to Brenda.

"That was fast" Brenda smiled "sure about you don't want to use a little more time on it?"

Amy shrugged, "no."

"Well" Brenda said as her eyes glanced over the papers, "seems like you have answered correctly every time," she raised her brows and chuckled, "you even figured out that one of them doesn't have a solution." She smiled and looked at Amy, "something tells me that you are quite a bright child and I'm happy to welcome you to our school." Brenda looked at Sara, "I think she will be more than capable to start in first or maybe even in second grade."

"Academic… probably, but I will prefer if she starts in kindergarten, until now she has only been homeschooled which means there are still things about being in school she hasn't learned yet, so I think it will be for the best if she finish this year in kindergarten and then subsequently take an evaluation of which grade she belongs in."

"That of course is your choice as the parent, so if you think that's what's best for your child then that's what we'll do, and it's not like we can't give her some more difficult books if she gets bored."

Sara nodded "so when can she start?"

"If you fill out the forms on your way out, she can begin tomorrow." Brenda looked at Amy, "would you like to see the school before you leave?"

"Yes please."

They all got up and took a tour around the school, afterwards Sara filled out the forms and soon after they were on their way home, after driving for awhile Sara began wondering about why Amy wasn't saying anything.

"Are you alright, Sunbeam?"

Amy just shrugged but didn't say anything she just kept looking at her hands.

Sara was really getting nervous about Amy's behavior so she pulled over and parked the car, she got out and went to the backdoor and opened it and unbuckled Amy.

"Baby what's wrong? If you don't what to go to school after all then please tell me."

"It's not that I want to go to school, it was something Brenda said" Amy briefly paused, "am… am I your child?"

Sara swallowed hard and tried to push the knot in her throat back to her stomach, "that's entirely up to you Amy whether you want that or not, but personally I will be very proud and honored to call you my daughter, but only if you are comfortable with that."

Amy thought about that for awhile, "Does that mean I can call you mom?"

As much as she tried Sara couldn't prevent her voice from trembling a bit, "if you want to you are most welcome to do so, but if you prefer to keep calling me Sara that will be just as fine. Sweetie, I don't expect or want you to say or do anything until you feel ready or want to do so."

Amy gave her a hug and nodded, "okay."

"So, ready to go home?"

"Mmm" she nodded, flashing her a big grin.

Sara barely had the car running again before Amy started laughing on the backseat, "what?"

"You know it's not completely true what you said."

Sara arched a brow, "it's not?"

"Nope" Amy giggled "I can't choose whether I want to brush my teeth or not."

Sara started laughing, "No you're right that one is not open for debate, until the day you move away from home you'll brush your teeth two times a day."

"Thought so" Amy narrowed her eyes, "but why would I want to move away from home?"

Sara looked at her through the rear-view mirror, "well, I don't hope it's going to be anytime soon, but you might one day want to go to college or you'll get married and want to live in your own house."

Amy tilted her head, "yeah maybe! Why ain't you married?"

"Hmm, that's a good question" Sara said "maybe it's because I haven't met the right one yet, come to think about it, I don't think I ever have thought about getting married."

"Well, neither have I if that's any consolation" Amy small laughed.

"Oh, that's a big consolation" Sara chortled "especially since I think you're a bit young to even consider having a boyfriend."

Amy rolled her eyes at that, "yuk! I don't like boys. Um, well I like Sean but I think that's okay ´cause he's my friend."

"Yes it is" Sara smiled "I think it's a good thing both to have girls and boys as friends."

They arrived home. Amy helped making dinner, got her backpack packed, got her evening bath and two chapters of her night story and yet the expectation of going to school the next day didn't make sleep come easy for the girl but she finally dozed off.

**Tbc…**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Chapter 9**_

Just as Sara had expected it was a lively and a bit anxious girl that woke up the next morning. Amy was hardly able to eat her cereals or stand still while they brushed her teeth but finally they went on their way and soon after they arrived at school.

They were guided to the classroom and greeted by the kindergarten teacher Rachel Olson; she introduced Amy to the class and her new classmates all told her, their name before Rachel told her to take a seat. Sara stayed half an hour just to be sure that Amy was fine before she left for work.

It was a fagged out but happy girl Sara picked up after work, Amy used the entire drive home to tell about her day and they barely made it inside before Sara was shown all the new books she had received and her timetable.

After figuring out which books were required the next day and putting them into her bag Amy brought the rest of the books into the study room while Sara started making dinner. Amy kept telling through dinner and her bath but they never made it through a whole chapter of her bedtime story before she slept.

The Sidle house quickly felt into a daily routine of school and work and whenever Sara had to work the weekends Amy was either at Laura or Craig's home. Sara had hired a young girl that lived further down the street to babysit Amy the two nights she went to the Rainbow Home to teach. It simply would be too late for Amy to get to bed on a school night if she brought her along.

Amy had been quite unhappy about not being allowed to come along but Sara hadn't given in even if it had hurt seeing Amy upset.

It had made Sara quite nervous the first couple of times Amy's caseworker had been there not so much due to their daily life but more the fact that she from time to time had to leave Amy at relatives, but she had assured Sara that all she looked for was Amy's welfare and how she was developing and so far everything had looked fine.

Another thing Sara had wondered about was the fact that after five and half month in school Amy still hadn't mentioned any school friends. Sara knew that Amy was hanging out with Allison in the recess but except from her she hadn't heard Amy mention anyone else.

Sara had tried to talk to Amy about it and told her she was more than welcome to bring friends home or visit them if she wanted to. Amy had just shrugged and said that she did talk to her classmates but that she found them to childish for her to want to hang out with them after school, which had left Sara stunned.

Not least realizing that even if she herself had been a child that had hidden out behind books most of her upbringing that wasn't something she wanted for Amy, but Sara was also well aware of that she couldn't force her child into spending time with people she didn't really cared for, so she had decided to give it some more time and then see if Amy wouldn't make some friends eventually.

As they had gotten closer towards summer vacation Sara had begun wondering what to do with Amy since she only had two weeks' vacation, she had talked to Ellen and Craig since she expected that they would have the same problem.

Ellen had told her that they used to send the kids to summer camp but the kids hadn't been particularly happy about the one they had went to the year before so she was going to check out another one and had invited Sara to come along.

It had seemed like a great place with the possibility of participating in all sorts of things, they offered almost all kind of sports games, you could get lessons in horse riding, or dance all from ballet to break-dance, or you could take lessons in playing a music instrument, and there was different clubs you could be a member of like chess or a book club.

There was a large playground which ran directly up to the forest which gave the opportunity from just taking a swing to building a lair in the woods, after seeing the entire place both women had signed up their kids.

In the middle of June the letter Sara had both feared and looked forward to arrived, she expected that the adoption had been approved but she also knew it could be an extension of the probation time or worst a refusal that she only had been approved as a foster care parent.

It hadn't been before Amy had asked why she didn't open the letter she finally had gotten around to do so. A big sigh of relief had left her as she went through the pages telling her that she had been approved.

They had talked a bit about it, Sara had carefully tried to explain to Amy what the consequence was if she signed them. Amy's answer to the conversation had been to pick out a pen from her pencil case and handing it to Sara who had signed them supervised by Amy.

A week before school was out Sara told Amy about summer camp, Amy had been very hesitating in the beginning but hearing that it was only I the day hours and what possibilities the camp offered and not least the fact that Ian and Allison would be there had finally convinced Amy to give it a try.

Sara was the one of them that was most nervous when she drove Amy to camp the first day, they had met up with Ellen, Allison and Ian on the parking lot so the three of them could go together.

"Do you guys want us to come inside with you?" Ellen asked.

Ian rolled his eyes, "mom, we're not babies." He looked at the girls, "ready to go?"

Both of them nodded and started walking and soon all three disappeared into the main building. Sara sighed loudly; Ellen gazed at her and smiled knowing exactly how she was feeling.

"I'll see you later when we come back to pick them up" Ellen said.

"Yep" Sara smiled before heading back to her car.

Sara was keen to hear how Amy's day had been, she really hoped she had met a few children she might consider being friends with, so it had been a big relief watching her daughter walking towards her accompany by two kids around her own ages.

"Hi sweetie" Sara greeted her.

After only hesitating a split second Amy smiled and said, "Hi mom, this is my new friends Adam and Jill."

Sara blinked a few times not sure if she had heard right, actually it hadn't been before she heard Adam saying "hello Amy's mom" she was sure that Amy indeed had called her mom. She lit up in the biggest smile and looked at Adam, "hello Adam I'm Sara and hello to you too Jill."

"Hi" Jill said while struggling with her glasses to stay in place.

A woman approached them, "hi Jill" she said before turning towards Sara, "Hello I'm Dina Jill's mother."

"Hello I'm Sara and that's my daughter Amy."

Dina faced her daughter, "sorry sweetheart but you have to say bye now ´cause we're in a bit of a hurry," she gazed at Sara, "nice to meet you hope to see you again one day when I'm not in such a hurry."

"I'll be here every day so hopefully we will" Sara smiled.

After they left Sara turned to Adam, "so, how will you be getting home?"

"I'll take the camp bus my mom doesn't drive and my dad is off work too late to come pick me up."

"Mom, can't we drive him?"

"No we can't, Sunbeam, I'm sure Adam has been taught not to get into some strangers car, and we don't want to get him in trouble."

Amy tilted her head, "but I'm not a stranger anymore."

"No you're not" Sara raised an amused eyebrow at Amy, "but for your information I can say that I am and I'm also the one driving."

Sara smiled, ignoring Amy's frown, "Listen sweetie, we can't drive him without his parents' permission, but we can give Adam our phone number so they can call us after Adam has spoken with them, and if they say it's all right then he can drive with us from tomorrow."

"Okay" Amy sighed, "Do you want my number, Adam?"

"Sure, then I'll talk to mom when I get home."

Amy wrote it down and said goodbye before following Sara to the car, the whole drive home Sara listened to Jill this and Adam that and it had removed a big knot in her stomach not only hearing that Amy liked camp but as much that it seemed like Amy finally had found herself some friends.

After eating Amy had vanish into her room and returned a few minutes later with some papers about which things the children wanted to take part in, they sat down and started looking them over.

"So, anything you know for sure you want to try out?" Sara asked looking at Amy.

"Yeah, I like to take dance lessons."

"Okay, which one of them do you have in mind, Ballet?"

"Nay" Amy giggled "I think I'm more the pip-hop/break dance type."

Laughing Sara ticked off hip-hop, "what else?"

"I know Jill is taking horse riding and suggested I did the same but I only want to sign up for one week until I know if I even like horses."

Sara nodded "sounds like a good idea" she said ticking riding off. "Anything else you want to try?"

"Yeah, I would like taking music lessons but um, I think that cost money because you'll have to buy your own music pamphlet."

"So I'll give you money to buy pamphlet" Sara smiled at her, ruffling her hair softly, "actually, I think it's about time we talk about a weekly allowance for you."

"You don't have to give me money it's not like I need anything."

"No I don't but I want to, you're a good girl that always helps out without even being asked, you do your homework and you keep your room, so I think it's only fair you get an allowance."

Amy smiled "okay, can I get a piggy bank?"

"Sure you can, I'll ask Craig for one of those they have in his bank. Now, other classes you want to participate in?"

"Hmm, the book club perhaps but we don't have to decide that until next week."

Sara folded the paper and handed it to Amy, "better put it back in your bag," she looked the girl over and smiled, "and then I think it's bathing time."

Amy got her bath Sara read her another chapter in her bedtime book and tugged her in, just as Sara was about to get up from the bed Amy pushed the duvet aside and crawled onto Sara's lap and rested on her own lower legs and fiddled with the string in Sara blouse without saying anything. Sara just wrapped her arms around her and gently let her hand stroke up and down Amy's back without saying anything either, she just waited until Amy was ready to say what was on her mind.

Amy finally looked into Sara's eyes, "do you think it makes my first mom sad that I call you mom?" She asked innocently.

Sara blinked a few times and swallowed hard not exactly the question she had expected, "it's a tough question to give a truthful answer to sweetie, but I think there's two questions in that question, I think the first part of the question is how it makes you feel?"

"I like it, but I don't want to make her sad" Amy replied uncertainly.

"Sweetie, I know your first mom loved you very much and I'm sure that all she wants for you is that you are as happy as possible, so as long she can see you're happy I think she'll be fine with it, I know I would" Sara said softly, making sure to keep eye contact with her.

"You would?"

"Yes baby, if I for some reasons couldn't be here to take care of you then all I could wish for was that someone else would be here to make you happy and nothing you say or do could ever make me feel sad as long as I could see that it made you happy."

Amy rested her head on Sara's shoulder and stayed silent for so long that Sara began wondering if she had fallen asleep until she spoke up, "maybe she was the one how found you because she knew you would make me happy."

"Honestly… I don't know sweetie, but I know you make me very happy so if she did I am her very grateful."

"Me too, mom" Amy yawned against Sara's neck.

"Think someone needs to go to sleep now" Sara said hugging her.

"Mmm" Amy mumbled almost sleeping before Sara had covered her with her duvet.

"Sleep well" Sara whispered before leaving the room as she reached the living room the phone started ringing she went over and answered it.

"Hello, Sara Sidle speaking."

"Hello, this is Jasmine Jefferson; I'm Adams mother he told he had been offered to get a lift home from camp."

"That's correct" Sara confirmed, "my daughter Amy suggested he could get a lift which is fine with me, so if you don't mind he's welcome to ride with us instead of taking the bus."

Jasmine chuckled "oh yeah, we have heard quite a bit about Amy today they really seem to get along just fine."

"Oh you too" Sara laughed, "here it has been Adam this and Jill that since I picked her up, but I'm glad she has found some friends it makes it easier driving her to camp knowing she won't be by herself all day."

"Yeah tell me about it, I was frankly quite surprised when I learned that none of Adams classmates was going to camp or at least not this one. But regarding the lift that will be okay, did he mention where we live?"

"No, we didn't get that much into it."

"Okay, do you know the area people referring to as the seabird neighborhood because all the streets are named after a seabird?"

"Yeah I have heard of it" Sara chuckled.

"Well, we live on 1136 White-tailed Eagle Road; it should be the fourth approach road from the direction you're coming from."

"Well, that would be the street after mine" Sara laughed "we live in 1122."

"Wow, talk about a small world" Jasmine laughed, "we sometimes walk by there to look at the Greek house, always remind us of the trip we too years back to Greece."

"Seems like you already knows where we live so feel free to come inside the next time you come by" Sara smiled into the receiver.

"Oh, so you're the one who bought it, I did hear it was out for sale. Well then welcome to the neighborhood and we might just do that" Jasmine said. "Better get the last kid to bed, see you tomorrow, goodnight."

"Yes you will, goodnight" Sara replied before hanging up.

The next weeks quickly went by, they had been by Adams place for a barbecue, Amy had had her new friends over for a sleepover, Jill's parents owned several horses so they had spend a Saturday at their place so the kids could go horse riding.

One evening about two weeks before Sara was to start her vacation Amy gazed at her, "mom, are we going somewhere on vacation?"

Sara raised her brows not really something she had thought about it wasn't like she had any habit of going anywhere, "think it depends on whether you like to go anywhere or not, sweetie."

"I don't know" Amy shrugged "guess it could be fun to go see something I just don't know what I would like to see."

"Sara got up "come on, I got an idea."

They went into the library, a month earlier Sara had worked a case in an antique shop and stumbled over an old floor standing globe on wooden stand but instead of the entire world it only covered the states and a lot of the cities in them. Tiny holes were drilled in the surface so whenever a state was placed over the embedded light, and if the room was dark, you could see the states starry sky in the ceiling. While whirling the globe around Sara began telling a bit about the different states and what supposedly could be seen there, after half an hour Amy had narrowed it down to three states.

"What about New York? I would like to see the Statue of Liberty."

"I think New York will be a great place to go on vacation one day, but if you're to get full enjoyment out of it I think it will be better to wait until you're a bit older. What about California?"

"Well, Jill went to Disneyland last year and she says it was a lot of fun but there were a lot of things she couldn't try because she either wasn't tall or old enough and we are about the same height so maybe that should wait as well. Then there's SeaWorld in Florida" Amy continued "but… well, I like to see a killer whale but I don't like the idea about keeping a wild animal captivated in a small tank."

Sara gave her a big smile, "I know exactly what you mean I'm not thrilled about that idea either."

She got up and went over to her computer and turned it on, Amy came over to see what she was doing.

"I know it's not killer whales" Sara said looking at Amy, "but if it still exists I might know a place where you can see and swim with dolphins and even though they are trained they are still allowed to live free in the ocean. Here it is" Sara said as she pulled Amy onto her lap so she could watch the screen.

Amy's eyes widen as she turned and gazed at Sara, "we can go to Hawaii and see dolphins?"

"Yes we can" Sara chuckled, "but I'm not sure they have any entertainment parks for kids, but you can see big waterfalls and both active and extinct volcanoes and you can take a trip with boats where the bottom has been replaced with glass so you can see the wildlife under the surface."

Amy's mouth felt open while Sara was talking, "for real? You can see all that?"

Sara smiled and wiggled her brows, "yes for real baby, and if the weather is good I might teach you how to surf too."

"Mom, I sooo want to go to Hawaii" Amy said unable to sit still.

"Better fill out the reservation then" Sara laughed as she began filling out the forms on the net afterwards she booked plane tickets while Amy was dancing around on the floor.

Departure day finally arrived and from the minute they reached the airport and until they went to bed in their bungalow Amy's camera had barely been closed.

They went on several guided tours and twice they went swimming with dolphins, they never got around surfing since Sara found it more important to teach her daughter how to swim. The last day before going home they rented a car and took a trip on their own, and the next day they went back home.

Sara had been by Amy's school before it started to talk with Brenda O´Sullivan about what grade Amy should be in. Brenda and the school officials had suggested she skip first and second grade and move right on to third but Sara wouldn't hear of it.

She felt that the social stimulation of her peers was too important for Amy's development to skip it. If it should turn out that Amy academically got bored she could always get some more difficult material or Sara could side teach her at home, but for now she ranked friendships higher than books.

Sara on some level found it a bit ironical since she always had placed books on top of everything in her own life.

They had agreed to let her start in second grade which Amy had been very happy about since that meant she would be in the same class as Adam.

Equally, Sara had spent time finding a place where Amy could continue her music lessons, it emerged that she both liked and was quite talented playing the saxophone and wanted to keep on taking lessons, Sara had finally managed to find a place not too far away from Amy's school.

Organization. It was the key to keeping sane when juggling a career in criminalities and motherhood. The Monday Amy returned to school, Sara's boss was rushed to the hospital with appendicitis, leaving her in charge for the remainder of the week. She worked straight through lunch and managed to pick up her daughter by four o'clock.

Sara congratulated Amy on her first day of school, heard all about the new teacher, and signed the requisite forms as the girl continued to talk about her classmates. The emergency contact form gave her some pause. 'Name of Father' was left blank, but the rest she filled out.

Slowly and with a mixture of work and school everyday life returned to the Sidle house, and to Sara's joy several of Amy's friends pretty often in their home.

**Tbc…**


	10. Chapter 10

_**Chapter 10**_

**The present:**

Sara got called back from her thoughts when her phone started ringing she picked it from her pocked and looked at the caller's name, a smile appeared on her lips as she flipped it open.

"This is Crime Scene Investigator Sidle speaking."

A giggle was heard in the other end of the line, "hi mom."

"Hi Sunbeam, what is my little darling still doing up?"

"Mom, its Friday so I can stay up late."

"Yes you can sweetie" she said with a slight headshake, "are you and Allison having fun?"

"Yep, we have been watching Aladdin and eating ice-cream and I have helped Allison with some math so uncle Craig has promised we can go down to the sea promenade and watch the carnival tomorrow."

"Sounds like fun sweetie, did you do your own homework as well?"

"Nope, don't have any Adam and I used our lunch break to do that so we didn't have to use our weekend on homework."

"Clever girl" Sara chuckled into the receiver.

"Mmm, when are you coming home?"

"I'm not sure baby, I hope tomorrow but I'm afraid it won't be before Sunday I have quite a few things I need to look at before I can go home."

"Okay mom. Er, I better hang up and go help Allison building the den we're goner sleep in tonight, just wanted to say goodnight."

"Goodnight Sunbeam, sweet dreams and I'll take to you tomorrow and say hey to the rest of the family."

"I will. Talk to you tomorrow, bye mom," Amy said into the receiver before hanging up.

A light shiver ran through Sara, she got up it was getting to cold to sit outside so she went inside and found some sleeping clothes and went to the bathroom for a hot shower. Done she went back to the room and sat down on the bed and went through the file Mr. Cox had given her. She woke up in the middle of the night when the phone beside the bed started ringing.

"Sidle" she mumbled still half in sleep.

"Miss Sidle, Gregory Cox here, sorry to wake you up in the middle of the night but there has been another assault and we suspect it's the same guy so I thought that perhaps you would like to come along."

Sara sat up, "sure, where do we go?"

"Well, you two are closest to the hospital where they are bringing the woman, so it would be a big help if you guys starts there before the nurses ruins the evidence."

"We'll do that" Sara said, "I'll call you back then we're done there." She got the address on the hospital. "Better go wake Doug up, talk to you later."

Sara called Doug and twenty minutes later they were on their way, they arrived at the hospital and went inside and found the woman. She had totally refused to speak with the policeman present so after examining the woman Sara had also taken her statement.

After collecting all the evidence Sara had called Mr. Cox as promised, he had asked if they wanted to help with the woman's apartment as well, apparently it looked like a warzone so he could use some extra hands.

They left the hospital and drove to the address, a few patrol cars was parked there, Sara pulled over and killed the engine, they both got out and went to rear end to get their kits and to put overalls on. As Sara was button the last button her face lit up in a big smile as an old familiar voice reached her ears.

"I sure as hell hope the help they are sending from Frisco has more than the two years experience our guys have, and if they knows how to use the equipment in a lab that could be nice to" the detective said.

Sara stopped a few feet's behind the detective, "Oh Detective, I don't think you have to worry about my ability to work in a lab or how to use the equipment, and as for my experience I can promise you that I can write down a lot more than two years on my résumé" she chuckled.

The detective momentarily forgot to breath and a light shiver ran down her spine when Sara's husky voice reached her ears, she couldn't prevent the smile on her lips as she turned around and came face to face with no one else than "Sara Sidle" she breath out.

"Hello Sofia" Sara said with a big smile.

"Hello Sara" Sofia said surprised, "what are you doing here?"

Sara couldn't help chuckling over Sofia's surprised face, "looking for Mr. Cox maybe you can point me in the right direction?"

Sofia had finally gotten hold on herself, "sure, bottom apartment on your right" she answered.

"Thanks, oh and this is my colleague Doug Baker" Sara said as she began walking towards the apartment, as she passed Sofia she handed her a piece of paper, "the victims statement."

Doug nodded as he past the detective. Crossing the yellow police tape, they headed up the stairwell. Police officers were taking statements from shocked neighbors.

Sara walked into the crime scene, scanning their surroundings quickly, her mind automatically categorizing the information. It was a small home, in a modest neighborhood, tastefully decorated and thoroughly trashed.

They found Gregory and for the next three hours four people were walking around the flat collecting evidence.

Fortunately it had never been a problem for Sara to do her job properly while thinking about anything else otherwise she would have been in deep shit because all she could think about was Sofia and all the questions it had caused seeing her again.

Sofia's luck was that she was just as professional as Sara, because her head was just as filled with questions as Sara's, but she knew they would have to wait, for now, she needed to concentrate on her work.

It was almost 7 a.m. before they got back to the lab, after unloading the evidence Gregory suggested that they went out for breakfast. To everyone except Sara it sounded like a good idea so the three of them went out while Sara stayed back and began looking at some of the samples.

At some point while looked at a piece of fabric through the microscope she got the feeling that she wasn't alone in the room, after a few seconds more she knew exactly who was in the room with her, she had only met one person in her life that just by looking at her could make her feel like she was the one under the microscope.

"Sofia, I know you want answers ASAP but I can't do magic so you'll have to be a bit more patient."

"I don't expect you to, Sara; I just had this sneaking suspicion that you still haven't learned to take a break while working a case" Sofia smirked, "so I'm not here for answers but to take you out to breakfast."

Sara slowly lifted her head up from the microscope and turned it to face Sofia; "hmm" she said narrowing her eyes, "guess that means you're paying and I bet you know where to get the best coffee in town," she stretched up, raising an amused eyebrow, "okay let's have breakfast."

Sofia was totally taken aback actually she had expected Sara to blankly refuse it or at least that she would come up with some kind of protesting, so seeing Sara walking towards her was a very pleasant surprise.

"Still smooth" Sofia chuckled as they walked out the door, and towards the parking lot.

Sofia drove them to a nearby diner where both ordered coffee and something to eat. They talked a bit about the case, Sofia filled out some of the blanks Sara had, and she told what she so far thought should be looked a bit further at. But the subject was ultimately doomed to change since both of them had so many questions that not concerned the case.

Sofia tilted her head and smiled, "so you're back in Frisco!" It wasn't really a question more a statement.

Sara returned the smile, "yes I am, been living there for some time now."

Sofia lightly shook her head and chuckled, "well guess life is full of surprises I would never have guessed that Grissom could be persuaded to leave Vegas." She shrugged "but seems all it took was the right woman."

"I don't know about that" Sara replied, "to the best of my knowledge he's still in Vegas."

"Oh… shit I'm sorry Sara, I just assumed that the two of you were still together," Sofia briefly closed her eyes feeling quite embarrassed, "um… it's just I don't think I ever have seen you look as happy as you do now."

Sara waited until Sofia opened her eyes again, "it's okay Sofia" she assured, "it was my decision to leave Vegas and all the things that it involved," she gave Sofia a little smile, "and you're right in almost every aspects of my life I really am happy. Truth be told, I have never regretted leaving Vegas." She bit down on her lower lip, "why did you leave Vegas?"

Sofia sighed and leaned back against the backrest in the booth, "several reasons I guess. I didn't really like the direction things were developing in, first Nick got kidnapped then Brass got shot and when you got kidnapped… and despite we did found you in time" she shrugged "I just knew I couldn't stay any longer that it only would be a matter of time before we ran out of luck and something would amiss…"

She paused for a moment, "I don't know, Sara, think I just finally reached my limit and needed to leave and start over some place new."

It wasn't the only reason for her disappearance but she didn't want to get into the other one so she just kept it with that.

Sara nodded she knew there was more to the story than Sofia was letting out but she valued her own privacy too much to think of intruding on someone else's.

"Yeah, and unfortunately it turned out that you were right in your assumption." Sara leaned back as well, "but that wasn't really what I meant with the question, guess I just always wondered why you left without saying goodbye."

Sara looked down on her hands resting on the table, "I know we wasn't exactly best friends and yeah, I know that I'm mostly to blame for that I never made anything easy for you, but…" she said, her voice tinged with profound sorrow.

"After you became a detective, I don't know I just felt like things slowly were getting better between us so guess it just really sucked realizing that you had left without saying a word and without the opportunity to even thank you for help finding me."

Sofia just sat stunned for awhile wondering who the hell the woman sitting opposite of her was she was so far away from the Sara Sidle she used to know years back. Not in her wildest imagination would she ever have imagined hearing Sara willingly tell about how things had made her feel or apologizing for things she had done.

"I'm sorry, Sara, I just never expected that my departure would make any difference to you and since you were still in the hospital when I left, and with those circumstances in mind there just never seemed to be a proper moment to say goodbye." Sofia chuckled "but if you still want to say thanks then I guess dinner tonight could be a fine place to start."

Sara slowly let her eyes roam up Sofia's upper body until she reached a pair of twinkling eyes she tilted her head and narrowed an eye.

"Now who was it that called other people smooth?" She laughed, "Well, guess that's the least I can do, and I even goner let you decide where we are going."

"Whao" Sofia laughed, "You just keep on surprising me today, Miss Sidle."

Sara stopped laughing and arched a brow, "Miss?" She asked. Sofia stopped laughing and gazed at Sara in disbelieve. For Sara, Sofia's face expression was priceless she brook down in laugher "I try" she stuttered.

"Bitch" Sofia growled laughing. "Well, CSI Sidle, better get you back to work before you have any more fun on my behalf."

They got up and went back to the lab Sofia wrote down her number and asked Sara to text her as soon as she found anything usefully. Sara promised and went inside Sofia went back to the precinct to look further into the statement Sara had given her earlier.

In the meantime Gregory, Amanda and Doug had returned to the lab and finished unloading the equipment from the car, all three stood bent over the lighted assembly table and looked at a pile of pictures from the crime scene, Sara went over to them and looked at Gregory.

"So what do you want us to look at?"

"Is any of you capable of making a DNA profile?"

"Sure" Sara smiled, "Doug is a lab tech there isn't much in here he can't do."

Gregory looked at Doug, "I have heaps of blood samples from this and previously victims that needs to be processed so we can eliminate all the victims DNA."

Doug nodded, "as soon as I'm done connecting the machines I'll start working on them."

"Guess you're just as experienced as I am" Gregory said to Sara, "so I would like to hear how you want to approach this case, maybe you have another angle to view the evidence than me, ´cause quite frankly I think this case could use a fresh pair of eyes."

"I don't know about that but I think there is a few things we need to take a closer look at, for example the fabric I was looking at earlier I just never got to finish it before I was interrupted" Sara chortled.

"I still can't put my finger on it but something about this case just don't make any sense, we know from the women's statements that he use himself and not an object to rape them and that he at some point during the rape are lying on top of them, and to the best of my knowledge that practically makes it impossible not to leave anything of yourself behind" she said, giving them a pointed look.

"And from watching the pictures there are nothing that indicates that he sticks around to clean up afterwards so we should be able to find some kind of trace after him."

Gregory considered that, and gave a non-committal nod.

"So I suggest we go through the evidence from tonight first and then precede with the old cases, hopefully the fact that Doug and I haven't seen them before can give us a new angle and idea to examine some things that still haven't been looked at."

Gregory agreed so they distributed the evidence between them and began working, when they reached the middle of the afternoon everyone was so tired they decided to stop and get some sleep.

Sara and Doug went back to the motel when they reached their doors Doug stopped and turned towards Sara.

"Er, do you mind if I don't join you for dinner tonight?"

Sara chuckled, "that tired, huh?"

Doug blushed, "um no, it's more that Amanda suggested that we could have dinner together."

"My, my Doug, someone is working fast" Sara said with mirth, "but that's fine, I'm suppose to go meet with the detective on the case to bring her up to speed with what we have figured out so far, so think I survive without your company."

"Okay" Doug snickered "guess I'll see you tomorrow then."

"That you will" Sara answered she unlocked the door and went inside and through herself on the bed.

She send a short messaged to Sofia and one to Amy telling her that she wouldn't be able to make it home before Sunday, and finally she crawled under the duvet to catch a few hours of sleep. Around 7 p.m. she got up again and took a shower and an hour later she left her room and went out to the parking lot to meet up with Sofia.

"Hey" Sofia smiled when Sara got into the car, "did you get some sleep?"

"Hey, yeah a bit" Sara answered as she buckled her seatbelt, "what about you?"

"Yeah, I managed to go home for several hours, so should be able to stay awake through dinner" she quipped.

"Feel free to say you find my company boring, guess we better skip dessert so you can get back to bed ASAP" Sara chortled mischievously.

"Cheapskate" Sofia retorted chuckling. She pulled over and parked in front of a little café, "don't you think you can cheat me from dessert I might even go for first course as well if you keep that up."

Sara raised a brow and let her eyes roam over Sofia, "empty threat my dear, no way that little stomach can contain that amount of food" she gestured towards Sofia's stomach.

"I might surprise you" Sofia grinned as they got out of the car. They went inside and was led to a table, seated the waiter handed them the menus and left. Sofia opened it and looked over the drinks, "wine?" She asked.

Sara wrinkled up her nose and lightly shook her head, "no thanks, I'll settle for some ice tea" she smiled "but feel free to order a bottle if you want to."

"No, ice tea actually sounds fine" Sofia replied.

She waved the waiter over and ordered ice tea, a grilled steak with mashed potatoes and salad, Sara ordered a baked potato, salad topped with grilled vegetables and baguette, he wrote it all down and left the table again.

Sofia gazed at Sara and smiled, "so what have you been doing since we last met?"

"A little lab work and some sleep" Sara smirked devilishly.

Sofia rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out, "you are quite the comedian today! You know perfectly what I mean."

Sara turned earnest, "I left Vegas about two months after you and went back to Frisco" she shrugged "guess just like you I reached my limit, no matter how much I tried I just couldn't shake the whole kidnapping experience off."

She paused for a long moment, "if possible things got even worse to the point where I wasn't even capable of feeling any compassion for the victims I got in contact with" she wryly admitted. "So eventually I realized that I wasn't really left with other choices than to leave Vegas to prevent a total break down."

Sofia just listened without interrupting she was still trying to adjust to this new open side of Sara.

"After coming back to Frisco" Sara continued, "I began teaching in science at Berkeley and still not feeling ready to work in any kind of law enforcement I went to Costa Rica as a photographer on a study project."

She told a bit about her trip, "but I did miss the work; it holds a challenge and provide a level of satisfaction I doubt I can find in another job, so I finally started working for the SF CSI Team again" she finished.

"Whoa, Costa Rica that most have been exciting" Sofia smiled, "and quite a cleansing trip ´cause you really do look great."

She looks incredible, Sofia thought, her hair falling in soft curls, and the candlelight highlighting the delicate features of her face. Sofia had no doubt about Sara wasn't telling the whole story but she was wise enough not to ask sure about Sara easily could shut down if she felt cornered, and that was the last thing she wanted to happen.

"Thanks, and yeah at least for me it was" Sara replied, "what about you? What have you been doing since you left Vegas?"

"At first I went to New York and camped out with my brother for several months, but as I got to know the city a little better I knew it wasn't there I should live or work, it would just be Vegas all over again."

Sofia gave her a friendly smile and shrugged, "I did thought about changing my line of work but dismissed it I can't see myself being anything else than a detective, it's the only thing I ever wanted to be. But at the same time I knew for the time being I was done with the big cities."

"Like it said" she chuckled, "variety is the spice of life, so when my mother told they sought people here I got in contact with them, and yeah" she smiled, "here we are."

"Yep, here we are" Sara chuckled, she looked down and nodded towards Sofia's hands, "so still no one that have managed to put a ring on your finger or do you just don't wear it at work?"

"Well, unless I consider you work which I don't I'm not at work now," Sofia caught Sara's eyes and locked them, "but to answer your question, no I haven't met anyone since Vegas who has interested me enough or make me want to negotiation any serious relationship."

Sara broke the eye contact and looked down on the table, "to be honest" she said giving Sofia a little smile, "to this day I still don't understand why Gil picked me when he could have had you."

She briefly gazed at Sofia, "but if you're still interested then by all means feel free to give it a trial, as far as I know he's not seeing anyone, and truthfully I think he'll be much better off with you than he ever was with me."

Sofia just looked at Sara without saying anything, not sure if Sara really could be that clueless. Yes Sofia had been intellectual fascinated and had enjoyed discussing scientific literature with him but she had never been physically or emotionally attracted to Grissom.

She knew that from time to time and seen from a distance she had managed to make it look like she had flirted with him but that had all been an act a means to provoke some kind of reaction from the one sitting across the table right now.

Sofia was called back to reality by Sara's snapping fingers, "hey you, think you just felt asleep on me, maybe we should take a rain check on the dessert so you can get back to bed instead" Sara guffawed.

"Maybe" Sofia said, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "But nay, you are not getting away with cheating me out of dessert."

She picked up the menu and looked it over, "I want chocolate cake with whipped cream and fresh fruit."

Sara waved the waiter over and ordered coffee cake and some lime ice-cream and fresh fruit for herself, she looked back at Sofia, "someone still have a sweet tooth!"

Before Sofia could say anything Sara's pager began buzz after reading the message she called back, the lab tech told Sara what he had found which made her quite confuse, she asked him to start working on a specific sample and that she would come by within an hour.

Ending the call she smiled to Sofia, "sorry, but I have to go back to the lab when we're done eating."

Sofia nodded and asked what the call was about, so through rest of the dinner they didn't talk about anything else than the case. Sofia drove Sara back to the lab and asked her to call if they found anything useful. Getting out of the car she leaned in through the window and said goodnight as she stretched up Sofia's words reached her.

"You know Sara! Grissom was never the one I had my eye on." Before Sara could say or ask anything Sofia slowly rolled out on the parking lot and drove home.

Sara just stood and watched the car disappear around the corner, her brows lightly raised not really sure about what lay hidden in Sofia's statement. A well known tune stopped the thinking her face automatically lit up in a smile as she answered it.

"This is Crime Scene Investigator Sara Sidle speaking."

A mischievous giggle was heard, "you're crazy, mom."

"That may be" Sara laughed, "but as long as I'm crazy about you I think its okay. Have you had a good day, Sunbeam?"

"Uh-huh" Amy used the next couple of minutes telling about her day, "are you coming home tomorrow?"

"Yes I am sweetie, but probably not until toward evening time, but I'll write you just before I leave so you know when I'm home."

"Okay mom, better hang up now Ellen says its bedtime."

"Okay baby, sleep well and see you tomorrow." Sara closed the phone and went inside.

**Tbc…**


	11. Chapter 11

_**Chapter 11**_

Sofia plopped down on the couch with a beer in her hand low music playing in the background, despite feeling exhausted she knew sleep wouldn't come easy, Sara's unexpected appearance and all the turmoil it had brought along inside of her, would make sure of that.

No doubt seeing Sara again had gone straight to her gut and made everything inside her feel like a battle zone.

After leaving Vegas she had spent so much time trying to get the brunette out of her system. Sara had been if not the main reason for her to leave then at least the one that had made her decision finale.

Sofia had slowly realized that she'd fallen in love with the beautiful, but enigmatic, woman. In the beginning she had often wondered why she even had bothered Sara had from the outset made it crystal clear that she wasn't welcome and subsequently stayed as far away from her as possible… which virtually wasn't that far in the small lab.

Things had somewhat changed between them during the Melton case, Sofia had finally got a glimpse of the complex woman hidden underneath Sara's bitchy closed up appearance. Later, she had realized how much being trusted meant for Sara, so much, that the brunette subsequently had tried to act more friendly towards her and the beginning of a very fragilely friendship had begun, and surprisingly it had turned out they functioned well on a pure professional basis.

After her trip to Boulder City and switching from CSI to Detective their relationship had definitely changed and got much more pleasant, it had even got to a level where they had gone out together. Breakfast or listen to live music or hiking, not that they ever had referred to it as dating but still, it had left Sofia with a hope that given time they someday might be more than just friends.

But all of that had been shot to the ground when Sara got kidnapped and it had been revealed that she was with Grissom. She had stayed until Sara was found and it had been announced that she would survive.

She had gone by the hospital on her way out of town but without any idea what to say to Sara she never went inside and she never looked back as she pasted the city limit sign sure about Vegas and the people there was a closed chapter in her life.

Sofia sighed deeply, so much for that. It was not that she wasn't happy to see Sara and to see that she emotionally had managed get over the kidnapping and move on with her life; actually, it made her very happy.

But, what she didn't need was for her own emotions to start a new rollercoaster trip. What she had spent two years trying to bury, Sara had managed to open up again within 24 hours, and it had left her stunned, bewildered, confused and in a terrible condition of powerlessness and even worse it had left her in a situation she didn't know how to get out of.

Sofia got up and went to the bathroom well aware that she just would end up getting even more frustrated if she kept thinking, so she decided to give sleep a try.

Sara was greeted by the young lab tech that had called her earlier, "hey, hope I didn't disturbed you with my call."

"Hey, no that's okay, but I'm a bit confused about your finding. I still can't figure out how fire-resistant fiber ends up in a blood spatter on the floor."

The young man looked at her, "could be from one of the furniture some manufacturers put fire-resistant material in them as a precaution."

Sara went over to the glass table and looked at the pictures lying there, she lightly shook her head, "no I don't think so none of the furniture seems to have a rip in them and the rooms look like it's just be cleaned. It either has to come from the victim or the suspect. Did you find anything in the other sample I asked you to look at?"

He shook his head, "no there was no fiber in the blood found in the living room only from the one in the bedroom."

Sara narrowed her eyes, "we need to take a very close look at the woman's clothes to see if we can find the same fiber there."

"Okay, I will find it right away" the tech said.

Five hours later they had been through both the latest and the other know victims clothes without finding one matching fiber, Sara sighed as she put the last piece of clothes away not sure if it was a good or bad sign they hadn't managed to find any other fibers.

The young man scratched his head, "if I didn't knew how long it took for blood to coagulate I would suspect it was something the paramedics had brought along, but since that's not the case I'm blank to how it ended up there."

"Well" Sara said rubbing her eyes, "I think the only alternative is that the suspect left it there I just still can't put it in to any useful context," she gazed at the lab tech "hopefully Doug will be able to make an analyses that will narrow the specific use of the fiber down."

She gave him a tired smile, "I don't know about you but I definitely need some sleep and I don't think there's much more we can do right now so I will go back to the motel."

The young man yawned, "Yeah, think I'll call it a night too, see you tomorrow. Goodnight."

"Night" Sara said leaving the room.

While Sara and Doug ate breakfast together Sara had called John to tell him where they were and to hear if Doug was to return with her or if he should stay. Since there still was samples to examine and the fact that Doug definitely didn't mind staying it was decided that he would stay and keep the car with him so he could use the equipment in it, which meant that Sara would be taking the train home but she was fine with that.

After eating Sara went up to her room and packed her bag before meeting Doug on the parking lot, on their way to the lab she called the train station to hear the train's timetable and booked a ticket to the 3:25 p.m. train.

After saying their hellos Doug began working on the fiber sample. Sara sat down with a copy of the women's statements to see if she could find anything that could indicate where the fiber might came from but they all seemed to be the same story with slight variations. He had been wearing leather pants, leather jacket, a ski mask and gloves, after beating them up he had dragged them into the bedroom and blindfolded them before raping them so in every way there was nothing that could explained the fiber.

Around 3 p.m. Doug came over and told her that they had to leave if she didn't wanted to miss her train, she said bye to Gregory and promised to keep in touch. Before she got out of the car Doug promised to call the minute he knew more about the fiber, ten minutes later Sara left Sacramento by train.

As promised she called Amy but she barely had time to come to the phone, the whole family was at the bay swimming. Sara felt a bit disappointed but at the same time she was happy that Amy was doing fine and didn't seem to miss her to much, at least it made her feel less guilty leaving her for several days.

Late in the afternoon Sofia came by the lab after talking with Gregory she went over to Doug, "hey, Gregory mentioned a fiber, something that means anything?"

"Good question" Doug answered, "I'm still not done with it, but from what Sidle excluded during her work last night everything indicate that it's something the suspect brought along so hopefully it will make us wiser when I'm done with it."

"Speaking of…" Sofia looked around, "where does Sidle hide out?"

Doug looked up from the microscope, "Er, she is on her way back to Frisco."

"What? Why… has anything happened?"

Doug gazed at Sofia in wonder, "um, no not that I'm aware of she just have some personally matters that needs her attention."

Sofia suddenly got very conscious about her behavior, "sorry, none of my business," she quickly got control over herself, "you just surprised me" she smiled, "the Sidle I used to work with back in Vegas was impossible to drag out of the lab before the case was solved."

"I bet" Doug grinned "and trust me" he said winking at her, "she can still make everyone's day a living hell if she wants too."

He lit up in a sweet smile, "but I'm not complaining, I like working with her, she has a cool sense of humor and you are always learning something new whenever you work a case with her, think I have learned more about science through working with her than I ever learned in school."

As much as Sofia wanted to ask if he knew if Sara would be coming back she held her tongue, "well, please let me know if there comes anything useful out of your test" she said walking towards the door.

"I will" Doug insured, "oh, and Detective? I'm sure she'll be back the minute there's something new to the case, she hasn't changed that much, she still likes closing a case" he said encouraging.

Walking back to her car Sofia cursed herself, the last thing she needed was for people start talking especially if she was the topic. Actually she didn't even understand why she had reacted the way she did to the news about Sara's disappearance, it wasn't like she expected her to stay around forever, anyway. But a, see you later! Or goodbye could have been nice.

After arriving in Frisco Sara went by the crime lab to pick up her car she briefly talked with John who ordered her to stay home the next day, she went by Craig's home and picked Amy up, they made a stop on their way home and picked up dinner and soon after they were both seated at the kitchen table eating.

Dinner took quite some time; Sara several times had to tell Amy not to forget to eat but they finally got through both dinner and all the things Amy had experienced during the weekend.

"How was Sacramento?" Amy asked curious.

"Hmm, I didn't really see that much of the city except their crime lab" Sara answered.

"That sounds boring" Amy replied disappointed.

"Yeah maybe, but I was there to work and not on a vacation" Sara chuckled, "but I met an old colleague from back when I worked in Vegas."

"Okay, is he a lab rat like you?" Amy snickered.

Sara's eyes widen, "you have a nerve!" She reached out and grabbed Amy and pulled her to her lap, "did you just call me a lab rat?" She asked tickling the girl.

Amy laughed and squirmed in Sara's arms, "yes, Uncle Craig says you're a lab rat" Amy stuttered.

"Does he now" Sara lightly growled, "think I better pull his ear next time I see him." Sara stopped tickling Amy, "nope sweetie, she doesn't work in a lab she's a detective."

Amy's eyes widen, "whao, that's cool does she drives around in a squad car and shoot the bad guys?"

"Wow, wow, baby, think someone has watched a bit too much TV" Sara chuckled, "she drives an ordinary car and for your information it's not allowed just shooting people."

Amy winkled her nose, "that doesn't sounds like fun, then I rather be a CSI like you at least you get to use your tools. Was it fun meting her again?"

"Fortunately you don't have to make up your mind just yet what kind of education you want to pursuit" Sara smiled. "Yes, it was nice meeting her again and a big surprise I didn't know she had moved to Sacramento."

Amy yawned, "Sacramento isn't that far away so maybe you'll meet her again," she cuddled further into Sara, "or she could come by for dinner like my friends do, Adam says you are a good cook" she said with a sleepy voice.

"Yeah, I have notices he likes my food" Sara softly laughed. She got up still carrying Amy, "think we better get you to bed."

After tucking Amy in Sara went to the kitchen and cleaned up after dinner and made a mug of coffee, she checked her computer to see if Doug had come up with anything but so far he hadn't so she went into the living room and turned on the TV. Done flipping through the canals without finding anything remotely interesting she turned it off again and just enjoyed the silence.

Her thoughts quickly resumed back to the case and from there to Sofia. It had been a strange feeling suddenly being face to face with her again and even more strange realizing that she had missed her, but she had.

Turbulent, was probably the best word to describe how their 'friendship' had been, and mostly thanks to her. But the fact that Sofia always had managed to make her feel incredibly exposed whenever they had been around each other and that it wasn't something that she was use to had often made her feel uncomfortable around the detective and instead of chase off the nervousness that normally would make her doubt herself she simply had pull away.

It hadn't been until her and Grissom was a couple she had dared analyzing what it was that made her feel so uncomfortable around Sofia, and honest to herself the answer hadn't really been a big surprise.

Deep within herself she knew almost from the first time she had seen Sofia that she complimented her in ways no one had before. She had wormed her way into Sara's heart with her kindness and bravery and sweetness and kick-ass attitude, and trying to avoid her attraction had only sharpened her awareness of the detective.

Sensing the conflicting emotions welling up from her body Sara sighed and rubbed her face, she had made such an effort for so long to ignore it but it was still a sore spot and no one liked being reminded of past stupidities. But there was no avoiding that Sofia here and now on some level was back in her life and she seriously doubted there were anything in her extensive emotional arsenal that stand a chance to resist that sweet, self-confident smile.

Sara slowly shook her head not really sure about how to deal with it all but the sensible thing to do ought to be taking it slow and see if she could figure out how Sofia was feeling and then simply just take it from there.

Sara got up and found her phone she suddenly realized that she had left without even saying goodbye; she flipped it open and started writing a message.

_-Hey you… sorry for leaving without saying bye, simply lost track of time …no nothing new there :-D… nice meting you again, enjoyed dinner, maybe we can repeat it someday? Hug S.S_

It didn't take long before an answer replied.

_-Hey yourself… better late than never I guess ;-) likewise seeing you, and yes you can take me to dinner any day especially if you are paying :-D have you heard from Doug? Hug S.C_

_-So funny dear… saying thank you don't mean paying for your meal for the rest of my life :-P not after seeing how much you can consume :-D no haven't heard from him think he would try some special tests _

_-__Cheapskate ;-D I didn't eat that much and if it comes to repaying I could think of a few other things I would prefer instead ;-) _

_-Um, do I even want to know what's on your mind? :-D _

_-Right now, um, no probably not :-P _

_-Thought so :-D well better let you get back to work, talk to you later _

_-Later Sidle _

Next morning when Sara woke up Amy was sitting in the bed as she was most mornings without opening her eyes Sara wrapped her arm around the girl and pulled her under the duvet with her.

"Morning Sunbeam, slept well?"

"Mmm, and now I'm hungry" Amy giggled.

Sara stretched her body, "guess we better get up then."

As they were eating Amy looked at Sara, "do we have a sleeping bag?"

Sara narrowed her eyes, "hmm, no I don't think so and I guess one is required for your camp school, actually," Sara continued, "I was thinking about keeping your home from school today and get you all the things you need."

Amy's eyes widen, "you mean like, play hooky?"

Amy's face expression made Sara laugh, "Mmm, I haven't seen you the whole weekend and you are going camping from Wednesday to Saturday with your school so I won't see you there either, and since I'm off work today it could be nice spending the day with you. We could take a trip to the mall and get you all the stuff that you need for your upcoming camping trip."

Amy tilted her head, "guess we could, we're not to hear about the trip before tomorrow, anyway. Can we go by the bay for a swim afterwards?"

"Sure if the weather keeps up and we don't wait too long to before we get on our way."

Amy got up and placed her plate in the sink, "I'll go changes right away and find my bathing suit."

"Okay, and don't forget to wash your face and brush your teeth either."

Before taking a shower Sara called the school to let them know that Amy wasn't coming and to hear what exactly was required for the trip. About an hour later they arrived at the mall and their first stop was at the Camping store.

"Hello, we need at sleeping bag for this young lady" Sara said to the salesman.

"Hello, right this way" the man said, "what kind of purpose is it meant for?"

"I'm going on a camping trip with my school" Amy answered.

"That sounds like fun" the salesman smiled, "will you be sleeping inside or outside?"

"Inside, there are lodges scattered around the main building where the kids will be sleeping" Sara replied.

The man nodded and found several bags in Amy's size, "all of these should be able to keep you warm" he said to Amy, "so see anyone you like?"

"Mmm" Amy nodded, "the pink one.

"Think that's a very good choice" the salesman chuckled, "anything else you need?"

"Yep, she'll need a flashlight and lots of batteries" Sara gazed around, "and a pair of hiking boots and some waterproof clothes."

When they were done and since it was a warm day they went to the ice-cream store to get an ice-cream, afterwards Sara brought Amy with her to the IT store.

"Hello, I would like to see your selection on cell phones" Sara said to the woman behind the counter.

"That's a lot of phones" the woman chuckled, "perhaps we could try narrowing it down a bit. Any specific demand it has to fulfill?"

Sara's brow arched, "hmm, I don't know except it has to be easy to use, something with a touch screen, perhaps?"

"Okay, is it a present or is it for you?"

"Neither, actually it's for my daughter. She is going on a school camp and I don't like the idea of not being able to get in contact with her or the other way around."

Amy looked at Sara in disbelieve, "whoa, I'm getting my own phone; none in my class has their own phone. Mom, are you sure we are allowed to bring a phone?"

Sara gave her a grin, "well someone has to be the first, and yes you're allowed, I asked when I called your school, you just have to keep it closed during the day." She looked back at the saleswoman, "so any suggestion?"

"I might" the woman smiled, "at least I think I can narrow it down to three that both are easy to maneuver and very reliable. If I was to choose I would either go for an Apple iPhone, the Google Nexus One or HTC Touch Cruise," she went over to one of the glass shelves and came back with all three.

Both tried all three of them but Amy couldn't really decide which one she liked the most so Sara finally made that decision. "Sweetie, I think the Google phone is the wisest to pick, it works directly on the internet which I think can come in handing if you at some point need to look something up regarding homework and not are near your computer."

Amy picked the phone up and tried it again, "it really is fast" she gave Sara a mischievous grin, "I have already found the fastest way to the bay."

"Okay" Sara laughed, "Seems you already know how to use it." She looked back at the woman, "we will take that one."

"Good choice" the woman said as she packed all the accessories into a bag.

After paying they went back to the car, Amy directed them to the bay through her phone and soon after they were both in the water swimming.

After returning home they got a light lunch before cuddling up on the sofa in the library each with a book in hand and it didn't take long before both dozed off.

**Tbc…**


	12. Chapter 12

_**Chapter 12**_

Sara's phone woke her up, "Sidle."

"Hey Sara its Doug, did I wake you?" He chuckled.

"Yeah guess so" she answered as she got up from the sofa, she quietly left the room not to wake Amy up. "So do you have any news about the fiber?"

"Yeah and…" he said grudgingly, "I don't think you goner like it."

Sara sighed, "Let me guess it didn't lead to anything" she said frustrated as she walked to the kitchen and turned on the electric kettle.

"If only as" Doug replied, "actually, you only find this particular fiber in a protective suit like those we use when we are working on a scene that might be contagious."

Sara took the instant coffee out of the cupboard and put some in a mug before pouring the boiling water over it, "I know which one you mean but I don't see that that helps us in any way you can buy those at any painter to prevent getting paint on your clothes."

"Except they are far from alike, trust me, there's a reason why we don't throw ours out when we are done using them, they are very unique, the fabric is weaved and prepared so nothing can get in or out, and the threads are weaved in a way so they don't lint unless its torn apart to prevent we accidently transmit anything. This is not a protective suit you can buy anywhere" Doug explained.

Sara took a sip of the hot coffee, "so you think someone has stolen one of our suits?"

Doug sighed, "See that's why I thought you wouldn't like it, that's practical impossible, they are so expensive that every crime lab keeps account with their suits. You have to fill out a form and deliver your suit back if you ruin it before you can get a new one, and most labs demand that you buy a new one if your old one gets stolen, so most of us don't even bring it along unless it's required." He paused for a long moment, "I think whoever raped these women somehow are connected to a crime lab."

Sara thought for awhile, "guess that would explain why we haven't managed to find any trace of him, you can open the suit from the bottom so he doesn't have to take it off which protects him from leaving anything of himself behind." She scratched her scalp, "but I suppose every lab gets their suits from the same company, and even if he has discovered that his suit is torn I don't think he's stupid enough to turn it in, and there is no guarantee that he is from Sacramento he could be driving in from another city, so if we look just within a radius of a three hours drive that's still a lot of labs."

"Yeah but we might finally be in a little of luck, I talked with the company that makes the protective clothing and each lab indeed has their own color code weaved into their suits. Whenever we use our suits they are sent back to the company to be cleaned up for toxic chemicals and given a close up examination for flaws, and to make sure each suit goes back to the right lab each crime lab is assigned with their unique code. So I have sent the fiber to the company and he promised to call back tomorrow with the information of which lab the fiber belongs to."

"Great job, Doug, have you told Gregory?"

"Er, no I haven't told anyone. If the code comes back to this lab, um, then I guess all the male here is a suspect."

"Guess you have a point there," Sara chuckled a bit, "not that I really can picture Gregory being the one. Okay, let's wait until you hear from the company before we say or do anything, but then I will suggest you take the rest of the day off because if detective Curtis begins to suspect that you know anything she won't let you rest until you tell."

"No, I'm under the same perception" Doug chortled. So are you planning on returning?"

"If the answer turns up usable and John thinks it's necessary then I might return Wednesday after sending Amy off to camp school."

"Okay, think the detective will appreciate that she seemed quite surprised when she heard you had left," Doug smirked cocky. "Any interesting story you want to share?"

Sara cheeks turned light pink, "nothing I care to share with you" she answered with an evasive voice, "that's merely any of your business."

"Chill Sidle" Doug guffawed "just saying…"

"If you know what's best for you, you won't say anything" Sara retorted chuckling, "or I will set a certain detective at you! Don't think you want that."

"No offence intended" Doug laughed, "better get out of here before she turns up. Call you tomorrow when I have heard from the company. Later Sidle and say hey to Amy for me."

"Will do" Sara replied, "talk to you tomorrow. Bye Doug."

As Sara closed the phone the doorbell rang walking towards the door Amy came out from the study room, Sara opened the front door and faced Jasmine and Adam.

"Hey Sara, sorry to disturb you but Adam insisted we walked by to hear if Amy goner be fit to their camp" Jasmine smiled apologetic.

"Hey, it's okay, want to come in?" Sara answered.

"Yep" Adam grinned and went over to Amy.

Amy leaned forward and whispered to Adam, "I'm not sick, I play hooky" she snickered.

Adams eyes widen, "does your mother know?" he whispered back "or are you in trouble now?"

"No its fine she knows, actually it was her idea."

"Whoa, you got a cool mom" Adam said.

"Mmm. Mom, we are going to my room so Adam can show me what they have been doing in school today."

"Okay sweetie." Sara looked at Jasmine, "time for a cup of coffee?"

"Yes please" Jasmine answered following Sara to the kitchen, "she seems to be doing better."

"Probably because she isn't sick" Sara chuckled, "I kept her home today from pure selfish reasons, I have been out of town all weekend and now she is going on camp so I just wanted to spend a whole day with her" she admitted.

"Yeah" Jasmine smiled, "the first couple of times away from them are always the hardest."

The kids came back to the kitchen, "mom, Amy just got a cell phone can I get one too?" Adam asked.

"No you can't sweetie, you don't need your own phone we have plenty at home" Jasmine answered.

"But mom, that's not the same you can't take them with you and what if you need to talk with me while I'm not home?" Adam kept trying.

Jasmine began laughing, "Adam, you can barely remember putting your shoes on before going out so I seriously doubt you'll remember bringing your phone, and since the rule is that you are to tell me where you are going I'm sure I'll managed to find you even without a phone."

"Adam, the reason why Amy got the phone is due to my job, I can't always count on being able to leave on time so I need to be able to get in contact with her if anything happens or I'm running late" Sara explained. "But we could put your mom's number into it and then the two of you can share it while you're on camp, that way you still can call home if you need to."

"Okay" Adam agreed, "If Amy doesn't mind sharing."

"Nope that's fine" Amy answered, "just need the number."

Sara wrote the number down, Amy took it and both kids went back to her room, Sara then wrote Amy's number down and handed it to Jasmine. "We can only call them on this number in the evening they aren't allowed to keep it open during the day."

"Okay" Jasmine nodded, "I actually had thought about letting him borrow mine since there's only a few payphones there, I only talked to his sister once when she went because she simply refused standing in a phone line for hours. Just hope they have come up with a solution to all the stealing or I'm afraid they won't have the phone for long" Jasmine sighed.

"That bad, huh?"

"Yeah, at least Carrie was wise enough to keep all of her money in her pocket whenever she went anywhere, but I seriously doubt Adam will remember to do the same."

"Perhaps I should borrow one of the suitcases with a combination lock at work then they can lock their things up whenever they are leaving the lodge" Sara small-laughed "I'm pretty sure none of the children has the abilities to pick that lock, and it's so smart it automatic change the number the second you opened it so no one can see the code."

"Well, if they don't mind you're borrowing it then I think it would be a good idea. Oh, while I remember it, can Adam stay here after school tomorrow? I have a sales meeting tomorrow afternoon so I can't make it home before him and I don't want him to be home alone."

"Sure not a problem, you can just swing by and pick him up on your way home."

"Thanks" Jasmine smiled, she looked at her watch, "better get home at start dinner," She got up and called out for Adam, "see you tomorrow Sara, bye."

"Bye Jasmine and Adam see you tomorrow."

It was late afternoon the next day when Doug called back.

Sara answered via her headset, "Sidle."

"Hey Sara its Doug, can you speak?"

"Hey Doug, yeah I'm on my way to pick Amy up. So heard from the company?"

"Yes I have, the suit belongs to Sacramento crime lab! So what do I do now? I have no idea to whom I can trust here."

Sara exhaled loudly, "me neither. Doug, I think you have to talk with detective Curtis and let her know what you have found out, it's her district so I'm fairly sure she knows most of the people working around her and can tell you who you supposedly should be able to trust."

"Okay, I'll go talk to her, but I really hope you get out here again ´cause quite frankly, I have no idea where to go from here."

"Look, when I have put Amy to bed I'll give John a call and ask him what he suggests. Meanwhile start checking if anyone has returned a suit since Friday, and subsequently check the delivery notes from the returned suits that way we'll know what they have been cleaned for, and go back to when the rapes began."

"Seems no matter how far away you are, you know how to put people into work" Doug grinned, "but I will go talk to the good detective and then start looking into the other matters."

"Well, you did ask" Sara laughed into the receiver, "Give me a call if you find anything. Have to hang up; I'm at Amy's school now."

"Okay later, Sidle" Doug said before hanging up.

Sara got out of the car to greet Amy and Adam, "hi you two how were school?"

"Hi mom, great we spend all day hearing about our trip and make all the preliminary things."

"The preliminary things?" Sara asked questioningly.

"Mmm" Adam nodded as he climbed into the car, "like sleep arrangement and stuff."

"Yeah and we were divided into groups" Amy supplemented.

"Did the two of you get in the same group then?"

"Yep" Amy confirmed.

"And we are also sharing the same lodge" Adam added.

"Whao" Sara said with obvious amusement, "I wouldn't expect the school allowing boys and girls sleeping together."

"Well, technically we aren't" Amy said, "There are two sleeping rooms in each lodge, so the boys will be sleeping in one and the girls in the other."

"We are living with those we are in group with and there are three girls and boys in each group" Adam told.

The kids kept going on about the camp until Jasmine came and picked Adam up. After eating it was time to pack Amy's suitcase. Sara had borrowed one with a lock at work so while they were packing Amy was practicing on the combination, afterwards it was bathing time and they ended the day with another chapter in their bedtime book. When Sara came back to the living room a messaged was lying on her cell phone from Doug.

_-Hey so far nothing, don't thing it has been turned in didn't get a hold at the detective she wasn't in when I went by but I left her a note to call me which she still hasn't. Hope I'll see you tomorrow D _

It was a girl filled with eager expectations Sara drove to school the next day, Adam came over the minute he saw the car and told Amy he already had reserved two seats in the bus. Amy gave Sara a big hug and promised to call in the evening and then she went into the bus with Adam. Sara, Glenn and Jasmine just small talked and waved until the bus drove off.

Glenn glanced at his watch, "honey we need to leave or we both goner be late for work. See you Sara."

"Yeah, better get on my way to" Sara smiled, "see you two."

A couple of hours later Sara parked in front for the crime lab in Sacramento, she went inside and found Doug sitting at the light table, "hey you, still nothing?"

"Hey Sara, nice to see you. Nope and this was the last note."

"Hmm, well guess it was what we expected. Heard from the detective?"

"No, which surprises me, wonder if she ever got my message" Doug said.

"Guess there's only one way to find out, lets pay her a visit" Sara suggested.

Doug shrugged, "sure why not." They went over to the precinct and asked for Sofia's office; since the door was open Doug knocked on the door frame and walked inside. "Hello Detective, are you trying to avoid me?" He chuckled.

"Hmm, no not that I'm aware of" Sofia smiled without looking up from the papers she was reading, "why do you think that?"

"Er, because I left you a note yesterday saying you should call me" Doug grinned, "and to the best of my knowledge I still haven't heard from you."

"Sorry but I haven't seen any note from you but give me a sec and you will have my full attention" Sofia said as she reached the last page.

Sara who stood leaning up against the door frame started chuckling, "Doug, I don't think she want to hear what you have to say, it only means more work for her."

Sofia's heart picked up a beat as she heard Sara's voice, "Sara Sidle" she smirked as she looked up, "yeah, it's always work having you around. Welcome back" she smiled.

"Hey Sofia" Sara smiled back, "can we talk private here?"

Sofia narrowed her brows, "yes of course just closed the door."

Sara closed the door, "good, ´cause you don't goner like what we are about to tell you," Sara said as her and Doug sat down.

"Why don't you tell it Doug" Sara said, "I'm pretty sure you have the detectives full attention now."

"Yeah, you seem to have that influence on people" Doug chuckled.

He quickly told Sofia what he had found out and what he subsequently had been working on, and that they needed to figure out who she thought they could trust in the lab.

Sofia sighed and rubbed her face, "damn a way to start the day! I know it isn't Gregory since I was with him when one of the rapes happened and the women should be cleared as well, but it's a quite new team so I really don't know many of them very good and I suspect the employees around the team are suspects to."

She leaned back in her chair, "I don't think you should incorporate other than Amanda and Gregory into your investigation, the fewer that knows about this the better. So, where do we go from here?"

Doug scratched his head, "I have absolutely no idea what so ever." He gazed at Sara and raised a brow.

"Hmm, I might have a few suggestions, but first of all I would like to know what kind of guy we are looking for" Sara said looking pensive, "and I think I know just who to speak with." She looked at Sofia "can I borrow your phone?"

"Yeah sure" Sofia said pushing the phone towards Sara.

Sara picked up the receiver, "operator hello could you please connect me to BAU Quantico, Virginia… hello I would like to speak with Special Agent Louisa Stone…" Sara put the phone on speaker.

"Special Agent Louisa Stone speaking."

"Hey sweetheart" Sara chortled.

The line shortly went silent… "No fucking way… Butchy, is that you?"

"Yep it's me" Sara answered laughing "and please watch your language your on the speaker."

"Bite me, Butchy!" Louisa grinned.

"Now, now, you know work before pleasure" Sara laughed.

"Hmm, still bitchy when it comes to work, huh?"

"Fuck you!" Sara smirked.

"Always Butchy, dinner first?" Louisa laughed out.

Sofia and Doug gazed at each other half in disbelieve, Sara coughed slightly, "let me refresh your memory, you're on the speaker, now back to work."

"So you keep saying" Louisa chuckled, "but okay work, what can I help you with, Sara?"

"We are trying to find a serial rapist but we have no idea of what type of person we are looking for." Sara told her all they knew and why they could use some help narrowing the numbers of suspects down.

"No it's never easy when you are doing an investigation inside the house" Louisa replied, "fax me a copy of all the things you have then I'll take a look at it and see if I can't come up with a profile of what kind of man you are looking for."

"Thanks, appreciate that" Sara answered, "talk to you later."

"Yep" Louisa let out an amused snort "bye for now, Sara."

"Butchy" Doug smirked devilishly, "care to elaborate for example who was that?"

Sara shrugged, "just my old roommate at Berkeley" she nonchalant answered, "guess we should go back to the lab and initiate Gregory and Amanda into the new development in the case," she looked at Sofia, "call you when we know any more."

"Wouldn't expect anything less" Sofia smiled.

Sara faxed all the things they had and knew to Louisa, afterwards all four went into one of the smaller rooms where Doug told what he had discoverer and even though Gregory was the supervisor he didn't knew the other team or anyone else that came through the lab good enough to exclude anyone.

Subsequently, they decided to examine the protective suits lying in the storeroom, Amanda swabbed them for DNA on the inside, Doug was doing the DNA tests while Sara and Gregory was giving them a close up examine under the microscope for any rips. It was the beginning of the evening before they were done; Amanda briefly glanced at the watch hanging on the wall.

"Gregory, wasn't you suppose to be home by now?"

Gregory looked at the watch, "oops! Yes I am" he said gazing at Sara and Doug, "sorry but I have to leave it's my son's birthday and I promised I would be home to eat dinner with him."

"Congratulations on your son" Sara smiled, "that's okay there isn't really much more we can do right now anyway."

"Congratulations" Doug strike up, "the DNA tests won't be ready before tomorrow and we need Sara's friend to call back before we can begin narrowing the suspects down, so have a nice birthday."

"Thanks guys" Gregory replied leaving the room.

"Want to join us for dinner?" Amanda asked Sara.

"Thanks, but no thanks, it's been a long day and I still haven't checked in at the motel, but have fun and see you two tomorrow" Sara answered.

"Okay" they said, "see you tomorrow, Sidle."

Sara's phone started ringing as they left the room "hi sweetie!"

"Hi mom, want to hear about my day?"

"Always" Sara smiled, so for the next five minutes Sara didn't say much else than "uh-huh…really…aha with some laughing in between. "Sure sounds like you have had a busy day, Sunbeam."

"Mmm, but it has been fun. Are you in Sacramento now?" Amy asked.

"Yes I am baby, so I'm close to you it only takes about an hour to drive from Sacramento to Lagoon Lake."

"Okay, I'll look it up on my map later, better hang up so Adam can call his mom. Talk to you tomorrow, bye mom."

"Sure sweetie, sleep well."

Sara closed the phone, put on her jacket and went outside as she got to her car a voice reached her.

"Done for the day, Sidle?"

Sara turned towards the voice, "well, unless you are bringing work with you, Detective, I should think so, at least for now" Sara smirked.

"No you bring enough as it is" Sofia quipped chuckling, "so got time for dinner?"

"Well…" Sara hesitated, "actually I was thinking about going by the motel to check in and I really could use a shower too, so…"

"Mmm, but I would think you still need to eat" Sofia smirked "so what are you trying to avoid me?"

Sara narrowed her eyes, "I'm not trying to avoid you, but I would prefer sleeping in a bed instead of my car" she replied with a self-defending voice.

"Well, one need doesn't necessarily have to exclude another" Sofia said with a mischievous glint in her eyes, "if you like to share a meal, then why don't you check in and get a shower while I pick up some takeaway and bring it over?"

Sara chuckled, "fine Detective, I want Chinese and bring a six-pack as well."

"As you wish" Sofia grinned as she climbed into her car, "see you soon, Sidle."

**Tbc… **


	13. Chapter 13

_**Chapter 13**_

Sara got a room and a shower before Sofia arrived, they both got a beer and placed the rest in the mini-fridge before sitting down out on the balcony eating.

"Num" Sara said with her mouth full, "this is really good."

"So I see" Sofia grinned cocky, "you surely eat well for someone who declined dinner."

"Bite me" Sara retorted chuckling.

"Don't tempt me, Sidle" Sofia shot back.

"Wouldn't dare" Sara replied chewing on a mouthful of noodles.

"Wimp" Sofia smirked mischievously taking a bit of her spring roll.

Sara raised a brow and shot her a glance, "fuck you, Curtis."

"Offering?" Sofia cocky chuckled, "see that could be a lovely dessert."

"You didn't bring dessert? And that's after calling me a cheapskate" Sara retorted laughing.

Sofia shrugged and smiled, so typical Sara to answer a question with a question, "There are five different courses here so didn't expect you to have room for dessert."

Sara leaned back and rested her hands on her stomach, "nay, you're probably right don't think I could consume another bite even if my life depended on it. How much do I owe you for dinner?"

Sofia got up and gathered the empty boxes before turning towards Sara, she bent down and rested her hands on the armrest and looked into Sara's eyes, "nothing!" She said wiggling her brows, "since you are taking me out to dinner tomorrow."

"I am?" She asked with a smile playing in the corner of her mouth, at the same time Sara was surprised about it didn't feel awkward having Sofia standing so close. She shrugged, "guess even a strong independent woman like to be serviced now and then" she laughed softly.

"Mmm, she does" Sofia smiled, "especially when she is escorted by delightful company," she pushed herself up, "want another beer?"

"Yes please." Sofia went inside with the empty boxes and returned with two cold beers she sat down and handed Sara one. "Thanks. So do you like living here?" Sara asked.

"Yes I do, it's very satisfying having a job that not only revolves death like it often did in Vegas and I have some great colleagues. I like the town; except for the bay I would think it reminds a lot of Frisco just a bit smaller." Sofia chuckled, "and in contrast to Vegas, it actually is possible to have a personnel life here. What about you, planning on staying in Frisco?"

"Yeah, think my moving days are over. In lots of ways I can't say I regret moving to Vegas, don't think I could have learned so much anywhere else, but like you said a human can only overcome so much death. I have nice colleagues some of them go back to before Vegas and I have a great supervisor." Sara gave her a smile, "but it did take some adaptation suddenly working in the day hours after years in the dark, but I like it."

"That was the thing I hated most after my degradation, I never understood how anyone voluntarily would want to work the night shift. Not that I mind working in the evening or night if a case demands it, but I really prefer being up with the sun." Sofia briefly glanced at Sara's hands, "so seeing anyone or are Grissom still in your life even if you live in different cities?"

Sara snorted, "Think relationship is the last thing that has been on my mind since I left Vegas, and regarding Grissom no, he's not a figure in my life anymore. I did spent a couple of day with him when I went back to Warwick's funeral, but it only confirmed what I already knew, that we wasn't right for each other. But a part of me will always love him, no matter what, he always stood up for me and have been there whenever I needed him and I don't think I could ever ask for a better friend. I know it took him a bit longer to realize it but today we both know that we are better off just being friends. Speaking of… how did your appendix operation go?"

Sofia's eyes widen, "how do you know about that?"

Sara small laughed and shrugged, "you do know I am an investigator, right? No I just got concerned and suspected something was wrong when I didn't see you at Warwick's funeral, it's just to unlike you not to show up for a thing like that, so I asked Brass if he still was in contact with you and knew why you weren't there."

"Oh! Yeah it went fine; the doc just wouldn't allow that I took such a long trip only two days after my operation." Sofia gave her a mischievous glance, "literally concerned, huh?"

"Yeah, impressing how many weird emotions a funeral can produce" Sara replied teasing, a light shiver ran through her, "mind going inside, it's getting a bit chilly."

Sofia got up and followed Sara inside, both sat down on the little sofa standing in the room. "But that doesn't change the fact that that you thought of me. Admit it, Sidle, you like me or you wouldn't have asked about me" Sofia said with an amused voice.

"I can see your self-confidence is still intact" Sara smirked. "But let's pretend you're right in that conjecture and obviously conscious about it, then guess it leaves me with a question, which of the following possibilities made you decide to leave Vegas?"

Sara narrowed her brows and tilted her head, "was it, that you wasn't interested working in an environment where you were forced to work with me because you didn't like me, or were your feelings reciprocated but you simply were too scared to let me know because you were afraid about how I would react to it?"

Sofia rose to get a new round of beers and to think over if she should take advantage of the golden opportunity she just had been given for letting Sara know how she was feeling. It hadn't been before seeing Sara again she had realized how hard it had been to walk away from Vegas, and Sara, from even the slightest possibility that maybe …_just_ maybe… given the right circumstances love could arise between them one day.

Worst scenario, Sara wouldn't be interested but at least then she would know and maybe once and for all get her out of her system. Best scenario, that Sara wouldn't completely shut down but be willing to look further into their mutual attraction. Sofia returned to the sofa and sat down close to Sara, now was the time to figure things out once and for all.

"I think you're forgetting a third option" she said holding Sara's gaze, "I liked you a lot, still do, but when it was announced that you and Grissom were a couple my last reason for staying in Vegas disappeared. I simply couldn't stay and face you everyday knowing I never would get a chance to be with you."

Sofia moistened her lips, "but moving away haven't changed anything, even though I've been fighting it I'm still attracted to you and my attraction have been ducking in and out my head this whole time since you showed up here in Sacramento."

Sofia took a deep breath, "Sara, I have feelings for you that go way beyond friendly and I really would like a chance to spend more time with you on a personally level, a chance for both of us to get to know each other better, to be given the opportunity to see if we have a chance for a relationship."

Sofia stopped talking there wasn't really more to say, she had put it out in the open and now all she could do was to await Sara's respond, what happened from there on would entirely be up to the brunette.

Sara sat staring into space not really sure about how to respond, meeting Sofia again definitely had awakened her own feelings, and with Sofia's admission, it suddenly and unexpected had opened up a possibility she until now only had dreamed about but never thought possible.

But one thing was to be dreaming about having someone in your life… but suddenly to be given the opportunity of that dream to come true was… staggering and… terrifying!

But so much had changed in her life since Vegas it wasn't only about her own wishes anymore! She was a mother now, which meant, that every decision she made also would have an influence on Amy's life.

No doubt, Amy would always be the highest priority in her life, but that shouldn't necessarily mean that she couldn't get committed in a relationship in the long term as long as it was with someone who Amy also liked. So if they were to take things slow and just see in what direction things would develop between them, then Sara concluded there wasn't really a reason for her not to look further into this mutual feeling between her and Sofia.

A quiet sigh left Sofia as she got up and walked towards the door, right now she could handle everything except Sara's silent treatment, not that it in anyway should surprise her, but still, it hurt! As she reached for the door knob Sara's voice brought her movement to a stop.

"Stay!"

Normally, Sofia gave herself credit for being good at hearing the slight different nuances in people's voices, but right now she couldn't tell if Sara was demanding or pleading. Neither did she hear Sara leaving the sofa, so she flinched back against the door when she turned around and found the brunette standing right in front of her.

"You can't say a thing like that and then leave" Sara slowly raised her hand and tugged a lose tuft of Sofia's hair behind her ear. "I'm not good with expressing my feelings," she said and then broke off, smiling wryly. "Not that you don't know that already." She placed her hand on Sofia's cheek and gently let her thumb caressing over the cheekbone, "but at least, give me a sec to let your words sink in before you give up getting an answer."

A low groan escaped Sofia as she felt Sara's hand on her skin, "I'm sorry I just…"

Sara's thumb on her lips brought Sofia to silence, "I want the same chance, they same things as you do it's just…" Sara sighed softly, "My life has changed in so many ways since I left Vegas, there are so many things you don't know about me about my life…"

Now it was Sofia who brought Sara to silence with her index finger, "and there are things in my life you don't know about either. Sara, I don't except you to lay out your entire life here and now that can come as we go along. All I want is a chance to get to know you, a promise that you won't disappear out of my life again when this case is over."

Sofia slowly let her hand slid along Sara's jawbone and onto her neck. "I have feelings for you Sara. I have very strong feelings for you to be exact. And they are real, so real that every time I see you standing in front of me you take my breath away and make me weak in the knees."

Sara leaned forward until her lips almost were in contact with Sofia's,_**"**__**And when the future hinges on the next words that are said. Don't let logic interfere, believe your heart instead."**_ She whispered before ever so lightly letting her lips brush over Sofia's.

"Philip Robinson" Sofia barely got out before Sara's mouth descended on hers and she lost herself in her demanding kiss.

Hot and brazen, Sara's tongue slithered between Sofia's parting lips, moving in as if it owned her mouth, seeking and mapping it out. Sofia clung to Sara's shoulders, slightly dizzy; the brunette's slender hands curved to cup her ass and pressed the blonde up against her.

Sofia whimpered into her mouth, busily letting her tongue slide around Sara's, fighting the need to breathe as her fingers dug deeper into her shoulders.

Sara pulled away gasping, eyes searching Sofia's face. Sofia cupped Sara's face, fingers splaying out to hold it as she felt her mouth on hers again, hot, demanding. Sweet sloppy kisses echoed through the room, and Sofia lost track of how long they stood entangled there, fighting for erotic dominance in the wet duel of their tongues.

Gradually Sara pulled back, Sofia's head thumping against the wood of the door as she tried to catch her breath. Sara pressed her lips to the side of Sofia's neck and let her teeth nip the skin. Sofia weakly moaned as pleasure from Sara's lips sent spirals of slinky heat down her spine one of her legs slid around the brunettes, bringing their bodies into closer contact against the door, Sara groaned at the enticing pressure and kissed her again.

Sara released Sofia's lips and looked into her eyes; carefully she cupped her face, "we have to stop this now or I won't be able to stop at all" she sultry whispered.

"I don't want you to stop" Sofia softly answered, "I know we need to take this slow but I'm not going to vanish just because we sleep together, I mean it Sara I want so much more from you than just sex, I want you to be a part of my life, to be a part of your life, and because we do this" she gestured at them, "ain't goner change that."

"God, I want you so much, Sof" Sara gasped as her mouth once again found the blondes.

Without letting go of her lips Sara guided her down onto the bed, the combined weight making the mattress creak under them but both was utterly caught up in the muscled heat of their bodies pressing together, thighs and hips and stomachs, to notice.

Sara broke the kiss, "last chance to stop, that kiss Sofia… that's the total and complete limit I can reach before loss of control sets in" she growled.

Sofia lifted her head until her lips lightly touched Sara's. "No limit, need you" she shaky breath out.

Sara considerately kept her weight balanced on her forearms, planted on either side of the blonde's shoulders as she kissed her forehead and cheeks, her breasts caressing Sofia's, her hips pinning hers. Sara's hands slid up to Sofia's and interweaved her fingers with hers. With a ruthless gentleness, she pinned the blonde's hands over her head, holding them there as she stared into her eyes. Sofia trembled when she saw the intensity in the brunette's eyes.

"From the first damn time I met you," Sara whispered in a husky possessive tone, "you drove me crazy, you were everything I wanted but swore I couldn't have."

The burn in her dark eyes grew even more intense, "seeing you again has only confirmed what I already knew, that you compliment me in ways no one has before." Sara bent her head and gave Sofia a gentle kiss, "give me half a chance to get under your skin and the other way around, and you might never get rid of me."

Sofia was certain her heart had skipped multiple beats listening to Sara's statement, and it made her want the brunette even more, she let her hands slip out of Sara's and wrapped them around her and pushed her head towards her own, "I know, Sara, and I want you just as much" she said before pressing their lips together.

Their legs mingled. Sara lightly nudged the blonde's legs further apart and pressed her own thigh against her sex. Sofia bent her right leg enough to let her thigh press against Sara's sex her right hand cupped the brunette's ass while the left one disappeared under her t-shirt and roamed lazy around her back.

Slowly the rhythms between them build. Sara let go of the mouth and kissed her way down Sofia's throat and onto the neck, Sofia tilted her head to the side and moaned loudly as she felt Sara's tongue slid along her pulse line.

Their lips met and again they got lost in wet deep desperate kisses that mingled together in raking teeth and sucking lips. Sara lifted herself a bit her fingers fumbled with Sofia's zipper; finally she yanked it open as the blonde gripped her hips and pressed her harder against her thigh.

Sara braced herself on her left lower arm; her right hand disappeared under Sofia's shirt and gently caressed her stomach before sliding lower following the waistband on her underwear.

"Your skin is so soft" Sara rumbled in a low voice.

"Sara, please" Sofia mumbled with a bleared voice.

As Sara let her fingers duck under the waistband her phone started ringing and instantly stopped all movement.

"Nooo!" Sara wailed out loud as she rolled off Sofia, "this is just not happening."

Sofia sighed loudly, "Think you better answer it, it might be something important."

Sara rolled onto her side and gently turned Sofia's face so she could look into her eyes, "you are important, that" she gestured towards the phone, "is just work."

Sofia's eyes widen at Sara's words and it almost made her wonder who the woman beside her was, not in a million years would she had believed hearing Sara put someone before work, but she had to admit she liked it.

"Like you too" she said as she kissed her softly, "now answer your phone."

Sara went over to the coffee table and picked her phone up, "Sidle speaking."

"Hey Butchy, Louisa here, are you at the lab?"

Sara put the phone on speaker so Sofia could hear the conversation as well, "hey Sweetheart" she chuckled, "nope, I finally managed to get this hot blonde into my motel room, so thanks for disturbing" Sara grinned into the receiver. Sofia just blushed and shook her head.

"Yeah right, Butchy" Louisa laughed, "but as you told earlier, work before pleasure! Regarding your case, we have looked it over and made a raw outline of what kind of guy you're looking for, but I don't know if it's such a good idea to fax it to the lab if you're not there."

"No probably not, hang on a sec, Louisa." Sara looked at Sofia, "do you lock your office off when you leave it?"

Sofia nodded, "yeah and I'm the only one that has a key not even the cleaning staff has one."

"Good" Sara smiled, "so it's okay for Louisa to fax the profile to your office?"

"Sure" Sofia gave Louisa the fax number.

"Got it" Louisa replied, "have to hang up, Sara, we are about to leave for Sin City" she chuckled, "but guess you are already there" she cocky added. "But let me know how your case turns out."

"So funny dear" Sara chuckled, "but I will, and again thanks for your help and have a safe trip."

"You're welcome and say hey to the hot blonde" Louisa laughed, "talk to you later, Butchy."

"Bye Louisa" Sara said, she closed the phone and placed it on the bedside table, before lying down next to Sofia.

Sofia placed herself atop of Sara and captured her lips in a brash, wet kiss, the probe of her tongue deep into the sweet warmth of Sara's mouth made them both moan into each other's mouth. Sara's hands slid around and cupped the blonde's ass, fingers wide and strong.

Sofia let go and sat up strangling Sara to the mattress and looked down at her, "guess we should go by the precinct and see what your friend has come up with."

Sara licked her lips, tasted Sofia on them. Her eyes roamed over Sofia's upper body close followed by her hands until she reached the top of her shirt, she grabbed the fabric and pulled Sofia down to her.

"Guess we should" she purred into Sofia's mouth.

Sara very slowly drew a circle on Sofia's shirt, feeling her back muscles flex under her touch, she traced another slow one, her other hand moved around the blondes hip brazenly.

Sofia gritted her teeth and groaned into the mattress as she felt Sara's lips nipping along her neck. Sara let her tongue gently stroke over Sofia's, moving in a slow wet tango that left the blondes entire body achy and sensitive.

Sara was only using her mouth and yet Sofia felt her thighs twitch with every kiss. Sara bent her legs to prevent Sofia from moving further down meanwhile her hand left the blondes hip and slowly slid into her still open pants and under the waistband of her panties.

Sara's fingers raked through the curls between Sofia's legs and stroked her intimately, with lewd and playful intent, in a slow dance; she lightly trailed her fingers along each fold, spreading the slickness, rubbing gently.

A moan escaped Sofia and her back arched in pleasure. Sara trailed the brush of her lips along the blonde's shoulder, her collarbone, up the ticklish length of her neck and took her mouth, hard. With leisurely intent, Sara used her index and ring finger to part the folds hidden deep at the bottom of her curls, opening the way and stroked the pink and glistening edges.

"Oh yes, this I how I want you," Sara breath with a voice thick of lust.

Sofia hips moved, rocked forward, she pushed her pussy against Sara's hand, "Sara, please" she groaned, her eyes hot with lust.

Sara's fingers slid up between the velvety folds in tender strokes, circling ever so lightly around the little button near the top, her other hand braced behind the small of the blondes back as she continued to stroke her.

Slowly she pressed the tip of her middle finger into Sofia, toying ever so lightly. Sofia pushed down, tried to move against her hand but Sara moved with her, keeping only the first digit in her sweet warmth.

Gently Sara pushed in a tiny bit deeper and was rewarded with a moan from Sofia; Sara pushed her middle finger deeper in a slow stroke then withdrew it. With deliberate intent she did it again, setting up an unhurried rhythm. Each stroke of her hand jolted her bud, and Sofia writhed happily, her breathing growing erratic as she pushed against the brunette.

"God, you're so wet" Sara growled in her ear.

"More, god, please, Sara harder" Sofia rambled.

Sara smiled; it certainly seemed like the good detective had forgotten how to speak. She let her hand move faster and added one more finger. Sofia felt the slow rise of goose bumps along her skin; she turned her face to Sara, her eyes half-closed, Sara kissed her and shifted her hand; she groaned with unexpected pleasure as the brunettes palm lightly pressed against the damp rosebud. Sara slid her thumb over Sofia's clit and her body began spasm hard and fast.

"Oooh yesss!" Sofia squealed. She stiffed and gripped Sara's moving fingers tightly.

Sara kept thrusting until Sofia slowly slumped against her; she slowly withdrew her hand and very deliberately licked her fingers then she found Sofia's mouth and kissed her until she gasped.

Sofia lifted herself a bit and looked into Sara eyes, "that wasn't exactly going to the precinct" she chuckled.

"No" Sara smiled, "guess I got deflected by something much better." She cupped Sofia's face, "are you okay?"

"No" Sofia answered as she bent down and captured Sara's lips, "need to return the favor before I'm total satisfied."

A deep growl was Sara's only respond to Sofia's words before she parted her lips and invited the blondes tongue inside. Just as Sofia let go of Sara's mouth her phone started ringing.

Sara shook her head and sighed, "Better answer it."

Sofia sat up and fished her phone out of her pocket, "detective Curtis speaking."

Even if Sara only could hear half of the conversation she instinctively knew it wasn't good news.

"Be there in half an hour" Sofia said before hanging up. She looked down at Sara, "there has been another assault and everything indicates it's the same guy," she said with a despairingly voice.

Sara pulled her down and into a hug, "Sofia, we will get him," she gently stroke the blondes back, "want me to come along?"

Sofia relaxed against Sara's body, "yeah I know we will" she sighed, "I just feel sad for those women and want him locked up before he hurts anyone else. So yes, I will like if you will come along, at least, then I'm sure it will be found if he has left anything behind."

Sara lifted Sofia's head and gave her a sweet kiss, "let's go then."

They got out of bed and soon after they left the room, Sofia headed towards the hospital, and Sara went to the crime scene.

When Sara arrived at the scene a young man was walking around in the living room taking pictures.

"Hallo, and who may you be?" Sara asked not recognizing the man, "and what are you doing here?"

"Hello, my name is Kent Jones and I work for the crime lab, and who may you be?"

"CSI Sara Sidle. I am the leading investigator on this case, and since I haven't seen you before I'll have to ask you to leave the scene."

"That's probably because I just have returned from vacation, and it's not like I have seen you before either and to the best of my knowledge Mr. Cox is still my supervisor and until he tells me otherwise I intent to stay" Kent replied.

Sara frowned and eyed the young man, "the way I see it this can go two ways, either you leave the scene right now or I will have one of the officers to remove you, your choice" she said with a stern voice.

"Bitch" Kent growled in a low voice as he walked towards Sara, "Look lady, I don't know who the hell you are, but no one tells me to leave" he retorted in a cold nonchalant tone.

Before Kent knew what had happened he was lying on the floor, face down, with his right arm restrained on his back and Sara's knee pressing against his back preventing him from moving, an officer came running into the room at Sara's call out.

"What the hell is going on in here?" The officer asked.

"This young man is refusing to leave the scene" Sara answered, "so maybe you could escort him outside and make sure he stays outside."

"Sure" the officer answered as he handcuffed the young man, "I'll place him in one of the squad cars for now" he said as he lead Kent out of the house.

Sara began processing the house, twenty minutes later Gregory, Amanda and Doug turned up to help. About an hour later Sofia showed up, she found Sara in the bedroom taking pictures, she went over to her and stood very close behind her.

"Hi you, heard you got pretty rough with one of the young guys" Sofia smirked.

A light shiver ran down Sara's spin as she felt Sofia's hot breath on her neck, "hi yourself. Hmm, perhaps a little but I did warn him first" she chuckled.

Sofia shortly let her hand rest on Sara's back, "think I need to hear a little more about that Butchy story something tells me there are a reason for that nickname" Sofia laughed in a low tone.

Sara briefly leaned back against Sofia and looked over her shoulder and wiggled her brows, "you think" She giggled mischievously, "well, I might tell you one day."

Sofia turned earnest, "according to the woman's statement everything screams the same guy, any luck in finding anything?"

"No" Sara sighed frustrated, "same mess but again without a trace of him." Sara looked around in the room, "he is really starting to piss me off. No one can commit a crime without leaving trace behind, somehow. And there are no way I'm letting him outsmart me, I know we have his 'fingerprint' somewhere in all of this, I just still need to figure out where its hidden."

Sofia gently squeezed her shoulder, "baby, no one outsmarts you, you are a great investigator and I'm sure you'll find the missing piece, just don't let him get to you, he's not worth it, okay?"

"I won't… 'Babe" Sara teasingly smirked.

Sofia took a step back and let her eyes roam over Sara, "num!" She sighed happy, "think I better get out of here. Are you coming by my office to look at your friend's material, when you're done here?"

Sara nodded before taking some more pictures, "yes, see you in a little while" she smiled.

**Tbc…**


	14. Chapter 14

_**Chapter 14 **_

Three hours later the little group was gathered in Sofia's office, each with a copy of the profile Louisa had sent.

"Seems like good old Narcissus strikes again" Sara mumbled.

Amanda looked confused at her, "huh?"

"Never heard of him?" Sara chuckled.

Amanda shook her head, "no don't think so. I know that a narcissist is a person who has an exaggerated feeling of self-esteem, based on the persons own self image or ego. The concept narcissism is often used as a pejorative to point out vanity, conceit, egoism or simple selfishness, which often makes a single individual feel superior in proportion to other people." Amanda smiled, "but I don't seem to recall ever hearing of Narcissus."

Sara gazed up from her papers to find that all of them were looking at her, she shrugged, "well, the story goes something like this: The term comes from the Greek mythology about legend Narcissus. Narcissus was a handsome young Greek man who rejected nymph Echos desperate overtures. As punishment he was doomed to fall in love with his own reflection in a puddle. When he was unable to complete his love, Narcissus faded away and became the flower named after him, narcissi.

Doug laughed a bit, "Sidle, sometimes I really think you are a walking encyclopedia."

Sofia snickered, "well Doug, if you had met her old supervisor, you would understand why."

Sara tilted her head and looked affectionate at Sofia, "no, Detective, not this time, as-a-matter-of-fact, I actually knows a lot more about Greek mythology than Grissom does."

Sara's intense look sent a warm jolt down Sofia's spine, "guess it shouldn't surprise me" she replied. She glanced down on the papers, "hmm, what else does it says!"

"They think he suffer of some kind of personality disorder like anti-social/dissocial or what earlier was described as antisocial personality disorder," Gregory added. "Typical characteristic of someone who suffers from antisocial personality disorder is; difficult to make sense of guilt. It is hard to live up to social obligations and to behave indifferent or callous towards other humans. He becomes easily frustrated, aggressive or violent. He has a tendency to blame others, and to excuse the negative consequences of his actions. He will do as he like here and now, without weighing the consequences in the longer term, and therefore the risk getting into crime or abuse of alcohol or drugs it quite high." Gregory read out loud.

"Ouch… PSAD, I really hope not" Doug groaned almost shrinking in his chair.

Sofia glimpsed over the pages, "Persistent Sexual Arousal or Genital Disorder" she read, "Is a rare condition which result in spontaneous and persistent physical sexual arousal with or without accompanying orgasm and swollen genitals, and not led by romantic feelings or sexual desire. It is mainly women who are affected by PSAD. Nymphomaniac, who goes by the name Nymphomania, for women, and satyromani is just the name of higher sexual needs of men. Satyromani is a rare mental disorder exists among men with higher sexual needs than the average man. Satyromaner have as nymphomaniac no sexual inhibitions and lack of true love feeling. The majority of rapists who attack random women, believed to be Satyromaner."

"Yeah, but it seems like they only see PSAD as a slim possibility but not really something he suffers from" Doug added.

Sara turned to the last page, "hmm, conclusion: Caucasian male between twenty-five and thirty-five. Severe trait of narcissism and antisocial personality disorder. He most likely has applied within several regions of law enforcement, fire-police departments, crime lab, etc. but been refused, physically he's in good shape it will be the mental tests he has failed in. Right now he has a job that according to his own self-esteem is inferior to he's abilities and he is determined to show it was a big mistake not accepting his application. He is not raping for sexual reasons, the women don't mean anything for him it's simply an effective means to get your attention and to mock you. He sees himself as being superior to you, he is sure he's smarter than you and can keep on raping without getting caught and there is no doubt that he will continue to rape to prove it. He is certain he has found such a perfect way to commit a crime that it cannot be solved, and by continuing to repeat it without getting caught, he confirms only that he is smarter than them trying to catch him." Sara grinded her teeth, "yeah well, a little newsflash, the perfect crime doesn't exist and I intent to prove that."

Doug sighed and rubbed his face, "yeah, don't mind locking him up and throw away the key."

Gregory look around, "it's almost 5 a.m. and none of us has barely slept so I suggest we get some sleep before anything else, lets meet back in the lab around noon" he said before saying goodnight and leaving the room. Amanda and Doug said goodnight and left the room together.

Sofia went over to Sara and pulled her up from the chair, "come on let's get out of here."

When they got outside Sara turned towards Sofia, "breakfast?"

"No, not unless you're hungry, all I want is to lie down" she gave her a wearily smile, "and preferably your bed."

Sara gave her a quick kiss, "see you at the motel" she smiled.

Soon after both were in Sara's room, they silently stripped down to their underwear's and crawled under the blanked and cuddled up in each other's arms.

Sofia sighed contented, "I really would like to satisfy you" she whispered, "but I think I'm too tired to do a very good job right now."

Sara lightly kissed her, "its okay Sof, I'm so tired that I don't think I would be able to enjoy it, anyway." And it didn't take long before both were sleeping.

Sara's bladder woke her up around 10 a.m. quietly she got out of bed and went to the bathroom, after emptying her bladder she went under the shower, Sofia had woke up when she returned to the room.

"Morning, slept well?" Sara smiled.

"Mmm, and morning to you" Sofia yawned, "been up long?"

Sara went over to the bed; "nope" she bent down and gave Sofia a light kiss, "want me to order breakfast?"

"No, coffee will be fine."

Sara went over to the little kitchenette, "is instant coffee okay?"

"Yeah, its fine" Sofia answered as she got out of bed and got dressed.

"You're welcome to take a shower if you want too" Sara said over her shoulder as she poured the boiled water into the Styrofoam cups.

Sofia came up behind her and slid her arms around her waist, "no I better go home and change clothes" she chuckled, "think people will start wonder if I turn up in the same clothes today."

Sara turned in her arms and kissed her, "yeah probably" she giggled.

Sofia sighed and leaned against Sara, "mmm, like being in your arms."

Sara softly kissed her neck, "likewise" she cooed.

They let go and brought the coffee with them over to the sofa and sat down.

"Are we still up for dinner tonight?" Sofia asked.

"Sure, unless something unexpected shows up."

Sofia leaned in and kissed her before getting up, "okay see you later then, better go home and shower" she smiled walking towards the door.

"Later Detective" Sara said.

Sara finished her coffee, put on her jacket and then she went back to the lab, since none of the others had arrived yet she just began work on the samples they had collected the night before.

Late in the afternoon the detective came by the lab, she had finally finished a list of suspects from the things they had learned from the profile.

"I have narrowed it down to five suspects" Sofia announced, "if we are to follow the profile slavish we can make it tree, but I think it would be wise to look further into all five of them." The detective placed five pieces of paper on the table. "We have a janitor, two from the cleaning staff, one that got sacked from the day shift, and one that turned in his resignation three weeks ago."

Gregory scratched his head, "think we can dismiss the last one, I don't think he will leave, he is getting to much pleasure out of following the investigation."

"Okay that leaves us with four" Amanda said, "but I don't see how it helps us; even if we get theirs DNA and fingerprint we still don't have anything to compare it to."

"No" Doug agreed "but by investigate them we might be able to exclude some of them and if we are lucky we will narrow it down to one suspect and then it will be up to the police to catch him in action."

Sara looked at Gregory, "can you check the one that got fired, if we are lucky he might have been working while some of the attacks were going on."

Gregory went over to the computer, "we can rule him out as well" he said after a few minutes, "he was working when twice of the rapes happened."

Doug chuckled and gave Amanda a shy smiled, "see, two out three to go."

Sara flicked through the pages of some of the earlier cases, she briefly glanced at Doug, "the greasy spot I swabbed outside…" she paused and took one of the other files, "I don't think it was blood" she continued, "do you have a result on that?" She asked finally looking up.

Doug went over to the computer and opened the file, "yeah its ordinary motor oil commonly it's only used at motor cycles," he looked questioningly at her.

Sara looked at the case file number, "go back to the previous case and compare the oil with the sample we found there."

Doug did as asked after a minute he turned towards the others, "it's the same oil" he confirmed.

A wryly smile was on Sara lips, she looked at Sofia, "your turn, can you find out if all three of them is driving a motor bike?"

Sofia took a seat in front of the computer, "Nope, only two of them does, one of the cleaning guys has astigmatism in his right eye which has prevented him for getting any kind of driving licenses. Hmm, and he doesn't seem to have an insurance registered on any kind of vehicles." She looked at them, "not our guy?"

Gregory shook his head, "I don't think so, he consider himself as being very clever so I doubt he'll jeopardize getting caught over a minor offences like driving without a license." He thought for a moment, "all of the rapes are committed in the suburbs which are a place where it's easy to be pulled over at nighttime, therefore it would be a big risk driving there without a license, and I don't think he's the type who has a driver."

"I have to agree with Gregory" Sara said, "but just to be sure and since the oil isn't a particular seldom one and it therefore could be random it's found at two different crime scenes, I think we need to rule out the buses and cabs." She gazed at Sofia, "do you mind crosschecking the bus routes and see if anyone has called a cab, hmm, I don't know, in a three or five bloke's radius from the crime scenes on the nights they were committed?"

"Sure, I'll start looking in to it right away," Sofia smiled.

Sara looked at Gregory and Amanda, "does any of you smoke?"

Both raised their brows, "Er, yeah I do" Gregory confirmed "why?"

"No one ever told you its unhealthy?" Sara laughed, "no, but you're only allowed to smoke outside so no one will think further about you walking around on the parking lot if you're smoking at the same time. That way, you can take a look at the bikes parked out there and see if one of them are leaking oil and maybe get a sample if no one's around."

Gregory wiggled his brows, "clever girl" he chuckled, "just knew smoking would come in handy one day."

"It wasn't an appeal to keep doing it" Sara grinned, she looked at Amanda, "you know the storeroom better than I do, so do you mind going down there and get the box with pictures, maybe we can find oil spots one some of the others to."

"Okay." Amanda was looking quite confused then she returned with the box and a transparent bag with a white protective suit inside.

"I think I maybe have overlooked a suit the day we went through them," she sighed contritely, "but I could have sworn there only was eleven that day, but now there's twelve. She looked apologetically at them, "I'm sorry, don't know how I could miss one."

Doug looked sympathetic at her, "its okay Amanda it's a mistake every one of us could have made."

Gregory fatherly pat her on the shoulder, "don't worry about it we'll just take a look at it now."

Sofia quickly shot a glance at Sara hoping she wasn't going to yell at the poor girl, but what she saw put her mind at ease. "Spill the beans, Sidle! I recognize that shit eating grin of yours every day, you just figured something out, didn't you?"

Sara couldn't help laughing at Sofia's words but she quickly turned earnest again, "well, mister 'I'm too smart for you,' you just messed up, big time," Sara stated to no one in particular.

She sent Amanda a smile, "you didn't make a mistake the suit wasn't there the last time you looked, but you just stumbled over the missing link."

They others just looked at Sara not even close to following her way of thinking. Sofia leaned back in her chair and watched Sara; she had always loved seeing the cute almost childish look Sara would get on her face whenever she was getting closer to solve a case.

Doug narrowed his eyes, "Sidle, think you need to explain this a little further, I still don't get it."

"Think I finally have figure out how he is doing it without leaving a trace…" she paused, "simply by leaving it right in front of us! He's counting on the last place we would ever look for evidence is right here in the lab and therefore it makes it the best place to hide it."

Sara looked at Amanda, "that day we were going through the suits the lab was filled with people so he never had a chance to put it back in the storeroom, that's why it wasn't there." She gazed at Doug, "he simply locks himself into the storeroom and takes a suit and puts it back in place when he is done with it."

A broad smile formed as she looked at the bag, "he has even marked the bag so he knows which one to take." She looked a Gregory, "I bet he knows whenever the suits has been used an which ones there will be safe not to get cleaned, and to erase he's own tracks he removes one of those and place the one he has been using and thus gets it cleaned for any trace of him."

She looked back at Amanda, "Doug has already checked the cleaning notes up until the previous assault, but I would like if you will check if any of the suits have been used and sent to cleaning after that."

Sara gestured towards the suit lying on the table, "and if not, then I'm willing to bet my whole career, that every trace we find on that suit belongs to our suspect."

For a long moment no one said anything, Gregory took off his glasses and scratched his eyes, "I think you're right, that would be a very smart way of doing it" he gave Sara an amused smile, "I will take my smoking or oil break now" he small laughed as he left the room.

Amanda looked at Doug, "care to help with the notes since you know which ones you have been looking at?"

"Sure" Doug nodded towards the door, "but let's use one of the big computers its much faster" he said walking out the door close followed by Amanda.

Sara walked over and stood close to Sofia, "seems like we finally are getting somewhere" she sighed.

Sofia took Sara's hand and their fingers automatic interweaved, "yeah, certainly hope you guys finds something one the suit that once and for all can lock that guy away," she looked pensive at the brunette, "do you really seriously believe that the perfect crime doesn't exists?"

Sara tilted her head and brooded, "Yes I actually do! Not that it means you can't get away with a crime; a lot of things can destroy the evidence and make it impossible for us to prove who did it, which happens every day, but fundamentally, no I don't think the perfect crime exist, you'll always leave something behind." Sara looked inquiringly at the detective, "you think differently?"

"For most people… No! But for a small handful, yourself included, who has the right scientific knowledge," Sofia tilted her head from side to side, "hmm then I actually think it could be possible." Sofia smutty gazed at Sara as she pulled her closer, "so Miss Sidle, tell me, are you planning on making the perfect crime?"

Sara leaned forward and found Sofia's ear, "to some narrow-minded people… definitely a crime, and you can be sure of I'm planning on making it… perfect" Sara smirked saucy, "even if it means I have to practice it over and over again… I might even be a slow learner here."

She placed a light kiss on Sofia's neck, "guess Detective, you could say I'm planning on making the perfect crime of passion… and I already know who my victim is going to be," she giggled as she pulled away.

Sofia swallowed hard and coughed slightly, "damn Sara, some kind of metaphor! Think I better go back to the precinct and look at buses and cabs while I still can think, work," she got up, "see you later, Sidle."

Sara quickly glanced at her watch, "Er, about dinner, I'm afraid it's going to be a very late one with this development."

Sofia looked at the watch on the wall, "yeah, but guess it applies for all of us. Hmm, why don't I just come back here when I'm done, and then we all can eat together here?"

"Sounds like an idea, see you later, Detective" Sara smiled as she began putting a pair of rubber gloves on.

Sofia arrived back a few hours later and after taking peoples order she left again to pick up dinner, Sara had finally finish examine the suit and was on her way to the storeroom with it then her phone started ringing.

"CSI Sidle speaking."

"Hi mom" Amy said with a feeble voice.

"Hi baby, you sound tired, is everything all right?" Sara asked concerned.

"Yeah" Amy sighed, "my stomach just hurts a bit."

"Hurts how, sweetie? Shall I come and bring you home?" Sara asked even more concerned.

"No" Amy quickly refused, "it's not that bad, think I maybe have eaten too much candy" she giggled.

"Hmm, promise you'll tell a teacher or call me if it's getting any worse."

"Promise" Amy said.

"So what else have you been up to today except eating too much candy?" Sara inquisitive asked.

"We have been on a treasure hunt" Amy told, "and my group found it and it was filled with candy."

"Oh" Sara chuckled, "guess that explain the sore stomach."

Amy laughed, "yeah, but we did share with the others even if we didn't had too."

"That was nice of you, Sunbeam, and probably a good thing for your stomach" Sara smiled.

"Mmm, well better hang up again, Adam want to call his mom too, talk to you tomorrow, bye mom."

"Bye baby, and say hey to Adam" Sara said before closing the phone.

When Sara came back from the storeroom they all went into the break room and waited for Sofia to show up with the food and it didn't take long before she returned with a big bag.

Sofia looked at Gregory, "a big Gordiats Baja and cinnamon twists for you, cheesy fiesta potatoes and a Crunchwrap supreme for you" she said to Doug, "a bacon ranch tortada and nachos for you" she said handing it to Amanda, "and to the no meat department" she chuckled and gazed at Sara, "Mexican rice and a crispy tortilla salad bowl" she sat down and picked out a small grilled chicken burrito and cinnamon twists for herself plus a big box of cheesy nachos for common share."

Sofia looked around, "let's eat while it's still warm. Oh" she continued, "don't think he has been using bus or cab, the buses barely drives those areas in the evening and there hasn't been any pick up by cabs that fits that description either."

Gregory took over, "I only found the janitors bike outside and there wasn't dripping any oil from it. He drives an Indian Chief Classic, and I mean a classic, his model is from the sixties but extremely well-preserved and I'm not so sure it drives on ordinary oil, so unless he has another bike then I don't think he's bike is the right one."

Sofia shook her head, "it doesn't I looked at one before I bought mine, but the fact that you only can get the special oil a few places in town did that I dismissed buying one and got a newer model instead. I can look it up when we're done eating, but I seriously doubt he drives another bike, people who prefer driving the old classics rarely drives the new models as well."

"As expected there hasn't been any suits sent to cleaning" Amanda continued.

"No, but that would also approximately be impossible" Doug added. "If the theory sticks, he must have been using a suit last night, so think the question is, is it the right suit we found?"

Sara nodded affirmative as she swallowed a mouthful of rice, "it's the right one, I managed to find a microscopic tearing in it, and it tested positive for dried up sweat, plus there were remains of semen's or more likely pre-sperm in the crotch plus a pubic hair in the zipper," she looked at Doug, "which you'll be working on when we're done eating."

"Slave driver" Doug muffled with a teasing voice.

"Crybaby" Sara chuckling shot back.

After eating Doug began working on the samples while Sofia checked how many vehicles the janitor owned, Gregory and Amanda looked over the janitor and the cleaning guys work schedule, and Sara went over the outdoors pictures from the different crime scenes to see if she could find any other oil spots. It was almost midnight before everyone once again was gathered in the small layout room they had made their base.

"I haven't found any other oil spots" Sara said, "The outdoor pictures aren't very good."

"It doesn't seem like the janitor owns any other kind of vehicles than the bike, so I looked up what the cleaning guy Aston Denver drivers" Sofia said, " he has an insurance policy on a Yamaha FZR 1000 from 2001which use ordinary oil."

"I have be going over the janitors work schedule and he was at work when at least two of the assaults happened" Amanda chipped in.

Gregory continued, "And I have been going over Mr. Denver's work schedule and he doesn't seem to have been working when any of the assaults happened."

"I'm running a DNA test on both the semen and the pubic hair but they won't be ready before later tonight and I couldn't get anything useful out of the sweat stains" Doug added.

Sofia smiled a bit, "guess that means we finally have one primary suspect," she looked at Gregory, "is he working now?"

"No, he's off until tomorrow morning" he replied, "and unless he is escalating I don't expect him to do anything tonight until now there have always been several days between the assaults."

"Yeah I was just thinking the same thing" Sofia said, "so why don't we call it a night and meet back here tomorrow at 8 a.m., the DNA tests should be ready by then. No need to warn him until we have something to compare him to."

All nodded in agreement, they went out on the parking lot together and said goodnight before everybody went to their cars. Sara was just about to put her car in reverse when a finger taped on the window; she opened it and smiled to Sofia.

"Didn't you forget something?" Sofia asked with a cocky voice.

Sara shortly brooded, "No I don't think so" she finally answered.

"I think you did" Sofia chuckled, she handed Sara a piece of paper before walking over to her own car.

**Tbc…**


	15. Chapter 15

_**Chapter 15**_

Sara smiled when she read the note, she went back to the motel and picked up some clean underwear a t-shirt and her toothbrush before driving to the address Sofia had written down on the paper, she knocked on the door and it didn't take long before Sofia opened it.

"Hi, come on in" Sofia smiled.

"Hi yourself" Sara answered as they walked into the living room; she glanced around, "nice place."

Sofia let her arms slid around the brunette's waist she opened her mouth to say thanks and suddenly found herself engulfed in a deep demanding kiss of such sweet intensity she could feel her toes curl deep in her boots.

"I'm warning you, Sidle" Sofia breath out as their lips parted, "keep kissing me like that and I won't be a good host, I will lead you directly to my bedroom without offering you anything to drink first."

Sara tried to calm her breathing down, tried to loosen the tension that was lodged between her shoulders and thighs, but it seemed impossible to do, she kissed her way up the blonde's neck to her ear and whispered, "I'm not thirsty."

Sofia tighten her embrace on Sara the soft merging of their auras thickened the lovely erotic tension between them as she walked them towards her bedroom, Sara ground her hips a little more firmly against Sofia's and was rewarded with a little hitch in her breath.

Sara laughed softly, overwhelmed, achingly aroused; her mouth met the blondes in a hot kiss their tongues circling eagerly as their hands began to shift. They reached the bedroom and before Sofia realized it Sara had her pinned against the inside of the door, her legs trapped between hers, Sara's body caging hers against the door in the dark room only lit up by the moonlight coming through the window.

Sara's mouth found the blondes, her hand slid with slow evil intent up the inside of her shirt, teasing her skin with velvety little patterns before slipping under her bra, her fingers circled the nearest pebbled nipple gently. Sara removed her hand and spun them around and towards the bed as they kissed, leaving Sofia dizzy in more ways than one.

Wildly, the blonde tried to hit the light switch near the door but missed as the brunette sucked happily on her bottom lip, distracting her in the most enchanting way, the bedroom was shadowy, and Sara liked the intimacy it made as she let her hands touch Sofia's face.

Sofia shivered in the dark as the brunettes grip around her tightened just enough to make her pulse race, to send a throb of heat between her legs, she let herself fall backwards onto the bed bringing Sara with her.

The moonlight spilling through the bedroom window added a surrealistic almost film noir touch; Sofia drank in the gorgeous image of Sara, her dark hair tangled around her face, her big dark eyes and pouting mouth tinted in shadows, Sofia arched a little, Sara gave her a beautiful grin and slid her hands behind her head, pulling her in for another kiss.

They broke the kiss, Sara pushed herself up and out of the bed, Sofia whimpered dissatisfied with the sudden lack of contact. Sara pulled Sofia's boots off, along with the thin dress socks, neatly storing them off to the side of the bed, she slide her hands up to the blonde's waist, finding the zipper of her dress slacks and slowly pulled it down.

Sofia shivered at Sara's light touch. The slacks slid to her bare feet with a whispering sound, neatly, Sara folded them and placed them on top of the boots. Sara pulled her own t-shirt and bra over her head and let it fall onto the floor; she kicked off her shoes before pulling the zipper in her jeans down.

Sofia sat up and unbuttoned the top buttons in her shirt before pulling it and her bra over her head and putting it aside. Sara let her jeans fall to the floor and stepped out of them before going back to the bed, she knelt down and rested on her knees between Sofia's legs and let her eyes roam over the blonde's body.

"Every inch of you is magnificent, Sofia. Long and lean, strong and sexy" Sara lightly nudged the blondes sleek thighs further apart before she lowered herself onto her.

A shiver ran through them and both moaned loudly as they felt each other's skin. Sara let one hand slid up to stroke her throat she shifted her hips in slow grinds as her hand cupped one of Sofia's breast. Sara pushed herself up resting on her lower legs but still hovering only a few inches above the blonde.

Sara let her touch shift; one hand lightly circled a hard nipple while the other snaked down Sofia's flat stomach in a slow caress, her slender fingers slid around her navel and into the hollow between her hips, watching as her nails teased the top edge of the blonde's panties. She slowly pulled them down; Sofia bent her legs and felt the soft fabric slid down her lower legs and off.

Sara opened the blonde's slim thighs wider, fingers sliding with eager intent towards the slick pink cleft blooming within the blonde curls there and caressed her with loving grace for a few long minutes. Sofia arched her neck, breathing fast as the brunettes touch glided deep between her legs in soft erotic strokes. Sofia cried out, a low wild sound of sheer pleasure as she rose up on the wave of hot hands slid up the insides of her damp thighs, dimly she felt the scratch of nails against the tender skin inside her thighs.

"Sara please… need… you" Sofia gasped.

Sara nodded and thrust two fingers into Sofia in one driving plunge, the sound of it deliciously wet and deep, slowly she withdrew and thrust again, Sofia tensed at Sara's intrusive strength the brunette began to build a hard rhythm as she kissed her face, licking at her open panting mouth.

Sofia felt her body surge, the tension growing with every deep stroke Sara pushed into her. She tightened her legs around her upper body and reached up, lacing her fingers behind her slender yet strong neck, feeling the sweat there along the back of it.

"Sara, baby oh God you feel so good in me…" Sofia cooed against Sara's mouth, thrilled when her words brought a deep groan from her.

"So hot and wet" Sara grunted, her long lashes brushing Sofia's cheek, as she thrust harder.

"Oh… fuck… yes" Sofia choked through the rush of pleasure curling tightly between her thighs as her orgasm rocked through her in long powerful waves. She finally gave a little sigh and Sara echoed it as she slowly lifted herself from the blondes embrace and smiling lay down beside her.

Sofia rolled onto her side and dipped her head and dropped her lips on the brunette with tender finesse, bestowing a kiss of graceful power. Sara let her mouth be lovingly plundered and by the time she broke away to breathe she had trouble remembering her name.

Sara drew in a warm deep breath full of her scent and smiled and made a purring noise deep in her throat. Sofia arched her back, pushing herself up off the bed. The bed creaked under the sudden change of weight, and Sara gasped as Sofia's hands slid ruthlessly over her body, pulling on her thong with furious haste.

"Off, now" Sofia growled as she let them slid down Sara's long legs before her mouth came down firmly on the brunettes.

Her tongue thrust between her parted lips, moving in as if it belonged there, and dizzy with lust, Sara sucked on it joyfully. She snaked her arms around Sofia, lost in the frenzy of heat and scent radiating off of her unabashedly and aroused. Sofia wetly broke off the kiss and drew in a shaky breath looking down at her, "god I want you so much."

Sara wriggled under her happily as Sofia dropped her mouth on a stiff dark nipple, sucking hard. Sara glance turned to the left, and the sudden, shocking sight of them in the moonlight wrapped around each other in the mirror sent another hot jolt of desire through her body. "Need you, Sof" she crooned, licking her ear.

Sofia shifted to the other breast as she settled between Sara's thighs, holding her body high enough for one hand to stroke along the juicy sanctuary there, she rocked two fingers forward in a powerful stroke, sinking deep.

Sara shuddered with the mind melting pleasure of the blondes thrust, of feeling the sweet burn of her lust deep in her. The brunette slide her hands down her strong back and lightly raked her nails over the soft flesh on her ass. Thrusting slowly, Sofia settled into a deep strong rhythm, making the bed creak under them as she took the brunette hard.

Sara angled her hips high, urging her deeper as she nipped her sweat-dampened throat and licked the hollows around the blondes collarbones, feeling wild and powerful. The taste of Sofia's sweat, her soft groans and grunts all fired her blood and she felt the jolts of tingling desire sharpen, focusing tightly between her thighs with every thrust. Sensing it, Sofia dropped her head, bristly wet cheek against hers as she increased the pace.

Sara clung to Sofia, nails raking her back through the sweat and along the muscles as her body shuddered. Nipples hard and aching, Sara gasped, cried out the blondes name as she let herself climax long and hard.

Sofia collapsed onto her Sara clung to her, and they both drifted off into the grey muzzy twilight for long moments, catching their breaths and marveling at the joy of the right place and time for this wordless soulful connection of body and spirit. Finally Sara drew in a deep sigh of utter satisfaction, and rolled her head only to catch sight of Sofia watching her, her expression inexplicably tender.

"You have no idea how many times I've lain awake dreaming of touching you like this" she said still a little out of breath, "hungering for you." Sofia continued softly, "I don't know how many times back in Vegas I watched you in the lab, you've got one of the cutest smirks I've ever seen, and sometimes when I watched you reading a crime scene, taking everything in with that intense gaze of yours I went dizzy inside. I wanted your hands on me with the same exquisite care you give to evidence."

She briefly paused, "even moving away didn't change that dream, memory can be a harsh mistress, the more I tried to forget things, the sharper focus they maintain."

"On some level I think I knew, felt the same way," Sara said. "You stirred me, challenged me, made me think, haunted my dreams, irritated and teased me. I adored your impulsiveness, your blunt manner, your careless tolerance of people who can't keep up with you; you are a street-wise swan, Sofia." Sara sighed, "I was just too stubborn or afraid to admitting it to myself, and when I finally did it was too late."

"No" Sofia whispered against her lips, "not too late."

Sara moaned into Sofia's mouth, her spine melting as her tongue slid over hers possessively. Soft wet flicks caressed her teeth, and after a second she let her tongue duel with hers, drinking in the taste of her. Sofia slid her hand from Sara's face down the sides of her neck.

"God I want you…" Sofia intoned, not moving as she stared at her.

"Not like I want you" Sara breathed, eyes dark and full as she rolled them around and pinned the blonde to the mattress.

Sara shifted her mouth to Sofia's and kissed her, sucking her bottom lip between her teeth as her fingers tips relentlessly moved along her side in wavy strokes. Sofia's breathing quickened as her hand blindly stroked the brunettes shoulder her other hand slid with possessive strength down her long spine.

Sara shifted, letting her knees slide alongside the blonde's hips, straddling her, she bent down and nipped on the hard nipple before sucking it into her mouth and flicked her tongue over and around it. Sara let go and kiss her way to the other nipple and gave it the same treatment before nipping her way down to the belly button.

She shifted her position again as she kissed her way further down her warm hands gently widen the blonde's thighs and stroked a hand over the silky curls between her thighs. Sara slid her fingers down and along the insides of Sofia's thighs and back up again, her fingers grew bolder, sliding up between the velvety folds in tender strokes, circling ever so lightly around the little button near the top.

Sofia wriggled and moved the slow tease of Sara's hand drove her crazy, and she practically whimpered when she began to nudge the underside of her bud with her thumb, stroking it with feather light touches.

Sara bent her face and licked the inside of her thigh, making the blonde quiver; she gently slid her fingers along the cleft and pushed it open a bit wider and lightly dropped a kiss on the soft fur of her mound, moaning happily, her tongue eagerly sliding along the slick cleft.

Gasping, Sofia stiffened, far more aroused than she realized. Sara's slow sensual licks along the slick pink of her inner thighs sent hard erotic surges through her entire frame. Each lap of her tongue enflamed her, each tickle of the brunettes soft breath made her shiver. Sofia's stomach tensed as Sara sucked in her soft folds between her lips, her growly moan vibrating against her skin.

Sofia wrapped her legs around Sara's ribs in a lover's grip as she pushed against her adoring mouth blindly, taking the pleasure on her stroking tongue, arching hard in a beautiful curve of sensual power that ignited in a glorious moment of wet fire. Sara caught her ass and held it steady as two of her fingers slid hard and deep inside the blonde and arrogantly stroked between her thighs while her tongue kept licking and teasing the clit.

Sofia moaned every nerve sweetly on fire now, she bit her lower lip, fighting herself not to come yet, but it was too late, and as Sara's strong fingers pumped deeply into the wet tight cleft she spasm. Arching her spine she let out a wild little moan while her body throbbed around the brunettes touch, clenching greedily, she rolled her hips up to meet her thrusts as the orgasm waved through her.

Sara kept thrusting and licking until Sofia slowly slumped onto the mattress, she gently removed her hand and crawled up and lay down beside Sofia and pulled her into her arms.

"God you're good at that" Sofia murmured, lightly rubbing her still hypersensitive skin against Sara's body.

"Well thank you" Sara breathed huskily into her ear, "glad you liked it since it's something I would like repeating on a regular basis."

Sofia shivered and pulled Sara on top of her and found her mouth in a deep demanding kiss, they slowly let go, Sofia gently pushed Sara up in a sitting position she softly cupped her breasts and let her thumbs harden the nipples. Sofia's fingers slid down Sara's stomach to toy through her silky curls, her fingers brushed the pearl deep between her thighs and the brunette shivered.

Sofia's finger slide down to Sara's opening but she didn't penetrate, she let her finger circle around the opening, caressing the sensitive skin there, softly she let her hands slid around to the back of the brunette's thighs, the blonde gently pushed urging her further up the bed.

With slow grace, Sara climbed up the mattress on her knees, the intensity of Sofia's gaze made her skin hot, made the fire in her belly flare up, she let her thighs open over Sofia's eyes. The blonde licked the sensitive skin at the top of her thigh, leaving the flesh wet from her mouth. She teased. Lightly she kissed the skin, circled around the centre of the brunette's sex.

"Sofia" Sara called breathlessly.

With a delicate flick, Sofia slid her hot tongue into her; Sara arched up, biting her lips in sheer delight. She lapped a few times and pulled back, she sucked her velvety folds; Sara gasped at the intensity of it, In reply, the blonde slid her hand up, moving restlessly over the curve of her ribs while trailing her limber tongue to the very edge of where skin met fur.

Sara squirmed; the unreality of the moment intensified and folded around her, the hot probe of the blonde's slick tongue teasing her, suckling and kissing, the lovely lewd sounds of wet flesh mingling with the low animal groans working out of her throat. Sara, desperately widen her thighs to give Sofia more access to the throbbing bud of her clit. Her fingers tightened around the bedpost.

Sofia lapped hard right up the middle of her slit, pausing at the top and sucked her clit into her mouth. The tip of her tongue worked it back and forth, while her bottom lip continued to skim over the delicate, wet flesh of her pussy.

"Yes. God." Sara grunted in time to the thrust of her hips, needing more than anything, Sofia to fill her.

Carefully Sofia began a steady rhythm, two slim fingers thrust deep inside the brunette, alternating the gentle suckling along the sweet inner folds as well as on the hard little pearl of her clit, the brunettes slickness was tangy and fueled on her desire to make her come on her lips.

Sara breath was coming in sweet, hot pants, more urgent and wild, the sound of a woman focused completely on pleasure and not giving a damn who heard it. Panting and sweaty, Sara's muscles tightened around Sofia's fingers in hard spasms before she collapsed down on the mattress beside Sofia. The blonde pulled her into her embrace and just hold her while her breathing calmed down.

"Sof" Sara muffled against Sofia's neck in a low sweet voice.

"Mmm" Sofia responded.

"Now I'm thirsty" Sara chuckled.

Sofia left the bed laughing and returned with a cold bottle of water after extinguishing their thirst they cuddled up in the middle of the bed and were soon after deep asleep.

It was almost 6:30 a.m. before they woke up again, after a little making out them went under the shower, together. Afterwards, if asked. None of them truthfully could had told, which had been hotter, the sex or the water. Sofia made them coffee to go since they were running late, breakfast simply had to wait.

At 8 a.m. they all except Amanda were gathered in the small layout room once again, after saying good morning they talked about how to tackle their knowledge the right way.

"The sperm sample came back unknown, Doug said, "But the pubic hair belongs to the latest victim so it's definitely the right suit."

Gregory pulled a sealed swab out of his pocket, "oil from a dripping Yamaha FZR 1000 standing outside" he grinned and handed it to Doug.

Amanda came into the room, "sorry I'm late but I spilled coffee on my way to work so had to go by the locker room to change" she explained, standing with a sealed swab in her hand.

Doug raised a brow and nodded towards the swab, "Er, and you decided to dry the coffee off with a swab" he laughed sweetly.

Amanda rolled her eyes and laughed lightly, "not quite. Our suspect was in the locker room cleaning when I arrived. Seems like he has caught a cold, he was standing coughing and spiting down the washbasin. He's thorough though, he cleaned the sink before leaving the room so I could change clothes, but apparently I distracted him enough so he didn't notice his saliva had hit the mirror as well." She shrugged, "so I swabbed it while I had the chance."

"Apology accepted" Sara chuckled. "Doug, begin working on it right away and make both a normal and a quick test, I know the fast isn't quite as accurate but it will be good enough for a start.

Doug rose and began working on the samples, the oil turned out to be the same. Around noon the first DNA test was ready, Doug printed the result out surrounded by the others, he looked at the paper and then he looked up, "and we got a match" he announced.

From there things went fast. Sofia called for reinforcement and forty-five minutes later Aston Denver was brought in to interrogation room one at the precinct. Sofia and Gregory went in to interview him while Doug, Amanda and Sara watched through the one way mirror.

Initially he had refused all knowledge of the matter, but as they had lain down the case for him combined with the profile he had finally made a full confession and told it was his revenge his way to show the lab it had been a big mistake not accepting his application. As the interview was coming to an end Sara's phone started ringing, she went out into the hallway and answered it.

"CSI Sara Sidle speaking."

"Hello Miss Sidle, Michael Skinner, Amy's English teacher speaking, sorry to disturbing you at work but your daughter isn't feeling well."

"What's wrong with her?" Sara asked anxious.

"We are not sure, she is complaining about stomach pains, we haven't taken her temperature but she feels warm, so we need to know if we should bring her to see a doctor or if you want to do it yourself."

"Depends on how fast she needs to see a doctor, I'm an hour away" Sara said.

"We suspect its some kind of a stomach virus infection since two other children also is complaining about a sore stomach, but again we're not doctors so it's your choice."

"I'll take her" Sara said, "please pack her things and I'll be there within an hour.

"Sure" Michael said, "See you in a little while."

Sara opened the door and looked at Doug, "can you pack my stuff and check out for me? I need to leave right away."

Doug looked worried at her as he walked into the hallway, "sure, is everything okay?"

"I don't know" she sighed. She pressed Amy's speed dial key as Gregory and Sofia came out from the interrogation room.

"Think that calls for a big celebration" Gregory said with a big smile looking at the others. Everyone nodded except Sara.

"Hi baby" Sara said into the receiver, "how are you doing?"

"Hi mom" Amy snuffled, "My stomach hurts."

"I know" Sara said comforting, "why didn't you call, sweetie?"

"I don't know" Amy shuddered, "it didn't feel so bad I wanted to disturb you at work."

"Sweetie, you're much more important than work so you can always call me no matter what."

Looking like a question mark was the perfect description of Sofia face as she stood watching and wondering what the hell was going on and who Sara was speaking with.

"Okay" Amy said with a weak voice. "Mom, can you come and pick me up I really want to go home."

Sara was already walking backwards towards the exit door, "of course, hang on a sec, baby" Sara gazed at the crowd in front of her, "sorry guys but you'll have to celebrate without me, I've to leave right away, but nice meting you, and hopefully I'll see you all again" she said sending Sofia a little smile before turning around and disappearing out the main door towards her car. "Sweetie, I'm leaving right now" Sara said sliding into the car.

"Are you still in Sacramento?" Amy asked.

"Yes I am Sunbeam, so give me an hour and I will be with you."

"Okay mom, better pack my things, see you soon."

"Yes you will" Sara said before closing the phone.

Speed limits weren't really on her mind as she pressed the accelerator and drove towards Lagoon Lake so forty-five minutes later she drove up in front the main building at the camp school.

A little girl pointed Sara in the right direction and soon after she walked into Amy's lodge and found her daughter sitting on her bed accompanied by Adam and Michael Skinner. Amy got up the second she saw Sara and went over to her; Sara bent down and lifted her up.

"Hi baby" Sara said as she planted a kiss on her forehead.

Amy leaned against her, "hi mom."

"God, you're burning up, sweetie" Sara said as she felt the heat radiating from Amy. She looked at Michael, "better get on our way I want a doctor to take a look at her right away."

"Understandably" Michael nodded; he walked them to the car caring Amy's suitcase, "please let us know if it's something contagious."

"I will" Sara promised as she placed Amy in the car, she got in herself and said goodbye.

Sara drove directly to the closest hospital when they reached Frisco and it didn't take long before they were called into an examination room and shortly after a doctor entered the room, after examine Amy and asking a lot of question he looked at Sara.

"She just has caught some kind of stomach virus which isn't that unheard of on camp school" he insured, "a lot of kids in the same place, and probably food that isn't cooked correctly, all the right things to give a bad stomach. Give her some aspirins and a lot of fluid and I'm sure she will be fine within the next twenty-four hours" he smiled.

"So it's not appendicitis or something like that?" Sara asked.

"No, she's not swollen or sore in that region, most likely she has gotten some bacterial in to her system probably from dirt on her hands after digging the treasure box up and subsequently eating some of the candy without washing her hands first, the time interval from eating to stomach pain fits perfectly." He looked from Amy to Sara, "but if she doesn't feel any better tomorrow I want to see her again." He gave Sara a pack of aspirins and looked at Amy, "I hope you'll feel better soon!"

Sara picked Amy up and said goodbye, when they got home she redressed Amy into pajamas, gave her an aspirin and put her to bed with some cold fruit syrup and water standing on the bedside table, she found a book and kept reading until Amy felt asleep.

She got up and found her phone and called the camp to let them know what the doctor had said. She went to the bathroom and filled the tub, got undressed and lowered herself into the hot water and forced herself to relax as the water washed away the tension from her body. As her muscles began to relax she really could feel how much the day's event emotionally had drained her, she closed her eyes and slowly dozed off.

**Tbc…**


	16. Chapter 16

_**Chapter 16**_

The cold water coming off of the tub caused her to wake up and get out of the bathtub; she wrapped a towel tight around herself and let it warm her skin before drying off and get dressed.

She stopped and checked on Amy before going to the kitchen, she meant to get coffee but the growl from her stomach and the fact that she still hadn't got anything to eat all day made her change her mind, instead she got something to eat.

Done eating she went into the living room and turn on the TV, while she was watching the news Amy woke up and called out for her, she got up and went into her room.

"Hi sweetie, are you feeling any better?" Sara asked, gingerly sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Mmm, a little my stomach doesn't hurt as much anymore."

Sara looked at the half empty glass, "do you want something cold to drink?"

"Yes please" Amy said vaguely, "can I get juice instead?"

"Sure you can" Sara said, reaching up to stroke her cheek, brushing a lock of hair away from her face with infinite tenderness, "I'll get it right away," she said softly as she stood up.

She went into the kitchen and filled a glass with cold juice as she was about to go back to Amy her cell phone began ringing she went over to the dinner table and answered it, "Sidle speaking."

"Hi Sara" Sofia said gingerly, "is everything okay? I got a bit concerned and confused about the way you left" she said hesitantly.

"Hi Sofia" Sara said suddenly feeling contritely, "yeah, sorry about that" she added hastily.

Sara briefly considered how to explain, staring at Amy's juice in her hand she realized there was no way of doing so without explaining what had happened, which meant, telling about her daughter. Eventually, Sofia had to learn about Amy, but now and over the phone wasn't really the way she'd intended to do it, she debated whether to carry on when Amy's call out reached her.

"I'm sorry Sofia but I can't talk right now" she said looking towards the girl's room.

Sofia tried to remain calm that wasn't a response she had expected, she knew Sara wasn't at work since she had tried to reach her there first. Even if she couldn't hear what had been said the light voice in the background hadn't ran undetected by. Sara apparently wasn't alone.

There could be any number of reasons why she wasn't alone but combined with her phone call earlier in the day… Giving herself a shake, she tried to push that thought down, but she was having a hard time not getting angry over Sara's lack of word or explanation.

Sofia sighed, frustrated, "Sara, what the hell is going on?" She paused trying to calm herself, and failed. "Not to insinuate anything, but you stormed out of here after a conversation I'm damn sure wasn't work related."

Her breath was coming in ragged, "call me suspicious and sorry for saying so but to me it sure as hell sounds like you are having someone else in your life" she hoped her voice didn't sound as desperate and angry as she felt.

Sara tensed when she realized how the whole thing must have seen from Sofia's perspective but everything had happened so fast she never thought about it. She sighed soundless not sure how to explain it without aggravate the situation, "there is" she ventured hesitantly, her voice a little cautiously, "but it's not what you…" she never got to finish the sentence before Sofia interrupted.

"Think…" she harshly exclaimed.

That wasn't the response Sofia had expected, feared yes, but never really truly believed, she swore silently when she realized her suspicion just had been confirmed.

"No it never is… is it?" Sofia almost bellowed. All the conflicting emotions she'd been struggling with coalesced into anger "so what? I was just some kind of diversion, a little fun while you were away from home?"

She fumed ruefully, "you know what? Don't even answer that! I really don't need to hear that that was all I was." Sofia sighed wryly, not trying to hide the venom in her voice, "whatever Sara, have a nice life… bye."

Sara somewhat wasn't surprised when the line went dead, she couldn't imagine how she would have reacted in Sofia's place. She fought to bring her breathing under control as she headed towards Amy's room with none of her normal energy.

She needed to stop thinking about the call. For now, Amy was her first priority! Her subconscious could mull over the problem until it reached a solution, if there was one, meanwhile she would distract her conscious with what it was good at: logic… and her daughter. A sad smile crossed her face as she gently brushed her fingers over the artwork covering the door before entering the room.

"Sorry about the waiting time, sweetie, had to answer the phone" Sara said contritely.

"It's okay" Amy softly smiled, taking a sip of the juice Sara had handed her, "who was it?"

"The detective I have been working with in Sacramento" Sara told "she wanted to hear if everything is fine since I left in a bit of a hurry" she chortled, despite the sadness she couldn't help feeling.

"Oh! That was nice of her. Are you going back to Sacramento to work on the case?" Amy asked expectantly.

"No" Sara slowly shook her head, "we got the suspect right before I left so that won't be necessary."

Amy tilted her head, "what about your friend?" She asked.

Sara raised a brow not sure about what Amy was trying to say, "what about her?" She asked a bit confused.

Amy lightly shrugged, "thought you might want to see her again. Even if I don't go to school with Jill and therefore don't see her everyday doesn't change that she is still my friend and I still want to see her whenever I can."

Sara tensed a bit not really sure what to say, "I know sweetie, but we live a bit further apart than you and Jill, and we both have a tight schedule so it's not that easy" she gave her a sweet smile and changed the subject. "Want me to read another chapter?"

Amy smiled and nodded as she cuddled up under the duvet. Sara took the book from the bedside table and placed herself beside the girl and began reading.

Sofia tossed her cell phone on the desk and buried her head in her hands her earlier anger muted to frustration. Every instinct she had screamed this was wrong, her shoulders dropped in resignation. She took a deep breath and let the ire sip out of her body.

Doug had never meant to be eavesdropping, he had come by to say bye before heading back to Frisco, when he had reached the detectives office door she had already been on the phone and with the door ajar it had been hard not to hear the conversation.

He knew something had developed between them, the intense looks, the tender smiles, not some big conspicuous signs, but still, enough for him to know. But from what he just had heard that could soon be over. He knew Sara was a very private person and it was obvious that she for some inexplicable reasons never had told Sofia about Amy.

He really liked Sara and wished nothing else for her than to be happy, but at the same time he didn't have a death wish, which meant he couldn't tell Sofia about the girl. Doug sighed deeply, wondering how he could tell Sofia that she had misunderstood Sara's phone call without betraying Sara's confidence.

He took a deep breath and waited a long minute before lightly knocking on the detective's door, "hey."

Sofia reluctantly waved him in, not really in a mood for talking, "hey, something I can help you with?" She asked sullen.

"No" Doug said gingerly, "just want to say goodbye before I'm heading back to Frisco."

"Oh" Sofia said soften her tone, well aware Doug wasn't to blame for her bad mood, "thanks for your help and hope you'll have a safe drive home" she smiled wearily.

"Thanks!" He regarded her carefully, licking his lips nervously, he cautiously continued, "I know it isn't any of my business, but if there is one thing I have learned, in our line of work… obvious answers are usually the wrong answers. And I think that goes just as much in general life as well."

He slowly headed for the door, casting a sidelong glance at her, "don't judge without knowing the truth." He smiled kindly, "nice meting you, Detective, hope I'll see you again" he said before disappearing out the door.

After leaving the precinct, Sofia returned home and for the first time it seemed empty. It was another feeling she was having trouble understanding since Sara only had been there once.

She had tried to process her earlier conversation with Sara, but found she didn't even know where to start. She got up and went to the bathroom, once she was safely behind the curtain; she folded her arms and rested them against the tiled wall, using her forearms as a pillow for her head.

Sofia's refusal to trust her own instincts gnawed at her. Sara was probably the most ethical person she knew. It meant you could trust her completely, whether professionally or personally, hell, she'd given more leeway to others in the past. Truthfully, she wouldn't nor couldn't believe Sara would lead her on if she already was involved with someone else. Nevertheless, Sara had admitted that there was someone else in her life.

By nature, Sofia was a scientist, a creature of logic.

_So what am I missing?_ _I know what I heard not to mention Sara's answer._

Sofia let her shoulders roll slightly as she straightened up focusing on the wall; she considered how to answer her own question.

She turned the water off and began drying off sighing wearily. The potent mix of emotions had taken their toll on her. She was still trying to process it all but knew that she needed to calm down emotionally for anything positive to come out of it. She put on a top and a pair of panties and went straight to bed.

Sara kept reading until Amy felt asleep again. Her stomach growling reluctantly got her up from the bed she went to the kitchen but since they hadn't been home for days there wasn't that much in the fridge so she settled for a couple of sandwiches and a bottle of water. As she placed her plate in the dishwasher a light knock was heard on the door, she straightened up and went to answer it.

"Hey" Doug smiled shyly, handing Sara her bag, "didn't know if there was anything in it you needed" he said.

"Thanks" Sara smiled back, "want to come in? You look like one who could use a cup of coffee."

"Sure, if I'm not disturbing" he said expectantly.

"No its fine" Sara assured, "Amy is sleeping and I was just about to make coffee anyway."

They went to the kitchen; Doug sat down while Sara got the coffeemaker started.

"How is she?" Doug asked concerned.

"Better than when I picked her up, the doctor think it's some kind of stomach virus, so she should be better in the morning, at least her fever has dropped a bit since we got home," Sara said relieved. She put coffee and cups on the table and sat down, "sorry for leaving you to finish up yourself. Did everything go all right?"

"Understandable" Doug smiled, "and both Gregory and Amanda helped packing and loading the equipment into the car before we went out celebrating," he chortled "and since I'll be going to Sacramento on a regular basis I can always drive by if I have forgotten something."

Sara smiled kindly, "you are really serious about her, aren't you?"

Doug shrugged, "yeah guess I am, she's sweet and it seems we have several things in common, not to mention, she understand the job and the things it involves." He looked pensive at Sara but didn't say anything.

Her brow puckered but she resisted the urge to sigh and gave him an indulgent look, "what's on your mind? There's obviously something you want to say, so why don't you just come out and say it" she said with a reassuring smile.

Doug shrugged, "because I don't have a death wish" he answered gingerly.

Sara continued to watch him indecisively as conflicting emotions of mild amusement and guilt washed over her. She had a pretty good idea to what was on his mind, she just wasn't sure she wanted to talk about how she might have set back or destroyed things between her and Sofia through her own folly.

"Go ahead. I'm in an amazingly non-violent mood today,"" she offered reassuringly.

Doug looked skeptical at her. Despite his misgivings he finally spoke up trying to keep his voice neutral, "everything okay?"

He could see she was debating whether to carry on with the discussion. He knew Sara was a private person. He didn't mind her privacy. It was part of what made Sara the woman she was, and he didn't want to push.

"What do you mean?" Sara asked cautiously, never big on talking about her personal life.

Doug sipped his coffee slowly, using it as a stalling tactic. "Maybe it's a guy thing when it comes to their girls" he gave Sara a sympathetic shrug, "but if I had a girl as sweet and bright as Amy I'm sure I would be bragging about her all the time."

He gave her a gentle smile, but his voice held a trace of nervousness mixed in with humor. He felt into silence, wondering how to progress.

Sara stared at him in astonishment Doug's word's definitely indicated he knew what was going on. After fidgeting for a moment, she turned to him with a nervous expression; she gave him a quick smile and let out a strangled little laugh, "and what makes you think I don't?"

Doug shortly looked distractedly around the kitchen before he gave her a friendly smile. "I realize it must have been an uncomfortable and unpleasantness experience to get a phone call like that about your child and I can easily understand why you couldn't get on your way fast enough" he said kindly.

"But it was also obviously that none of them had a clue about Amy or what was wrong" he shrugged, sipping his coffee slowly he turned slightly to give her a wry smile.

"Look Sara, I know you're a very private person, and really, I do respect that. I'm sure you have your own agenda for what and not you tell people which isn't any of my business, but, all things considered, the way you left… could have left something to be desired."

He ran his hand through his hair, wondering if he should tell Sara about how Sofia had reacted, he could only imagine how Sofia must have felt seeing Sara leave without any explanation. He carried on a silent debate with himself.

"I think it's pretty safe to say you left quite some confusion behind."

She looked at him and gave him a sad smile and let out a long sigh, "yeah, guess it wasn't the most elegant exit I made, but I wasn't thinking much about how it seemed at the time," she paused as another guilty look crossed her face.

Refusing to dwell on that subject Sara cocked her head in amusement, "but at least I got off the clear-out" she grinned mischievously. Her and Sofia's new relationship, if there still was one, was too nebulous and unsettled for her to talk about with Doug.

Doug took the hint and dropped the topic, after another cup of coffee he said goodnight and left.

Once Doug had left, Sara set her cup down on the table and rubbed her temples. She was still trying to come to terms with the revelations that came out of the conversation. And the realization she'd treated Sofia very unfairly.

She wasn't sure where she stood with Sofia, especially considering she wasn't sure where she stood with herself. Everything in her life was different.

Over the past several years, Sara had encountered many firsts. Getting a functional family, adopting Amy, buying a house, moving to dayshift…every step she took seemed like a new one. And as she sank deeper down onto the chair, Sara had to add another first onto the list, evaluating her life instead of just fleeting!

She found herself looking at life in a new way. She wasn't sure which way she wanted to go. Did she want to return to the relative safety of her life or did she want to experience something new?

With a flush of guilt, she decided not to worry about it right now. She was going to accept what had happened for what it was, a beautiful experience that she'd never forget. There would be time later to deal with the emotional ramifications.

Amy's voice calling out for her snapped her out of her thoughts; she got up and went to the girl's room.

"Hi sweetie how are you feeling?" Sara asked softly.

"Much better" Amy smiled bringing the glass to her mouth, "I'm actually a bit hungry," she said before taking a long sip.

"Okay" Sara smiled, "want me to bring you something or do you want to get out of bed for a little while?"

"Up" Amy chortled, "I don't want to have crumbs in my bed."

"Then put on slippers and your robe" Sara admonished, "we don't want you to get cold."

Amy did as asked and followed Sara into the kitchen where she sat down at the table.

"Think we better keep it light" Sara said, "What about some toast with butter?"

"No pancakes?" Amy asked playfully.

"No kiddo, no pancakes" Sara chuckled placing a plate in front of Amy with some toast on before sitting down with her own plate.

After eating half a toast Amy pushed her plate aside, "don't think I can eat any more."

Sara got up and cleaned the table, afterwards she turned to Amy, "bathroom time, someone needs to brush her teeth" she said, moving around the table to stand beside her.

"Think I'm too sick for that today" Amy quipped.

Sara looked amused at her, "nice try baby, but you're not that sick" she said with a slight headshake.

Amy rolled her eyes and sighed but followed Sara to the bathroom where both brushed their teeth, afterwards Amy turned to Sara, "can I sleep in your bed tonight?"

"Sure you can" Sara answered guiding Amy into her bedroom; she ruffled Amy's hair softly before scooting her up the bed. "Why don't you go back to sleep now?"

"Okay" Amy snickered, "will you read a story first, mom?"

"Sure" Sara answered, she pick up the book and got into bed, Amy cuddled up against her. She kept reading until Amy felt asleep, and it didn't take long before she felt asleep as well.

John had demanded that both Doug and Sara stayed home the whole weekend, so Sara and Amy enjoined the time playing board games, watching movies and reading, and since Amy didn't had any stomach pain Sunday Sara allowed her to go back to school Monday.

Sunday evening found Sofia sitting on her couch with a beer in hand. The weekend had been, if not hell… then close enough, and of course on top of that it had had to be her weekend off as well.

She had stayed as much as possible out of her abode, wandered through the crowd, a lone woman in the midst of families and couples, watching as children darted around her as though she were one of the trash cans or light poles.

A mistake? Maybe. Considering, she'd gotten used to seeing the brunette around, almost. Or at least it had felt like it. A glimpse here and there, a brunette head in a window, a long-legged dare-the-world stride down the other side of the street, but of course it wasn't her really, just someone similar enough to make her heart wince. It was never really her.

Sofia didn't know how many times she'd cursed herself for the mistake she'd made. It would be easy to blame it all on Sara, but the truth was that she couldn't. There was no point in asking how it had all gone wrong. She knew it, all too well. She'd let confusion and anger control her, but even worse, she'd never given the brunette a chance to answer. And now, she was paying the price, and would, she acknowledged to herself, for very probably the rest of her life.

Sofia flinched inwardly, thoughts came sluggishly, but they were still difficult to comprehend, and she couldn't help wondering if something irreplaceable had just walked out of her life.

**Tbc… **


	17. Chapter 17

_**Chapter 17**_

A familiar figure sitting sideways on a bike across the parking lot was the sight that met Sara when she left the lab Monday afternoon. One hand resting on the seat and the other hand holding a disposable coffee cup, Sara notice she was still wearing a leather outfit.

Sara felt her jaw loosen with a mixture of surprise and exasperation, though underneath it was a warmth she didn't cared to examine at the moment. Not that she was very successful. She stuck her hands in her pockets and walked across the broad, empty parking lot, watching Sofia watch her approach. Somehow her apparent calm soothed her a little, and she came to a halt in front of her.

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

Sofia tilted her head in the old familiar manner and gave her a nervously smile, pushing to her feet. "Hey, I'm invited by the sheriff along with representative from Santa Rosa, Stockton and San Jose, seems like the same gang is operating in all five cities so there is need for more co-operation between the cities" she shrugged, "so we are all meting to figure out how to work together."

For a while they stood side by side, Sara with her hands in her pockets and Sofia once again leaning against her bike, watching a couple of birds flying out over the water.

"Sara, can we talk?" Sofia asked at last, bringing the most painful issue out into the open in one flat-voiced sentence.

Sara's mouth quirked, a little sad, "I can't right now" her gaze turned from the far bay to meet hers, "I'm already running late as it is."

Sara turned around and unlocked the car door, opening it she slid into the driver's seat. Sofia defeated pushed herself off of the bike and started walking towards the main door only to be stopped by Sara's voice.

"Detective, get your ass back here" Sara called out in a soft but firm tone.

Sofia stopped, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sara give her a look slowly she turned and walked back, before she could analyze why she had called out, Sara went on.

"Why are you always walking away from me?" She asked.

Sofia's head spun a little, irritation mixed with pleasure, "I'm not" her sigh sounded defeated. "I just...I just assumed..."

Sara cut her off, "yes I have noticed that about you" she said gravely, "you are assuming a lot, but just once, I wish you'd let me answer before you ran away" the pain in her voice was clear.

Sofia didn't quite know what to say to that, "sorry" she said, a little breathlessly.

"You should be" Sara shot Sofia a dirty look. "I thought you said you want to talk."

She soften her voice as she took hold in Sofia's jacket pocket and pulled her closer, "I'll be home after 5 p.m., dinner is around 6 p.m." she said friendly, "text me if you can't make it or don't want to" she added.

Letting go of the jacket she hopped into her car, "otherwise, I'll see you late" she pointed out, slowly backing out of the parking space.

Sofia narrowed her eyes a little, "um Sara, where do you live?" She asked surprise.

"Some kind of detective you are" Sara chuckled dryly; "check your pocket" she grinned as she put the car in drive and rolled out of the parking lot.

For a while Sofa just stood, winding down, flexing her toes in her boots, she rolled her shoulders, working out the tension. She was still confused, meting Sara hadn't changed that, she relaxed somewhat at least Sara hadn't refused talking but everything was definitely a puzzle.

Sofia stared into space, trying to work her mind around it, considering different angles and possible paths of research, and finally gave up. She shook off the thought with some difficulty.

Sara pulled up in front of Amy's school as she got out she was greeted by her daughter.

"Hi mom, you're late" Amy said with a little smile.

"Hi sweetie, I know, sorry" Sara gazed around, "where is Adam?"

"His dad picked him up, they went to the music store to get Adam a new guitar. So why are you late?" she asked lightly.

Sara helped the girl into the car and made sure the seatbelt was buckled before getting in herself, as they began driving Sara caught Amy's eyes in the rear-view mirror. "I ran into my friend from Sacramento when I was leaving" Sara explained, "but since I didn't really had the time to talk with her I have invited her over for dinner" she said keeping her voice casual.

Amy gave a little nodding jerk of her head, "okay, does that mean we get dessert today?" She chortled.

Sara considered this for a moment, and bit the inside of her lip to suppress her smile, "hmm, that'll mean we have to go by the grocery store and I think we're too tired for that" she answered with a teasing voice.

Amy leaned forward a little and rolled her eyes, "I'm not too tired and we are driving by the grocery store anyway" she replied very persuasive, "and I'm sure…" she briefly paused, "Er, what's your friend's name?"

"Sofia" Sara grinned.

"And I'm sure Sofia would like to get dessert" Amy continued.

"You or Sofia?" Sara chuckled, parking in front of the store.

Amy shrugged as she climbed out of the car and shot her mother a mischievous grin, "how should I know I don't know your friend yet."

Sara ruffled her hair as they walked inside the store, "smart-ass" her voice was warm with humor.

After getting home they talked a bit about their day before Sara went into her room to change clothes, when she came back to the kitchen to start dinner, Amy was sitting at the table with her homework.

A few hours later she emerged in front of the Sidle house only to wince at the intense heat and humidity. She really didn't want to arrive drenched in sweat so she quickly zipped down her jacket after turning the bike off.

She curious looked at the gorgeous house in front of her before checking the address on the note one more time. She'd never taken Sara for being the house owner type, but then again, there were a lot of things she never connected Sara with. She got off the bike; nervousness swelled in the pit of her stomach as she walked the short distance to the front door.

Before Sara could say or do anything Amy was on her way to the door when they heard the knock. Sara took a deep breath, the fact that Amy walked towards the door seemed to be her cue to step deeper into kitchen.

In a way, it was tremendously freeing to have made her decision about inviting Sofia she just hadn't thought about how to introduce them, and now she just wonder how awkward this first meeting would be…

Sofia knocked on the door and within seconds it opened, revealing an young girl about six or seven years old, in many ways she looked like Sara, tall and lean with dark hair reaching her shoulders, much like Sofia would guess Sara look liked at that ages, except for her very deep blue eyes. Sofia stared at the girl, obviously surprised, she wasn't sure what to say, but Amy saved her the struggle of finding words.

"Hello" Amy said easily giving her one of her quirky small smiles. "Mom, Sofia is here" she yelled out.

"That's fine, Amy" Sara said as she came into the hallway, "but why don't you invite her in instead of just standing there yelling" she teased lightly.

Amy rolled her eyes and sighed a little, and leaned against Sara while she looked back at Sofia, "want to come in?" She asked politely.

"Yes please" Sofia answered with a smile, walking inside and closing the door.

"Hey Sofia, and welcome" Sara smiled nervously, "you can hang your jacket there" she said pointing at the coat rack.

Sofia looked at Sara, she had changed, she was dressed fairly casually, in a Berkeley sweatshirt and a pair of washout jeans; to Sofia's eyes she was adorable.

"Hey Sara, and thanks for inviting" she replied, taking her driving outfit off.

"Everything go okay?" Sara asked as they walked towards the kitchen.

Sofia briefly looked at Amy before answering, "Yeah fine."

It was weird, having Sofia in the family space, but in a good way. Sara knew Sofia was observing every detail as they went further into the house, and it made her look at the place with new eyes. Sofia looked around, admiring the architecture. Sara had found that her own obsessive tendencies towards scrubbing had slacked off when there were always stories to read or homework to help with… but the place still looked comfortably lived-in, with books and photos, and the occasional toy scattered around.

Sara led Sofia into the big kitchen, waving her to a stool. She pulled three bottles from the fridge, two beers and a soda and opened them, handing one each to her daughter and Sofia as Amy followed them in. An array of sliced vegetables waited on the counter, and Sara started scooping them into a large wok as Amy opened the oven door. The scent of broiling fish drifted out.

"10 minutes and dinner should be ready" Sara said, walking back to the gas stove.

"Dinner smells good," Sofia winked at Sara, "who would have thought, the woman who knew every carryout delivery boy in her section of Las Vegas by name actually can cook" she teased.

Sara looked up from the stir-fry. "Thanks," she picked up a bottle and added a squirt of something to the steaming wok, and tilted the wok a little over the flame.

"It's not like being by yourself inspire that much to cooking, but just because I didn't do it back then doesn't mean that I can't" she let out a long breath, then shrugged, a conceding gesture.

Sofia shrugged, looking slightly embarrassed, "No guess not, it's not like I cook myself, not really good at it" she gave Sara a wide smile.

Sara nodded, and picked up a spatula to stir the food. For a minute or so the kitchen was silent except for the hiss of the steam. Then she spoke again.

"Well, I never promised I'm good at it" she chuckled, "but you can judge for yourself in a little while." Sara turned the vegetables with the spatula, examining them, and then lowered the gas a little.

"If it tastes as good as it smell I'm not all that worried" Sofia replied softly.

"Adam says mom is a great cook" Amy entrusted Sofia, "and he eats here all the time."

Sara flushed a little, her eyes going shy, "yeah, but I think he likes all kind of food" she chortled.

"No not everything" Amy giggled, "he hates liver which they got Friday at camp" she told laughing, "so much that he wished we had take him home with us when you picked me up. He said that if he had known that in advance he would have faked stomach pain just like mine to get out of there."

"Poor kids" Sofia laughed, relieved to learn that Adam was one of Amy's classmates.

"Think I can understand that" Sara snickered, "well dinner is ready so please put your books aside Amy and go wash your hands, and afterwards you can lead Sofia out to the terrace" she turned to Sofia, "hope you don't mind eating outside."

Sofia flashed her a cute smile, "no fine by me."

Amy stuck her head in the kitchen door at that moment, "come on, Sofia, I'll show you where we are eating, and when we're done I'll show you my room" she said enthusiastically.

"Coming" Sofia chortled; she looked at Sara, "need any help?"

"If you don't mind then please take three bottles of water from the fridge, otherwise I'm fine," Sara said quietly.

"Okay," Sofia said, not commenting further, she smiled and took the water before following Amy.

Sara divided the salad into three small bowls, the vegetables and rice went into a serving bowl, she took the fish out of the oven but let it stay in the dish it was cooked in, she arranged the meal on a big tray and carried it outside to the others, both were nicely sitting at the table waiting.

Dinner was somewhat subdued but cozy, Amy did most of the talking, telling about school and music practice in between asking Sofia questions about what is was like being a detective.

Sofia especially enjoyed the banter mixed with serious talk between mother and daughter. No doubt Amy was above average intelligence and had an inquiring mind and Sara patiently answered every one of the girl's questions. For a woman who always had insisted she wasn't good with children, Sara was a natural.

When they were done eating Amy started stacking plates but Sara stopped her and told she could show Sofia her room while she cleared the table and made coffee.

Sara was loading the dishwasher when they came into the kitchen, she pointed at the items stacked on the kitchen counter and asked Amy to set the table but inside this time. Sofia helped Amy and since the coffee wasn't ready when they were done Amy asked if Sofia wanted to see the library.

Sofia raised a brow in amusement, "you have a library?"

Amy shrugged, "yeah, where else do you put your books!" Chuckling a little, Amy headed towards the room followed by Sofia.

Sofia was quite surprised when they walked into the room, she had expected there would be a few bookshelves and perhaps a couch, but looking around the room almost made her feel like she had walked into a mini library. "Whao, that's some kind of room you have here."

"Mmm" Amy agreed, "want to see the globe?"

"Sure" Sofia smiled.

Amy showed it with and without light in it and she pointed out Hawaii and told she had been on vacation there, she kept telling until Sara's voice called them back to the kitchen. When they both were seated Sara retrieved a decadent-looking chocolate creation from the refrigerator and placed it on the table before pouring coffee into the cups.

Sofia looked at Sara in disbelief, "don't tell me you made that yourself."

"Well, I could say no to oblige your wish" Sara eyed her sardonically, "but in this house we have this little rule about not lying, so I really can't do that" she chuckled.

"Sounds like a good rule" Sofia countered with a grin.

When they were done with dessert Sara looked at Amy, "are you done with your homework?"

"Mmm, that" she nodded towards the books lying at the end of the table "are just extra" she said.

They chatted for a little while longer before Sara exclaimed it was bathing time, Amy reluctantly got up and followed her mother to the bathroom. After showering and getting into pajamas Amy went back to the kitchen shortly followed by Sara, all three of them settled for a board game until it was time for Amy to go to bed. Sara tucked her in and read her a bedtime story before saying goodnight. Sofia was still sitting at the table when she got back to the kitchen.

Sara gave her a smile, "let's go into the living room think we have spent enough time on a kitchen stool as it is."

One corner of Sofia's mouth turned up in faint amusement, "I'd like that," she replied lightly.

After refilling their cups they went into the living room and sat down on the couch, an awkward little silence followed. The light outside the window was starting to dim a little when Sara got up to refill their mugs, slipping past Sofia with a murmur that wasn't quite words and returning with the pot and the cream and sugar.

"More coffee?" Sara's expression was pleasant but fairly neutral.

Sofia nodded, feeling both a pang of guilt and the relief of a three-days-old ache. "I'm sorry I jumped to the wrong conclusion," she choked out.

Sara shrugged, "And I should have explained it to you," she pointed out.

Taken aback, Sofia protested. "You didn't owe me…"

But Sara cut her off. "Yes, I did." Her eyes were dark and serious, and she turned to face her. "We both know I did."

Sofia squinted a little, her anger suddenly surfacing. "Then why didn't you?"

"Because I was an idiot," Sara looked down, a little shame showing. She sighed and folded her arms. "I never expected this, you know? I mean, I never figured we'd see each other again, and between work and… yeah you know what" she said evasive, "the right moment for telling about Amy just never occurred." Sara's expression was bleak. "I didn't even think about what it looked like before I got home."

Sofia let out a slow breath, calming slightly at the sight of the tension along Sara's jaw, the way her fingers tightened on the cup. She watched her carefully as she thought out her response, but before she could say anything Sara started talking again.

"But I don't think I'm entirely to blame here, it wasn't like you ever gave me a chance to explain" she said, trying to keep her voice calm.

A long sigh left Sofia, "I know" she said sadly, "I should have listened to you in the first place. I was worried and confused" she paused briefly, "I let my anger and hurt get the better of me" she offered gently.

Sara shrugged, "know the feeling" she told her, "think I have lost my temper more times than I care to remember."

Arms crossed over her chest protectively, she stared at her lap and bit her lip, feeling a pang of guilt, "look, done is done and it's not like neither of us can change it" she insisted, "All I can say is that I never intentional meant to hurt you" she said, looking sheepishly at Sofia.

"Me neither" she answered kindly. Scratching the top of her head absentmindedly, Sofia met Sara's eyes, "so where does it leave us?"

"I don't know" Sara replied honestly. "Maybe it'll be better if I put my social life in the pits for awhile."

Sofia sipped her coffee slowly, wondering how to respond, "So you are ready to throw it all overboard because of one mistake?" She asked evenly, "without giving us a chance to see where it might lead."

"You make it sound like I have a choice," Sara snorted. "I know that logically there isn't anything that prevents me to try. But emotionally, I'm not sure I can, Amy's welfare will always be my first priority. This isn't just about me and what I want, not anymore. Sof, I … my whole memory of what happened after I got that phone call, is fuzzy. I'm not sure what happened. I … all I could think about was Amy, nothing else mattered." She admitted bluntly.

"I'm afraid of, that I might goner hurt a potential partner again the next time something happens. Not the next time I'm getting a phone call, but the next time I'm stressed like that. What I will forget to do or say; what I will screw up. I don't want to ruin a relationship, or put it in jeopardy." After a few moments, she cleared her throat and continued, "And the best way of avoiding that is not being in a relationship."

For a little while Sofia leaned against the back rest and stared at the ceiling, trying to organize her feelings and thoughts, "guess I can understand you part of the way" her tone was friendly, but clearly indicated she wasn't buying her answer.

"But none of us know if there'll ever be a next time, and the better we get to know each other, the smaller that chance should be." She slowly turned her head and looked at Sara, "and in contrary to you I do believe you have a choice. The fact that you have a daughter shouldn't prevent you to get involved in a relationship. It's sensible you're reluctantly to let someone in to your live, considering it's not only you but as much your daughter that can end up getting hurt. But I'm not someone, Sara!"

Sofia pinched the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes for a moment, "Am I surprise to learn you have a daughter… yes. Does it complicate the opportunity to spend alone time with you… yes."

Sofia pressed her lips together and inhaled deeply through her nose. "Does it change the way I feel about you… No! Everything I said the last time we were together I meant, and I still do, not even a child can change that. I still want for you to be a part of my life… both of you, and I really would like a chance to be a part of yours life to."

Sofia turned a little on the couch and took Sara's hand, gently holding it, "Sara, you do have a choice, and you don't have to avoid anything unless you choose to do so." She gave her a penetrating stare then smiled slightly. "Give me a chance," she said intently.

Sara turned her head briefly, this was different. She wasn't used to being around a person who was perceptive, at least about her personal life.

Grissom had been nice, in his own two-timing, underhanded way, but he never thought to question any of her answers like Sofia just had done. Since the time they'd spent together in Sacramento she lost her desire to imagine life without her.

Despite her misgivings, she should at least make an effort, and it wasn't that she was unwilling to try, if that were true, she never would have invited Sofia to her home. But now she found herself worrying if Sofia could be content with someone who already had a child.

More importantly, she feared what it would do to her and Amy if they let her in, just to realize she wasn't. Sara decided to ignore that thought; she would just have to deal with that if it came to pass. Suddenly unsure how to continue, she simply just quoted a quote.

"_**The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward."**_ She turned to look back at Sofia and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Amelia Earhart" Sofia said with a soft smile. "Could you be a bit more specific?" she asked with an honest curiosity.

"I do want to spend time with you, and I know the only way to find out if we can make it work is to go ahead and try," she said gently.

Sara wary continued, "As friends. For now. Anything else, we'll have to take slow. Patience is required here."

She tried to figure out how to explain, "Everything I said to you in Sacramento, I meant, but I need for us to slow things down. I need to know every step of the way that we are doing the right thing. That the choices we are going to have to make are things we both want," she said carefully.

"I'll be lying if I say I am not afraid of letting you in. I am. The one thing that really scares me the most is that one day you're going to realize that this has all been too much and you'll decide we're not worth the effort, and leave."

A smile crossed Sara's face as she watched Sofia gentle look. "I know there are no guarantees no matter how we do this, I just don't want to ruining anything by rushing into it," her voice held a trace of nervousness when she asked, "does any of this make sense?"

Sofia intertwined their fingers and smiled, "it makes perfect sense" she answered, "and I don't mind taking it slow, I want this to work, Sara. We can start back at the beginning, if it'll make you feel better. I know some things happened rather fast the last time we were together. But it wasn't like I planned on us becoming intimately involved that soon."

She licked her lips nervously, "but for now and until we figure this out, there doesn't have to be anything… physical between us," she said honestly. "So what do you say, think we can make it work?"

Sara cocked her head, as if considering the answer. "I'd say the earlier indications were promising. But you know, we really should repeat the experiment to verify the results."

"Just the answer I hope for" Sofia said happily.

For a while none of them spoke, both feeling a bit emotionally drained on top of their long talk, and when they did start talking again they kept the subjects on a light everyday basis.

"So how did your meting go?"

"Fine actually, your sheriff seems like a nice guy, and the representatives from the other cities were friendly and liked the idea about working together" Sofia said with a smile.

"Haven't really met him that many times, but yeah he seems nice" she said with an amused smile, "so how is this co-operation going to work?"

"Well, every department will keep surveillance of the gang in their own city and then we will met up her in Frisco once a week to compare notes on their activity, and to decide what our next move will be" Sofia explained, "so I'll be back in town on Wednesday" she chortled.

"We should be home after 4 p.m. and dinner is around six, unless you have made other plans."

"I haven't, so if you are inviting I'll be happy to come by" Sofia answered, "but tell me, where have you learned to cook like that Ms. Carryout? And don't say through books, no one gets that good to cook just by reading about it" Sofia laughed gently. That was a side of Sara she never expected to exist.

The brunette gave her a dirty look. "Sof, my parents ran a very successful bed-and-breakfast. From the time I was big enough to stir a pot, I spent every weekend growing up cooking for a bunch of strangers. I can cook. I just hated to do it. It was always a chore, not something I wanted to do, even less when I lived by myself," she said.

Sofia leaned a little forward and caught Sara's eyes, "despite you hated it I can promise you it turned out good you really are a great cook, so thank you for a very lovely meal."

"You're welcome" Sara said a little shy, "but don't expect dessert every time you eat here, normally we only get that in the weekends" she said evenly. She giggled a bit and looked at Sofia, "but there is still some dessert back in the fridges if you're hungry."

"Thanks, but as tempting as it sounds I think I better start getting homeward, it's getting late and we both have work tomorrow," she released her hand from Sara's and got up.

Sara got up as well and walked her to the hall and watched Sofia getting dressed. For a moment they just stood and looked unsure at each other not sure about what to do until Sara pulled the blonde into a short hug.

"Drive safely and see you Wednesday" Sara said releasing Sofia.

"I will and we will" Sofia chuckled as she walked out the door towards her bike.

Sara kept standing in doorway until Sofia rolled out of the driveway and disappeared; afterwards she cleaned the coffee table and checked Amy before going to bed.

**Tbc…**


	18. Chapter 18

_**Chapter 18**_

The Sidle house was full of activity when Sofia arrived late Wednesday afternoon, Amy and Adam was practicing on their music instruments and Sara was outside planting some flowers.

"Hi" Sofia said followed by a smile, "looking nice" she continued pointing at the flowerbed.

"Hi" Sara answered as she got up, "thanks. Thirsty? There's lemonade on the terrace."

"Yes please as soon as I got my dress off."

They went inside and while Sofia got out of her dress Sara went washing her hands, both were soon after seated on the terrace with a glass of lemonade talking about their work day. They stayed outside until it was time for Sara to start making dinner.

It didn't take long before various aromas was filling the kitchen area, Sofia watched as Sara quickly slicing various fruits into a large bowl, subsequently the knife expertly flew around the cutting board chopping vegetables, pasta was already boiling, however Sofia looked somewhat surprised when Sara pulled a pack of steaks out of the fridges.

"Mom" Amy said as her and Adam entered the kitchen, "oh, hi Sofia, this is my friend Adam. Mom, what are we having for dinner?"

"Hi Amy and hello Adam nice to meet you" Sofia answered.

"Hello" Adam snickered.

"Pasta with grilled vegetables, steaks, bread and fruit salad" Sara smiled, "are you two done practicing?"

"Yep" Both confirmed, "mom, can Adam stay for dinner?"

"Sure, if it's okay with his parents. Have you called and asked, Adam?"

"Yep, dad said it was okay, but he wants me home at 7:30 p.m., at the latest" Adam replied. "Are you the police woman?" He asked shyly, looking at Sofia.

"Yes I am" Sofia acknowledged, "I work as a detective in Sacramento."

"What about dessert?" Amy asked with a mischievously voice.

Sara raised a brow melodramatically, eyes twinkling, "nice try, Sunbeam, but you know the rules about dessert, and I have already informed Sofia that if she wants dessert she'll have to show up in the weekends, so no dessert."

Amy rolled her eyes, "think we need to work on that rule" she said, nodding enthusiastically.

Both Sara and Sofia began laughing, "think you better work on setting the table" Sara retorted.

Adam and Amy set the table and it didn't take long before all four was seated and eating.

"You really are an excellent cook, Sara" Sofia said appreciative, "but I wouldn't have guessed a vegetarian served meat" she teased.

Sara's face wrinkled up in amusement, "well, life is full of surprises." She smirked at her last statement, but answered her. "Beside I never gave up meat out of a higher conviction, I did it because I found it gross, so I don't see why others shouldn't enjoy it."

Sara gave Sofia her trademark grin, with a hint of mischief, "furthermore, studies shows that there are lot of things in meat that especially children's growing body depend on" she shrugged, "so yeah I cook meat even if I don't eat it myself."

They lingered over dinner, since it was early; Sofia who wasn't use to share a meal with two kids found that it was…fun. Adam to some level shared Amy's sharp mind, and Sara, her mind was as sharp as ever; so the debates flew thick and fast, on a children's level.

Afterwards, and because the kids already had done their homework they somehow ended up playing a game of Scrabble, with a dictionary to hand. The kids gave a respectable showing themselves, but in the end it came down to the two grownups and their voracious memories. Sofia and Sara managed a tie.

As they packed up the Scrabble set, Sofia couldn't remember the last time she'd played a game for fun; her college days of poker for funding hardly counted, although they had been interesting. And as she watched Sara put the game away into the coat closet, she realized that though she was still intent on wooing Sara, a quiet friendly time as this could easily become almost as important to her.

After looking at her watch Sara asked Adam to go pack his things and since it was a mild evening they decided to walk as long as Sara promised to carry Adam's guitar. When they got home Amy went to her room to pack her school bag before getting her shower, subsequently they watched TV until it was Amy's bedtime, as usually Sara read her a night story before tucking her in.

Coffee and mugs were standing on the coffee table in the living room when Sara returned, she went over and sank down on the couch beside Sofia and poured herself a cup.

"What are you thinking about?" Sara asked in a low tone.

Sofia squinted a little, a smile suddenly surfacing, "about how high the IQ number is in this house" she smirked, "Amy is definitely very smart for her ages, um, not that I know how old she is."

"She's six, turning seven next month, and yes she is very smart" Sara chuckled, "but I don't think you have anything to worry about just yet," she shrugged, "and if she is getting to smart then I guess we just have to team up." She gave Sofia an affectionate smile, "you're quite bright yourself so I think you'll fit in just fine."

"Thanks" Sofia smiled, taking the brunette's hand, "can I ask you a question?"

Sara intertwined their fingers, "you just did" she teased, "but yeah you can ask."

"Guess I'm just wondering how you ended up adopting Amy," feeling Sara tense she gave her hand a little squeeze, "I still remember how you used to say that you never was going to have children, that you wasn't good with them, which I from own observation can tell you isn't truth, you are very good with children."

Sara half-shrugged, "it's a long story, guess you could blame it on my mother" she said softly.

"When I got back from the jungle" she snickered, "and began teaching at Berkeley, my mother suggested that I volunteered teaching at a foster home she was co-operation with."

Sara made herself finish her coffee, drinking it slowly as she leaned against the back rest and stared at their hands. Sofia just watched her without saying anything; she just waited for Sara to continue.

"Amy wasn't even supposed to be a part of the study group since she hadn't started school yet, but she really wanted to learn and since the home couldn't afford sending her to school I thought it was the least I could do. Eventually I became her Tutor through an adult/child program run by the home. It was suppose to be a couple of days a week, but it didn't take long before I spend more or less all my spare time with her, she seemed to like hanging out with me and much to my own surprise I enjoyed her company."

Sara chuckled a bit, "my mom almost gave me a heart attack by suggesting I should adopt her, I simply thought she'd gone crazy, but looking back I guess it did make me start thinking. Around Christmas everything just escaladed, we weren't supposed to spend Christmas together but ended up doing so anyway."

Her expression smoothed out and one corner of her mouth turned up in a grin, "remember how people always used to warn me that one day my temper would get me into trouble" she more stated than asked, "well, I won't say it got me into troubles but it definitely got me into acting and signing up for adoption, she moved in with me the next day and six months later the approval went through."

Sara stopped talking to pour herself some more coffee, "until now everything have been going fine, she seems to thrives, but I would be lying if I said that I didn't still wonder from time to time if I did the right thing, if I will be capable of giving her the right guidance and help as she grows up."

Sara looked thoughtful for a moment, "but despite all my doubts, given the opportunity to rewinding time I would do it again, I don't think I can begin to describe all the happiness Amy have brought into my life."

Sofia looked fondly at her, "you don't have to its evident in your face."

Sara regarded her for a few seconds longer, and then grinned widely as Sofia said nothing more, "what about you, ever thought about getting kids yourself?"

She frowned a little, and extracted her hand from her grip, her hands flexed nervously, knowing what a no easily could mean, some part of her quailed at that thought. It was a bittersweet realization, but Sara focused on the positive. "She's still here." She scrubbed her hands over her face, and lowered them to give the blonde an appealing look.

Without speaking, Sofia once again took Sara's hand and waited for her to relax, it was pretty easy to guess what was going through the brunette's mind.

"I like kids and have always thought that eventually I would have some of my own. But not on my own! Even if it's slim, being a detective do involves the possibility of getting hurt in the line of duty, so I have never dared doing it on my own, but I have always known that if I ever meet the right one, a child would definitely be an upcoming subject."

Sara slowly exhaled listening to Sofia's statement. She looked amused at her, "you know, if this works out, we goner be one of those couples that does everything in reverse order" she laughed.

Sofia just looked at her, and laughed content. "Guess I should be going homeward" she smiled, "you have work tomorrow."

"You're off tomorrow?" Sofia nodded. "Me too, I'm working this weekend" Sara said.

"So am I" Sofia replied. "So made any plans for tomorrow?"

Sara leaned back on the couch, "nope not really, have you?"

"Nope" Sofia answered, her eyes wanton following Sara's lean body stretching out in front of her, still remembering the taste of her, the soft fit of her mouth against hers. Sofia shook off the thought with some difficulty. Teasing herself like that was not a good idea when it was important for her to exercise patience.

"Want to hang out?" She let the corner of her mouth turn up.

"Love too" Sara smiled. She bit her lip, "look, I know we agreed on taking it slow but if we are to spend tomorrow together, then I think it's ridiculous for you to drive home tonight just to return tomorrow."

Sara hesitated, trying to muster another argument, "we do have a guest room you can borrow," she measured Sofia, "and we are not more far apart in size, than I can find some sleeping clothes, a t-shirt and some underwear you can fit into, and I'm sure I have a spare toothbrush to" she said giving her an encouraging look.

"Well, it isn't quite my idea of sleeping with you" Sofia chuckled teasingly, "but yeah, it will save me a lot of driving, so I will love to borrow your guest room."

Sofia sank down on the couch opposite Sara, and let her legs tangle with the brunette's, she didn't bother with all the logical arguments about them perhaps being 'to' friendly, she just smiled, satisfied for the moment.

Thursday morning was as normal as mornings ever got around the Sidle house, Sara was getting coffee, toast and fruit salad, Amy went for cereals, everything was as it used to be until Sofia walked into the kitchen.

"Morning" Sofia smiled sleepy.

"Morning" Sara smiled back, "there's fresh coffee and toast if you like."

Sofia nodded and poured herself some coffee before sitting down.

"Morning" Amy mumbled before looking at her mother, "Why can you have a sleepover on a school night if I can't?" She groused.

Sofia only managed a low giggle at that question, the caffeine apparently having little effect as yet.

"We didn't have a sleepover sweetie; I let Sofia borrow the guest room because she has a long way home." Sara thought for a moment, "What's the distance between here and Sacramento?"

Amy ran to her room and returned with her backpack and pulled out her phone, "80 miles" she answered shortly after.

"Multiply with 2" Sara continued.

"160" Amy answered without thinking.

"Yes" Sara nodded confirming, tousling Amy's hair.

"This is the number of miles Sofia would have had to drive just to sleep if she hadn't borrowed our guest room." Sara smiled sweetly at Amy, "it wasn't like we stayed up half the night to play or build a lair or any of those things you guys do when you have a sleepover, she slept here so she didn't had to drive a lot of unnecessary miles" she explained.

"Hmm, guess it make senses" Amy said after a moment of thinking, "so if it's more comfortable my friends can sleep here on a school night?"

"Of course they can" Sara offered, "but they'll be sleeping in the guest room and there won't be any playing in your room during the night" she said blankly.

"Hmm, okay" Amy said, "not that it sounds like fun."

"No probably not" Sara chuckled, "but Sofia didn't sleep here for fun but because it was more convenient." Sara looked questioning at her, "so you're cool with Sofia borrowing the guest room? She might like to borrow it again since she'll be working here in Frisco from time to time."

Amy shrugged, "Yep!" She agreed, chasing a last cornflake with her spoon. "But if you build a lair in your room and have a sleepover I want to be invited."

"That's a deal" Sara answered laughing. She took another gulp of coffee and glanced at her watch.

Amy slid down from the stool and tucked the phone into her backpack before taking her glass to the sink. "Gotta brush my teeth."

Sara got up and followed her, she smiled at Sofia when they came back, "make yourself comfortable, I just goner drive her to school."

"Bye Sofia" Amy waved as she walked towards the front door.

"Bye kiddo, have a nice day" Sofia waved back.

Sofia had showered and redressed by the time Sara came back and was again sitting at the table drinking coffee. Sara went to the kitchen counter with a small paper bag with two muffins inside; she absently reached for plates, setting one muffin on each she went back to the table and slid one towards Sofia.

"For you my dear" Sara chortled amused.

"Thanks." Sofia picked hers up and started peeling off the paper, "but you didn't had to, toast would have been fine" she smiled.

Sara snorted at that, and began pulling her muffin apart, "What would you like to do today?" She asked softly, she looked up again to see the blonde crumbling a bit of muffin in her fingers, watching her.

Sofia smiled a little, "I don't know… is there anything you'd like to see? This is Frisco… the choices are dizzying."

"Yeah, they are." She smiled back. "However, if you don't have a preference… I would like to go by the greenhouses for inspiration. I still don't know how I want my own garden." Sara narrowed her eyes at her, "if you don't think that'll be to borrowing."

Sofia chuckled and stood, "no that's fine" she said placing her things in the dishwasher.

They walked through the tiny atrium and the double doors, and Sara couldn't help grinning as she watched Sofia's face. She stared up into the humid, glass-ceilinged space, a wide smile spreading across her lips.

The greenhouse was filled with all kinds of nectar-bearing plants, and everywhere… in the air, on the blossoms, occasionally on the visitors… were butterflies. The botanical gardens' exhibit had caught Sara's eye when she had surfed for possible activities earlier in the week, and she was glad she'd put it on her list.

They wandered slowly around the greenhouse, breathing the moist air, and both stopped every couple of feet to admire a new set of wings, it had taken Sofia a few minutes to get over the creeps when some of the butterflies decided to try her out as a landing site, but eventually she accepted the idea, letting them pause on her arm or shoulder and gently waving them away from her face.

Sofia was a little surprised by the fact that she didn't get bored. But between the mingled scents, and all the flowers and butterflies to look at…and Sara to watch…she wasn't. Her hungry heart, ignoring her cautions, took every opportunity to observe Sara as she moved from plant to plant, and noting that the humidity was making her hair even curlier.

They ended up wandering deeper into the outdoor gardens afterwards, enjoying the morning. The flowerbeds were bright with summer and the vista was beautiful; gentle swells of grass, small ornamental trees, a meandering human-made lake let, and bigger wild trees ringing the park at a distance.

They walked without speaking or hurrying, along wide stone-paved paths, passing through the fragrance garden and ending up on the Japanese gazebo that perched over the lake let's still waters. There were few other people around, but all of them were at a distance, tending plants or pushing strollers. For a while they stood side by side, Sara with her hands in her pockets and Sofia leaning her arms on the rail, watching a couple of wood ducks floating out on the water and spotting the occasional orange gleam of a lurking koi.

"Getting bored yet?" Sara asked with a smile.

"No surprisingly not" Sofia answered honestly.

Sara snickered a little over the answer, "what do you usually spend your spare time with? Any leisure-time activity?" She asked curiously.

"I like reading, and I used to go hiking with a colleague until he moved back to Washington, and for the last couple of years I have been running self-defense courses during the winter months."

She thought for a moment, "I often go for a run or swimming after work just to get the work day out of my body. But except for that I guess it's just hanging out with friends or visit the family when I can find the time." She leaned back a little, amused, "maybe we can go hiking some time I seem to remember you liked doing that when you lived in Vegas."

"Yeah I did" she answered, before falling into silent for a brief moment. "Sof, how do you feel about this?" Their eyes met briefly, and then she gave her a smile before continuing, "I mean, I know this wasn't quite what you had hoped for so I won't blame you if you do decide this is too hard and want to get out."

Letting out a wistful sigh, Sofia smiled weakly at the friendly concern, after a few moments, she cleared her throat, "no guess it isn't" she agreed, "but I can't really question your reasons for wanting to take it slow" she said quietly.

The Sara she had 'left' in Las Vegas three years before was not the Sara she'd met so unexpectedly in Sacramento. The woman she'd known… tough and wounded and yet indomitable… had become someone opaque and soft, someone who watched her with wary eyes even after they'd come to an understanding. Just the sight of her had brought back all the yearning in an agonizing rush, leaving her wanting and helpless. Spending a few hours in her company, cool and cordial, had made her long to make things between them work.

"Do you want me to back out, to walk away?" She asked bluntly.

Sara's eyes looked back at her solemnly, "That wasn't what I said." There was a hint of a flush to her cheeks, and a few wisps of hair had escaped her chignon.

She moved and leaned her back against the rail. "I'm just saying I honestly won't hold it against you." She reached up and pulled out a few hairpins, and her chignon dissolved into a fall of soft hair. "It's just, if you want out I'd rather you back out now, rather than later. That would only hurt both of us more." The flush deepened, and Sara glanced down.

However hard they were pretending that this was just friends hanging out, at least to start with, there was much more going on under the surface.

Sofia blew out a breath and pushed off of the railing and placed herself in front of Sara with only an inch between them, not giving a damn about their agreement in the moment.

"I know what it is you're trying to say Sara, but I do believe in, that most worthwhile things in life must be earned." She let out a sigh, trying to settle the flutter in her stomach.

"I don't know where we're going," she told the brunette softly. "But no way am I quitting now." She gently cupped her face and locked their eyes, her thumbs lightly stroke over the cheekbones, "so please answer my question, do you want me to walk away?"

Sara didn't responded at once; she just looked back at Sofia and got lost in thoughts. Sara had to admit to herself, Sofia was just as beautiful as ever. It wasn't just her features; it was the kindness hinted at in the lines of her face, the intelligence behind the warm eyes.

_...Great. I knew this would be a problem… _

In the time since she'd first considered Sofia as more than a friend, Sara had been aware on some level that entering into a relationship with her, if ever they did, would most likely be very intense.

If Sofia truly meant this, if she was serious, Sara was going to have a great deal of trouble keeping her at arms' length until she was sure. Not that she thought Sofia would try to force her to do anything she didn't want to do; she wouldn't be anywhere near her if that were the case. No, the problem was going to be keeping herself under control. Not touching her, not… well, kissing her...

…_She's getting to me. Oh hell, she already has… _

Her thoughts ran on ahead, presenting her with a glowing image of what it would be like with Sofia's attention turned on her every day. For a second she wanted nothing more than kiss her until she saw stars. But caution came right behind, whispering warnings.

…_It's only been a few days. That's not enough time. And anyway, it wouldn't be like that all the time, nothing is… _

True… her heart admitted, but went on imagining.

…_But wouldn't it be amazing to have it even part of the time? _

Sofia just stood and waited almost impatient worrying about Sara's answer.

"No. But if you want out, I'll understa…"

Sofia quickly closed the gap between them, moving to kiss her reassuringly. It was incredibly soft, incredibly tender and incredibly unexpected. Sara was the one caught by surprise and broke the kiss.

Sofia stayed close, though, and they watched each other carefully, silently questioning each other. The second kiss was hesitant and brief, but it was mutual. After a long moment of locked gazes, they moved in for kiss number three, it was just as soft, and lasted a bit longer than its predecessor, Sara opened her mouth, allowing Sofia's tongue to begin a gentle exploration.

When the kiss ended, Sofia leaned back, watching Sara keenly as her hands brushed stray locks of hair from her face. Both were breathing heavily, knowing a moment of truth was approaching.

Sofia took a step back, "sorry, I shouldn't have done that." She licked her lips nervously.

"Do you regret it?" She asked cautiously.

Sofia gave her a gentle smile, but her voice held a trace of nervousness mixed in with humor. "I don't know. Do you still respect me?"

Sara smiled when Sofia dropped her head, chuckling. Reaching out, she placed a reassuring hand on her arm. "If you remember, I didn't do anything to stop it, on the contrary," she said, flashing her a grin.

"Do you regret it?" Sofia asked in return.

"Regret? No. It was lovely. Was it fair to you? Probably not," she admitted with a shrug. "I still need for us to take it slow."

"There's no expectation here, we can take it slow" Sofia said kindly. "I want this to work, Sara."

Sara watched her intently, smiling as she reached to take her hand.

They spent the rest of the morning wandering around the lush park, taking it slowly in the muggy heat. Without verbalizing it, they stayed away from touchy topics, discussing only the vegetation around them and their work without any details.

Lunch was sandwiches from a small deli; Sofia insisted on paying for them, and Sara decided that it wasn't worth arguing over. They ate at a small table amidst the last of the lunch crowd, and Sara felt surprised at how comfortable it was. The first hurdle was past, and now they were doing what they hadn't done since Las Vegas so long ago… simply enjoying one another's company, without work.

"So what do you want to do this afternoon?" Sara asked as she finished her sandwich. Sofia had already indicated that she wanted to follow her lead, but she was the visitor, at least for the moment.

She polished off a potato chip, and kept a neutral face. "I don't mind building a lair" Sofia chortled.

Sara kept the grin to herself and took another bite of pickle, swallowing before she spoke again. "Nay don't think we can do that, I did promise Amy to invite her if we did so," she chuckled. "Anything else you want to do?"

Sofia couldn't hold back the snicker. "Spend time with you."

Sara set down her pickle, wiping her hands on her napkin. "I don't know what to suggest when you're being all communicative and stuff," she laughed.

"Neither do I, really," Sofia laughed, eyes meeting hers in a direct look that she found difficult to sustain.

Sara thought for a moment, "well we all like swimming, so we could go get you a swimsuit, then go home and get some towels, pack a cooler, pick Amy up, and spend rest of the day at the bay" she suggested.

"Sounds good." Sofia picked up her tray before Sara could, and threw out their trash.

They picked Amy and Adam up after school and spent rest of the day at the bay. Dinner was consumed at a Chinese restaurant, after driving Adam home they went home themselves. Sofia stayed for a couple of hours before she said goodnight and went home.

**Tbc… **


	19. Chapter 19

_**Chapter 19**_

An odd sort of symbiosis was taking place in the Sidle household. What Sara had intended in the beginning to be a once in a week get together was, by the third week of an unseasonably warm September, an almost several days a week ritual of dinner and overnight staying.

Sofia slowly got into the habit of spending weekends with Sara when neither of them had to work, as well as a couple of weeknights; rarely they took off on their own, but the rest of the time they hung out in Sara's home, something, she found she looked forward to as much as her private dates with Sara. Amy was as whip-smart as Sara, if more abstracted; but well-behaved, and she were always asking her questions …mostly about her work or about her childhood… that she was happy to answer.

They'd gotten into the habit of calling each other on evenings when they hadn't managed to get together, they often talked for hours, about forensics, work and nothing in particular, and both was surprised at how pleased they were by the situation.

Sofia stared at the small envelope, bemused. It wasn't often that her mail included something pink; rarer still did it have the image of Hello-Kitty emblazoned on it.

But among the bills and the ubiquitous junk mail she'd fished from her mail box lay this new missive, and while Sofia didn't precisely recognize the careful, round handwriting, she was reasonably sure she knew the sender. She took her handful of mail over to one of the counter and opened the pink envelope first, curious and amused.

Sure enough, it was from Amy; moreover, it was an invitation to her birthday party. Sofia realized she was delighted to be invited. The invitation included a pre-stamped RSVP postcard, also pink. Sofia carefully checked the appropriate box to say she would attend, grateful that she had no need to worry about a date.

Six days later she pulled into the driveway of the Sidle house, a little nervous. She'd had dinner with Sara and Amy lots of times, but Sofia figured that this event would include some of Sara's friends, and family, and she had realized suddenly that she knew very little about them.

Sara hadn't spoken much of friends, merely making reference in passing to colleagues with whom she occasionally went out for lunch or coffee.

She parked her car and climbed out, scooping up the wrapped box that held Amy's present and a bouquet for Sara, then shut the door and went inside.

The house was buzzing with life, a woman came into the hall and greeted her, from her looks Sofia guessed it was Sara's mother.

"Hello, I'm Laura Sara's mother."

"Hello, I'm Sofia one of Sara's friends and an old colleague from Vegas."

"Oh, so you are Sofia" Laura snickered, "heard a lot about you so nice finally to meet you. Sara is in the kitchen." She gave Sofia a smile, "well I'm sent out shopping so better get on my way" she said before disappearing out the door.

Sofia chuckled a bit and walked into the kitchen where she found Sara busy serving buns onto a dish, the table was already set with a big birthday cake with seven candles on the middle. Sofia went over and stood beside Sara with a big bouquet of calla lilies that had caught her eye at the florist; they were a deep rose that shaded towards a quiet pink on the edge, and seemed as elegant as Sara herself to her. She hoped she wasn't too over the top. But the flowers seemed right, an offering to reinforce the message she was trying to send. Certainty.

"Hi, congrats with your daughter" Sofia smiled. She handed her the paper-wrapped bouquet, and watched with delight as she pinked.

"Hi" Sara replied as she looked up. "Sofia, you didn't have to bring me anything." Sara ducked her head over the flowers, as though getting a closer look, "They're gorgeous," she said softly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome" Sofia said softly.

"Glad you could make it. Make yourself comfortable. But better look for toys before sitting down" Sara said with amusement.

"Thank you for inviting, but maybe I should find the birthday child before sitting down" Sofia answered.

"Okay" Sara smiled, "think she's in her room."

Sofia went to Amy's room, "hi there birthday girl, happy birthday, and hey Adam and hello to you young man" she smiled.

"Hi Sofia, and thanks" Amy smiled back. "This is Sean another of my friends" she said pointing at the boy standing beside Adam.

"Hey Sofia" Adam snickered.

"Hello" Sean said shyly.

Sofia handed Amy her present, "for you." She looked at Sean, "I'm Sofia."

Amy opened the present, "whao, thanks Sofia, I wished for that. Look guys, a deluxe chemistry set."

"Cool! I have one of those too and you can do some really cool experiments with it." Adam began laughing, "But I'm only allowed to make experiments when my dad is around."

"Yeah, but that's because you almost blew up the house" Amy laughed.

Sofia's eyes widen, "um, perhaps it will be best if you only make experiments when your mother is around, Amy" Sofia exclaimed.

"Okay" Amy laughed, "Or you can help me."

"Sure, if it's not too difficult" Sofia promised, "otherwise, your mother is the expert in that area. So what else have you gotten?"

"So far a CD from Adam, and another one from Sean, granny gave me a computer game, and I got clothes, books, and a charm for my bracelet from mom" Amy answered with a big smile.

"Amy" Sara called, "Jill is here."

Amy walked out of her room followed by Sofia, "okay mom, coming."

Sara was talking with Dina when they came into the hall. Sofia just gave the woman a smile and a nod. "You're welcome to stay" Sara said to Dina.

"Hi Jill" Amy said, "Come on Adam and Sean is already in my room."

"Thanks, but I can't stay, I have promised to come by and watch Joey's football match" Dina explained. She looked at her daughter, "have fun and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, bye mom" Jill said before following Amy to her room.

"Well good match then" Sara chuckled, "see you tomorrow, Dina."

"You too" Dina snickered as she opened the door and left.

Sara and Sofia went back to the kitchen, soon after Doug came in followed by Laura who had returned from her shopping. Next to arrive was Craig with his family and finally Nelly, Sara's old friend and colleague showed up.

Within minutes, the table was loaded with platters of goodies, the kids turned up and Amy attached herself to Sara's elbow, Sara asked a few questions about the latest presents before she asked people to sit down.

They all sat and chatted as the afternoon swung slowly towards late afternoon, there was singing before the cake was cut. The six kids bolted their seats and then headed back out to play, and Sara distributed beers around the table.

"Having fun?" Sara asked lightly, chasing some watermelon around her own plate with a fork.

Sofia swallowed a sip of beer. "Yes, actually," she cocked her head, "you have I nice family."

The other guests were as brilliant as Sara, Sofia could tell, and were all fairly likeable, being curious and open-minded. It didn't surprise her that the Sara chose people of like minds and tempers.

People finally got up from the table, Craig went outside and played with the kids, Laura stayed in the kitchen and help Sara cleaning the table, Nelly and Ellen was discussing a painting hanging on the wall, and Sofia was talking with Doug.

"Detective, nice seeing you again" Doug smiled.

"Hi Doug, and you too" Sofia smiled back.

Doug shot her another look, but couldn't keep his amusement hidden, "so seeing much of Frisco these days?" He asked waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Sofia looked back at Doug, finding herself smiling as he literally bounced on the balls of his feet in anticipation, "you could say I'm seeing my fair share of the city," she snickered, "not that you would notice, since you're in Sacramento all the time."

"Touché" Doug said softly, watching her carefully, "so things are going fine?"

"Yeah, I think so" Sofia said after a momentary pause. "But why don't you ask Sara?" She teased, giving his shoulder a gentle nudge.

"Because I'm not suicidal" Doug groused, trying to ignore Sofia's chuckling.

"Wise man" Sofia laughed.

"Excuse me" Doug said as he picked his ringing phone out of his pocket.

"Sure" Sofia replied, she turn around and went out in the garden.

Later Craig and Sara covered the entrance to the covered part of the terrace so they could eat dinner outside. The food was mostly vegetarian, salads and chips and deviled eggs, at some point Craig started up a grill to cook veggie burgers, steaks and real hot dogs.

After eating and cleaning up the table people scattered around the garden, Sofia was sitting on one of the garden benches standing in the backyard watching the sunset when Laura came over and sat down beside her.

Laura was the first to speak, "nice spot to watch the sunset" she said friendly.

Sofia smiled, her face almost golden in the soft glow of the sun ascending, "yeah, especially on a clear evening as tonight," she countered easily.

"So have you and Sara known each other for long?" Laura asked her voice warm and soothing.

Sofia thought for a moment, "about five or six years. We first met when I was transferred to her shift, but it wasn't really until the last year in Vegas we began seeing each other outside of work."

She cocked her head to watch Laura, wondering how much Sara had told about her time in Vegas, "but different circumstanced did that I eventually decided to leave Vegas" she said vaguely.

Laura didn't respond immediately, but examined Sofia closely. "I don't know about you, but if you were as miserable as Sara was when she left I don't blame you." She looked a little sad, "it's not like she has said much about her time in Vegas or how her life was back there, but I have to admit I'm glad she's back in Frisco, she looks much happier now than when she first arrived."

Her expression smoothed out, "and I'm glad you're back in her life again, I know that one of the few things she miss from Vegas is her friends, and I think it's good for her to have an adult in her life that's neither family nor work related."

Sofia leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and letting her clasped hands dangle between and stared at the orange- mauve horizon, "I assume on some level I am work related but I understand what you mean."

Sofia amused at the compliment, gave her a wink and looked back at the horizon, "and you're right about Sara, I don't think I ever saw her that happy in Vegas" she added, regarding Laura thoughtfully, "and if she'll let me, I intent to stay in her life."

Laura watched Sofia covertly, chuckling a little about what Sofia just had told her without saying anything, really. "Guess Sara can be more stubborn than most sometimes" she chortled, "but given time and she'll figure it out, she always does" she said reassuring.

"Oh, stubborn we can agree on" Sofia laughed, "I have witness her almost driving people insane with her stubbornness."

Their conversation was interrupted when Ian and Allison needed their grandma to settle a disagreement between them so Sofia got up and went inside to see if Sara needed help with anything.

Doug was the first to say goodnight, teasing Sara on his way out that some had to work so others could stay at home. Laura followed not much later since she also had to work the next day. In the middle of the evening Craig and Ellen said goodnight after Sara had ensured Ellen that it would be fine with five kids for Amy's sleepover and promised to call if she got any problems. Since it was getting to cold to stay outside the rest of the company moved into the living room, Nelly placed herself in one of the chairs, Sofia on the couch and Sara went to the kitchen to make some more coffee.

While the coffee was running through Sara called the Home to hear when Sean was to return since she had forgotten to ask when she picked him up.

"Hey Carmen."

"Hey Sara, what's up?"

"Just want to hear when Sean has to be back, I forgot to ask when I picked him up, and I don't expect he's allowed to stay for the sleepover."

"Hmm, no if we follow the rules he isn't, but since the state already has granted you one child, and since you indirectly are he's tutor because you teach here," she chuckled, "and if I forget to write it down, then I guess we could make an exception to the rules."

"Well, I won't tell if you don't" Sara chortled.

"Okay Sara, just have him back before noon tomorrow" Carmen said.

"Sure, bye Carmen." Sara said, she hung up and went into the living room with the coffee.

Sofia looked at Nelly, "so been working with Sara a long time?"

"Yeah on an off, we started at the crime lab about the same time and worked together until she moved to Vegas, and now again after she changed back to day shift." Nelly shot her a grin, "but it's not like I'm working that much with her now she's mentoring our newest CSI, Doug," she shrugged, "I miss it sometimes but its hard arguing about it when you can see what an outstanding job she is doing with him." She looked at Sofia, "you're one of her colleagues from Vegas, right?"

"Yes I worked on the same shift as her for a while, but we actually worked a lot more cases together after I switched from CSI and became a detective instead" Sofia chuckled. "Well it's not the first time she has a protégée and she definitely knows enough to mentoring beginners."

"I didn't have a protégée" Sara grinned, giving her an evil glare.

"No?" Sofia said, smiling at the evil look Sara gave her, "hmm, I don't recall Greg working much with me, and I think he scared or annoyed Grissom since he only worked with Greg when you were around" she replied lightly, turning to give her a teasing look.

Sara looked sideways at her, an eyebrow raised pointedly, "well I liked working with him, he was always fun to listen to, and always laced with opinion, commentary, and jokes. And besides, it wasn't like there was that many to work with after Ecklie split up the team" she said, giving her a wink.

Sara gave her an amused look before turning to Nelly, "so been out hiking lately?"

Nelly swung her head from side to side slowly, "nah, not as much as I would like to, seems like all my former partners is preoccupied doing anything else, and it's a bit boring hiking alone."

"Maybe you should talk to Sofia" Sara said mirthfully, "she's without a partner as well" she smiled broadly.

Sara got up and went to the kitchen to make popcorn, two bowls of toffee that went into Amy's room along with sodas, and a bowl with regular and one with cheddar along with a six-pack of beers that went into the living room.

"You also like hiking?" Nelly asked.

"Uh, huh," Sofia said, grinning at her as she got some coffee, "but my hiking partner left me for Washington."

"Well maybe we can find time to go on a common trip sometime" Nelly smiled.

Sara flashed them one of her grins, "count me out I'm not even close to be in shape for that kind of activity anymore."

"Nonsense" Nelly chortled, "you look in better shape than ever."

"Of course you are" Sofia agreed in a matter-of-fact manner. "Besides we can make the trip as long or short as we want."

A number of retorts ran through her mind, but she kept them to herself. Deciding it wasn't worth a fight, Sara lifted her hands in defeat. "Fine" her eye roll was eloquent.

They kept talking about hiking for a while, comparing good and bad places to do so.

Eventually Sara got up and went to Amy's room to announce it was time for the fry's to get ready for bed. Amy's room didn't have enough floor space for five air mattresses so they would all be sleeping in the library.

When everyone was in their night clothes and tucked into their sleeping bag each with a flashlight Sara read them a night story. It was carried unanimously to leave the light in the globe on, which it was when Sara said goodnight and left the room.

When Sara got back to the living room Nelly was getting ready to say goodnight, Sara walked her to the door and thanked her for coming before saying bye.

Sara went back to the living room and found Sofia sitting one leg lifted onto the couch and bracing her back against the armrest in a familiar way, walking over to the couch; Sara took a seat a respectable distance from her and rested one arm along the back on the couch.

Sofia merely tsked in a disapproving manner, "I don't bite!"

She just stared at her for a moment, eyes never leaving her face, then she shot her a grin as she sat straight up. Taking a deep sip of her beer, Sara slid over, settling comfortably against Sofia's side, smiling when she gently draped an arm over her shoulders.

"Probably not," Sara said, her voice teasing. "But we can work on that."

"Later." Sofia grinned; her arm tightened as Sara rubbed her cheek against hers, enjoying her scent. "Want to watch TV?"

Sara watched as Sofia's free hand reached down to capture hers. "Um…no, music is fine with me, unless you want to."

Sofia pulled back just a little her smile warm and tender, "no this is fine."

For a long time, they said nothing; simply holding each other in silence, letting the empty places fill with the other's caring. Every so often Sofia would stroke Sara's hair, or she would reach out and link her fingers with hers, enjoying the warmth of her skin.

Sara finally stood up slowly and stretched, turning her head to pop her neck. She stalked off towards the music rack, "any request?" She asked in a low tone.

Sofia shook her head, "no you pick something."

To make it easy Sara just turned on the radio that way the music would mix itself, while standing she went by the library to check that everyone was sleeping before returning to the couch.

Sofia's hands found their way around Sara again, one returning to the nape of her neck, and she leaned back slowly until she was half-lying against the arm of the couch, Sara on top of her. A soft, pleasured sound escaped Sara, her hand slid up and rested on Sofia's shoulder, as she smiled that charming half-smile.

"I could get use to this" Sara muttered at last, not moving.

Sofia rubbed her back in soothing circles, "me too" she said reassuringly, savoring the warmth of Sara pressed against her.

Sara leaned back just enough to see her face; Sofia's smile was without doubt. Sara _wanted_ to kiss her; that had never been the problem. She really, really wanted to feel the pressure of her mouth on hers again, to catalogue the sensations and compare them to the previous occasions, to have her taste on her lips once more. To know again that Sofia did want her after all, as much as she did her. But it wasn't smart. Not yet. She needed more time.

Sofia easily read her. A small, soft smile touched her lips; she lifted one hand carefully, like a woman trying not to drive off something wild and wary. Curious, Sara didn't move, and then her heart melted when Sofia slid her fingers lightly along her jaw until she could cup her hand around it. The touch was infinitely gentle, and bore no hint of sexuality; instead it felt like wonder. When she didn't move, Sofia's smile deepened, and then her hand dropped away.

Sara didn't know if Sofia understood, but the blonde tilted her head a little, and then enveloped Sara in an unexpected hug, a warm wrap of arms that felt wonderful and brought home again the notion that Sofia could be, would be, a marvelous comfort as well as a temptation.

Both stayed silent and just enjoyed the closeness until both was yawning so much that they agreed to call it a night. Sofia cleaned the table while Sara checked the doors and the kids. They met in front of the bathroom, Sara coming out Sofia waiting to get in. Sara said goodnight and gave her a quick kiss at the door, and while the temptation to hold her still and make something more of it was nearly overwhelming, Sofia restrained herself. It was still Sara's ball game, in a sense. So she kept it to a goodnight herself.

**Tbc…**


	20. Chapter 20

_**Chapter 20 **_

Sara was the only one up when Laura arrived the next morning with crusty rolls, the coffee was already made so they filled a cup each and went out on the terrace to enjoy the morning sun.

"The night went all right?" Laura asked.

"Yeah, when they first got into bed it didn't take long before all of them slept" she smiled.

"Good" Laura chortled, "then maybe I can look forward to more grandchildren" she teased.

"Oh…no" Sara sputtered, "one is more than enough for me" she insured.

"You don't want Amy to be an only child, now do you?" Laura teased on, "and a few more shouldn't be a problem with two grown-ups in the house."

Sara stared at her for several long seconds, her steely brown gaze locked on hers. "Er, to the best of my knowledge there's only one adult in this house, and it's not like Amy will ever be alone, she will always have Ian and Allison in her life," she said, managing a genuine smile.

Laura gave her one of her own in return, "I know." She leaned forward a little, "what about Sofia?"

Startled, Sara blinked, "What about her? She's a friend" she informed her, a little too quickly.

Laura eyed her skeptically, but eventually nodded her head. "I know, but I think there's more to it than just that."

Sara bit her lip, hard. Not sure this was a conversation she wanted to have with her mother. She leaned back in her chair and shrugged, "maybe, I don't know, it's complicated." She trailed off, not quite sure how to explain it, but Laura smiled back, eyes crinkling.

"Its scaring letting someone in, I know" Laura said gently, "but it's easy to see that Sofia thinks you're wonderful and really likes you." She shook her head, "don't let your stubbornness and fear prevent you for being happy, it's dumb," she added.

It made sense. It made a lot of sense, actually, and it made Sara realize something else. "I'm scared," she admitted in a low voice. "But it's not only that, I don't want Amy to get hurt because I make a bad decision."

"Of course you are, if you let her in, she can hurt you" Laura replied, still gentle, "but no matter how cautious you are you can't prevent Amy for ever getting hurt, that's unfortunately a part of life," her voice was soothing, "but have you thought about the possible that none of you gets hurt and Amy instead ends up with two adults that loves her?"

"No not really" Sara slowly admitted. "What about the fact that she's a woman, that doesn't bother you?" She nervously clenched and unclenched her hands.

"No… should it?" Laura looked at her daughter, "I might not live as a hippie anymore, but my conviction of…free love… haven't changed. Love is too precious to walk away from out of a minor detail as gender."

The subject ventured into territory Sara wasn't prepared to go with her mother just quite yet, "good to know" Sara said gratefully, "but I think I need some more time to figure out what to do."

Both heard the children's excited voices coming from the house so they got up and went inside.

"Morning everyone" Sara said, "There's crusty rolls in the kitchen so why don't all of you go in there and sit down.

"Morning" echoed back as they all went to the kitchen.

The table was quickly set, and it didn't take long before everyone was busy eating, talking and laughing. Sofia shortly after showed up and joined the crowd. After breakfast the kids disappeared to get dressed.

When Laura left an hour later she brought Sean with her since she drove by the Home anyway. Adam left a little later when his parents picked him up on their way to his grandmother's birthday. Dina came by around noon and stayed for coffee before she left with her daughter.

When Craig arrived in the afternoon he found Sara in front of Sofia's car with the hood open, looking into the engine room.

"Hi sis, engine trouble?" He asked.

"Hi, nah… not really just her V-belt that needs to be tighten" Sara answered with a smile.

"And you know how to do that?" He teased.

Sara raised her brows, "no I'm just standing here to look smart" she smirked.

Craig just shot her a grin, "so have the off-spring behaved?"

"Yeah, they have been sweet; think they are in the backyard with Amy."

"Good. Oh before I forget it, Ellen told me to ask you if you have made any plans for Thanksgiving, otherwise you're welcome to spend it with us. Ellen's parents and one of her sisters is coming as well." Craig chortled a little, "and you are welcome to bring your girlfriend along."

Sara threw up her hands dramatically, "she is not my girlfriend" she appealed.

Craig ran a hand through his hair, eyes twinkling; "uh-huh" he chuckled, not sounding convinced.

Sara rolled her eyes, "Craig, she's just a friend" she told him, her throat filled with emotion.

Craig's face wrinkled up in disbelief "Friends? What the h… heck are you doing?"

Sara smirked at his last-second substitution, but answered him. "We agreed to stay friends for the moment. I don't know Craig, it's just complicated."

"Sis, c'mon. The woman is completely gone on you. You could tell her to go play in traffic and she'd do it just to make you happy."

Sara folded her arms, a little troubled by his words. "Maybe. But I'mnot ready." She tried to figure out how to explain. "I just need to be sure I'm doing the right thing for both Amy and me."

Craig let out a long breath then shrugged a conceding gesture. "Okay. You know what's best for you. But Sara…" He hesitated. "Don't wait too long. All things end sometime." He let the corner of his mouth turn up, "and I don't think you have to worry about Amy, she really seems to like Sofia she definitely talks a lot about her."

As if on cue, the kids emerged from the backyard and hurrying towards them, Ian and Allison gave Craig a breathless hug that was returned with warmth. Craig told them to go get their things, he asked Sara to let them know about Thanksgiving before they said their goodbyes.

For the rest of the day the two adults and the little lady just enjoyed each other's company, they made a few chemistry experiment, played board games and watch a movie. Amy was tucked in at her usually time up to a school day, and Sofia went home several hours later.

Sara was resting against the bed head when her phone rang, "sidle speaking" she said as she picked up.

"Hi" Sofia said, "sorry to call so late, the trip home took forever" she yawned. "Am I disturbing you?"

Sara glanced around her room automatically, "no, I'm pretending the paperwork I brought home doesn't exist" she snickered.

"For now, it doesn't," Sofia agreed. "Where would you rather be?"

It was a game they'd fallen into during their late-night calls, comparing fantasies of time off and vacations that they'd probably never get around to. Sara had confided her secret wish to visit Africa and hunt lions…with a camera…and Sofia had somewhat wistfully described a desire to visit Asia to see the Buddhists temples. "Tonight," Sara sighed and fiddled with the hem of her shirt, "a sailboat, somewhere sunny and warm, off the coast of the Fiji islands, maybe."

"You can sail?"

"I grew up on the water, of course I can sail." Sara tipped her head back and grinned at the ceiling. "You don't?"

"Of course I can," Sofia mimicked. "I use to sail all the time when I was a kid." She thought for a moment, "It's been a long time, though."

"Yeah." Sara hadn't been out on the water for fun since she'd rented a sailboat at Lake Mead her first year in Vegas. "Where would you rather be?"

"Beside you."

The bottom dropped out of her stomach at the two low words. "Yeah?" Sara asked, keeping her voice casual. "You do that several times a week, Sof."

"Mmm, that doesn't keep me from wanting it," Sofia said softly, and Sara felt her pulse speed up. Judging by the tone in Sofia's voice, she wasn't feeling restrained at the moment. "You know how I feel when I see you in one of those suits you wear to court?" She asked.

Sara blinked. "No…"

"You're so elegant. You look like nothing in the world can stop you." Sofia sighed. "But when you take off the jacket…"

"Sofia…"

"Part of me just wants to hold you forever, Sara," Sofia said, her voice wistful, and then it deepened, going a little husky. "Part of me wants to undo those blouse buttons one by one, and taste your skin."

Sara shivered. There was nothing truly explicit in her words, but it was Sofia saying them. The images that rode in on her tone exploded vivid and compelling in her head, joining the half-conscious fantasies that had swum in her mind on the edge of aching, lonely sleep. The mere idea of Sofia's mouth pressed to her belly…

Sara felt her lips turn up, and she leaned back further in her bed. "How long have you been thinking along those lines?" She asked, guessing the answer but willing to play the game.

The faintest laugh sounded in her ear. "Since I met you," Sofia repeated.

Sara purred she couldn't help it, "turnabout is fair play, I guess."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Every time you take off yourjacket I can't get over the way your hips swagger."

That threw Sofia a bit, she could tell. "My swagger?"

"And your fingers. You have the sexiest fingers I've ever seen." The teasing fell away a little. "Gentle, you know?"

"I didn't know that was a turn-on," Sofia said, voice going husky again.

"It definitely is for me." Sara wished she could be as poetic as Sofia. "You know that habit you have of rolling your hips when you're walking?"

"Yes..."

"Been driving me nuts for years." Sofia's chuckle made her grin.

"I'll keep that in mind. Sara..."

She cocked her head as though she were watching her. "Yeah?"

"Thank you."

It was Sara's turn to be puzzled. "For what?"

"For... giving me chance."

Sara bit her lip again, and struggled to keep her tone light. "You're welcome, and thank you for being patience."

"Whatever you need, Sara" Sofia assured her softly.

Sara was really starting to believe her.

Sara was walking down the hallways at the precinct in pursuit of Sofia; the case she was working had her running late. She already called her mother and arranged for her to pick Amy up, but Sofia would need a key to lock herself in if she was leaving first.

"Hi you, got a minute?" Sara asked when she finally found Sofia.

"Hi yourself" Sofia smiled, "sure what's up?"

Sara handed her a key, "I'm running late, so just in case you leave before me."

"Thanks that was thoughtful of you" Sofia smiled as she took the key, "what about Amy?"

"My mom will pick her up and stay with her until one of us gets home." Sara suddenly looked shy, realizing that she just had referring to her home as Sofia's home as well. "Um, I mean until one of us gets there" she stammered, "um, if you don't mind looking after Amy if you're the first of us to leave."

Sofia gazed around, and when it didn't seem like anyone was around she got up and lightly took Sara's hand, "Sara, I spend half my time at your place so I don't mind you're calling it home, I know what you mean. Hell I know your house as well as I know my own" she chortled, giving her a hand a squeeze before letting it go, "and no I don't mind looking after Amy, but don't expect me to cook dinner" she laughed.

"Oh, I won't" Sara laughed relieved, "better get back to the lab, see you later" she said leaving the room.

"Later Sidle" Sofia snickered as she sat back down.

When Sara arrived home Sofia's bike was already parked in the driveway. She had finished as quickly as she could so she wasn't really running much later than usually. She found Sofia in the kitchen with a cup of tea.

"Hi, been here long?" Sara asked.

"Hi, no half an hour or so, Amy isn't home yet" Sofia replied, "guess you're not that late after all."

"Well, traffic can be hell this time a day" Sara chortled.

The front door swung open, Amy came running in and right past them into her room and slammed her door shut without a word.

Sara looked confused in the direction Amy had disappeared before turning to her mother, "what is that about?" She asked.

"I don't know what happened" Laura said softly. "We drove by a small road accident on our way home, nothing major" she quickly assured, "all the sudden Amy started screaming until she threw up, and after that she just stared into space with a stone-face. I pulled over as soon as it was possible but she totally refused to talk, so I decided it was better just to get her home" Laura explained.

"Oh, God." Sara put her face in her hands and sighed. Without another word, she turned on her heels and walked towards Amy's door, holding her breath as she ascended.

Sara found Amy sitting on her bed, staring straight ahead into her blank TV screen. "I don't want to talk about it." Her words were slow and measured, and she spoke them with a deadly tone.

For the first time in a long time, Sara didn't see Amy as a sweet-natured little girl but as the survivor that she was. "Sweetie…" she whispered softly as she sat on the edge of the mattress.

"I'm weird."

"Don't say that, sweetie…"

"I am" After a moment of silence, the girl shrugged off her mother's comforting hand that rest on her back. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Amy…" Sara sighed not sure if to press on or not.

"I want to be alone now," Amy huffed, though Sara could sense an undertone of tears about to fall.

"All right," she said, getting up off of the bed. "I'll be in the kitchen if you change your mind."

Sara found Laura and Sofia in the kitchen. "How is she?" Laura asked worried.

"I don't know" Sara sighed, "she doesn't want to talk." Sara looked at her mother's worried face, "mom, don't blame yourself it's not your fault."

"I know" Laura sighed, "I just feel sad for her; I don't think I've ever seen someone looking so scared before." She glanced at her watch, "I have promised to look after Allison and Ian, but I can cancel it if you want me to stay."

Sara shook her head, "no you go, I don't think we can do much else than wait until she's ready to talk anyway."

"Okay sweetie, but call me if you need anything."

"I will" Sara promised as she walked Laura to the door, "and sorry about your car."

"I'll live" Laura smiled, she hugged her daughter and left.

Sara went back to the kitchen and sat down next to Sofia and took her hand, "What am I going to do about this?" She pressed her lips together, feeling real pain for Amy. "I don't have a magic wand I can wave to make this all better. How do I get her to talk about it?"

Sofia shrugged. "I think the first question to ask is what triggered her behavior in the first place?"

"I still have the social worker's number." Sara looked at her watch. "It's five-thirty. Maybe she has some back-ground information. Think I should call?"

"It's up to you."

Sara sighed and found her cell phone. She scanned the contact list for the social worker. "The last time I was in contact with her, I ended up with a kid," she mumbled as she located the phone number. After greeting the woman, Sara quickly launched into her current situation and asked for any information the social worker could provide.

"Let me see if I can remember the details" the woman continued. "Amy was in the car when it crashed and was the only one that got out alive. She had to sit and watch the paramedics remove her family before they could get to her because she was stuck. She never spoke a word about the accident during the rescue or later when she was taken to see a psychologist." The social worker sighed, "That's about all I can tell you."

"Okay, thanks." The women soon said their goodbyes and Sara numbly closed her cell. She relayed the information to Sofia. "I don't know what to do."

"You should probably talk to Amy."

"She won't talk to me."

"She will eventually," Sofia assured her gently. "Do you want me to leave, so you two can be alone to talk things over?"

Sara shook her head quickly. "No, please stay. Um, if you want to." She looked rather uncertain, and Sofia smiled at her.

"I want to" Sofia lightly squeezed her hand, "want me to cook for a change?"

Sara gave her a warm smile, "no that's okay, let's just order some pizza."

The pizza arrived and while Sofia was setting the table Sara slowly went back to Amy's room feeling as if she were going to meet her executioner. There were so many occasions during her limited time as a mother when she felt clueless as to what to do, but this felt enormously.

Amy was where she left her, crumpled in the corner of her bed. Sara could feel her heart split in two at the sight. It physically hurt to see the girl in pain. She knocked on the open door and waited for an answer. When none came, she took a tentative step inside.

"Amy…" The girl was silent. Sara pulled the nearby chair up close to the bed and sat down so she was facing Amy, "sweetie, I know you want to be alone but you need to eat, there is pizza in the kitchen" Sara said hoping Amy would respond to that.

Amy lifted her head from her pillow, her red-rimmed eyes meeting Sara's sober stare, "I still don't want to talk about it" she said her voice rough with emotion.

"And you don't have to, it can wait until you feel ready to talk about it" Sara assured, "I understand…"

Amy was out of the bed before Sara had a chance to finish the sentence, "no you don't, you don't understand" Amy shouted.

Sara backed away momentarily, her eyes wide with shock. She saw Amy darting out the door. She was moving quickly; Sara got up and went after Amy and with her longer legs she caught up with her in the space between the kitchen and the living room. She dropped to her knees, and grabbed her, leaning her head away from Amy's swinging fists.

"Let me go! Let me go!" Amy yelled, looking at her with imploring eyes.

But Sara didn't let go. Amy's struggles grew weaker until she finally collapsed against Sara in defeat and exhaustion. Sara moved and wrapped her arms around her and just held her.

Sofia was standing in the kitchen not sure about where to place herself, wondering if she should go outside and leave the two of them in private or stay, but Sara solved that question as she picked Amy up and nodded for Sofia to take a seat.

"I'm not normal" Amy said as the tears began to fall again, but the anger failed to dissipate.

**Tbc…**


	21. Chapter 21

_**Chapter 21**_

Sara sat down keeping the now weeping girl on her lap. She wanted to hug and soothe and tell Amy that everything was going to be all right, but this wasn't a scraped knee or a stomach virus. "Amy, I need to tell to you about my life when I was a little girl." Amy raised her head and Sara knew she had captured her attention.

Sara drew in a breath and began, "do you know I lived some of my childhood in the foster care system?"

Sara wasn't sure if any of the other children had told Amy about it, since she hadn't joined the group yet by the time when Sara had told about it.

Amy shook her head, "no."

"When I was a little bit older than you my dad died after being stabbed with a knife." Sara stopped for a moment to think about how to explain without going into details.

"I was there when it happened but I wasn't big enough to prevent it from happening, all I could do was to call 911, but it was too late by the time they arrived. Eventually a social worker came and brought Craig and me to a foster home."

Amy narrowed her brows, "but you still had grandma, why didn't she take care of you?"

Sara swallowed hard not sure about how to answer that, she didn't wanted to lie to her daughter but at the same time she didn't wanted to scare her by telling that Laura was the one how had killed her father.

"My father wasn't a nice man to neither one of us so when he died she was so broken that the state decided she wasn't capable of taking care of us but instead needed to go away for a while" Sara explained.

Amy considered this for a long while. "So you… you had to live in a place like I did?"

Sara nodded, "yes."

"But you still had Craig."

"No not really, we were sent to different homes because of the difference in age, and it wasn't so easy back then to stay in touch so we lost track of each other."

"And nobody… nobody adopted you?"

"No. It has pretty much just been me since then," she answered. "Until I got back to Frisco and met my family again, and now, now I've got you."

Amy's arms went around her mother's neck, and Sara took the time to comfort her daughter.

"Shh…it's all right. I didn't tell you this to make you sad. I told you this so you can understand that I do know what you're going through." She stroked the little girl's hair. I know you're upset. And you know what? I'm really glad that you are."

Amy lifted her head from her mother's shoulder and looked at her, "why?"

"Because it tells me that you are a healthy young girl who isn't afraid to show when she's upset."

Amy sighed, laying her head back down on her mother's shoulder but before long she began telling about her experience.

"I suddenly remembered the car crash again. It scared me. And I… freaked out a little bit" she said quietly, "it was like I was sitting in the car again and all I could hear was the quietness."

She continued, squinting her eyes as if to see the past more clearly, "I couldn't move and no one answered my call out, and then I got this strange taste in my mouth and the next thing I remember was that I was throwing up and that grandma was saying my name."

Sara said nothing at first. It killed her to know that this memory was still living inside her daughter, and that there was nothing she could do to erase it. Parents were supposed to fix thing, to make things better. But there was no way to change what happened.

"And that made you think that you're not normal?" She asked tentatively.

Amy seemed to consider the question thoughtfully, "yeah, it's like most of the time I feel normal, but when this happened I didn't feel normal anymore."

"Well sweetie, let me tell you, you are actually very normal" Sara smiled, "we all have experiences we react to, for some it's provoked by a specific smell or a sound and for others it's a view. For me for example it's the smell of blood that makes me remember what happened to my dad."

For me its whenever I see a lose dog close to the road, then I remember the dog I had when I was a child and how I lost it because he ran out on the road and got run over" Sofia said.

"You know what? I don't even know what normal is, but in my book you're better than normal, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Okay" Amy nodded reflectively. "Can I have some pizza?" She asked with a little smile.

"Of course, I think we all could eat" Sara answered. She placed Amy on a stool and went to get some juice from the fridge.

During dinner the talk some more about the senses influence on the memory, but they kept it mostly to good memories. Sofia always remembered her grandmother whenever she saw or smelled a particular flower. Sara told that whenever she saw a stray cat it always remembered her about the abandoned kitten she found as a girl and how she and Craig had hidden it in the garage so their parents wouldn't find out.

Amy didn't really have that many memories yet, but she promptly got the meaning of it, "so when I grow up and for example sees a dolphin I will remember our vacation to Hawaii?" She asked.

"Probably" Sara smiled, "but that's what so odd about our mind, we can't really be sure about what it remembers and what it forgets, it's like the mind have its own filters."

"It's okay I guess" Amy shrugged, "I have a lot of pictures from that trip anyway, so I can always look at those if the mind can't remember it" She said logically.

That statement made both Sofia and Sara laugh. Sara got up and cleaned the table. "So is everything okay?" Sara asked, feigning nonchalance as she loaded dishes from the sink to the dishwasher.

Amy was silent for a moment as she tilted her head and considered the question. "Yeah, I think so."

Sara felt a sense of relief wash over her. Amy hadn't swept her experience, as painful as it must have been, under the rug and just given her a resounding 'Yes!' instead she had talked about it and was now trying to understand what had happened.

Touched, Sara smiled. "Good. So, ready for a bath? I think we need to do that before anything else."

Amy shifted uncomfortably, blushing a little bit, "is grandma mad because I threw up in her car?"

"No she isn't, she was just worried about you."

"It was so embarrassing" Amy blushed.

"I bet" Sara chortled, "but she's use to it, Ian always got car sick when he was little so he threw up in cars all the time" she assured. "So, ready for your bath?"

"Mmm" Amy snickered, "in the tub with lots of bubbles."

Though Sara originally had planned to keep Amy home from school the next day to make sure she was all right, she rethought that decision as she watched her daughter. Not only did it seem like Amy was much stronger than Sara had ever realized, but she also seemed to need to be treated as normally as possible.

While Sara and Amy were bathing Sofia made a pot of coffee. Sofia felt something between honored and surprised about Sara had let her stay while she had told Amy about her own up-bringing. Somehow Sofia hadn't been all that surprised to learn about Sara's childhood. Her reaction pattern towards some cases they had worked together back in Vegas had often made her wonder if Sara were hiding her own dark secret, but she had never dared to ask. Of course on some level she couldn't help feeling a bit sad for Sara and the things she had had to live through, but truth be told, she was much more impressed to see what Sara had accomplished with her life.

Amy and Sara came back, the girl now in her pajamas. Sofia and Sara talked a bit about work while Amy got her home-work done. Afterwards they played a game of scrabble until it was Amy's bedtime, Sara read another chapter in their night book she tucked Amy in and said goodnight.

Sofia was sitting on the couch flipping through the channels when Sara returned; she turned off the TV and watched Sara drop onto the couch with a low sigh.

"Are things okay?"

"Yeah" Sara said, sighing again.

"What's wrong?" Sofia asked, obviously concerned.

Sara traced a pattern on the couch seat with a finger, "I think I got lulled into thinking that things are going well. She is so bright that it's so easy to think that she is just another normal girl without an ugly backpack, but today showed with all clarity that she isn't." Sara paused for a moment, "I'm not sure that she ever will be able to put what happened behind her."

"Have you?"

Sara blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Have you been able to put what happened to you behind you?"

Sara thought for a moment, cataloguing the residual fears that had faded with the years, but were still present in the back of her mind. "I..."

"You've had Amy for what ten months now," Sofia explained. "You can't erase what happened in ten months, Sara. I don't think you can erase it, period." Sofia said gently. "You want to because you love her and it hurts you to see her cry. You're her mom. Mothers do what's best for their children." There was a slight pause and then she continued. "You can't erase what she's lived through. You can build on it."

Sara exhaled, closing her eyes. "I know and it's what I'm trying to do."

"I know, and it's working."

"Yeah, but look what happened today… I swear, sometimes I feel like an elephant surrounded by Crystal Walls!"

"Sara, its working," Sofia said, squeezing her hand reassuring.

Sara gave her a little smile, "thanks."

"For what?"

"For staying" Sara answered.

"Oh! You're welcome" Sofia smiled back. "Maybe you better call your mother and let her know that things are okay."

"Yeah guess I should."

She got up and called Laura who was relieved to hear that everything was okay. Before they got off the phone Laura reminded her that Craig still was waiting for an answer about Thanksgiving.

"Do you have any plans for Thanksgiving?" Sara asked.

"No not yet, I still don't know if I'll be at work or not, why?"

"Craig asked if we want to celebrate it with them." Sara giggled, "And I was welcome to bring my girlfriend."

"Huh?"

Sara began laughing, "Well it seems like both mom and Craig are under the impression that you're my girlfriend."

"Oh! Why?"

Sara shrugged, "probably because of all the time we spend together."

"Right!" Sofia cleared her throat, "does it bother you that they think that?" She asked hastily.

"No not really. They like you and are cool with whoever I chose to be with" Sara said firmly. "I just wanted to warn you if you decide to come along, I know Craig and how he likes to tease people so just consider it a fair warning" Sara explained, sounding the slightest bit nervous.

Sofia was definitely amused, judging by the way the corners of her mouth were twitching, "somehow that doesn't surprise me, but don't worry I'm sure I can handle him" she chuckled.

"Yeah, he's really not that bad when you get to know him" Sara assured.

Sara moved on the couch and pressed Sofia down to a lying position and placed herself half lying on top of her and turned on the TV. For a long neither of them spoke and when they eventually did it was about what they were watching. Both went to bed early, Sara was so exhausted she slept the second her head hit the pillow.

A few hours later than Amy and Sara, and due to work, Sofia emerged in front of Craig and Ellen's home. Sara came out and opened the door for her as she approached.

"Hi, you found it" Sara greeted with a warm smile.

"Hi, yeah it wasn't that hard to find" Sofia replied with a smile.

As they entered the house they walked into the fragrant smell of baking bread and roasted turkey. Sofia was introduced to Ellen's side of the family; she briefly talked with Laura and got a quick hug from Amy before Craig emerged from the kitchen, drying his hands on a towel.

"Glad you could make it," he said, all open friendliness, and Sofia was struck at the similarity between brother and sister… the unafraid gaze, the willingness to meet things head-on. Sara had lost some of that confidence during her last year in Las Vegas, but it had returned.

"So am I," she replied.

Craig jerked a thumb at the kitchen. "Want a beer?"

"Sure."

Craig pulled three bottles from the fridge and opened them, handing one each to his sister and Sofia as Sara followed them in.

"Aunt Sara? We need some help." Allison's voice sounded.

Sara sighed melodramatically. "Why is it always me?"

"You're more fun than me and Ellen," Craig retorted.

"Sorry about this. I should be back in a minute," she said to Sofia, then picked up her beer bottle and padded out of the room.

"Take your time, it gives me a chance to grill her," Craig called after her, and Sofia turned just in time to see the rude gesture Sara made before she vanished. Craig chuckled. "Some things never change. The kids love her," he added. "What about your parents?" He asked.

Sofia blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

Craig shrugged, snagging a dishtowel to dry his hands. "You don't usually spend the holidays with them? Not that we're not glad to have you," he added.

"I work most holidays, but my mother, brother and I usually try to get together around Christmas. I might fly out to see her this year, since I won't be on call." As it was, Sofia hadn't really planned that far in advance.

"Well, you're welcome to join us if you don't," Craig said cheerfully.

Sofia bemused by the casual invitation, gathered her thoughts, "thank you."

Craig glanced over at Sofia, "are you serious about her?"

"Excuse me?" Sofia leaned against the counter, looking idly down at her beer bottle. Condensation was pearling along its sides.

"I know it's none of my business but I love my sister, Sofia. I know she has turn invitations down flat, and I've seen her walk right past guys that were willing to do practically anything just to get her to smile at them. Smart guys, too."

Craig sighed, turning to rest one hip against the counter, and then grinned a little at Sofia's dumbfounded expression. "I don't know what Sara was like in Las Vegas, but coming back to Frisco is good for her, she brightened up and she really enjoys it. She talks like she wants to spend the rest of her life here."

_Is he warning me off?_ Sofia wondered.

"Sara made her life good, but it's still missing a piece. I think you might be that piece," he said, as if it explained everything.

Sofia swallowed, trying to get a handle on Craig's extraordinary monologue. "That may be true, but it's no guarantee that she'll let me be a part of… of her future."

"True." Craig reached for his own beer. "And Sara's more stubborn than a skunk sometimes. And if she finds out I'm telling you this, she'll kill me," he added in a wry tone. But…"

On some level, Sofia was aware that this conversation should be making her far more uncomfortable than it actually was. "But?"

Craig lifted the bottle at Sofia in a toast. "But you're here."

Sofia felt a smile coming on. "Yes. I am." She took another sip of beer and regarded Craig thoughtfully. "Aren't you going to threaten to kill me if I hurt her?"

Craig chuckled. "Is that what a good brother is supposed to do?" He ran a hand through his hair, eyes twinkling. "I don't have to. Sara will kill you herself."

Soft voices reached them as Ellen and Sara came into the kitchen, Craig grinned and tilted his head back to look at them. "Hello ladies."

"Is everything all right?" Sofia asked.

Sara snickered, "yeah." The house was full of the scent of roasting turkey, and Sara was thankful that the smell itself didn't nauseate her.

They all went into the living room and found the rest of the family occupying on the couch's, watching the football game, with Ian in the middle rooting for the team with the lower score. Amy and Allison, who wasn't into football was playing with some toys at the other end of the big room.

Sara leaned over the back of the couch and ruffled Ian's hair. "Who's winning?"

"The guys in white." He was more of a football enthusiast than his dad, who mostly tended to watch the holiday game for tradition's sake.

"They're ten points ahead," Ellen's father added.

Sara grinned at Sofia, and caught a faint hint of wistfulness on her face, an expression that vanished as she returned her smile. It puzzled her, but she didn't pursue it.

Dinner took a long time, opening with a slightly more elaborate grace than usual. The food was excellent; Craig, like his sister, was skilled in the kitchen, and proceeding with everyone stuffing themselves as full as the bird. Sofia was relaxed, Sara noted, approving the way that Sofia seemed to be feeling at home.

After dinner and some sporadic cleanup, everyone went outside, the kids and some of the adults kicked a ball around and the rest just sat down and talked. Eventually it got too dark to continue, and they trooped back inside with rosy cheeks to sit down to a table full of pastry. Craig had performed his usual miracles with piecrust, and Laura's bakery offering was almost as good; Ellen's mother had brought her traditional baklava as well, which was Sara's first choice. It was a holiday, and so Craig declared a moratorium on limits, and they all stuffed themselves again.

It was three very stuffed but satisfied ladies that went home later in the evening, Amy could hardly keep her eyes open so Sara put her straight to bed and the girl was sleeping before they got around to their bedtime story.

As almost tradition Sofia and Sara ended up lying on the couch, Sara halfway cuddled up on top of Sofia with her head resting on her chest, and Sofia with an arm loosely resting on the brunette's back.

Sara yawned, "Tell me a story," she said, sounding half-asleep.

Sofia looked at her, confused. "What?"

She grinned at her, looking both sleepy and mischievous. "Tell me a story. I want to hear what kind of stories you know in case you need to tuck Amy in sometime."

It was an absurd request, especially since Sara usually was reading to Amy, but somehow in this quiet sanctuary of hers it seemed perfectly normal. A hundred possibilities tumbled through Sofia's head, from work stories to a few jokes, but none of them suited this one moment. She went back further, to one of the stories her grandmother used to tell when she was a child.

Leaning back comfortably, she retold it as best she could; she kept her voice low and soothing. It was an old fairy tale, of an evil squire who did whatever he wanted and took whatever he wanted until a resourceful young woman stopped him; for some reason it had always been Sofia's favorite.

By the time she was finished, Sara was asleep, and Sofia was pleased that she'd managed to soothe her into slumber. She was very tempted to stay just where she was and watch her sleep, but instead she managed to wriggle herself out from under Sara and rose carefully, restraining the desire to brush her hair from her face and went for a comforter and gently placed it around her. Sofia left quietly and checked Amy before she went to bed herself.

Sara woke up in the middle of the night. Confused at first why she was sleeping on the couch. It took a few minutes for the memory of Sofia to return, and then she couldn't decide whether to be pleased or embarrassed about asking her for a story. _What am I, five?_

Yet she hadn't seemed anything but surprised; she'd just thought a moment then begun a tale about some evil guy who lived in a castle. Sara had to admit that she couldn't remember most of the story.

_Maybe...maybe someday I can get her to tell it again. _

A strange thought, but an interesting one, she took her time about washing her face and brushing her teeth, enjoying the momentary peace of solitude, before going to bed.

**Tbc…**


	22. Chapter 22

_**Chapter 22 **_

Sara was on her way back to the lab after working a missing items case at the local museum. While working there Sara had received a message from the director that her presence was desired in her office when she returned. Rumor had it, Doug had told her with a chuckle, that she was up for a promotion but Sara had just rolled her eyes and refrained from explaining that there could be a lot of reasons why her presence was required.

Sara strode past various layout rooms and offices, about half of which still had people at them, working on anything from blood samples to clothing restoration to paperwork, and made her way to the second floor where director Stephanie Douglas' office was placed, she knocked and went inside.

"Hello" Sara said, "You wanted to see me."

"Hello Sidle. Yes please come in" Stephanie answered. She nodded, and waved her towards a seat.

Sara sat down, "so, what's up?"

"Direct as always" Stephanie chortled, she placed her pen on the desk. "I want to speak to you about your future here. As you know John Moore has decided to retire at the end of the year and it's been decided to offer you his position." She folded her hands, propped her elbows on her desk, and regarded her for a moment. "We think you're the right one for that position."

"Oh!" Was all Sara said at first, "Why me?" I'm sure you have more qualified personnel than me."

Stephanie shook her head, "no we believe you are the best choice. You are more than qualify, and you are well-liked among your colleagues, and until now you have done an outstanding job both in your own cases and with the young people on your team."

Stephanie's word made Sara blush a little; "maybe" she hesitated, trying to muster another argument, "but I don't have any experience in leading a team, and I don't know anything about the right procedure of handling paperwork."

"We know" the director smiled, "but it will be arranged like this; you'll be working with John the last month he's here, so he will teach you all you need to know."

Stephanie's glare was harmless, but Sara knew it meant that she'd made up her mind, and no matter what argument she could come up with, Stephanie would have an answer to it unless Sara flat dismissed taking the position.

"All right, okay." Sara rolled her eyes, but couldn't help smiling. "I can sense you have an answered to whatever I may have to say. Can I at least think about it?"

Her boss snickered. "That's right… we love enthusiasm around here. Of course you can, I'll give you rest of November to think about it, but then I'll need to know your answer."

Sara looked at her watch, and gulped the rest of her coffee, ignoring the burn. "I'm sorry, but I have to go and pick my daughter up from her music lessons."

Stephanie nodded, and rose as she did, walking with her to the door. Once there, she put a hand on her shoulder, "I don't want to pressure you, but I really hope you goner say yes."

"Thank you for the opportunity" Sara said as she left the office.

When Amy and Sara arrived home Sofia was already there. Sara paused for a moment, just to enjoy the sight of her. Sofia had been back in her life for just over three months, and she still was sometimes taken by surprise that she was there again.

"Hi you two" Sofia smiled.

"Hi Sofia" Amy smiled back before disappearing into her room with her backpack and saxophone.

"Hi" Sara said absent-minded.

Sofia frowned, "everything okay?"

"Uh-huh" Sara answered still absent.

"Sara?"

"Oh. Yeah things are fine, I guess. I'm just been offered the position as supervisor for the day shift when John retires."

"You guess" Sofia replied with a chuckle, "Sara, that's great, congrats" she added.

"Er, thanks" Sara quipped, "but I haven't said yes yet."

"Why not?" Sofia asked confused.

"I don't think I want the responsibility that comes along with a position like that, and I'm not really that keen with all the paperwork that it involves" Sara explained.

"Well there's no way around the paperwork" Sofia granted, "but I don't think the responsibility will be much bigger than it already is. You are already tutoring the newbie's. So the way I see it, the only difference will be that instead of just the newest on the team the whole shift will be benefiting from your enormous knowledge in science."

Sara gave her a sweet smile, "that's nice of you to say."

Sofia shrugged and grinned, "I'm actually quite a nice person if you haven't notice."

Sara stuck her tongue out, "oh I have, and very funny at times" she chuckled.

Sofia didn't say anything she just leaned back and laughed.

It had been several weeks since director Douglas' surprising offer, but the back of Sara's mind was still turning the idea over, humbled by the trust implied, while her main attention was taken up by evidence files. Her concentration was finally broken by the knock on her door, and she looked up.

"C..m..in," she said around the pen between her teeth, and Stephanie pushed open the door.

"Break time" Stephanie informed her with almost menacing cheerfulness.

She spat the pen out onto the desk, "okay. What can I do for you?"

"I just want to hear if you have come up with a decision yet" she looked at the papers, photos, and files that covered her desk.

Sara had to chuckle at that, "I thought I had a week more to make that decision."

"Oh, you do" Stephanie assured, "but if you know the answer now then why wait?"

Sara thought for a moment, then gave her a puckish look, "tell you what, if you're willing to make the first three months probation time where I can resign from the position without any question asked, then I'll give you a yes right now."

Stephanie narrowed her eyes and thought for a moment, "deal."

A surprised laugh escaped Sara. Stephanie reached out; she took her hand and shook it, "I'll start the paperwork right away." She paused at the door, "I'm really glad you accepted, Sara, I believe you'll be a great supervisor" she said before leaving.

Sara glared at her computer as it shut down for the day; she shrugged into her jacket, picked up her bag, and made her way out to the hallway. The elevator dropped her swiftly to the garage level, more often than not she would park outside but today lack of space had forced her to use the garage. As she walked down the aisles of parking spaces, mostly empty now, she saw what she wasn't expecting, Sofia leaning against her car.

Sofia straightened as she approached, "hi what are you doing here?" Sara asked.

Sofia unfolded her arms, "um, waiting for you" she chuckled.

Sara's brows rose, "why didn't you just come up?"

Sofia shrugged, "I've only been here a few minutes and thought you probably was about to leave right about now." She let out a breath, "The case we're working on just went major, and they want to make an arrest as soon as possible. It's probably going to be an all-nighter, so I'm not going to make it for dinner. I'm sorry."

"Don't be" Sara's voice was soothing. "It's all right, work is work, and you are talking to the one person who'd understand."

"Yeah, I am, aren't I? I am sorry, though. I wanted to take you and Amy out to dinner to celebrate your promotion."

Sara cocked her head, "how do you know that? I only just accepted three hours ago."

Sofia shrugged with a grin, "guess good news travels fast." She gave Sara a quick hug and pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. "Congrats."

"Uh, thanks" Sara said blushing a bit.

Sofia looked at her watch, "better get back to work. See you, sidle."

"Later, Detective, and good luck with your case."

Sara was lying on the couch just enjoying the stillness when Sofia came in. "hi, are you sleeping?" Sofia asked in a low tone, not to wake her if so.

"Nope" Sara snickered, "just enjoying the silence."

"Oh, where is Amy?" Sofia asked, sitting down on the couch.

"Birthday party at one of her classmates" Sara replied.

Sofia wiggled her brows and gave her a naughty look, "oh, so it's just you and me then."

Sara sent a dirty look back, "yeah, but don't get any good ideas, she'll be home any minute."

As if on cue the door swung open and a smiling Amy came in, "hi mom and Sofia."

"Hi. Sunbeam" Sara replied watching her daughter going into her room with her backpack.

"Hi, Amy" Sofia smiled.

Amy returned shortly after and flopped onto her mother's lap.

"Did you have a good day, sweetie?" Sara asked warmly.

"Mmm" the girl nodded enthusiastically. "School was a bit boring, but the birthday was fun. We played a lot of games, and Mike's mom's has a swimming pool, but we weren't allowed to hop in. They said they couldn't keep an eye on so many children at the same time."

Amy eagerly continued telling about her day. "At first Adam and I didn't get the two mom thing because we once heard Jasmine explain to Carrie how babies are made. But one of Mike's moms' was really cool and didn't mind that we asked about it instead she tried to explain it."

She narrowed her eyes as she tried to remember the explanation, "hmm, it was something about a bank…"

"A sperm bank" Sofia helped along.

Amy looked at Sofia and nodded, "yeah, that's what she called it." She turned her head and looked confused at her mother, "mom, is Uncle Craig Mike's dad?"

Sara furrowed her brows and bit her lip not to laugh, "No, why do you think that?"

Amy shrugged, "because he works in a bank."

Sofia had to look away at that to hide a smile. Sara briefly closed her eyes, this wasn't a conversation she had imagine she would be having with a seven-year-old child. She sighed silently. Amy was nothing if not inquisitive.

Sara cleared her throat, "well sweetie, that's not the same kind of banks, the one Craig works in mostly deals with money. The one Mike's parents went to helps women so they can have a baby."

"Why?"

"Why what?" Sara asked confused.

"Why do they go to a bank instead of just finding a dad?" Amy asked curiously.

"Lots of reasons, I guess. Some women want to have children but without a man in their life. Others like Mike's mother prefer to live with another woman instead of a man, and as you already know two women can't make a baby so they went to the bank to get help. Others use the bank even if they do have a husband because it isn't every man who is capable of making a baby" Sara clarified. "And there are probably lots of other reasons I don't know about."

Amy's eyes searched Sara's face as she tried to understand, "cool" she finally said. Amy cocked an eyebrow, "is Sofia your girlfriend?"

Sofia leaned against the back, observing them quietly. She let out a breath, part amused, part anxious to see where the conversation would go from there.

Sara sputtered and coughed, "why do you think that?" She asked.

Amy shrugged, "I don't know, she is here a lot. Oh, and Adam asked me" she giggled, "He thinks she is."

"Well she isn't" Sara answered truthfully. Honesty compelled her, even as she fought against revealing too much.

But Sara hadn't really thought about how to talk to Amy about it if things between her and Sofia developed, so she decided to take advantage of the topic of the conversation.

"But how would you feel about it if she was?" Sara held her breath, waiting for the girl's reaction.

"Can I still stay with you if she is?" She asked uncertainly.

Sara's forehead wrinkled, "yes of course" She kept staring at Amy, her eyes opening wide as her head tilted to one side, "sweetie, no one can ever take your place in my life. No matter who comes into our life you will always be the most important one to me."

Amy had the head-cocked attitude that meant she was listening carefully. "So you won't go to the bank to get your own child?"

Leaning back, she brushed Amy's hair before moving her hand around her back, "No." Sara said soft but firmly. "Amy, until I meant you I didn't even knew I wanted a child, and when I figured that out, you were the only one I wanted and that will never change" she told her with a soft voice.

"Okay." The girl said relieved. Amy frowned briefly before asking, "Will she be sleeping in your bed?"

Sara gave Sofia an evil glare when a brief chuckle escaped from her. "Um… yes… I guess. Eventually." Sara confessed, feeling a rush of heat flood her cheeks. She stroked the thin arm under her hand and cocked a brow at her daughter, "you don't like the idea of that?"

Amy only smiled and nodded, blissfully unaware of what had cost her mother's surprised reaction, "it's not that I don't know couples sleep together. I'm not a baby, mom, I do know stuff." Amy's eye roll made Sara and Sofia smile. "It's just, I'm use to be the one that wakes you up in the morning."

Sara nodded, relaxing somewhat, "and you're afraid that will change? Let me tell you one thing, no matter who's lying beside me I'll still expect you to come in and wake me up. As a matter of fact I would be very, very disappointed if you didn't. You know…" Sara gave her a warm reassuring smile, "your beautiful face will always be the first thing I want to see when I open my eyes in the morning."

Amy furrowed her brows and continued, "But what if I get sick?"

Sara raised her eyebrows far from following, "what about if you get sick?"

"Can I still sleep beside you if I get sick like I did the last time?"

"Yes of course you can, why do you think you can't?"

Amy briefly gazed at Sofia and then back to her mother and shrugged, "well it's not like Sofia is very big but you actually have a small bed."

Sara let out a laugh, "Sunbeam, if the size of my bed is your only concern to all of this, then we can go out a buy a new bed that's more than big enough to fit all three of us." Sara narrowed her eyes a little, "anything else on your mind while we're at it?"

"No" Amy shook her head, and then she grinned a little. "So, can I tell Adam that Sofia is your girlfriend now?"

Sara shook her head quickly, "no you can't because she isn't. It's a little bit more complicated than that. But tell you what sweetie, if she becomes my girlfriend I promise you'll be the first to know and then you can tell it to whoever you want to, okay?"

Amy nodded; looking pleased, and stood up, "okay mom. Better go do my homework now."

"Sounds like a good idea" Sara smiled.

Amy vanished into her room. A low chuckle escaped Sara as she leaned back, "there are just some conversations I never thought about having when I decided to have a child."

"I bet" Sofia chortled, "but to be fair I think you handled it sensible."

"Thanks" Sara laughed softly, knowing that there was still a question to be answered.

She unfolded her arms, held out one hand; Sofia wrapped her own one around it. Sara closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of Sofia's slender hand that fit so perfectly into her own. It felt good.

Sara sighed, content, and for a little while, she indulged herself in imagining a house hunt with Sofia, trying to find the perfect place for them to share. But somehow it always morphed into her house, and her opening the door to let the blonde in, watching with pleasure as she put her clothes in her closet and her plants in her windows. … Making it her own… The idea distressed her a little; after all, Sofia's home and friends were back in Sacramento. But Sara refused to worry just yet. There were far too many variables still in play, and no need to borrow trouble.

Sofia frowned, and angled her head, "hey are you okay?"

"Yeah" Sara answered opening her eyes. She hesitated, as though about to say something more, then leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek, soft and lingering. "Guess I just got lost in thoughts" she whispered.

Sofia's gaze rose briefly to Sara's lips, and she was tempted, so tempted… but she didn't, instead she just nodded and shot her a warm smile without saying anything.

"What do you want for dinner?" Sara asked a little while later…

**Tbc…**


	23. Chapter 23

_**Chapter 23**_

Sara sighed as she opened another file. She was still annoyed about all the paperwork she had to get use to as a coming supervisor. She tossed the file bag on the desk and grimaced, not at all pleased. Restless, she got up and went into the break room to get herself a cup of coffee; she still had one more hour to kill before her shift was over.

The shift finally came to an end; Sara got into her car and went to her brother's place to pick Amy up. She was greeted by Craig who was busy mowing the lawn.

"Hi Cupcake" he said turning off the lawn mower, "busy day?"

"Boring" Sara growled, "I really hate paperwork."

"Oh. So you prefer people make crimes so you can go out into the field instead" he teased.

Sara just rolled her eyes at that. "I seriously doubt I ever goner get use to spending so much time in an office" she sighed.

"No maybe not" Craig acknowledged, "Guess office work isn't for everyone."

Sara shrugged, "guess time will show" she said.

"But except for that" Craig grinned, "is everything else going fine?"

Sara suspiciously narrowed her brows, "meaning?"

"I've been meaning to ask, how's this 'friendship' thing working out with Sofia?"

Sara felt her face heat a little, and Craig chuckled. "That's what I thought."

She shot him a 'don't push it' look. "We're making it work, so far."

His expression softened. "Good. She's good for you."

Sara stared at her hands. "Craig, what am I doing? Why haven't I just told Sofia yes and… and gotten on with our lives?"

His chuckle was kinder this time, "because you're stubborn as hell. You're trying to prevent a possibility you don't even know is going to happen."

Sara shook her head, "I'm not stubborn just cautious," she protested.

"You're stubborn and scared" her brother said gently. "Sofia already thinks you're wonderful. You're just afraid to let her in, to give her a chance to show you just how much she cares for you, and for Amy. Which is dumb," he added.

"Guess I am scared" she sighed.

"Of course you are," Craig replied, still gentle, "but have you thought about that she's probably as scared as you are knowing how much you will expect from her if you decide to let her in. But still she's here, still willing to take that chance just to be with you if you'll let her."

Sara sighed knowing he was right; Sofia had faithfully stayed in their life without ever pushing.

_So why am I still holding her off? _

"Let me tell you something, Sara," Craig said quietly. I put off loving Ellen for two years because I was scared. And you know what? If I'd known then what I do now, I would have said yes the very first time she asked me out."

Sara's throat was tight, but she could feel the smile forming. "So basically, what you're telling me is to get off my ass, and let her in and love her."

Craig laughed, "Sis, I have seen the way you look at her, and I don't think love is the problem. Trust her enough to give her a chance, Sara. This is me telling you, the guy who used to chase off your would-be boyfriends."

That made her laugh, "Craig, they were six years old!"

"See? I was right, they weren't right for you."

She shook her head. "And she is?"

"I think so, but you're the only one who can decide. Sara, I've met the woman, I've talked with her. If you tell her yes, then she'll treat you and Amy like the most precious thing in the world."

"Okay." She swallowed. "Okay. I'll... think about it."

Craig smiled, "you do that!"

Sara gently squeezed his upper arm as she passed him, "thanks Craig." She went inside to find Amy.

Sara pulled into the parking lot of the diner where she and Amy from time to time ate in the weekends she was working. After eating they went home. They barely made it through the front door before the phone started ringing.

Sara picked up the phone, "Sidle speaking."

"Hi you" Sofia's warm voice sounded. "Tough day?"

"Boring" Sara scowled, "nothing else to do but paperwork." Her voice softens, "how's your day been?"

"Much the same" Sofia snickered, "checked your mail yet?"

Sara frowned, "um no, we don't get mail on Sundays. Why?"

"Silly head" Sofia laughed, "I mean your email."

Amy came running into the kitchen and pulled her mother's sleeve, "mom, come quick."

"Hang on a sec, Sof. What's wrong baby?" Sara asked concerned.

"I found a kitten, come on, mom" Amy replied trying to pull her mother along with her.

"Sof, I have to call you back seems like we have a situation in the garden" she giggled.

"So I could hear" Sofia chortled, "later Sidle, and say hi to Amy for me."

"Will do, later Curtis" Sara snickered as she closed the phone.

"A kitten huh?" Sara smiled.

"Mmm" Amy nodded dragging her mother along with her, "its hiding out in one of the flowerbed."

Slowly not to scare the kitten they went over to the flowerbed. "See" Amy whispered.

Sara kneeled down and bent some of the flowers aside to get a better view. She gently picked it up and looked it over. It wasn't like she had a big knowledge about cats but she estimated the kitten was about eight to ten weeks old. It looked a little rumpled and scruffy but except for that it seemed in good health.

"Mom, can we keep it?" Amy asked in a low hopeful tone.

"No sweetie, we can't. He seems to be in pretty good condition so I'm sure his mother is still around, she is probably just out hunting for food." She gently put the kitten back in the flowerbed.

Amy looked a bit disappointed, "but what if she doesn't come back? And how do you know it's a he?" She asked.

"Because there's an anatomical dissimilarity between male and female" Sara explained. "Sunbeam, I don't want to get your hopes up. So let's just keep an eye at him for the next couple of days and see wants happen, okay?"

"Okay" Amy sighed.

Sara got up, "let's go inside, I don't think his mother is going to come back as long as we stays here."

Amy placed herself in one of the windowsills and kept looking at the flowerbed until it got to dark to see anything and bedtime was met with some dislike but eventually she felt asleep.

Sara turned on her computer curious to find out what it was Sofia had been referring to. It turned out to be an invitation for Jim Brass' fifty-five year old birthday party. After reading the whole invitation she called Sofia as promised.

"Hello again" Sara said as Sofia picked up.

"Hi yourself" Sofia answered, "So did you get yourself a kitten?" She chuckled.

"No! And don't you dare suggesting a thing like that to her" Sara threaten kindly.

"I won't" Sofia laughed, "so gone through your mail yet?"

"Yep" Sara smiled into the receiver, "looks like its party time in Vegas."

"Seems like it, yeah. Are you planning on going?"

"No I don't think so" Sara answered honestly. "Since it's the first weekend in December I was planning on using the time to Christmas decoration the house with Amy" she explained. "What about you, are you going?"

"Oh!" Sofia said trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. "Yeah I think I am he was my old captain and I really would like to see him again, and the rest of the gang, of course" she said, and cleared her throat, a little embarrassed at the faint hoarseness in her voice.

"Of course" Sara said, not really sure about what else to say. "It also gives you a chance to see your mother, isn't she an old friend of Jim?" She pointed out practically.

"Yeah she is. Wouldn't be surprised if she is invited as well" Sofia replied. Both could hear Sofia's cell phone ringing in the background. "Hang on a minute, Sara, I have to answer it."

"Sure" Sara said. She began deleting all the junk mail on her computer while she waited.

"Hi again" Sofia's voice sounded, "have to hang up on you, works calling" she sighed.

"Okay, talk to you later, Sofia."

"Later Sara."

Before going to bed Sara went out into the garden to check up on the kitten and since it still didn't seemed like his mother had been back she wrapped him up in a dishtowel to make sure he at least would stay warm during the night.

When Sara finally made it home from work Laura had already started making dinner and Amy was sitting at the kitchen table doing her homework.

"Hi mom" Amy smiled looking up from her homework. "The kitten is still in the flowerbed, so granny and I gave it some food."

"Hi baby" Sara said returning the smile, "still no sight of his mother?"

"No" Amy replied sadly, "do you think she has forgotten about him?"

"Hi mom, you didn't have to make dinner, you could just have ordered something. No sweetie I don't think she has forgotten him, but something can have happened that prevents her for coming back, or she can have been here while we weren't at home."

"Hi Sara, it's okay, nothing fancy just Macaroni and cheese, and fruit salad."

"No I don't think she has been here, he was very hungry" Amy said.

"Okay, what did you feed him with?"

"We stopped by the pet store and bought some canned food for kittens and a bottle of milk" Laura retorted with a smile.

"Yeah, and mom did you know they make special milk for cats?" Amy exclaimed.

"They do?" Sara asked, she couldn't get herself to tell Amy that she already knew that.

"Mmm" Amy nodded affirmative "their stomach can't tolerate some of the things there is in the milk we drink" she explained.

"Oh" Sara smiled, "so guess you have been learning something new today?"

"Yep" Amy snickered as she closed her books. She went over to the window and watched out for the kitten's mother until it was time to eat.

After eating Amy went outside to make sure the kitten didn't needed anything while Laura and Sara sat down with a cup of coffee.

"What are you thinking about?" Laura asked after watching Sara getting lost in thoughts for awhile.

"Christmas traditions" Sara answered.

Laura looked confused at her daughter, "I don't think I'm following."

Sara shrugged, "almost everyone I know decorates their home the first weekend in December, so I'm wondering if we should be doing it to."

"Sorry dear, but I'm still not following."

"I'm invited to a birthday party in Vegas the first weekend in December which I'm happy to decline to stay home and Christmas decorated with Amy instead. But I guess it got me thinking."

Sara thought a moment, not sure how to explain, "I definitely want us to have various traditions; I'm just not sure I want them on account of what other people does. Originally I was planning on decorating the house the first weekend in December, but now I can't stop wondering if I'm only doing it because everyone else is or I'm doing it because it's a tradition I want us to carry on." Sara raised a brow and looked at her mother, "does any of this even make sense?"

"Actually it does" Laura assured her, "you want you and Amy to have your own traditions regardless to what other people does" Laura said sympathetic. "This doesn't really surprise me if anything it reminds me of your grandmother."

Sara looked at her mother, surprise and relief on her face, "sorry but I don't remember her very well."

"No I guess not" Laura smiled, "but in many ways you resemble her. Just like you she didn't like to do things just because others did it. In my childhood home we always decorated the first Advent Sunday. According to the bible and therefore also to my mother that's the time of expectant waiting and preparation for the celebration of the Nativity of Jesus Christ, which is what Christmas is about, so we always decorated our house that day."

After a long moment of silent Sara finally spoke, "I like that, I really do. For me it makes much more sense to decorate my home on a day with historic meaning instead of just choosing a day because everyone else is doing it."

"Yeah I thought so" Laura giggled, "and I don't think Amy will mind since the first Advent Sunday almost always falls before December." She tilted her head, "so whose birthday are you invited to?"

"Jim Brass, the police captain I've told you about."

"If you want to go I'll be happy to look after Amy. I'm not that much into traditions anyway so I'll just wait with the Christmas decoration then she can help me decorate my place" Laura offered.

"Thanks mom, I'll think about it."

"Isn't Sofia invited? I would think the two of them had worked together."

"Yes of course she's invited" Sara looked confused at her mother, "what makes you think she isn't?"

"Then what's to think about?" Laura's grin was unrepentant and downright wicked, "think it's about damn time the two of you get some alone time away from kids and work" she snickered.

Sara twisted in the chair, slipping her arms around her waist, "mom" she growled.

Laura just laughed, "Sorry kiddo but you're going to Vegas."

Amy came back in and informed how the kitten was doing and to hear if her mother perhaps had changed her mind about letting the kitten come inside, which she hadn't. Shortly after Laura said goodnight and left, Amy got her shower and story before she was tucked in, and finally Sara took a long bath before going to bed herself.

**Tbc…**


	24. Chapter 24

_**Chapter 24**_

Sofia was having a hard time not laughing then she came into the Sidle home, a little black and white kitten was happily playing around on the floor with a just as happy Amy while Sara was sitting at the kitchen table observing them.

Amy looked up when she heard footstep, "Hi Sofia" she said with shining eyes.

"Hi kiddo" Sofia answered as she kneeled down beside her. She gently picked the kitten up and looked at him, "named him yet?"

"Yes, I'm calling him Lucky, because he was lucky that someone found him."

Sofia nodded understanding, "I think that's a fine name for him" she said as she placed the kitten back on the floor and got up. She was still having a hard time not laughing when she sat down at the table opposite Sara, "no kitten, huh?" She mumbled.

Sara slowly took her eyes away from the activity on the floor and gave her a mock-scowl, "did you say anything, dear?" She asked with a low challenging attitude.

Sofia's eyes danced with mirth as she watched Sara leaned back in her chair, "uh-huh… dear…" she flashed her a full grin, "never notice before that there are words you can't say" she momentarily paused, "like… no."

Sara's forehead wrinkled, turning her frown into a full-blown, but befuddled, scowl, "don't remind me."

"Mom!" A worried voice called out behind them, "why is he growling?"

Sara looked at Amy, "he isn't sweetie, he is purring. That's something cats do when they are happy and content" she explained.

"Mom, can we buy a bed for him and some toys?"

Sara glanced at her watch, "not today Amy, it'll have to wait until tomorrow. But why don't you make him one yourself? There are still some empty cardboard boxes in the garage, and you can take one of the old towels to put inside it."

Amy looked skeptically at her mother.

"Want some help, kiddo?" Sofia asked kindly.

"Yes please" Amy nodded.

While Amy and Sofia were making a bed for Lucky, Sara cooked dinner. For once Amy wasn't the easiest girl to get to do her homework, and it took her quite some time to persuade her mother that the best place for Lucky to be sleeping was in her room. Amy exchanged her bedtime story for fifteen minutes of play time with Lucky before Sara tucked her in, but finally both cat and child felt asleep.

"So much for not having pets" Sofia chuckled as Sara plopped down on the couch.

Sara lightly shook her head, "yeah I know, but what else could I do, I couldn't leave him out there to die, which I'm afraid his mother is since she hasn't returned."

"Of course you couldn't." Sofia shrugged, "and yeah if she hasn't been back yet she probably isn't going to." She smiled encouraging, "but personally I don't think growing up with a pet is such a bad thing, it's a good way for kids to learn about responsibility."

"I agree, and I intended to let her get a pet, I just wanted to wait until she was a bit older, and I expected it would be something we had been planning for, so I knew for sure Amy was ready for it." She chuckled softly.

"How pragmatic of you."

"Why, thank you," Sara smiled.

"And I don't think you have to worry about Amy she is quite mature for her age" she told her.

"Guess time will tell" Sara sighed, relaxing back against the couch, pulling Sofia down with her. "What are you doing this Sunday?"

Sofia exhaled into her neck, "probably hanging out here."

"Good" Sara turned to face her, "then you can help decorating the house for Christmas."

Sofia raised her brows, "I didn't think you were going to do that before next weekend."

"I didn't, originally. But I don't like doing things just because others do it. So after talking with my mother, and after she told me about her mother's tradition, I decided I like a historic tradition much better than one simply chosen because other does it." After a moment of silence she added, "So we'll be decorating the house on the first Advent Sunday which is the upcoming Sunday."

"I know" Sofia smiled, "my dad's family is from Europe and for a lot of the countries over there its custom to decorate on that particular day. My mother still does it and so do I" she told.

Sara raised her brows at her, "oh. But if you have the same tradition then shouldn't you be at home decorating your own home instead of being here?" She asked wonderingly.

"Nah, I don't decorate that much anyway." She pointed out.

"Why's that?" Sara gave her the sort of look that questioned her answer.

"For the same reason that you didn't decorate when you lived alone, I suppose." Sofia rubbed her nose against Sara's neck, "I like Christmas and I like decorating for the feast, I just find it a waste of time decorating an empty home, so I rather stay here and help you guys out."

Sara let her arm tighten around her, "you know, we could do both. We could come by your place Saturday and help you decorate and then you can help us on Sunday." She tilted her head and smiled, "I'm positive that Amy doesn't mind decorating two houses."

"I guess we could do that." Sofia smiled with genuine pleasure.

"Good. You think about it." Sara smiled, satisfied for the moment.

Both felt into silence for a while. Sofia was wondering if it meant that Sara might was considering changing her mind about attending Jim's birthday. She wanted to ask but she didn't want to push. Slowly she lifted her head and looked at Sara.

"I am." Sara said, answering the unasked question. "Mom has already volunteered to look after Amy that weekend."

A rosy blush stained Sofia's face for a moment, "good" she sighed contented as she lay back down, wondering how Sara could read her so easily.

A little gasp escaped Sofia as she moved to lie in a better position. Cautiously, Sara shifted her position and laid a hand on the small of Sofia's back, rubbing lightly at the taut muscles. She made a small gasping noise, but didn't protest, so Sara started rubbing with both hands.

Sofia said nothing, only whimpering slightly when Sara's thumbs dug into the dents along her spine, but Sara figured that if she wanted her to stop she would speak up. Gradually the knots loosened, and eventually, Sofia sighed and slowly relaxed, reaching back to halt the hand still stroking her back. "Thanks," she said thickly.

Sara just brushed her hair off her forehead, "Better?" She asked quietly.

Sofia sighed again, and smiled. "Much. The endorphins are kicking in. How'd you know to do all that? Ex-boy/girlfriend?"

Sara shook her head, and stroked her hair again, "No. it was offered as an elective subject when I went to Berkeley."

Sofia snickered weakly. Tentatively Sara reached down and placed a hand on her abdomen. Recalling more of her lessons, Sara started rubbing again, with the lightest pressure she could manage. Sofia grunted and tensed, but then relaxed again under her touch. When she stopped, Sofia was as limp as a noodle, and… she judged… almost three-quarters asleep. Sara settled her head and shoulders more comfortably, and began stroking her hair once more.

After driving Amy to school Sara went by her mothers' to deliver Amy's weekend bag, they had a quick cup of coffee but Sara soon left for home. They had made plans for Sofia to pick her up at half past ten and then drive them to the airport so they'd be there with time to spare. She took her time in the shower, relaxing under the hot stream of water before drying off and dressing with some care. She put on a nice pair of pants and then opened her dresser drawer and stared at the light pink sweater set she had purchased a couple of months earlier. The tags were still on.

It was such a…a _mom _thing to wear. Sara's wardrobe hadn't changed all too much since adopting Amy, but she had made a conscious effort to not dress like a college student. She was well into her thirties, a mother, and with a girlfriend to be, _maybe_, and close around her own age. Looking like a twenty-five year old was not a priority.

She slipped on the sweater set, lifting her hair out of the collar, and then checked her reflection in the mirror, frowning at what she saw. It just…wasn't her.

Sara tugged off the cardigan before going into her closet and pulling out a sleek brown leather jacket. She slipped it on and smiled in the mirror. The pink of the soft cashmere T-shirt contrasted nicely with the chocolate brown of the leather, giving her the best of both worlds. She was a mom, but she was still herself.

Not long after, Sara dimly heard the front door open and Sofia call out her name. "Time to leave, Sara."

"Be there in a second" Sara said.

The drive to the airport was pleasant. They boarded the plane at time and the ride passed without fanfare. Their plane touched down at one forty-five in the afternoon. They went to fetch their luggage at the baggage carousel, and watched black suitcase after black suitcase pass them by.

"I wonder if they lost ours," Sara murmured.

"I see yours… wait, nope. Not it," Sofia sighed.

"I'm buying us hot neon yellow luggage for our next trip." Sara growled in a low tone.

Sofia would have laughed at the thought of Sara toting a yellow carryon bag, but the mention of a future trip had her pulse racing.

They collected their baggage. Sara gripped both of their bags and nodded in the direction of the car rental lot. The long line had Sofia fidgeting. "I'm so going to be late for lunch with my mother" she sighed.

"Why don't you take a cab? Then I'll rent a car and check in." Sara said, turning to face her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it's okay," Sara said, looking at the rental lot. "Let's get you a taxi."

Before Sofia could utter a word, Sara had found her a cab. Sofia exhaled loudly and opened the car door. As she bent to step in, Sofia felt a hand grip her elbow and hold her back.

"Two single rooms or a suite?" Sara asked hesitantly.

Sofia blinked and then jumped in surprise as the cab driver beeped. "Just choose the cheapest solution" she said climbing into the cab.

Sara didn't bother with all the logical arguments about making it a luxurious mini vacation and the fact that she had plenty of money for it, "okay I'll figure it out" she smiled. "Say hey to your mother."

Sofia left her mothers' house three hours later; she reached for her cell phone as she got into a taxi.

Sara answered her phone on the first ring. "Hi."

"Hey," she said warmly. "What hotel are we at?" She knew it was silly but it made her stomach flip to use the word "we."

"Bellagio… top floor."

"Sara…" Sofia said. Her nerves were getting to her, and could be heard in her voice. "That's not exactly cheap."

"Sofia, just get your butt over here when you are done at your mothers'" Sara smirked. "See you in a little while."

"See you in a few minutes" Sofia said closing her phone.

Sofia rubbed her sweaty palms on her hips and knocked. Footsteps could be heard on the other side of the door. "Hi" she said as the door swung open.

"Hi" Sara stepped aside to let her into the small living area. "How's your mother?"

"She's fine thank you." Sofia took a deep breath and could feel herself beginning to relax. "Have you eating after arriving? Or did you just hang out and watch pay-per-view porn?" She snickered.

Sara's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. "I…I was checking out the balcony. Our room is facing west, so we have a great view. I think we are going to be able to see a beautiful sunset."

Sofia walked through the open door to the bedroom. She kept walking until she reached the sliding door. The sun was slowly going down, and the sky was a fading symphony of colors over the city of Las Vegas. "It's a nice view," she said as she stepped into the fresh air. She slipped off her suit jacket and put it on a patio chair before sitting down.

Sara skirted around the patio table and sat down opposite Sofia, "mmm" she smiled, "but I almost forgot how warm Vegas are."

"Yeah" Sofia smiled back, "and in about two hours there's probably too cold to be sitting outside."

"Desert" Sara chortled. "By the way, Greg called earlier to hear if we want to meet the team and Brass for dinner tonight. I said yes so he could make a reservation. You don't have to if you don't want to," Sara shrugged, "just, better safe than sorry."

"I want to" Sofia said, cracking a small smile, "when are we meting them?"

Sara looked at her watch, "in about an hour, Greg would make an early reservation since some of them have to work tonight."

"Okay" Sofia got up, "just goner take a quick shower" she said and bolted for the bathroom.

Within half an hour Sofia were redressed and ready to leave. They met Brass and the team in a little bistro not too far away from the Strip.

Brass insisted on bestowing a hug on Sofia and a kiss on Sara's cheek, which Sara took in good part and Sofia allowed; Nick and Greg contented themselves with hugs after Sara's glare dissuaded them from kissing her."So good to see you two again," Catherine said cheerfully, settling back in her seat next to Grissom. "You both look good."

"Thanks Cath, so do you guys" Sara smiled. She looked at Brass, "so ready for the big day tomorrow?"

It amused her no end to watch Brass' eyebrows slowly go up, "now I am, since my two favorite girls are back in town" he laughed softly. "How long are you staying?" He asked in a more normal tone; as Nick moved a little making room for Greg.

"Just for the weekend" Sofia and Sara chorused in union, making Nick laugh.

"So how long have you two been together?" Catherine asked.

Giving a non-committal shrug Sofia quickly gazed down at her plate feeling her cheeks blush.

Sara looked at Catherine with coolness she far from felt, "what do you mean?" She answered the question with a question.

"Where? How? When did the two of you bump into each other again?" Catherine said with some confusion.

"Oh" Sofia mumbled before shortly telling about the case that had lead to their meeting.

Rest of dinner went on in a good atmosphere and a lot of small talking about what each had been up to since the last time they'd been together. After coffee and dessert Brass, Greg and Nick said goodnight and left for work.

Brass, ever observant, noted Grissom's tension, "talk to her" he whispered to his friend before leaving the bistro.

Sara got up and left for the restroom, when she returned Grissom had moved and was now sitting at the bar, he nodded for her to come join him so she went over and sat down on the stool beside him.

"It's true what Catherine said, you really do look great" Grissom tilted his head in the old familiar manner, and for some reason it made her throat swell a little.

Sara glanced down. "Um, thanks."

"Frisco must suit you," he offered, and she looked up again, pleased.

"It does," and her dimples appeared. "How are you doing?"

"Same old I guess," Grissom chuckled. His face softened, "I still miss you, Sara" he confessed in a low voice, placing his hand on top of hers.

Out of the corner of her eye Sofia watch Grissom placing his hand on Sara's. The sight made her wince a little. Catherine gave her a puzzled look before she started chuckling softly. Catherine's chuckle made Sofia look back at the older woman.

"What?" Sofia asked giving Catherine an odd look.

"Up until now I just had a suspicion to why you left so suddenly" she said watching Sofia closely, "but I think my suspicion just has been confirmed."

"And what exactly do you think was the reasons for my disappearance, Cath?" Sofia dropped her head, before turning to look at her curiously.

Catherine resisted the urge to laugh, "Uh, I don't know, Sofia. What about shattered dreams when it was announced those two" she nodded towards the bar, "was a couple."

Sofia shook her head, "beats me why people think I had a crush on Grissom" she said with asperity, and then softened her tone, "believe what you want, Cath, but he wasn't the reason why I left."

"Can't really say what other people think, but I wasn't referring to Gil, I meant Sara." Catherine stared at Sofia intently.

Returning Catherine's look, Sofia wondered how to defuse the situation. "Ah… um… well…" She gave her an embarrassing shrug before turning back to her coffee.

Seeing the younger woman's discomfort, Catherine gave her a friendly smile and shrugged, "have you told her?"

"What?" Sofia sputtered, grabbing a napkin.

"That sounds something like a 'no'," Catherine said, casting a look out in Sara's direction.

"She knows! It's just complicated. Can we talk about something else?" Sofia asked, feeling the blush creeping up her cheeks.

"Of course we can. If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. But…" Catherine said a touch of hesitation in her voice, "for what it's worth, I think you are a much better match for her than Gil can ever be. You are really smart. Have a great sense of humor. And can be a big flirt," she added, raising an eyebrow teasingly. "Everything a girl like Sara needs, really."

"Thanks, I guess" Sofia snickered. "I just hope she realize that someday" she pointed out hopefully.

"Get use to it. Nothing that involves Sara is ever easy or happens fast" Catherine teased in a light tone.

"You don't say!" Sofia said in an amused voice.

Catherine glanced at her watch, "I guess I should head home," she said after she finished her coffee. "See you tomorrow night."

After watching Sara and Grissom covertly for a few minutes Sofia decided not to disturb them, she went outside, and since the weather was still warm she decided to walk back to the hotel.

It felt odd feeling Grissom's hand again but Sara didn't remove her hand.

"Yeah, I have days like that too," Sara sighed; only half-joking and he smiled. "But I gave you an ultimatum when I came back for Warrick's funeral." Sara bit her lip, looking down to avoid his eyes, "I told you I wasn't going to come back to Vegas, and I told you why."

He nodded slowly, "I know." Grissom shifted in his seat, and they settled into semi-uncomfortable silence. "Do you miss it?" Grissom set down his glass. "Us, I mean."

Sara narrowed her eyes a little, trying to put things into words, "some of it, yeah."

A small lump formed in her throat at the thought of the friends she'd left behind in Vegas; normally she didn't let herself remember how much she missed them all despite their e-mails and phone calls.

She shrugged off the melancholy, "The first six months or so was the worst I missed all of you guys terribly. But over the years a lot of things have fallen into place in my life and I'm really happy with the way my life is heading. I will never regret that I came to Vegas, just like I never will regret leaving again. I loved a lot of things here, but for now and probably for the rest of my life my home will be in Frisco."

"Yeah, you surely look happier than I remember ever seeing you before, so guess it wouldn't be fair asking you to move back here" Grissom said contritely.

"It doesn't really matter 'cause the answer is no." She said a small smile forming as she shook her head lightly.

"You had your chance to be with me, Gil, I asked almost begged you to come and stay with me in Frisco or anywhere else than Vegas. But I guess I wasn't worth leaving Vegas for" she said, the pain evident to both of them.

"Eventually I gave up waiting for you and decided going on with my life and I'm not about to give that up. Not for you anymore and certainly not for Vegas" she admitted.

The implications of her statement jarred him. "But you are willing to give it up for someone?"

"Yes" Sara said after some hesitation, she gazed around, "where the hell is Sofia?"

"Could you be a bit more specific?" He asked with an honest curiosity. "I think she left about the same time as Catherine" he said, darting his eyes between her and the now empty table.

Sara shook her head, a sad smile forming. "No. Sorry but I think there is one who's entitled to hear it before you." She got up, "better get back to the hotel. I'm not sure if Sofia has a key to the suite." She gave Grissom a brief hug, "see you tomorrow" she smiled and left the bistro.

Grissom just sat there and watched her leave the bistro. And his life, period.

**Tbc…**


	25. Chapter 25

_**Chapter 25 **_

It wasn't until Sofia reached the hotel she remembered that she hadn't brought a key card with her. After debating with herself she decided to go upstairs to see if Sara had returned, before trying to get someone from the reception to let her in. The door opened without a sound she went inside and found Sara sitting out on the balcony.

"Hi" Sofia said with a low voice not sure if Sara had heard her come in.

"Hi" Sara watched her quietly for a moment, "you left without a word" she said, giving her an emotional look.

"Sorry" Sofia began with an embarrassed shoulder shrug, "you two just looked like you had some personal things to talk about so I didn't wanted to bother you."

"Er, no not really." Sara bit her lip. "Um, I'm not sure how to put this."

For an instant, Sara saw straight into Sofia, to a terrible hurt, a returning despair, and then it was gone, hidden under a mask without expression. "You don't have to," she said flatly, and turned and began to stride away.

"No! You do not get to walk away from me again."

Sofia didn't stop, but she wasn't running, and within a few seconds Sara was in front of her, blocking her path. Sofia halted, jaw clenched. Sara put a hand on her arm before she could explode. "Geez, Sofia, give me a chance to say something!"

Sofia almost shrank from her touch, staring at her bleakly. "What do you want to say?"

"That you're an idiot? That what you are assuming right now is wrong and hurts?" Sara offered, close to tears or laughter or yelling, she couldn't tell which.

"Sofia, I was trying to tell you that you are the one I want, the one I want in my life, the one I want to be with. If you want to, I mean…"

Sara closed the gap between them, and Sofia wrapped her arms around her happily, still incredulous. For just a second Sara returned her hug, sighing against her ear, and then she put one hand on the back of her head and caught the blondes mouth with hers, and with a rush of stunned joy Sofia realized that Sara had made up her mind.

Sara was so warm and alive and hers, hers, …she wanted to fold her into herself, she wanted to kneel at her feet, she wanted to tell Sara how much she meant to her, but she couldn't bear to pull away for an instant.

Sofia managed to lift a hand to the brunettes face once more. "Sara, are you sure?"

Sara's chuckle was half-choked. "I always was, Sof, I just had to convince myself." She blinked. "That didn't make any sense, did it?"

Sofia laughed again, stroking her cheek, still trying to take in the fact that her wildest dream had come true. "Yes it did. Sara, Sara…" She stretched her head just slightly to kiss her again.

"Why now? What changed?" Sofia asked a while later, as they sat out on the balcony and watched the stars come out. Her expression was still exalted, but now puzzlement was there too.

Sara laughed. Sofia's arm was warm around her waist, "because, while Grissom was trying to ask me to come back, all I could think about was you…"

Sofia turned her gaze to the sky. Sara did the same and sighed. "There's so much out there."

The universe looked limitless, full of wonder and possibilities. It was hard for Sara to believe she was looking at the same sky that had seemed so heavy over her head years earlier. Sofia reached out a hand and tentatively placed in on Sara's back, letting it slip down to her waist as she inched closer to her side.

Their bodies came into contact, grazing each other lightly. It shouldn't have made Sara's pulse race, but it did. Her arm snaked around Sofia's back and she rested a hand between her shoulder blades.

"Talking to him only confirmed what I already knew, but it also made me realize, that you are the one I'm in love with" she said softly.

"You are in love with me?" Sofia's voice was warm with humor and happiness, and Sara grinned.

"You have an objection?"

For answer Sofia touched Sara's chin, turning her head to meet hers in yet another warm, sweet kiss. Sara moaned softly against Sofia's lips, blessed out by the sheer joy of it.

Years_,_ Sofia had dreamed of this, and now it was hers, and she banished doubt sternly to the back of her mind. She had Sara, and even though she knew she had accomplished great things already, it felt like her life was just getting started.

Eventually Sofia sighed content, "no objection, I'm in love with you too."

"Really," Sara answered in all seriousness. She got up and pulled the blonde with her.

She took her in her arms, running her hands tenderly over her back. Once she rested her arms on her shoulders, she bent forward, first brushing her lips lightly against hers, and then capturing them in a long kiss. One kiss merged into a second and a third.

They came up for air, and Sara quickly dipped in again, this time using her tongue to part her lips. Sliding her hands downward, she cupped Sofia's rear, kneading the flesh and pulling her nearer against her.

Sofia groaned in response when Sara drew her head closer, her tongue eagerly fencing with her own. Hands roamed freely, exploring, teasing and arousing.

When they parted again, Sara stepped back, taking Sofia's hand in hers and heading to the bedroom. She let go as they crossed the sliding door, moving to the window to arrange the blinds so a bit of natural light bathed the room. Stopping by the bed, she pulled back the covers, and kicking off her shoes.

Turning around, Sara gave her head a shake when she found Sofia starting to undress. Capturing her hands in hers, she leaned forward to kiss her. Slowly she walked the blonde backwards to the wall, pinning her against it with a playful grin. Letting go of her hands, Sara buried her face against her neck.

Moaning, Sofia twisted her head to allow Sara's roaming lips better access to her sensitive flesh. Sara felt Sofia's fingers on her skin, pushing up her shirt, and she leaned back and raised her arms so the blonde could rid her of it. Then Sofia's back was again against the wall, Sofia rolled her head back against the plaster, bracing her hands on Sara's shoulders.

"So beautiful," Sara said, her voice vibrating against Sofia's breastbone. Sofia's chuckle turned into a gasp when Sara's mouth covered a nipple through the fabric.

Sara stepped back, her breathing ragged as she stared into Sofia's eyes. She took her hands in hers, lovingly guiding her to the bed. Stopping before it, she kissed her gently for a long time, deliberately slowing their pace. After a while, her hand drifted to her shoulder, pushing the material aside and running her tongue from her neck to the edge of her bra strap, then followed it downward until she encountered her shirt.

Sara glanced at her, thrilled to see Sofia's eyes closed in pleasure. She started kissing her way upward, all the while working her hand under her shirt. By the time she reached her lips, she was caressing her through her bra, delighting in the mews of pleasure she made. Enjoying herself, she made no move to stop Sofia as she forced her own shirt down her shoulders, pausing only long enough to let her slip it off.

Sara undid her bra clasp as Sofia's lips ran over her chest, closing her eyes as she sighed. Sofia's skin was hot under her palms, and Sara felt the slickness growing between her thighs. Running her hands under the lacy material, she began to knead her breasts softly, occasionally allowing her thumbs to rub over her nipples. When Sofia moved her hands to her pants, she stepped back, again shaking her head and smiling kindly.

Sara slipped her bra off along with her own, tossing it to the floor while she told Sofia how beautiful she was between passionate kisses. Her hands trailed down her sides, and she undid her jeans, quickly discarding both those and her panties. "So beautiful," she repeated, kneeling in front of her and kissing her stomach.

"Sara" Sofia cried, her fingers tangling in her hair. "I want you."

"In time," Sara answered, leaning back to wink at her.

Sara began to kiss her legs, starting above her knee and slowly dragging her tongue inward, leisurely pausing here and there to nip the flesh softly. Her hands moved over and around the blonde's thighs, coming teasingly close but never touching her intimately. Sofia's moans further aroused her, and she used one hand to undo her own pants and panties. As Sara's lips approached Sofia's center, she suddenly stopped and began the motion on her other leg, chuckling softly into her skin when Sofia swore loudly.

Gradually making her way upward again, Sara's hands actively joined the fray, running teasingly through the short curling hair that marked her destination. Her fingers parted the blonde's folds as her lips approached, and she turned her head to blow on the hot flesh. Sofia was squirming, her hands trying to drag Sara's head closer, but she resisted, using her fingers to gently arouse her.

When Sara dipped her head in suddenly, Sofia cried out as the brunettes tongue ran the length of her slit, and she arched under her. Sara repeated the motion, pressing harder so her tongue entered her partially. The third time had Sofia calling out her name, pleading by the fourth. Resting her legs on her shoulders, she ran her tongue deeply in her, savoring her taste. Sara began moving her tongue in and out, starting with a slow pace that fast quickened.

Sofia was close, and Sara withdrew her tongue. Sofia's moans of disappointment changed into a groan of pleasure as first one then two fingers started moving in her and Sara's mouth closed over her clitoris. Sofia bucked as Sara drove her to a climax, but she kept up with her, never quitting until the muscle spasms around her fingers faded.

After a few minutes of heavily breathing Sofia flipped them around and straddled Sara to the mattress. The minute Sofia's mouth slipped over Sara's a soft duet of muffled moans echoed in the bedroom. Sara felt as if a cannonball had hit her stomach, leaving her breathless. Sofia's lips were soft, and tender and hot. Her tongue slid around in her mouth and Sara groaned again, feeling her nipples flush hard. Sofia kissed the curve where Sara's neck met her shoulder.

Sofia thumb slid along the slope down to the inside of Sara's thighs, and a slow wave of pleasure ran through Sara, astonishing her. Sara didn't open her eyes, but judging from the shift of weight Sofia had moved further down the bed.

Sofia mouth left the brunette's breasts to explore the smoothness of her stomach, leaving her riding yet another crest, and then moved south. The touch of Sofia's fingers on her cleft made her jerk, and when she slid two inside her Sara moaned loudly. Sofia's stroke between her legs was building up her tension, and when the blonde's hand on her hip dropped to touch her clitoris she gasped and twisted up against her.

Sofia inhaled deeply, and Sara felt enveloped by her, the blonde's body half-curled along hers, her scent in her nose. Sofia's thrusts grew stronger, and Sara felt her toes curling, her muscles stiffening; then the ecstasy flooded her.

The soft swipe of Sofia's tongue did her in completely. She cried out, and the pleasure went on and on as Sofia caressed her, until she just faded into a blissful darkness.

Sara slowly opened her eyes and turned heavily in Sofia's arms. Lying on top of her, she began to kiss her breasts, lavishing them with the attention she denied them earlier. Sofia rolled her head and moved under her. Taking Sofia's hands, Sara pinned them on the bed, settling herself at one of the blonde's legs while pressing her own leg against Sofia's sex. Her breath came raggedly, as Sara slowly began rocking.

Sofia arched under her, urging her to continue, and Sara kept rocking, thrusting hard and quickly. Sweat dripped from her forehead as Sara captured Sofia's lips and kissed her wildly, her tongue ravishing her mouth. Sara let go off the blonde's hands to caress her body, and Sofia moved them down Sara's back, grabbing her hips and pressed her harder against her leg.

Sara moved frantically, sliding up and down at a faster pace. When Sofia's moans became more intense, Sara realized she was close again, and she moved a hand to her clitoris, adding to her stimulation. When the blonde called her name, bowing up to her, she rocked even harder, her orgasm quickly following Sofia's.

Eventually Sara rolled to her side, shifting their bodies under the covers. Sofia's contented smile as she held her close touched her more than she ever imagined, and Sara gladly fell asleep using Sofia's chest as a pillow.

Sofia was the first to wake up, after watching Sara for awhile she got up and headed for the bathroom. When she emerged, she was wearing a top and slacks. Not sure about using room service she went downstairs to get them some coffee. The short trip was long enough to let doubt in; she began to wonder how large a part coming to Vegas had played in Sara's decision the evening before, and just how awkward it could end up being if Sara suddenly had changed her mind.

Sofia slowly went into the bedroom and over to the bed. She had just enough time to set down the cup on the small table by the bed before her arms were filled with Sara.

Awkwardness wasn't even a question, and Sofia abandoned worry as she felt Sara's hands slide into her hair and her lips land on hers. The kiss was warm and enthusiastic, a delighted sharing; by the time they pulled apart, her confidence had returned. "Good morning to you too," Sofia said a little breathless.

"Good morning" Sara said, and gave Sofia one more quick kiss before pulling away and picking up the cup. "Ooh, thanks."

Sara sat back on the bed and smiled over the rim of the cup. Sofia stuck her hands in her pockets, suddenly both amused and shy. "I can't quite believe this is real," she commented.

Sara snorted. "Join the club," she said dryly, and put the cup down on the nightstand, patting the bedspread beside her with her other hand. Sofia walked over and sat down, hooking one knee up onto the mattress to face her.

But Sara surprised her, sliding closer and with a twist of her hips she pushed Sofia down on the mattress, and then she put her head on her shoulder and burrowed close. Touched, Sofia held her tightly, suddenly knowing with the insight that Sara sometimes had into her thoughts that she wasn't as confident as she appeared… that she needed reassurance as much as she, if not more.

Sara pulled her a little closer, and they were still for a while, just absorbing. It felt so good, Sara thought, to hold Sofia at last without reservations; so good to savor the press of her body against her own, the way her head fitted so neatly beneath her jaw when she bent her neck_._

_How could I have ignored this need? How could I have pretended it didn't matter? _

Well, regrets were useless, as her mother would have pointed out. The best thing she could do now was make it up to Sofia with all that was within her power. Sofia had waited so patiently for her to come around, there was no way she was going to waste it.

After a while Sofia sighed, and pushed away enough to look at her, but before she could speak Sara captured her lips with her own, trying to put as much of her thoughts and feelings into the kiss as possible. Sofia made that soft little sound again, the one that stirred both Sara's heart and her groin, and let her kiss her.

When Sara broke it Sofia was smiling, a small dreamy smile that mixed smugness and bliss. "I love your lips on mine," she remarked before opening her eyes.

"Why, thank you, Ms. Curtis," Sara deadpanned, then cocked her head to consider her at close range. "Are you hungry?"

Sofia smiled, "yeah I could eat, what about you?"

"I could eat." Sara let her go and rose, holding out a hand to help her stand. "Just need a quick shower. You can order something while I get dressed or we can go out."

"Let's go out" Sofia smiled, "think I know a place you'll like."

They drove up and parked in front of the local Waffle World. It was a quiet meal, with Sara mostly talking about work and Amy and Sofia telling her a little more about her mother and brother. Nothing unusual for them, except that their hands kept linking somehow, creeping across the table while they weren't paying attention. Sofia found herself losing her train of thought on occasion as she just watched Sara, disbelief and triumph dueling behind her eyes. Judging from the dazed little smile that kept flitting across Sara's face, Sofia wasn't alone in wonderment.

Sofia watched Sara as she pulled bills from her wallet for the check, it was a strange feeling to realize that if she wanted to reach out and hold one of the brunette's hands, she could, with no barriers or mixed signals to worry about.

In a way, it was tremendously freeing to have made her decision.

_Craig and mom were right. The real reason I was holding back was me._

Sofia had brought doubts with her when she'd stumbled back into her life, but she'd proven herself several times over since.

_Now… it's time to prove us!_

Sofia pulled her arm through hers as they left the restaurant, even though the car was mere yards away, and Sara found herself grinning a little foolishly. "Careful, Sof, or I might think you're feeling possessive," she teased lightly.

"A detectives motto is to protect and serve" Sofia glanced over at her, lips twitching. "Is that a bad thing?"

"Not as long as I get equal time."

Sofia unlocked the car, and opened the passenger door for her. "Feel free to possess me whenever you like," she said with a grin, handing her into the seat and making her laugh.

"Let's drive to Lake Mead and just spend a couple of hours enjoying the great weather" Sara suggested.

"Sure" Sofia smiled, soon after they were on the road heading towards the Lake.

They didn't go to one of the public places instead they found a place all to themselves. Sara had accidentally stumbled over the spot in one of her many trips to the Lake whenever she had wanted to get away from the city. It had soon become her favorite spot, mostly because it seemed like no one else knew about it so she always had it to herself.

After scanning the surroundings Sara concluded that it was still the case, so she took the rug lying in the car and nodded for Sofia to bring the bottles with water. She spread out the rug near the water's edge and sat down closely followed by Sofia.

Sofia was lying on the back, Sara on her side she let her gaze travel down the blondes supine form appreciatively, followed by a lazily hand. Sara's hand slowly went from the blondes breasts and further down between her legs. "Comfortable?"

Sofia placed her hand on top of hers, "Sara, you are getting me quite aroused here. And it's not that I don't like it but someone could walk by at any moment."

Sara looked around, "I guess but all the time I've been coming here I never seen a single soul, but if it makes you uncomfortable I'll stop" she assured her.

Sofia licked her lips and looked up at her, "no" she said as she pulled Sara down on top of her, "I don't live here anymore, so I can't really care if someone sees us" she wriggled her hips, shooting a look at her through her lowered lashes.

Sara bent down until her warm mouth lightly brushed the blondes. She pushed herself up and casually, she began to unbutton her shirt, giving Sofia a wink.

Sofia wanted to laugh, but the sight of the brunette's bare upper body stopped her. Sara dropped the shirt in the sand and leaned over her, one slender hand next to each hip.

Sofia shuddered. Sara bent her head and kissed across Sofia's tight stomach. Sofia gasped loudly, squirming under Sara's warm mouth. Sara settled her elbows on either side of Sofia's waist and pushed her top further up, and let her hot tongue slide in long even strokes along her stomach.

Sofia was starting to pant, her entire body tense against the sensual torment being inflicted on her. Sara hummed against her wet skin happily. Sofia choked a sob. Every nerve throughout her torso was on fire now, the heat rolling in waves down her stomach to build in the valley between her thighs.

Sara got up and leaned over, hands braced on the rug as she looked down into Sofia's face. Their gazes locked in a long steamy stare that spoke volumes. Sofia arched up and let her gaze drop through her lashes.

Sara drew back and licked her lips, looking pleased and frighteningly intense. Catlike, Sara ran long fingers down Sofia's body and pulled her slacks and panties off in the movement.

Sara shucked her way out of her own close, letting them drop to the sand then moved to the edge of the rug, gazing up Sofia's prone body.

Sofia raised her head, seeing herself and Sara at her feet letting her lust-filled gaze burn into her skin. She groaned, and brought her knees together, but the brunette shook her head.

"Too late to be shy, babe …I want to see…" Sara told her, stroking her legs with her thumbs. The intensity of Sara's gaze made Sofia's skin hot, made the fire in her belly flare up.

"Sweet, oh god yes…" Sara dropped down on all fours and let her teeth nip her knee, her hot breath on the bare skin. "Show it to me. You want to, I can tell, Sofia…"

She did, Sofia realized dimly. With slow grace, she let her knees slide apart, and bent them, letting her thighs open under Sara's eyes. She licked the sensitive skin at the top of her thigh, leaving the flesh wet from her mouth.

You're wet, babe. I can smell you. Hot for me?"

"Yes…" Sofia groaned as the brunette's mouth nipped at her hipbone. Sara was teasing her by kissing her hips, her belly, circling around the thatch of fur just under her chin, her words muffled on her hungry skin.

"You want me to kiss it, don't you? You're dying for me to slide my tongue all over your hot little pink bud, wouldn't care who watched us…"

Sa…ra…" Sofia called breathlessly. Sara laughed a husky sound in her throat.

"Your turn. Beg me, Sofia. Tell me exactly what you want," Sara ordered roughly. Sofia gave a sound between a sob and a laugh, feeling the coarse words spill from her throat.

"Eat me, Sidle! I want your mouth on my pussy and I want you to eat me!"

"Oh my, such language. You kiss me with that mouth?" Sara teased. Sofia growled.

"SARA!"

With a delicate flick, Sara slid her hot tongue into her; Sofia arched up, biting her lips in sheer delight. The brunette lapped a few times and pulled back.

"Enough?"

"No! More, Sara, more!"

Swiftly Sara shifted forward, pressing two fingers between the tight folds of her sex. Roughly Sara thrust forward, hard. Her fingers slid slickly into the tightness with a squelching sound and Sofia wailed at Sara's first stroke. The brunette thrust hard and fast, Sofia wrapped her legs high around Sara's back, tightening them as she opened her mouth, breathing hard.

"Sara, please harder, I can take it, yes, give it to me… hard" Sofia growled at her.

Sara dropped her face to Sofia's, teeth clamping on her lower lip as she thrust harder and faster deep inside her, her body pinning the blonde's completely. Sofia cried out while Sara's strokes took her over the edge, she bucked against Sara as she climaxed hard and wild. Sweetly, Sara kissed Sofia's face, murmuring soft words before rolled off of her, pulling her close.

"Oh Jesus!" Sofia moaned softly into Sara's ear, "that was hot, honey."

"It wasn't too much?" Sara asked hesitantly, "I mean with the talking."

Sofia rolled around so she was facing Sara, "hell no" she giggled exhaustedly into her hair. "But I must admit it sounded like something you have said before."

Sara blushed but didn't say anything.

"Sara?"

"I have, but never out loud" Sara admitted blushing even more.

"I think that needs explanation" Sofia smiled.

"Um… yeah… okay" Sara stammered. "Like I told you, when I lived in Vegas I often drove out here when I wanted to be alone. And almost as often you were the one that ended up being on my mind it always made things better thinking of you" Sara said in a soft voice. "And sometimes" her face dark red now, "the thoughts wasn't so innocent."

Sofia lifted her hand and brushed some sand off Sara's cheek, "so basically we have just lived out one of your sex fantasies" she concluded with a smile.

"Yes… I guess we have" Sara admitted shyly.

"So did the real thing live up to your fantasy?" Sofia asked curiously.

"No" Sara lightly shook her head, "it was much better than my fantasy could provide."

"Good." Sofia pressed Sara down on her back and placed herself on top of her. "And want do I do to you in your fantasy?" She asked.

Sara gently cupped Sofia's face, "honestly I can't tell the fantasy is never about me, only about satisfying you."

"Hmm, guess I'll just have to improvise then" she said letting her lips roaming over Sara's.

Sara didn't protest to that and soon after her groaning and heavily breathing was all that was heard for a long time.

**Tbc… **


	26. Chapter 26

_**Chapter 26**_

It was in the middle of the afternoon when they returned back to Vegas, Sara pulled into an empty parking space. They had decided to take a walk down the Strip to see if they could find a placed to get a late lunch.

Even if they both had been take a short swim before leaving the Lake they were slightly sticky with a mixture of sand and sweat, and Sara's hair was thoroughly tangled, but she simply couldn't bring herself to care.

"We so look like tourists" Sara laughing declared, hooking her arm through Sofia's again.

"Yep" Sofia laughed guiding them down the Strip. "Are you hungry or do you want to play tourist?"

"Starving" Sara smiled. "What are you hungry for?"

Sofia looked her over and wiggled her brows, "you're choice" she grinned.

Sara looked at the array of eateries available down the Strip, "Are you sure about that? I have this disgusting passion for junk food when I have been at the beach."

Sofia didn't look concerned. "I've been known to consume three hot dogs and an entire box of popcorn along with a couple of muffins in one afternoon."

"No doughnuts" she laughed teasingly. Sara's stomach rumbled. "Then let's go."

They made almost a buffet of it, batter-dipped fish sandwiches and French fries at one place, and ice cream at another. The calories were ridiculous, and Sara reveled in each one. She tended to eat healthy most of the time, half by preference and half because she wanted Amy to grow up healthy not to mention that restaurant vegetarian options tended to be heavy on fruit and salad; but every once in a while it was bliss to simply throw prudence to the winds and devour foods whose resemblance to nutrition was sketchy at best. But both did hold back a bit knowing there would be several courses at Brass' party later in the day.

For a while they just walked around looking in all the windows. They went into a gift shop and purchased some different Vegas souvenirs for Amy. As they passed by a porn shop Sofia broke into laughed.

"What?" Sara asked confused.

"You didn't see it?" Sofia laughed pulling Sara back to the window they just passed.

Sara looked at the show window for a while but was still clueless to what Sofia found so funny. "Sorry Sof, but I still don't get it" Sara exclaimed with a shaking head.

"You don't find an inflatable sheep dressed in pink lingerie funny?" Sofia chortled.

Sara shrugged, "guess some people has an animal fetishism" she said with a lopsided grin.

"Yeah, yeah, and that's fine as long as they use rubber animals" Sofia sputtered as she tried to hold in her laughter. She completely failed after she turned around to stare at Sara. "But seriously, you really have to be bad in the dating department if you're not even able to pick up an inflatable doll."

"Guess you have a point" Sara leaned against the window and grinning at Sofia. She shot a quick glance through the window, "perhaps we should go inside and ask them how many sheep's they have sold so far."

"You wouldn't dare" an incredulous Sofia said.

Sara pushed herself off of the window, "wouldn't I?" She said, physically pushing Sofia inside.

The speed with which Sara had pushed Sofia into the store astounded the room's other visitors, particularly Sofia, who was on the receiving end of people's stares.

"You know" Sofia grinned "I haven't been in a store like this since I worked here." She walked over to some shelves and looked at the things lying on them.

Sara came over and stood close beside her. "Ever used toy before, Sofia?"

Sofia held her gaze a moment, then arched an eyebrow at her, feeling both shy and annoyed at her knowing tone.

"I think I'll invoke my Fifth Amendment rights on that question."

"Riiiight" came Sara's amused tone as she led them further into the store.

"Have you?" Sofia asked a little while later.

Sara raised a brow, "with someone else or do you mean toys of a personal nature?" She asked.

"I think most women who have been single for a longer period of time has invested and used toy at some point. So no I don't mean by yourself, I mean with someone else" Sofia replied.

Sara deliberately chose not to answer the question instead she shot Sofia a mischievous grin, "wouldn't have taken you as an internet shopper. Thought you were the type who likes to see and touch things before you buy them."

"Huh? Internet… what are you talking about?" A completely confused Sofia asked.

Sara was having a hard time not laughing, "Well according to yourself, you have been single for a long time and you just told me you haven't been in a store like this since you worked here. So my conclusion is that if your theory about singles and toys is correct, you most have bought your toys over the internet." She explained snickering.

Sofia rolled her eyes at Sara, "so funny dear! But you're right I'm no online shopper." She gave her a small grin, before turning her attention back to shelf, "and regarding toys, currently I don't own anything. Do you?"

"No not currently." Sara said, trying to keep her humor under control. "And to answer your previous question, yes I have used toy with former lovers."

Sofia looked at a rack holding different kinds of whips, "I hope it isn't that kind of toys you prefer," she teased nodding towards the rack, "´cause I'm really not into pain."

"Nah" Sara lightly shook her head as she walked over to Sofia and stood close behind her, "I'm much more into, tie you to the bed and fuck you senseless," Sara whispered, fighting so hard to keep the laugher out of her voice.

Sofia swallowed hard and she blushed deeply, "Christ Sara, you can't say a thing like that."

"Uh… okay. Am I allowed to do it?" Sara lost the fight and began laughing.

Sofia moved to stand beside Sara, "out of here before you get any more ideas" she said lightly pushing the laughing brunette towards the exit door.

Sara had finally stopped laughing when they came outside; she took Sofia's hand and looked at her, "want to get some coffee before we go back?"

"Can we just get some back at the hotel. I'm really in a need of a shower" Sofia said.

"Sure no problem" Sara smiled.

When they came back Sofia went upstairs while Sara went into the dinner area in pursuit of coffee, the water was already running when Sara got into the suite with a pot and two cups. As she put the cups down on the table Sofia came up from behind and wrapped her arms around her.

"Oh hi" Sara said leaning back, "thought you were under the shower by now."

"Nope, I was waiting for you, you are coming with me."

Sara began turning but Sofia tightened her hold preventing the brunette from moving, her hands slid down her arms and took hold around her wrists. With her hands immobile, Sara responded by pressing against the blonde and rubbing her ass against her lower body.

Sofia kept holding Sara's wrists as she walked them into the bathroom, Sara sighed relieved when she saw it was a shower and not the bathtub Sofia had in mind. Slowly bringing Sara to a stop in front of her, Sofia let go of one wrist and turned the brunette around, she caressed her free hand up from Sara's waist and over her chest, fingers snaking until they found a home behind her neck. With their intertwined fingers, Sofia pulled her as close as possible before she tilted her face a little upward and caught the brunette's full lips with hers.

Sofia nipped softly on Sara's lower lip, seeking entrance to the warm cavern of her mouth. Access was eagerly granted, and soon, their tongues were dueling in a timeless dance, interspersed with pleasured gasps and panting breaths.

For the umpteenth time, Sara marveled at the fact that, with the slightest touch, Sofia could set every nerve-ending in her body ablaze with heavenly sensations. They both still had their clothes on, but Sara was already 'so close' to melting into a puddle of heated. The people she'd dated before Sofia had hardly been virgins, but it had never been quite like this with any of them; not even with Grissom. When she and Sofia made love, it seemed as though her greatest pleasure was to explore and truly enjoy her body. And, in the process, she'd intuitively found all of those special spots, and introduced her to several more that she'd never even known she had. She was certain that if, God forbid, their foray into being more-than-friends didn't work out, it would never be like this again with anyone else.

Desperate to see and touch Sofia's milky white skin, Sara reluctantly broke their kiss. As she struggled for breath, she barely managed to gasp out, "You're wearing too many clothes."

"I could say the same for you," Sofia replied with a smile. She couldn't wait to get her hands on the succulent curves that lay beneath the brunettes t-shirt and pants. "But no use of hands for you."

In the blink of an eye, and before the brunette could protest Sofia undressed them leaving them naked shortly after. In the midst of this whirlwind exercise, they somehow managed to make it under the shower without breaking or bruising anything.

Sara wrapped her arms around Sofia's neck, and captured her lips in another prolonged kiss that left them both trembling with arousal. As she kissed the blonde's jaw and neck with affectionate nips and licks, Sofia brought her hands up to her breasts and pinched her achingly-sensitive nipples between her fingers and thumbs.

"Yes," Sara encouraged in a rapturous hiss. Sofia continued to tantalize her turgid aureoles, making her sex tighten with anticipation.

Wanting to give as good as she got, Sara gently raked her fingernails over the rippling skin of Sofia's smooth back, leaving a trail of goose bumps in her wake. She reached between their bodies but only to be stopped by the blonde.

"No." Sofia gently placed the brunette's hands on her own back and pressed Sara back to lean against the shower wall. "I told you, no hands for you."

"That's not fair" Sara said sighing melodramatically for effect.

Sofia kissed her teasingly, "you had your fantasy, now it's my turn."

Sofia shoved a finger between the slippery folds of her pussy. "You're so wet" she ground out.

Any response that Sara could possibly have hoped to come up with instantly died on her tongue the second Sofia grazed her thumbs over her pebbled nipples. She pressed into her touch, wordlessly urging her to continue.

Answering her unspoken demand, Sofia cupped the rounded swells of her perfect breasts. Then she began to trace lazy circles on her supple flesh, approaching but, to Sara's utter chagrin, never quite reaching her pouting pussy that begged for her attention. Sara squirmed impatiently under the blonde's artful stroking, trying to direct her touch to where she craved it most. But Sofia was having none of it, determined to torment her, it seemed.

"Sof please…" Sara entreated in a moan.

"What babe?"

"Please… no more teasing."

Sara was well aware that Sofia was toying with her, but right now she was too acutely aroused for slow, sensual games. The blonde hadn't even kissed her breasts yet, and already she felt the beginnings of a raging orgasm forming deep in her belly.

With agonizing slowness, Sofia's lips surrounding one of her dark, puckered nipples. Not wanting to neglect its companion, her hand ventured towards her right breast, and she began to pinch and tug sensuously on the distended point that capped the pliant mound. Despite Sara's throaty pleas for Sofia to hurry, the blonde continued her leisurely worship of her bosom for several seemingly-endless minutes before switching her attentions, suckling and rolling her tongue on her right nipple while tweaking its neighbor, with a breathy sob of pleasure.

Sofia dropped to her knees; the action brought her eye-to-eye with the brunette's overheated pussy, which arched towards her in invitation. Sofia readily accepted.

Even though Sara knew it would undermine her already tenuous hold on her self-control, she risked a glance down at the blonde. Sofia's eyes captivated her, glittering with racy promises and ribald sensuality. Watching Sofia go down on her was almost enough to make her lose it right there, and she had to bite the inside of her cheek, not to let that happen.

"Sof!" Sara moaned.

"Schh babe… just let me eat you."

Sofia latched onto her sex; she pulled back for a second to regain her bearings, her lips titled up in a conspiratorial smile as she decided to change the pace a little.

Sofia tickled her inner thighs and nether lips with her tongue, covering them with soft kisses. Studiously avoiding the one spot where the brunette needed her touch the most, she plumbed her tongue into her depths, luxuriating in the way her inner walls squeezed her like a vise. Sara writhed against the blonde's mouth, sighing fretfully as she nimbly avoided her efforts to guide her to her straining clit. Finally, she gave into her insistent, separating her sticky labia with the pads of her thumbs and exposing the throbbing bud that sat at the zenith of her cleft.

A pair of fingers slipped deep inside Sara, followed by the delicious curling of Sofia's tongue against the bundle of nerves that sat just above it. Over and over the blonde circled her thrumming button while gliding her fingers in and out of her sodden vagina, driving her totally insane with longing until she could feel the deep throbbing in her stomach that signaled her imminent climax.

"Yes… so close" Sara gasped out.

Wanting to push her over the edge, Sofia sucked strongly on her clit and simultaneously curled her long fingers upward, rubbing directly on her G-spot. That was all it took for Sara's orgasm to hit her hard. A husky scream of ecstasy left her throat as she came against the blonde's deft lips in a creamy gush.

After easing her down from her intense climax with feathery brushes of her lips and tongue, Sofia raised her head and stood, and just held Sara. When the fireworks behind her eyes finally died down, Sara opened her eyes and returned Sofia's gaze. None of them spoke they just stood holding each other under the hot water.

"Done with no touching" Sara smiled softly, as she grabbed Sofia's hands, "what do you want?" She whispered, kissing along her neck.

"You" was all Sofia retorted.

Sara placed both Sofia's hands around her neck and pulled her body close; she placed her own hands on the curves of the blonde's hips and brought their lips together. Sara slid her hands around the blonde's waist, extending her fingers so she could feel as much of her skin as possible. She stroked the firm surface of her midriff, reveling in the sensations and her reactions.

Letting go of the blonde's lips Sara tightened her grip on Sofia's hips and turned her around in her embrace. The move was unexpected and the brunette heard a little grunt of disappointment. Sara brought Sofia's arms up and placed them behind her own neck once again. Her fingertips glided down along the inside of the blonde's arms then brush the sides of her breasts. Sofia pushes her chest out, silently begging for Sara's touch there.

Sara dropped her lips to the blonde's throat, biting lightly against her skin, leaving small marks in her wake. She placed one finger on her shoulder before allowing it to trail down her throat. It wandered down the valley between her breasts, stopping for a short time atop each one, running over the swollen nubs gently. Then she trailed it down Sofia's stomach, following each hard muscle, each well cut line. She splayed her fingers across the muscles of her abdomen.

Sara slid her hand along a silky smooth curve, pausing momentarily on a rounded hip. Soft curls, damp with arousal, greeted her, welcoming her touch and enticing her to forge ahead. The brunette brushed her fingers through golden hairs, purposefully putting pressure on a hard nub as she slid her hand over a ridge and into an abundant pool of wetness.

Sara eased a finger inside the warm, wet opening, working the digit in and out in slow, measured thrusts. A second finger joined the first, as her other hand found its way down, over Sofia's clit, teasing the nub mercilessly. Sofia moaned and rocked against the brunette's hands.

Sofia could feel the rising heat coursing through her veins and wondered how long her legs would be able to support her, even with the help of the brunette's body she was pinned against. Sara sped up her thrusting, still pumping into Sofia with deliberate movements, her fingers sliding easily in and out of the very slick center. She moved her finger back and forth over Sofia's g-spot and that was all Sofia needed and she went crashing over the edge. Sara continued to pump her fingers drawing out the blonde's orgasm.

For a long time after Sara just hold Sofia until she was able to stand on her own, the blonde finally turned and found her lovers lips in a long kiss. They washed and dried up quickly and subsequently they went to bed for a nap wrapped up in each other's arms.

When they woke up again both went for a quick shower before getting dressed, subsequently they sat down out on the balcony and small talked over a cup of coffee until it was time to leave for Jim's birthday party.

**Tbc…**


	27. Chapter 27

_**Chapter 27**_

When they went into the main ballroom of the Tangiers it was already beginning to get crowded, they caught sight of Nick, Greg and Catherine on the edge of a group standing between the tables and the dance floor, they stepped forward towards them, Sara smiled at her former co-workers.

"Hello" Sara said, smiling "whao Greg you look great in a Tux."

"Hey" they replied, Greg blushing a little.

"Where's the birthday boy?" Sofia asked.

"I saw Brass talking with your mother over by the other side" Nick dutifully reported.

"And Grissom is sulking over by the curtains," Catherine laughed. "Come on; let's go see if we can offer him some company for a while."

"Be right with you after saying hey to Jim and my mother" Sofia cheerfully said and sailed away.

After a few minutes of talking Brass looked around, "Well, I'm off to go mingle with the people I still haven't welcomed" he blurted quickly.

Sofia tried to discreetly slip away from her mother but Grace snagged the sleeve of her suit, stopping her from making the graceful exit.

"You seem in exuberant spirits tonight" came Grace's assessment.

Sofia's mouth twitched as she fought a smile. She glanced around the room, then back to her mother, "mmm, nice to be back and meet everyone again."

But Grace merely smiled and reached out a hand to touch along her cheek, "bullshit, your good mood has nothing to do with coming back and everything to do with Ms. Sidle."

Sofia rolled her eyes, but quickly her expression softened and she smiled at her mother, shaking her head slightly. "Despite what you think you know, I will neither confirm nor deny your perceptions" she challenged, looking loftily at her. Grace dramatically pressed a hand to her chest, sighing.

"You are so doing her."

Startled, Sofia blushed, looking at her mother who refused to meet her eye, "mom!"

The dour glance Sofia shot her was enough to make Grace laugh loudly and somewhat heartlessly, "listen sweetie. Do what moves you. Follow your heart. You don't need my permission or approval for that." She looked at her daughter and winked, "I think it's great you finally have someone in your life again" she grinned, aware of Sofia's discomfort.

"I know" Sofia muttered, trying to think of something to say. She rubbed her face to hide the heat, and at that moment Brass came back.

The band struck up _Stardust_, and Jim drew in a breath. "Wanna dance?" He shyly asked Grace.

Grace blinked and nodded with flattering rapidity; she held out her arm to Brass and they walked out to the dance floor amid thirty or so other couples already there.

Sofia went back to the others and from that point, everyone danced almost nonstop. Greg made Sara laugh when he dipped her, his confident style a tribute to patient lessons from his aunt, he confessed. Nick was a little mechanical, a box stepper but still a lot of fun as he gossiped about Hodges's inability to land a single dance with anyone so far. Grissom was a good partner, but utterly silent.

Stepping back into the ballroom after a trip to the restroom, Sofia spotted Sara immediately despite of the semi-gloom of the place. She stood chatting with two women from the police department, both of them mooning over her in the way of shy women everywhere. In a flirtatious gesture one of them reached out to touch Sara's cheek.

Striding forward, Sofia moved straight through the crowds until she loomed before Sara. She grabbed her wrist, wordlessly and led her off to the dance floor.

Flustered, Sara allowed herself to be towed out into the press of bodies on the floor then pulled into Sofia's arms. They settled possessively around her, one flat palm pressed along her spine, the other cupping her right hand in a tight grip. The music was fading as the band ended their tune and began another one.

"Is everything all right?" Came Sara's panting breath in her ear.

"No" Sofia's words were soft and her tone light, but there was a core of heat in them, "I want to get out of here and into you. Pretty basic, Ms. Sidle."

Sara looked at her, eyes wide, feeling her body flush hard in quick passionate response, the wet heat between her thighs growing. Sofia's hand pressed her closer, and Sara felt the heat of the blonde's body seeping through her dress. She smelled of clean perspiration and arousal, a personal Eau De Perfume that left her weak with desire. Goose bumps broke out along her arms, her nipples hardened as she brushed against Sofia's breasts.

Sara opened her mouth to speak and suddenly found herself engulfed in a deep demanding kiss of such sweet intensity she could feel her toes curl deep in her shoes. She broke away with a little whimper of pleasure as Sofia whispered, "There… serious evidence."

"I… I'm not fully convinced. I may need repeated samples to reach a definite conclusion" Sara tried to protest, but she blushed and fought the urge to squirm. Sofia's kiss had stirred her hormones to frenzy, and her words were not helping at all.

They danced. Sara knew it would be the sort of dreamy memory that would haunt her years later as a moment of sensual torment. The feel of Sofia in the semi-darkness, the anticipation building, her hands clung to the blonde's back, molding against her slender shoulder blades as she guided her around the dance floor, gradually steering her towards one of the side exits, their journey a subtle trip across the floor.

Sofia spoke in a voice heavy with controlled passion, "get your things we're leaving."

Sara just nodded and followed her out onto the dark street, her heart beating fast, her mouth dry.

The corridors were crowded with party guests. Wordlessly they slipped in to the elevator, around them the crush of passengers chattered away, but it was just noise to them now. The car rose higher, passing the seventeenth floor, letting the last three guests off. Sara pressed the button for the top level and pressed her palms against the metal doors, trying to steady herself. When the car slowed, they tottered out and into the hallway.

Sara tried to hide the tremor in her legs and looked at Sofia. When she turned her face to hers, she bit back a moan at the fierce blue glitter of her eyes. Sara froze, but Sofia shifted and moved towards her, backing her up until her spine pressed on the gilt wallpaper of the hall.

She welcomed her tongue into her mouth with breathless delight, losing herself in the hot, wet kiss. Regretfully Sofia pulled back after a long delicious moment. Sara tried to calm her breathing down, tried to loosen the tension that was lodged between her shoulders and thighs, but it seemed impossible to do. She was all too aware of the woman standing in front of her, of the heat radiating off from her. They had barely exchanged words since leaving the party, and yet both of them were perfectly aware of each soft breath.

Sofia laughed softly, overwhelmed, achingly aroused, wanting the moment to last forever just like this. Her mouth met Sara's in a soft kiss, their tongues circling as her hands began to shift. With a groan Sara broke away and opened their door and pulled them both inside before sliding into the blonde's waiting embrace, her lips open against hers.

This was no gentle kiss. Lips slid sensually across lips, and when Sara ran her tongue along the place where their flesh connected, Sofia actually whimpered, and granted her immediate access to the hot depths of her mouth. The blonde's hand caressed the back of Sara's neck, trying desperately to draw her closer. The brunette's free hand, meanwhile, had crept under the back of Sofia's blouse, and she was busy running fingers over the skin of her back and waist.

When the brunette's fingers slipped inside the top hem of Sofia's slacks along her lower back, the blonde compulsorily bucked her hips against Sara's. Sofia's lips left Sara's as she attempted to breathe, which was extremely hard at the moment, for Sara's hand had slid from beneath her clothes to grasp her butt, crashing her lower body hard into hers.

Sofia's lips crashed onto the brunette's, and tongues resumed their duel. In the back of her mind, Sara registered two hands yanking her shirt from her pants. In the next second, she was free of it, and Sofia had set to work on her pants.

Sara's gentle palms covered the blonde's fingers, and in that moment both of them slowed their pace. Sofia locked her deep-blue orbs with the brunette's dark brown ones, and she noted with irony that the term 'windows into the soul' could never begin to describe the world she'd just revealed to her with her eyes.

Sofia saw lust and desire and need and passion. She also saw unending love, compassion, unfailing devotion, and complete surrender. The intensity of Sara's gaze left Sofia trembling, and the brunette had to catch her as her knees buckled slightly underneath her.

Unbeknownst to Sofia, Sara saw that same world reflected in her mesmerizing eyes. Slowly, she lowered her head to the blonde's and captured her lips in the most shattering kiss Sofia had ever experienced… powerful in its simplicity, filled with the love none of them had dared saying out loud, yet.

Sara let Sofia catch her breath for a brief moment before finding her lips once more, forcefully thrusting her tongue into her mouth as if to claim her as hers. The brunette's tender palms still covered Sofia's atop her pants, and she guided her fingers to undo the button and lower the zipper of her pants. As she liberated Sara from the slacks, the brunette's fingers wandered to her blouse. She momentarily stole the blonde's hands so she could rid her of the silken shirt.

Of its own accord, Sara's left hand darted out to claim her hip and draw her in, right hand snaking to her waist. Sofia's eyes fell closed at the sensation of the brunette's hand caressing her waist, her ribcage, thumb brushing the underside of her breast. It was almost more than she could stand the excruciating transition to this slow, luxurious pace. With a devastating kiss Sofia started moving them toward the bedroom. It ended up taking some time.

As gingerly as possible, Sara lowered Sofia to the bed. She hovered over the blonde in her arms, and when she looked down at her, her entire world shook. Sofia was perfect, in every way, from the slight asymmetry of her breasts, to the freckle that adorned the hollow of her left hip. And Sara knew she could never go back to a live without Sofia after tonight.

Quickly dispelling that depressing thought, Sara lowered her head. First capturing Sofia's lips in a kiss then trailing, opened-mouth kisses down her body. She memorized every last detail of the blonde's curves, the way she responded to her, how she sounded when her hands caressed her just so. Sofia traded off the brunette's explorations with her own, and when they couldn't stand it any longer, they finally came crashing together.

Legs, arms and breast mingled together, thighs pressing just the right places with the right amount of pressure. None of them naked yet but it didn't matter that could come later. Both felt each other's hot breath glance across their faces and their bodies pressed intimately together, and for the rest of the night, everything around them disappeared. Their mouths crashed together, and the night was lost to their cries.

They checked out around noon the next day and met up with their old team for brunch. The wind had picked up by the time brunch was over; Sara felt it snapping at her shirt as her friends hugged her goodbye outside the restaurant. Sara leaned her shoulder on Sofia's as she drove them to the airport.

Their plane touched down at three forty-five in the afternoon. Sofia feared Sara would quickly withdraw now that they were on home turf, but as they fetched their luggage at the baggage carousel, she didn't shy away, her arm wrapped loosely around her waist, they watched black suitcase after black suitcase pass them by.

They collected their bags in silence and then went for Sofia's car. As they pulled up to Sara's house, Sofia insisted on helping her with her bags.

"Are you staying or do you want to go home?"

"You haven't spent time with Amy these past couple of days" Sofia exhaled, putting an arm around her pouting girlfriend, "so I'm going home." When Sara narrowed her eyes at her, she pressed, reassuring her that she planned on returning Tuesday after work as usual.

Sofia's mouth twisted into a small smile as her eyes avoided hers. They kissed and hugged each other goodbye and Sara dreamily watched her get into her car and drive off. Chuckling a bit, she rolled her suitcase over the threshold and into the laundry room, removing the souvenirs she had purchased for Amy, a T-shirt, and some other stuff. It surprised her how much she ached to see her daughter.

When Laura's car pulled up in front of their home, Sara was waiting in the front yard.

"Mom!"

It was the best word in the world. Sara squeezed Amy tight, lifting her up. "Did you have a good weekend, Sunbeam?"

"Yes! How were Vegas? Did you have fun? Did they give you food on the plane?"

"Good, yes, and peanuts," Sara laughed. "But I missed you. Come on, let's go inside. I got you a couple of things." Sara gazed at Laura, "time for coffee? I just made a fresh pot."

Homework was completed while Sara and Laura drank coffee, pizza was ordered, and mother and daughter relaxed in front of the television. "We totally forgot to watch who wants to be a millionaire," Amy yawned as the credits rolled.

Sara blinked and stretched. "I guess we did."

"Probably because Sofia isn't here" Amy wondered.

Sara stiffened. "Do... you... like it when Sofia is here?"

"Yeah, I guess" Amy said, shrugging her shoulders.

"You guess?"

"Yeah, she's fun and smart." Amy sighed, her head lolling back against the couch, "she always answers lot of the questions correct."

After tucking Amy in, Sara went into the kitchen and loaded the last of the dishes into the dishwasher. She ambled over to the refrigerator for a drink. As she poured a glass of water for herself the phone started ringing.

Sara answered, "Hey you got home all right?"

"Hi, yeah there wasn't much traffic" Sofia replied. "Do you have time to talk?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Just tucked Amy in" Sara said, sounding a little shy.

They talked a bit more about their trip, upcoming work and Amy and then said goodnight.

When Sofia arrived at Sidle house, they continued their daily routine with Amy the center of attention, making the forced distance between the two adults a bit easier to bear. They smiled contentedly at each other as Amy prattled on about the upcoming Christmas vacation.

Consummation is usually a milestone in any romantic relationship, so Sofia was a bit surprised at how quickly she and Sara reverted back to friendly mode in the presence of Amy. She didn't know what she was expecting, but business as usual wasn't it. Wasn't the sky supposed to open up? Weren't the birds supposed to sing? It wasn't just some ordinary day of the week. Mere days ago, Sara's tongue had been in her mouth, her thumb and forefinger had fiddled with one of her nipples while her other hand moved inside her. And now… for the entire world, they looked like cordial friends at best.

They needed to talk!

After putting Amy to bed Sara met up with Sofia in the kitchen. She was loading the last of the dishes into the dishwasher. Sara watched her for a moment. She was so comfortable in her home. "I'd tell you it's not necessary but I know by now it's not going to stop you."

"Right you are, my dear," Sofia said, meticulously squeezing some dishwashing detergent into the machine and carefully closing it. "Sara…" she wasn't smiling, but she wasn't frowning either. Sara lifted a brow and she continued, "We need to talk."

Sara shrugged, doing her best to act casual, "yeah I know."

They made their way into the living room where they took seats close together on the couch. Sofia wound her arm around Sara's neck, letting her fingers drift in the hair at her nape.

"So how do we do this? How are we going to have our… time together? I'm not asking you to tell Amy anything just yet but on the other hand I don't think I can go back to just being friends again."

"Neither can I" Sara leaned in and kissed her cheek simply because she could. "I'm just not sure about how to go about it. Whether I should talk to her or slowly introduce her to us being physical attached to each other."

Sara smiled nervously as she cast a quick glance at Sofia, "I know it isn't fair to ask but can we keep it to ourselves until I figure out how to handle it?"

Sofia studied Sara's face carefully before nodding her head, "of course we can I'm flexible as long as I know where I stand."

"We could make every second Wednesday and every second Monday ours. Normally we both have those days off and Amy will be in school" Sara pondered.

Sofia regarded Sara closely for a moment before shaking her head, "yeah I guess that could work."

"Mmm" Sara mumbled into her ear before moving to kiss along her jaw line.

"Honey, we can't," Sofia told her, but she moved quickly to capture her lips.

"Just a little," she said softly into the blonde's mouth. "I want to kiss you."

Sofia didn't seem to object any further as she tugged her onto her lap and joined the kiss avidly. Sara knew they could do nothing more than make out. Amy was in her room and the idea that she could catch them sent a nervous chill up her spine, but Sofia's lips were so sweet, her mouth so giving, that Sara decided to risk the next precious moments and enjoy her. After a few more minutes of mild groping, Sofia pulled her mouth away from hers. "We've got to stop."

"Yeah, I know," Sara said, sitting back down next to her doing her best not to sulk.

Sofia smiled, shaking her head and leaning back down against the couch cushions, "we'll just have to wait until tomorrow."

Sara exhaled forcefully, "yes I know" she said, shifting a bit to get comfortable.

Sara turned on the TV slowly Sofia turned sideways so that her back was against the arm of the couch and moved her leg behind the brunette, Sara looked at her and smiled. She lay down between her legs and placed her head on her chest. For the rest of the night they just watched TV without talking much, enjoying each other's closeness was enough.

Sara found Sofia in the kitchen drinking coffee after driving Amy to school. She grinned and sat down beside of her, turning her body to face her. "Missed you..."

"Missed you too…" Sofia's fingers traced indistinguishable patterns on the brunette's thigh.

Sara leaned into her personal space, lingering dangerously close to her lips, "how much?"

Sofia rose pulling Sara along with her, her eyes darkening as she licked her lips. Leaning into her, she brushed her lips against the side of Sara's neck. Hearing her soft gasp, she smiled and allowed her tongue to taste her skin.

"Why don't I show you just how much?"

Sara pulled back quickly and looked into her eyes. She glanced at Sofia's inviting lips as her hands slid around to the small of her back. The blonde groaned as she covered her mouth with hers. Sara's hands slid down, cupping the firm cheeks of her ass as her tongue plunged into her mouth.

Sofia licked her lips seductively, sliding the brunette's shirt from her shoulders. Sara quickly pulled the light red blouse over the blonde's head. Sofia peppered Sara's chest with kisses as her fingers unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans.

Sara eyes closed for a moment, enjoying the sensation of her lips dancing across her chest. "Not here..."

Sofia pulled back, slight confusion shone in her eyes. "Huh?"

"This... wouldn't be very comfortable..."

Sofia's confusion turned to excitement as she smiled brightly at the half-naked woman standing in front of her, "bedroom?"

Sara took a step back and motioned with her head towards the hallway, "first door on the right..."

Sofia walked to the kitchen door and looked over her shoulder. She grinned as she slipped the bra from her shoulders and let it fall to the floor, "you coming?"

Sara nodded and was able to mumble a couple of syllables. Sofia chuckled lightly as she followed her down the hall to her bedroom. Halfway down the hall, Sara took hold of Sofia's arm and halted her forward motion. The blonde turned around as she felt the resistance and looked into her eyes.

"Don't tell me you've changed your mind..."

Sara shook her head. "No... I just want to... look at you."

Sofia blushed lightly as Sara's eyes roamed over her naked chest. Her fingers trembled slightly as she lifted her hand. She gasped as the brunette's fingertips glided along the underside of her breast. Her thumb brushed across her quickly hardening nipple, eliciting a moan from her lips.

Sara quickly, yet gently, pushed the blonde back against the hallway wall. Her lips sought out the tender flesh of Sofia's neck as she rolled her nipple between her fingers. The blonde's nails scraped along Sara's back as she pushed her hips into hers.

"Sara…"

Sara's fingers slid down her torso to the button of her jeans. She licked a path from her neck to her collarbone, gently nipping at the sensitive skin as she pulled the stubborn button free. Sofia turned her head slightly, easily able to capture the helix of the brunette's ear with her lips. She ran her tongue over the smooth skin, moaning lightly in her ear as Sara slipped her fingers into her panties. Sara lifted her head and met Sofia's eyes as she stroked her swollen lips slowly.

Sara grinned as Sofia closed her eyes and rested the back of her head against the wall. "You're so... wet..."

Sofia groaned as her finger gently penetrated her. Sara thrust her finger slowly as she pressed her sex against her hip. Sofia's nails dug into her shoulders as she began to move her pelvis.

Sara placed her mouth next to her ear and whispered softly. "Does it feel good?"

Receiving a grunt in reply, Sara smiled and eased another finger into her depths. Sofia groaned loudly as Sara's thumb pressed against her clitoris. Her fingers wound themselves into the soft hair at the nape of her neck. Sara's free hand covered her breast and squeezed gently.

Sara felt her inner walls tighten around her fingers. Sofia groaned in protest as she quickly removed her digits. Sara held her gaze as she lifted her hand to her mouth and licked the blonde's juices from her skin. Sara's eyes darkened another shade as she shifted to stand directly in front of her. Placing her palms on the wall on either side of Sofia's head, she leaned forward and flicked her tongue against her bottom lip.

"I love the way you taste..." Sara's right hand slid down the wall, moving to grasp her hip in an attempt to keep the blonde from bumping against her thigh. "I... want to be on top of you when you come..."

Sofia's passion-glazed eyes stared at her as she fought to control her breathing. "Bed..."

Sara gently pushed her into the room and released her body. She shortly went to the bathroom, returning she found Sofia lying across her bed completely nude. Her eyes locked with Sofia's, she slid her jeans and panties off and tossed them on the floor. She stood there for a brief moment, just watching the blonde watch her, until she motioned for her. "Come here..."

Sara climbed onto the bed and lowered her body beside of her. Her fingers glided over Sofia's thigh, enjoying the gentle quiver of the muscles underneath the flesh. Placing her hand on the brunette's shoulder, Sofia rolled onto her back, pulling her with her.

As Sara leaned over her, her lips found hers. She kissed her softly at first, treasuring the sensation. She deepened the kiss when Sofia parted her lips and ran her tongue over her lower lip. Sara groaned into her mouth as Sofia reached between them and slid her slender fingers into her wet folds. She stroked her gently, caressing the brunette's inner walls with her fingers.

Sara fought the urge to tell her that she loved her, remembering an article she once read. According to the article, saying 'I love you' for the first time, wasn't very believable if said immediately before sex. But, as she looked into her dark blue eyes, she knew that she could see the depth of her emotions.

Sara's hand slowly travelled down her side, and between her legs and let two fingers entered her. Sofia gasped as the brunette pulled back slightly before thrusting her hand forward again. The length of her strokes gradually increased, yet she kept her pace slow. Almost agonizingly slow.

With a quick glance into her eyes, Sara's mouth descended on her. She felt the rumble in the blonde's chest as she plunged her tongue into her mouth. Their thrusts became faster and more powerful and only the need to breathe broke their kiss. Sofia screamed her name as her orgasm crashed over her contemporary she felt Sara's orgasm rush over her, heard her crying out her name.

Sara collapsed on top of her, panting heavily. Sofia ran her fingers through the brunette's sweat-drenched hair as they tried to regain control of their breathing. Her breath was hot on the blonde's skin as she gasped for air. Sofia whimpered lightly as she felt Sara's fingers leave the inside of her.

"Damn..." It was the only word Sofia could get out.

The muscles in her arms quivered as Sara lifted herself up to look into her eyes. "You okay?"

Sofia smiled widely as she nodded; Sara rolled onto her back and pulled the blonde's glistening body towards her. Sofia laid her head on her chest, smiling as the brunette's rapid heartbeat began to slow.

They just relaxed the day away, not bothering to get dressed as they snuggled under the covers, snacking on food and flipping through the channels on TV without paying much attention to what was on. The skin-on-skin contact was so welcome, so comforting.

**Tbc…**


	28. Chapter 28

_**Chapter 28 **_

After Sara had tucked a very sleepy Amy into bed, she went back to the family room. Sofia was still parked on the couch, looking more contemplative than usual.

"What's up?" She asked as she plopped down by her side, scooting up close to her.

Sofia wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "What should I get Amy for Christmas?"

Sara raised her brows. "Oh…" She cleared her throat. "You really don't have to get her anything. She's got everything she needs."

"Of course I need to get her something," Sofia laughed. "I'm having such a hard time figuring out what to get, though. Besides a dog, that's the one thing I know she'd love."

"No dog," Sara said firmly, chuckling a bit, "a cat is more than enough."

"Okay but then we still haven't solved my problem," she told her. "What do I get Amy?"

"Well as long as you keep it pink I think she'll like almost everything."

"All right, then. What are you going to get her?" Sofia asked, tugging Sara onto her lap.

She groaned happily as she let her warmth seep into her. "I have no idea. Amy says she rather that we use the money to buy the kids at The Rainbow Home a present. So I'm no closer than you are."

"You'll think of something," Sofia sighed, placing a soft kiss on her shoulder.

"Yeah," Sara sighed, relaxing back against the sofa, pulling Sofia down with her, "are you free this weekend?"

"Yes I am, why?" She asked.

"I have promised Amy we could take a Christmas trip to the mall. She thinks we still need some decoration and a tree and we might as well get started with Christmas gifts to."

"Count me in," she nodded. "Not that I'm going to be that helpful. I haven't put up a tree for ages."

"It's okay, then you can be my moral support" Sara snickered.

"That I can" she chuckled, leaning her head on her shoulder.

Despite current appearances to the contrary, Sara wasn't really a Grinch… at least that's what she kept telling herself.

Sara leaned against the rackety shopping cart, trying vainly to keep her exasperation in check. Wild children ran unchecked through the narrow aisles while their mothers stood by, oblivious to the havoc their supernumerary offspring were creating. Even the music was getting on her nerves; if they had to play Christmas songs non-stop, then at least play _Christmas_ songs.

Sara stood silently as Amy and Sofia moved slowly through the aisle of ornaments, carefully picking coordinating colors while getting a variety of sizes and textures. Sofia was ready to move to the selection of lights when she looked up and caught a sly grin on the brunette's face. Sara immediately adopted an innocent expression, but the blonde silently stared at her with her arms crossed over her midsection until she shrugged.

Amy scouted the aisles for things she liked, turning to her mother every so often with a "Mom, can we get this?" This was almost always followed by a nod. The girl would toss said object in the cart and proceed to hunt down the next Christmas item she couldn't live without.

"Tree stand," Sofia said as they arrived at a stack of green iron contraptions that looked more suitable for torture than for celebratory purposes.

Amy loaded the fanciest-looking tree stand into the cart before getting lost in the selection of ornaments. Sofia leaned over to Sara once they were out of the little girl's earshot and placed a comforting hand on her back. "I think I know where to get some mistletoe, if you want to decorate the bedroom" she said, her eyes twinkling.

Sara laughed and reached over to give her a quick peek on the cheek, "bet you do."

Sofia winked at her and reached over to a nearby shelf, plucking a bright red Santa hat and securing it on her head. "To get you in the mood," she explained, smiling at her as she moved to take it off.

"Hey, Amy," Sofia called out. When the girl looked up at her, she nodded to Sara. "Don't you think mom looks really good in that hat?"

Amy smiled wildly, obviously high on the excitement. "So cool!" She said, giving the thumbs up the best she could with an armful of ornaments. Sara rolled her eyes and left the hat on.

"That's one way of describing it," Sara sighed, her brow furrowing.

When decorating with a seven-year-old, more is more. Sara learned this as she strung the twelfth set of lights through the branches of their sweet smelling, recently purchased Blue Spruce. It had been Sofia's suggestion to start with the lights, and while she didn't understand why the order of decorations mattered at first, she was beginning to see that threading lights through ornament-strewn branches would've been even harder than trying to weave them through naked branches. Dealing with the occasional sharp pinch of the needles was difficult enough.

Once the lights were on, Amy grabbed an ornament and then looked to Sofia. "What do I do now?"

She raised an eyebrow slowly, and pursed her lips a moment before continuing. "You just put it on. There's no order to it. Put each ornament where you'd like it to be."

The three of them began randomly assigning branches to the ornaments Amy had picked earlier that day. Sofia reached into a shopping bag and pulled out the star for the top. "Amy, why don't you do the honors?" She handed her the star and then hoisted her up so she could fit the glittery finial on the topmost branch. After she set her back down on the floor, they stood back to admire their handiwork. "It looks amazing," Sofia commented. "Good job picking the ornaments, Amy."

"Excellent," Sara smiled.

"So what do we do next?" Amy sighed, plopping down on the couch in the living room.

Sara cocked an eyebrow and walked over to a nearby end table where she had placed her purse. She reached in and pulled out a folded envelope. "These are the letters from your old study group at the home," she said, handing Amy the package, "eleven letters. Perhaps you can come up with some ideas to what to get them."

Amy nodded and then walked into her room to go through the letters.

Next day they went back to the mall to buy the things Amy had picked from the Christmas lists, their last stop was the gift wrap section where they stocked up on wrapping paper, cards, and tape, loads of tape. Sara eyed the girl as she selected a penguin-themed Christmas card to give along with the presents.

It was late afternoon when they returned back home. "Okay, so do we eat first and then wrap presents, or do we wrap presents and eat?" Sara asked.

Amy cocked an eyebrow. "What's for dinner?"

"Veggie burgers" Sara replied.

"Let's eat and then wrap presents."

Sara looked to Sofia. "Cool with you?"

Sofia shrugged. "I could eat."

They quickly cleared the table after dinner and made their way to the family room where the presents waited. In under a half an hour, they had everything sorted out. They moved the coffee table aside so they could settle down on the floor and get to wrapping.

Afterwards Sara grabbed the remote control and switched on the television. "Oh. _It's a Wonderful Life_. It's just starting. I haven't seen that in years."

"Me either," Sofia said as she curled the last ribbon with the edge or a pair of scissors.

"What's that?"

"A Christmas movie," Sara supplied, getting comfortable against the pillows of the couch.

"It's a classic," Sofia informed her. "Just watch. It's good."

And it was. Amy became mesmerized. Unfazed by the dark undertones of the movie, she was enthralled by the story presented to the viewer.

"I liked it," Amy yawned, leaning into her mother's shoulder.

"Me too," Sara sighed, she looked at her watch, "bedtime" she announced, "its school day tomorrow."

Amy said goodnight to Sofia before following her mother to the bathroom.

The days flew by so when Sara picked Amy up from school the second last day before the vacation, she expected to see a happy girl, excited by the upcoming holidays. What she encountered was a frenzied ball of nerves in the body of a seven-year-old.

"What's wrong?"

"We're having a party tomorrow in school and I've gotta give everyone Christmas cards and I said I'd bring in muffins for the party and we've gotta make them" Amy explained breathlessly.

"Slow down" Sara said. She could feel Amy's anxiety seep into her own system. "Let's go through what you need again: cards."

"Yes."

"For how many kids?"

Amy bit her lip, "twenty-five."

"Okay, twenty-five cards. And what else, did you say muffins?"

"Yeah, I volunteered to make muffins" Amy added, blushing slightly.

Sara sighed loudly. "Twenty-five cards, twenty-five muffins… and try to give me a little more notice next time when you need me to make muffins."

They bought the ingredients for muffins and then headed to a local drug store for cards. They chose ones with snowmen on them, just in case children in Amy's class didn't celebrate Christmas. When they got home, not a little out of breath, they were greeted by Sofia who had reached the house before them. Sara began assembling the eggplant au gratin and placed it in the oven.

The adults small-talked until dinner was ready and all sat down and talked, mostly about Amy's day. The girl disappeared after eating while Sara and Sofia kept sitting with a mug of coffee. A little while later Sofia got up and cleaned the table while Sara went searching for Amy.

She found Amy in the family room, putting the finishing touches on her friends' gifts. "Did you do all of your cards?"

"Yep," Amy smiled, pointing to the stack of envelopes on the coffee table.

Sara checked her watch. "Hmm… bedtime, it's getting late."

Amy stepped forward, "but what about the muffins?"

"Don't worry about them." Sara kissed the top of her daughter's head and gave her shoulder a squeeze. "Tear along. I'll be there in five minutes to tuck you in."

Amy sent her a quick smile over her shoulder, "okay, okay."

Sara went back to the kitchen, she found Sofia hovering over the instructions on the back of the box of cake mix. "It's not rocket science, Professor."

Sofia laughed, "Very funny."

Sara took the box from her hand. "Don't worry, I'll do this. You sit down."

Sofia took her seat at the kitchen table and watched her quietly. Sara got to work on two batches of chocolate muffins, cracking eggs and measuring vegetable oil.

"You're very good at that," she remarked as Sara poured batter into the muffin cups.

Sara smiled, "not much to it, really" she said, slipping the pans into the pre-heated oven.

"Sara…I want to talk to you about something…"

"Okay, but before we talk about yours, I need to tell you something" Sara said excitedly. "The family has carried unanimously that Christmas is to be held here and Amy has very emphatically ordered me to invite you."

Sofia's face fell, "Yeah, um… look… I promised my mother I'd spend Christmas with her so…" her voice petered off.

Sara's eyes met hers squarely, her fingers tightening a little, "oh, okay."

"I… I promised my mother," Sofia hesitated, bit her lip, and then went on. "And you and Amy will have such a great time with your family; you won't notice I'm not there. I promised my mother… and I didn't get to spend Thanksgiving with her, so…yeah."

It was on the tip of her tongue to say something, but she held the retort in. She felt disappointed, and, at the same time, guilty for being disappointed. Sofia wasn't going to spend Christmas with some random woman she met at a bar. She was going to be with her mother. Sara took a deep breath, doing her best to rein in her feelings.

Sofia smiled, worried. "I've wrapped Amy's presents so they're ready to go. I can drop them off tomorrow and you can store them somewhere until Christmas morning."

Sara straightened the dishtowel on the drying rack, "when are you leaving?"

"The day after tomorrow, I couldn't get a later flight, with the holiday rush."

"How long will you be gone?" Sara asked abruptly.

Sofia shrugged, "a week."

Sara pressed her lips together. "Um…okay. We'll miss you."

Sofia gave her a hug; she loosened her grip and dropped her arm to her side. "I'd better get going."

Sara raised her brows. "Okay."

Sofia left less than a minute later, and she stood alone in the kitchen, staring into space, until the oven timer brought her back to reality.

On their way home, Sara picked up a pizza. As she settled the large box on the passenger's seat, it hit her that she wasn't sure if Sofia was coming by to dinner. Unconsciously, she had bought enough food for three people. Sara buckled her seatbelt and drove home; she encouraged Amy to tell her everything that had happened at school that day. She needed the distraction.

"The cards was a hit" Amy said, her mouth full of pizza. "And the muffins were great and… hey, Where's Sofia?"

"Uh… um… well, she's home packing, she's going to Vegas to celebrate Christmas with her mother" Sara told truthfully.

Amy narrowed her eyes, "but mom what about her gift we haven't even bought it yet?"

Sara smiled kindly, "she won't be gone forever you can give it to her when she comes back."

"I guess" Amy counted pensively.

It was shocking for Sara to realize how integral Sofia's presence in their life was…

When Sara arrived home after dropping Amy off at Adam's house she found Sofia seated at the kitchen table, writing on a piece of paper.

"Hi been here long?" Sara asked, washing her hands and taking the seat opposite her.

Sofia let her mouth curve a little, "hi, no not really." She looked around, "Amy isn't here?"

"No I just dropped her off at Adam's place."

Sofia nodded and rose, "suppose it's safe to bring her presents inside then."

Sara got up as well, "got time for coffee?" Sofia just nodded on her way out.

She poured Sofia a cup of coffee as she came in, "whoa, you weren't kidding when you said presents."

"Sorry," Sofia apologized, taking the cup. "Guess I did went a little overboard." She sat down at the table again and took a sip.

Sara snorted with a touch of humor, "well if it's any consolation I don't think Amy will hold it against you." She grimaced and let out a breath, "so when's your flight?"

Sofia's voice was easy, but Sara could hear the tension underneath it, "at 2:45 p.m., I'm flying out from SF airport since they put out excursion tickets." She glanced at her watch, "it's in approximate 2 hours so guess I should be going."

Taking hold of her hand and looking into her eyes, Sara smiled, "I could drive you" she suggested, "that way you don't have to have your car parked at the airport."

"Sara, you don't have to…" Her voice trailed off as Sara gently squeezed her hand.

Sara leaned over and kissed her, "I offered, Sofia" She cut her off before she could say anything else. "It's not a problem."

Sofia's brows rose approvingly, "okay thanks."

"We'd better get moving." Sara got up and tucked her hair behind her ear, "I just need to use the bathroom first."

"I'm going to load my stuff in your car," Sofia told her. "I'll be waiting outside."

"I'll be right out," Sara said.

Sofia was waiting for her leaning against the car, sunglasses perched on her nose, she chuckled lightly as she allowed Sara to usher her into the passenger seat of the vehicle.

So while Amy spent the bulk of her Saturday at Adam's Christmas party, Sara drove Sofia to the airport. She tried not to focus on the fact that they wouldn't be together for most of the Christmas holiday.

Instead of pulling up next to departures so Sofia could unload the trunk and check her bag, Sara followed the signs to the parking lock and pulled into a space.

"You don't have to come with me. It's just a lot of waiting," she said, though Sara could see Sofia didn't look too broken up about getting to spend more time with her.

As the blonde moved to get out of the car, Sara grabbed her elbow, keeping her in her seat. Sara unbuckled her belt and leaned in to kiss her, her left hand moving to her face. Sofia cupped both hands around her jaw and explored her mouth gently.

"I miss you already," Sara whispered against her lips.

Sofia pulled back and blinked at her. "I don't have to go."

Sara shook her head and laughed. "Yes. Yes, you do." She sighed, patting her face lightly, "your family wants to spend Christmas with you and you have promised to come."

Sofia smiled against her mouth. "I'm going to miss you."

"You'd better."

After a few more minutes of closeness in the front seat of Sara's car, they got out and gathered Sofia's bags. "I remember the last time we were in this situation."

Sara smiled and closed the trunk, "yeah, Vegas."

"I was nervous then, too, but for a host of different reasons," Sofia laughed.

"Well," Sara smiled, wrapping her arm around Sofia's waist as they rolled her wheelie out of the parking lot and toward the departure terminal, "that turned out quite well, if I do say so myself."

"No complaints here."

Sofia retrieved her e-ticket and ID from her pocket and handed them in so she could check her large suitcase and get her boarding pass. Sara walked her to the line for the metal detectors, still unwilling to relinquish her hold on the blonde's waist.

"So I guess this is goodbye."

"Not yet," Sara sighed, gazing ahead at the long line in front of them.

"No one has ever driven me to the airport before. I mean… not counting taxi drivers."

Sara turned her body ever so slightly into Sofia's. "I'll be here to pick you up, too."

"You don't have to," Sofia began, but she cut her off.

"Yeah I do."

They kissed each other goodbye. She took a step back and watched as Sofia walked through the metal detector and gathered her things from the other side of the X-ray conveyer belt. She waved to Sara, and she waved back and watched her disappear through a pair of double doors leading to the gates.

Sara picked up Amy from the Christmas party on her way home. She made dinner while Amy sat on a stool and told about the party.

Sara drained the pasta and looked at Amy, "how about you get the forks and napkins and I'll bring the plates and food?"

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Amy take down the note hanging on the fridge with her name on before gingerly retrieve utensils from a kitchen drawer. It wasn't until they sat down at the dining room table and Sara's eyes darted to the empty chair that had been occupied all these months that she felt a wave of sadness pass over her. She did her best to focus on her daughter, and was doing a good job of it until the girl brought up Sofia.

Amy looked up from the note, "Sofia said she'd get me one of those I Love Las Vegas T-shirts; she said they sell them on the street everywhere there. But she said it wasn't my Christmas gift." Sara merely nodded and a happy Amy filled in the gaps of the conversation with the here and there of a seven-year-olds life.

The days leading up to Christmas were spent amiably enough. On the surface, no mother and daughter seemed happier. Sara did her best to conceal her unhappiness over Sofia's departure.

Mornings were spent getting Amy ready for being taken care of by Laura. Days were devoted to work. Nights were… well… family time. She had no other way to describe it. In the past six months, Sara had cobbled together a makeshift family. Each person complemented the other bringing out the best in the three of them.

**Tbc…**


	29. Chapter 29

_**Chapter 29**_

She missed her. She was home for the holiday, and yet her heart wasn't really in it. Sofia strolled along the strip, lost in thought.

She had been missing Sara for a long time, she knew that, but missing her after they'd rebuilt their friendship had sharpened that ache; while she was always glad to see her mother and brother, she'd found her thoughts constantly drifting back to Frisco.

And she couldn't help wondering how much Sara missed her in turn. Despite the development between them she knew nothing was definitively before Amy knew about them.

Long-lasting happiness was something that was truly new for Sara. She didn't want to lose it, but she knew that changes were on the horizon, and they would make or break her contentment. Her life right now was going well, but it couldn't remain as it was. Amy would start asking questions, and Sara was aware that she would need to be ready with a definition for what existed between herself and Sofia so she could explain things to the child in such a manner that was comfortable to all parties involved.

Sara sat in the worn sofa near the window, gazing out at the spectacle of feathery flakes falling down, the snow was beautiful. It wouldn't stick, she knew; in a few hours it would past, and there would be no more for decades. But for the moment the silent magic was in full force, and she watched, fascinated.

After all, the last time she'd seen snow had been the winter before she'd graduated from college.

Sara leaned her forehead against the window, ignoring the chill of the pane against her skin, and watched it swirl and tumble down from the sky, endless, pristine. It was hypnotizing in its own way, and if Sara had truly been alone she would have gone out and walked in it for hours, until her toes were numb and her hair wet with melt.

She sighed, watching her breath cloud briefly on the glass, and straightened, rubbing absently at the numb patch of skin on her forehead. Even if it was late Sara decided to wake Amy up knowing the girl would never believe it unless she saw the snow with her own eyes. She carried the girl into the library and sat down keeping Amy on her lap.

With only the light in the globe on, they sat in the semi-dark watching the snowflakes dancing towards the ground.

"It's beautiful, mom, can we go outside?"

"No sweetie, it's too late for that. You'll have to wait and see if it's still there tomorrow."

"But, mom," Amy tried again, "I'm on vacation so I can sleep in tomorrow."

Sara just smiled charitably, "no you can't you're going to visit Sean tomorrow."

"Are we going by the Home with the presents?"

"Yes we are in the afternoon, and tomorrow morning will be spent at the mall, we still have a few presents to buy along with some food products" Sara informed her.

"Can we go by the pet store? I need to buy a gift for Lucky."

"Of course we can, I think we are running low in cat food anyway."

Amy kept silent for a moment, "what shall I buy to Sofia?"

Sara kept a loving gaze on Amy, "Sunbeam, you don't have to buy her anything."

Amy cocked an eyebrow, "of course I do she wrote she got something for me."

"Yes, but I don't think Sofia expect you to buy her a present" she told her daughter.

"But I want to" Amy carried on, emotion flooding her face, "she's nice and… and she almost feels like family with all the time she spends here…" she said, letting her voice drift off.

Sara said nothing at first, she shifted uncomfortably, blushing a little bit, "you really like her, don't you?"

Nodding, Amy tugged her hair behind her ear and cleared her throat, "yeah I really do. It's like having a fun substitute mother. She always likes to do cool stuff and she is almost as smart as you."

"So you don't mind she's here as much as she is?"

"No" Amy replied warmly.

"Good" Sara sighed to herself and decided to just go for it, "because I want to tell you something. Do you remember a while ago you asked me if Sofia was my girlfriend?"

Amy looked thoughtful, "yeah."

"Okay." Sara couldn't quite believe she was having this conversation. "And that I said no, but promised you, you would be the first to know if things changed?"

Amy said nothing, only nodded at her.

"Well it has. We have decided we want our relationship to be more than just friendly" Sara said, cocking her head at the girl, watching her closely.

Amy buried her head in Sara's shoulder and giggled, "Mommy has a girlfriend."

"Yeah guess I do" Sara shrugged, surprised to find herself blushing by the teasing. "But are you okay with that development?"

Amy tilted her head and considered, "she practically lives with us anyway, and I like her so yeah it's okay."

"Glad to hear that." Sara looked thankful at the girl, "and despite this development, you are still the most important person in my life" Sara said, ending it at that.

"Mmm." Amy laid her head down on her mother's shoulder, curving one hand around her neck; Sara's pulse beating strong and slowly under her fingers. Sara pulled her a little closer, and Amy smiled, content.

Sara eventually tucked Amy into bed and took up residence on the comfortable chair in the corner of the room. She watched Amy sleep for as long as she could before exhaustion set in and her eyelids began to droop, she got up and went to bed.

And the snow kept falling.

Sara could feel a pair of eyes staring at her before she opened her own. She peeled one open and then the other. Amy was sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Mom?"

"Mmm-hmm" Sara slowly stretched.

"I've got an idea," Amy said excitedly, crawling further up the bed.

"What is it?"

"Okay, you still remember what we talked about earlier when I thought Sofia was your girlfriend, right?" Sara nodded and the girl continued, "Good, so I was thinking, we should buy a bigger bed as a Christmas gift for Sofia. Wouldn't that be great?"

Sara tried to blink away the tiredness from her eyes. "Yeah," she yawned. "Good idea."

"So we can get it for her?"

"Sure. Whatever," she replied, her head hitting the pillow once more.

It wasn't until an hour and three mugs of coffee later Sara realized what she had agreed to, but Amy was literally bounding on the couch in excitement, so she couldn't find it en her heart to go back on her word.

After buying various grocery and the last few presents Sara followed Amy up the aisle in the furniture store. Amy began to make her way towards the beds closely followed by Sara, but none of the beds seemed to satisfy the girl.

"Mom, don't they have any beds bigger than these ones?"

Sara smothered a giggle, "I suppose so I'm just not sure about where they keep them."

"Welcome! Anything can I help you folks with?" The salesman inquired.

"We need a big bed" Amy's voice piped up.

"This way, ladies" the man motioned gently, and Sara and Amy followed him to the section of king-sizes beds.

Amy's hand slipped out of Sara's as she went looking on her own while Sara kept standing talking with the salesman. A few minutes later Amy's voice was heard when she called out for her mother.

The bed against the far wall where Amy was standing was a full-sized and elegant one with an ornately carved wooden spool frame and tall posts rising from each corner. Sara estimated it probably was oak, and fairly sturdy despite its graceful appearance. She stepped closer patting the mattress with a gentle hand.

"Mom, can we get this one?" Amy asked, climbing onto the bed.

"Gee, sweetie," Sara raised an eyebrow as she looked the bed over, "you don't think it's a bit too much?"

"No it's perfect! The tall posts make it ideal to build a lair in" Amy confided conspiratorially.

"I guess but I don't think Sofia necessary need a bed that can turn into a lair" Sara said clearly amused.

Amy pursed her lips, "hmm no maybe not. But isn't it better to be prepared in case she wants to?" The girl argued.

Sara sighed and decided to just go for it and purchase the bed. It would mean a lot to Amy, and she hoped it would mean a lot to the woman she was in love with.

"Okay, okay" Sara replied, holding out her hands in surrender as she turned around facing the salesman. "I have the impression this is a lost battle so we will take the bed."

"An excellent choice if I may say so" the salesman replied with a smile.

As they reached the cash desk Amy looked at her mother and asked in bewilderment, "mom, how do we get the bed home?"

"The store will deliver it; the question is if they can make it before Christmas" Sara said, smiling kindly at her.

"I'm afraid that might be a problem, but let's have a look" the salesman replied.

After receiving their address he looked up their delivery order, "hmm, well it seems we have a shipment of furniture not too far away from you, so it should be possible to deliver it today but they can't make it before midevening."

"That's fine we won't be home most of the day anyway."

After leaving the store the ladies went home to unload the car and get lunch before they were off to The Rainbow Home to deliver Christmas gifts.

It was early in the evening when the doorbell chimed. "Hey, you got here" Sara smiled at the two men. One of them was long and lean, with a shaggy hair. The other was short and almost baldheaded, and held out a clipboard to her.

"Ms. Sara Sidle?"

"The one and only" she admitted, taking the paperwork and looking it over.

"We made good time," the shorter man ventured.

"I guess you did… well, the bedroom is ready so haul away…"

They did. Moving with the practice of an old team in sync, it only took them half an hour removing the old bed and replaces it with the new one.

Amy helped changing clean sheets onto the new bed and Sara carried the dirty ones to the laundry room, and then it was time for some hot cocoa and board games.

After Sara had tucked a very sleepy Amy into bed, she went into the library to wrap up the presents they had purchased for Amy's friends parents. For Adam's parents Sara had chosen a delicate champagne cooler with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. For Jill's parents she had purchased a gift basket of sweet-smelling bath supplies since they recently had acquired a spa bath.

The afternoon was spent with Jill and her parents, the girls went horseback riding before it was time to exchange gifts. Dinner was consumed at home and then it was time for Jasmine and Glenn's cocktail party.

Late Christmas Eve, Sara located her sleeping daughter and carted her to the car. Once she drove home and was able to deposit Amy into bed, she got to work on the presents. She loaded all of their gifts to the family under the tree and then stood back to take in the sight before going to bed knowing Amy would be up, early.

It was barely 8 a.m. before the whole family arrived. While Craig placed more presents under the tree Sara fetched the coffee, and soon everyone was ready for the present's distribution.

The kid's eyes seemed to grow wider as they opened present after present from pile of gifts. Everything was their favorite, everything they liked more than anything. The adults only smiled as they stuffed wrapping paper into a garbage bag. Sara took great joy in her daughter's bliss, but she still felt the sting of Sofia's absence.

When all the presents was unwrapped Amy turned to Sara, "I've gotta call Sofia and thank her!" She said excitedly.

Sara stopped her. "It's still early, Amy. She could be sleeping."

"Okay," Amy replied brightly, and then dived back into her presents with her cousins.

They all went into the kitchen where breakfast awaited. Done eating the kids went back to the living room to play with their gifts while the adults stayed at the table still in need of more coffee.

"So when are your girlfriend returning?" Craig chuckled.

"On the twenty-… who says..." Sara sighed loudly, "who told you?"

"You just did" Craig's voice was warm with humor, and Sara grinned.

"Well we sort of figured it out on our trip to Vegas, and I finally got around explaining it to Amy just the other day."

"And how did she take the news?" Laura asked curiously.

"Great actually" Sara replied with a smile, "though I'm not really sure she understands the meaning of it."

"Don't underestimate the knowledge of a seven-year-old" Ellen snickered.

"Allison and Ian have surprised us more than once over the years" Craig added, "and so what if she doesn't understand it all, the most important thing is she's fine with it."

Sara's smile widened, "yeah I know."

Since the snow didn't lasted the entire family decided to go ice-skating. They choose the temporary rink on Justin Herman Plaza instead of the one at Union Square expecting less people there.

When they returned back home Craig prepared the goose and placed it in the oven while Sara and Ellen made a light lunch. There was coffee after lunch, and conversation, and eventually a piece of apple pie.

Sara smiled, turning to her daughter who had suddenly become quiet, "what's wrong, Sunbeam?"

"What time is it?" Amy asked.

"It's 2:16 p.m. Why?"

Amy squirmed impatiently in her seat, "can I call Sofia now?"

Sara got up and found her cell phone, and handed it to her daughter. "Press down the number two and hold it."

"Who is number one?" Craig teased.

"Me" Amy giggled. She did as she was told and held the phone to her ear. Sara could hear it go straight to voicemail and quickly advised her daughter to just leave a message of thanks.

"Hey, Sofia!" Amy said into the receiver, "thank you so much for everything. I'm wearing the new charms on my bracelet and we are going to try out twister when I'm done calling. Uh… we bought something for you too, but I won't tell you what it is. Well… guess I'll see you when you get back. Bye."

Amy handed back the phone and everyone got up and went in to the living room to play twister, in the middle of the game Sara's phone started vibrating, she got up and reached into her pocket and got it out.

"Hi, am I disturbing?" Came Sofia's voice.

"Hold on." Sofia heard children's excited voices in the background, and then Sara, saying something she couldn't quite make out, obviously to someone else. A moment later, the sounds dropped off. "Hi, no now I should be able to hear you."

"Where are you?" Sofia asked, and Sara could tell by the low thrum of an engine that she was driving.

"Outside" Sara chortled, "it's quite loud playing twister."

"Do you have time to talk?"

"Yeah, I'm good. You just saved me from breaking my back" Sara chuckled. "So how are Vegas?"

"Same old. Very warm and to lighted" Sofia sighed exaggeratedly, to make Sara laugh.

"Of course," Sara replied with mock indignation, "otherwise it wouldn't be Vegas." The sun had almost vanished in a glory of clouds, and through the receiver she heard the engine stop and a car door open and close. "Did you get Amy's message?"

A click punctuated her words, and Sara's pleasure vanished as she realized that the connection had been broken. Frowning, she pulled her phone from her ear and looked down at it, but everything seemed to be in order. Punching the redial, she lifted it back to her ear, but the voice mail picked up immediately.

Sara's shoulders sagged, and she waited for the beep. "Sofia, we seem…" A hand touched her back, and Sara, startled, spun around, only to feel her eyes widen.

She looked tired and slightly rumpled, but it really was Sofia, smiling at her with her heart in her eyes. "Um... hi," she said hesitantly, her eyes wide and her hands curled into loose fists at her sides. "I, uh... merry Christmas?"

Sara reached out, not quite certain that Sofia wasn't conjured up by her wistful desire. But her cheek was warm and smooth against her palm, her chin firm under her thumb, and the evidence told her that she was there. "Merry Christmas, Sofia," she said.

Then she closed the gap between them, and Sofia wrapped her arms around her happily. Sara returned her hug, and then she put one hand on the back of her head and caught her mouth with hers, and with a rush of stunned joy Sofia realized that Sara had put it out in the open that Amy knew.

Something snapped inside her chest then, snapped into place, and Sofia returned her kiss with everything she could muster, feeling Sara tremble in her arms like she had before, knowing she was shaking just as much.

Eventually they calmed somewhat, more out of a need for oxygen than anything else; they leaned into each other, laughing a little from sheer astonishment. Sara managed to lift a hand to her face once more. "What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to celebrate Christmas with your family?"

Sofia laughed, stroking her cheek, still trying to take in the fact that her dearest dream had come true. "Yes, but I missed you." She stretched her head just slightly to kiss her again. And again.

The door swung open and Amy came running out, "hi Sofia, merry Christmas and thank you for the presents."

Sofia wrapped her arm around Amy's shoulders and gently hugged her, "hi Amy, you're welcome and a merry Christmas to you too."

Amy turned and looked at her mother, "mom, can I show Sofia what we bought for her?"

Sara flushed a little, her eyes going shy, "um… yeah guess you can" she gave an abashed shrug, and looked at Sofia, "let's get inside."

The house was noisy with chatter. After a quick hello Amy hauled Sofia into the bedroom to show her the bed along with an explanation of how suitable it was for building a lair. Sofia blushed a little and snickered a thank you followed by a hug before they went back to the rest of the family.

In the meantime Laura and Sara had set the coffee table with ice cream and coffee while Allison and Ian had reached a solution to watch _'__The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.'_

Sara and Sofia ended up at either end of the couch with Amy in the middle; the young Sidle devoured her ice cream and watched the screen with the dedication of true fans, though she'd seen it many times before. Sara, who perforce had seen it many times as well, savored her ice cream and watched Sofia covertly. Her attention seemed to be fixed on the screen also, though she ate her ice cream more slowly, sucking absently on the spoon when the story got exciting.

Sara decided to simply enjoy the moment. She had her family around her, the family she had only recently learned to value; she had Sofia back in her life, and while that might not be permanent, she had no desire to dwell on the future just now. Instead she interjected the occasional comment and noticed that Sofia seemed to have no trouble interacting with her family.

Every so often Sofia would lift her eyes from Amy or the screen to her, and the long deep looks… she couldn't help returning them for at least a few seconds, though half the time she dropped her own gaze before the movie drew Sofia's attention again.

Sensing her mood, Sofia smiled up at her, serene and sweet, and Sara drank her in for a long, long moment and the last tiny fear at the bottom of her heart finally eased, and she felt as though she were overflowing with intense, urgent warmth.

**The end **

**Author's note:** Well, if you made it to here I assume the story wasn't all too bad… Big thanks to those who took the time to review :-) Always nice to hear what thoughts people make about the things I write :o)


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